All Mye Queen's Men, Chronicles of Love - Volume II, page 28
“What? No! How many times did you do it?”
“Man, who the fuck knows. First few hours I was high on the Ecstasy so I don't really know. But around four or five in the morning it was all me and I guess we made love at least three more times after that.”
“You know what I want to know don't you? So dish the shit. How was it?”
“At first I thought it was because I was high on E and shit but later I knew that, that was hands down the best pussy I've had in my entire life. That shit fit me like a fucking glove. It was like God made that pussy just for my dick. Her pussy and my dick were created to be together.”
“Like pussy and dick soul mates and shit?” Dorian laughed.
“Yeah, some crazy shit like that.”
“Slow your roll playa. The triple truth of the matter is that I've heard Teddy say the same shit. And he currently holds the blue print, floor plan, copyright and patent on that snatch. So before you even start day dreaming about the rainbows, drum drops, unicorns and cupcakes you experienced while you were in it you'd better think about that shit. Because that mother fucka is going to lose his fuckin mind when he finds out that you've stretched his shit out of shape.”
“Fuck that nigga! Queen was justified every single time she slobbed my knob. You act like he gives a shit about her. If he cared he wouldn't be fucking his way through the entire Earth Angel cheerleader's roster, two at a fuckin time.”
“He's knocking down Earth Angels two at a time? Damn that's one lucky ass bastard! Hey, I'm with you. The way he cheats on Queen is as scandalous as a hooker turning tricks in heaven. Still, despite all that shit, he loves the hell out of that woman.”
“Then he needs to find another way to show her.”
“He's doing the best he can, considering the circumstances. You know he got all fucked up after Paul was killed. That's when he changed and basically started wiping his ass with a different woman every night. But Queen is still the reigning queen in his life. Just the sound of her name gets that big nigga's dick hard.”
“That may be so, but it’s one thing to say you love somebody and another to show them you love them. And frankly I'm tired of everybody making excuses for his cheating ass. This nigga's just stringing her along and giving her a lot of lip service about loving her.”
“No, I'll tell you what this nigga's giving her. This nigga's giving her millions at a fucking time. Jade told me that yesterday he sent Queen a custom Cadillac convertible and put a damn Plum American Express Card, with her name on it, in the arm rest. And don't get me started on his will and the dough he's stashed away for her in various bank accounts, just in case something happens to his ass. You know that I would know, because I'm his lawyer. Your boy's stone cold bananas over this girl.”
“Nigga, that's money not love. The woman was literally starved for the touch of a man. I hardly touched her before she started climaxing. Your boy’s slipping. And I don't mean any harm or any disrespect but I'm going to have to pick up the slack on this one. I'm seriously into this girl. She could be the one. No check that… I know she’s the one.”
“I'll be honest. Mye Queen is a bad ass bitch, no doubt about it. But you'd better find another one, cause this shit ain't going to fly far with Teddy. Don't think for a minute that he's going to let you walk away with his honey pot. And for the record I don't know a damn thing about it, so don't even think about dragging me in it. So let's get our stories together. Cause I love my new whip and you and Queen ain't going to fuck it up for me with y'all bullshit.”
“Whatever nigga. I don't need a damn story and I don't give a fuck if he finds out. If he don't want to TCB then I sure nuff fucking will. Queen deserves better. If he wants her he's going to have to do better.”
“All I know is that you'd better see where Queen's head is before you get caught out there by your damn self. Because I can see this shit is going to get real funky real quick.”
“I don't know where her head is right now, but there was a reason that it was between my legs last night and this morning. She was down even after I told her that Teddy was at the airport. So, it's whatever. I'll play it by ear. I don't want her to get caught up, but if she wants to cancel that nigga's contract I'm going to option her for life. Fuck Teddy!”
“The shit was that good? You just going to go out like that? Just say fuck your friend, just like that?”
“The shit was better than that good.” Christian declared.
“Well just don't forget that I don't know a damn thing about it. And if he asks why we're late, it's because I had to pick your monkey ass up from your house where you spent the night, alone.”
