All Mye Queen's Men, Chronicles of Love - Volume II, page 18
Christian laughs uncontrollably. Well, in retrospect it was funny. Teddy was so out of touch with reality and his situation with Queen that it never once crossed his mind that he could possibly be the limp dick bitch that they were talking about. Naturally, he knew that Queen was an extraordinarily beautiful woman and that men vied for her attention every single day. It just never occurred to him that Christian was one of them. In Teddy's mind he had one and only one rival for the throne of Queen's heart and that was Logic. Little did he know that he sealed his own fate when he demanded that Queen stop fuckin around with him. Queen's sexual relationship with Logic came to an abrupt end and Christian immediately took his place in line and his turn as king and the keeper of Queen's panties.
“I know that shit is right. I didn't really look at it that way. So, I don't even need to convince my girl to get rid of his ass? I just have to get Pretty Kitty on my side. Let her talk to her owner for me. Cause we all know that when the pussy talks, the bullshit got to walk.”
“You got that shit right. Talk to that pussy. Hell, sing to that pussy if you have to. If you get Pretty Kitty to fall in love with you, you're in there. I don’t give a fuck how much money that nigga got. That nigga could be as rich as me, I bet you she’ll send his ass packing.”
“You're right. I've been going about it all wrong. Here I am sending flowers, taking her out and cooking for her and shit and she is still strung out on that simple nigga.”
“That just means that when Farmer Brown finally does come to town he is plowing the hell out of that field! That nigga’s planting corn, lima beans, cotton and tobacco. He's got her pussy in his pocket and until you get it in yours you ain't got shit coming, nigga. Well except a box of tissues, assortment of lotions and a hard ass dick to contend with.”
“You're probably right. Cause she ain't trying to trade that nigga in for a better model. And I know that God didn't make them any finer than me. I just couldn't understand what the hell was up.”
“What’s up is that she got a good thing and she knows it. She’s got you strung out on her- slipping and tripping over her phat ass. She does have a phat ass doesn't she?”
“Oh the phatist. Ass so fine it'll make you thank her father for being born.”
“Oh so she's like Queen one of those onion booties. Ass so fine it makes you cry every time it walks away from you.”
“Exactly! You know exactly what I'm talking about.”
“I don't know? You haven't seen an ass as fine as Mye Queen's. Take your girl's fine ass and multiply it by ten and you may have a glimpse of what I'm dealing with. God didn't make an ass as fine as Queen's. Fuck, that ass is like sunshine in the spring.”
“I bet it is. And I bet I'll see.” Christian mumbled as he casually took another sip of his beer.
“What did you say?” Teddy asks as he shoots Christian a suspicious look.
“I said oh I see.”
“Anyway, like I was saying, Old girl got you drooling over her and she’s got Farmer Brown paying all her bills and knocking the bottom out of that ass with a twelve inch ding dong. So put your damn apron up Susie Homemaker. Get off that plane, snatch that ass in a broom closet or some shit and simply wear it the fuck out! Then walk the hell away. You know that she's just using your ass to make her feel pretty, while Old Dog ain't around. I can't even believe you. I'm about to revoke your Swagger Card.”
“Yeah, I know that she's been playing me, but I've been enjoying every second of it. It's just that I'm really feeling her. Hey, I just have to change the game plan. The shit's real complex.” Christian concluded as he wipes himself with the towel and then finishes off his beer.
“Complex, or not. What you got to do is whip that pussy into submission and let her and her nigga know it's been tamed.” Teddy laughs as he gives Christian a pound, and then clears the glasses from the bar and places them in the sink