“Whatever. He's going to know something is up because the pussy ain't going to fit right anymore. Cause I knocked a hole in that shit. My dick was harder than a damn raw diamond.”
“What the fuck ever nigga! You're a pussy doctor, you should know that pussy is resilient. That shit is like super fantastic elastic, bubble plastic. That shit will be snapped back in shape by noon.” Dorian laughed. “Nigga, babies come out that shit and six weeks later little dick niggas are enjoying the pussy. Pussy is an amazing thing. I am thoroughly convinced that it is God's greatest creation.”
“Amen to that shit brutha. Amen!” Christian laughed in agreement, before turning concerned.
“You don't think she's going to fuck him tonight do you?”
“Nigga what planet are you from? Yes she's going to fuck him, buck him and suck him! That mother fucka's worth over a 100 million dollars. That dick is like a 24 karat gold lollipop to that girl. She has to fuck him. They haven't slept together in over three months. Shit, Teddy is going to wax that ass like a fuckin Hawaiian surf board.”
“Queen's not like that. She's not impressed by that nigga's wealth.”
“You're right, she's not impressed by his money, because his money is her money. She's in love with that charismatic nigga. Else she would have left his ass years ago. He's already given her enough money to set her and her great, great grandchildren for life. She could have walked away a millionaire a long time ago. I got to give you your props though. I've never known her to give a broke nigga a whiff of that pussy until now. So kudos to you for that. Hey take it for what it was, a fantastic hail Mary mercy fuck.”
“Nigga I've never had a mercy fuck in my life. When I asked her would she make love to me, do you know what she said?”
“No nigga. What?”
“She said, ‘I thought you'd never ask.’ Does that sound like a mercy fuck to you? She wanted me, plain and simple.”
“Teddy better watch his ass. Queen might finally be tired of his bullshit. Still man, just chill back and see how shit plays out. Don't set your hopes that shit is going to go any further than it already has.”
“Fucking dumb ass Jon. I don't know whether to thank him or beat his simple monkey ass.”
“Shit! You need to send that retarded mother fucka a fruit basket and shit. You made love to Mye fucking Queen. Shit! You need to give that nigga a hundred dollar tip or something.”
“I guess you're right about that.” Christian agreed.
“And just so you know- nigga I don't know shit! I'm like those three dumb ass monkeys. I didn't see shit. I didn't hear shit. And I don't know a fuckin thing about shit!”
The two got a good laugh as they drove the remaining way to the airport. Christian was understandably worried. He knew that Queen wanted his body, but he wasn’t quite sure if she was willing to give him her heart to get it.
As they pulled up to the airport Christian's phone rings. It was Teddy. “Yeah what's up?”
“Where are you bitches at?”
“We’re right behind that preposition. We're pulling up in front now. Which airline did you come in on?
“I keep telling you- I'm a super star, biotch. I flew in on a private jet. Meet me at the International Terminal.”
“He's at the International terminal.” Christian informs Dorian. Alright, we're coming around. Do you need me to come in and get you, Mr. Super Star?”
“Hell yeah. Come get some of these damn bags. I'm just inside the terminal.”
Teddy is standing in the terminal with a shit load of bags, looking just like the Super Star he claimed to be. A small crowd of fans are around him taking pictures and getting autographs. Christian takes a big breath, clears his head, and exhales deeply as he waits for the crowd to dissipate. He walks over to greet his best friend with a genuine, big hug and love as the final fans leave.
“What's up my brother from another mother? Good to see you. I’m glad you made it.”
“Nothing much. I’m glad to be here too. Mye Queen was sweating the salt off a nigga's balls. Good to see you too man.”
“Where the hell are you going with all these bags, nigga?”
“Home, nigga. I'm going to spend some time with my woman. I just told you she's tripping on a nigga.”
“So, how long are you planning to stay?”
“Hell, I don't know. Shit, as long as it takes. Queen's been down for me. I got to make her know that I'm still there for her.”
“Alright, well let's get all of this shit out to the truck.”
~*~*~
What's up nigga? So, you ready to do this shit or what?” Teddy laughed as he climbed in the front seat of Dorian’s new Escalade.
“Hells yeah! Now, that I got all my boys to drag my ass up that aisle. I'm glad you made it man.”
“Hey, I didn't have a choice. Queen's been mind fucking a nigga. Talking all this shit about creeping on me. I can't have my pussy running wild and shit, looking for a new dick to lick.”
“Especially not that pussy. Any nigga would be happy to get a little of that Kat nip. Right Chris?” Dorian laughs as he looks up in the rear view mirror at Christian who is seated in the back. Christian discreetly flashes him the finger. Dorian laughs even harder.
“What the fuck ever. You know Jade sent me a picture of some stripper with his head up my baby's skirt. I almost lost my fuckin mind.”
“She sent you what?” Christian asked intrigued.
“She sent me a picture of this nigga with his big ass head up Queen’s skirt. That shit fucked me up! I'm at home chilling and shit and I get a picture message from Queen. And this bullshit comes over.” Teddy holds up his phone for Dorian to see the picture.
“Damn! Somebody was having a good time.” Dorian laughed.
“Hey let me see that.” Christian asked as he takes the cell phone and examines the picture. “Yeah I saw this nigga there, but that wasn't the nigga she left with.”
Dorian busts out laughing. “Nigga that's cold blooded. You just going to out Queen like that?”
“What the fuck are you two talking about? Queen went where with who?”
Christian just laughed. “I’m certain that’s not him.”
“Yeah man, she slipped away with this big, handsome, cock diesel looking nigga. Kind of put you in the mind of Christian and shit.”
“Come to think of it he did resemble me a little. And you know how fuckin fine I am.” Christian joked.
“Where the fuck were you two bitches and why didn't you stop her? How the hell are you going to let my girl leave with some big dick stripper?” Teddy asked annoyed.
“Come to think of it the nigga did have a big old Zulu bulge and shit.” Christian remarked.
Dorian agreed. “Yeah he did. That nigga could hardly keep his pants zipped.” They both laughed even harder.
“Where is she now? Give me my damn phone. Let me call her ass and see what the fuck is up. She must have lost her fuckin mind.” Teddy snatches his phone from Christian and attempts to call Queen.
“Chill nigga. Calm the fuck down! Damn, we're just yanking your chain and shit.” Christian laughed as he returned Teddy’s phone to him.
“Look man, the girls were just blowing off steam. That shit is as harmless as a lap dance.” Dorian tried to assure him.
“Oh really, cause I got pictures of a nigga with his face in your Brides milk duds and up her skirt.” Teddy counters as he shows Dorian a picture of a stripper motor boating in between Jade's breast and another picture with a stripper licking her thighs.
“Let me see that shit. What the fuck is that bullshit about? Oh I can see that I’m going to have to fuck somebody up.” Christian and Teddy laugh as Dorian nearly runs off the road trying to get a good look at the pictures.
“Hey, hey, hey! Keep your eyes on the damn road nigga. You gonna kill us all.” Christian laughed.
“My bad man. I shouldn't have shown you that shit while you were driving and shit.” Teddy laughed. “So where are our little stray pussy cats anyway?”
“Somewhere running around taking care of some last minute wedding shit. Did you call Queen and let her know that you're here?” Dorian answered.
“Nope. She'll know I'm here when she sees me. Hopefully your big mouth ass didn't tip her off.”
“Yeah, about that. Jade was with me when you called. I told her not to say anything but you know how that shit goes.”
“Oh I know exactly how that shit went. I might as well call her ass right now.” Teddy dials Queen's cell, but there is no answer. He leaves a message. “Hello Mama Bear. Papa Bear's home and he's looking for his honey. Hit me back.”
“Hey man pullover. This soft, corn porn mother fucka just made me throw up in my mouth.” Christian teased.
“Nigga stop hating. Did you get this nigga some pussy like I told you to?” Teddy laughs as he questions Dorian.
Dorian laughs as he looks in the rear view mirror at Christian to see his response to the question. “Oh yeah, he got some pussy alright. Not only did he get some pussy. This nigga rolled around in it all fuckin night like he owned it. Told me that the pussy had him seeing rainbows and unicorns and fairies or some shit.”
“That was the Ecstasy, mother fucka. Anyway, nigga, you said that shit I didn't.” Christian corrected him.
“Nigga, you implied it!”
“Hold the fuck up! Oh you got to back this shit up. Start from the beginning. This nigga took some E.”
“And Viagra at the same fucking time.” Dorian laughed.
“Nigga, you popped some E and V at the same fucking time? What the fuck was you thinking and who the hell where you trying to fuck?”
“I didn't do it intentionally. The shit was an accident. Stupid ass Jon and his band of flying monkeys thought that it would be funny to put some E and Viagra in a shot of Tequila and give it to this nigga.”
“Ecstasy and Viagra at the same time? Nigga! I know you were hornier than the brass section of the Baltimore Symphony Orchestra.”
“This mother fucka's dick was so hard he couldn't even zip up his damn pants.”
“What! So get to the unicorns and shit.”
“Let this nigga tell it. Cause I ain't never had any pussy that took my ass on a trip to Fantasy Island like that.”
“Fuck that shit. Queen's shit has had me screaming, "The plane! The plane! The mother fucking plane!" Like that Tattoo bitch. Shit, that's why I hula hooped through a Cheerio just to get here. I was on the phone all damn day yesterday trying to get my ass to Baltimore.”
“Oh Yeah? I bet that shit is so good it has your ass speaking in tongues and shit.” Dorian jokes as he checks Christian's reflection in the rear view mirror.
Teddy laughs. “Well, I have been known to catch the Holy Ghost every now and then.”
Christian ignores Dorian's digs and continues the story. “So anyway, these niggas give this shit to my boy, who already had way too much to drink. So I asked that fool Jon what was in it. The nigga just said it's a shot of Tequila. So I downed it and told him that this nigga is drunk enough. So then Jon's bitch ass tells me what they had done. I wanted to knock his porch monkey ass out. He could have at least tried to stop me.”
“Yeah, but now this nigga talking about sending Jon a fucking fruit basket or some shit cause he tapped the best pussy he ever had in his life. This nigga told me that God made this pussy with his dick in mind.” Dorian added.
“Damn, this mother fucka already sprung and shit? Nigga are you sprung? Seriously? Who's this chick?”
“Some girl from the party and shit.” Dorian nonchalantly replies.
“She's a pro from the bachelor party?” Teddy asked shocked. “Please don’t tell me she’s a stripper. Nigga, you got turned out by a stripper?”
“No Nigga. She is not a stripper, she's a woman I hooked up with at the after party in the Penthouse. You know me better than that.”
“She's not a stripper hoe she's a lady. In fact she's a queen.” Dorian adds as she checks the mirror for Christian's response.
Christian flashes Dorian a dirty look and mouths, “Shut the fuck up!”
“I know you must have worn her ass the fuck out, as horny as your ass was. How many times did you hit that shit?”
“Nigga, I don't even know? I wasn't counting. She worked with it as long as it was hard, which was about three or four hours and shit. Then finally we both fell asleep.”
“She's coming to the wedding right?” Teddy asked intrigued. “Cause I got to meet the woman that's got your ass strung out after one night.”
“Oh hell no! Yeah, she's coming but not with me.”
“Who brings a damn date to a wedding? Nigga that's like taking sand to the fucking beach.” Dorian laughed.
“True that… I'm going stag. Besides that was just a onetime thing and shit. She's involved with some hard head.”
“She can't be too damn involved. She let your big dick ass demolish her shit for four hours. All I know is that there's going to be a mad mother fucka when he rolls back in that shit.” Teddy and Dorian laugh.
“He's gonna be as mad as a son of a bitch.” Dorian joked as he watched Christian squirm in his seat.
“What about this nigga? Did he behave?” Teddy pointed to Dorian.
“Yeah, What about you, Mr. Nigga? Did you behave?” Christian teased Dorian.
“Why I got to be Mr. Nigga? Hey, I'm going to plead the Fifth like this bitch.” Dorian points back to Christian. “A gentleman never tells.”
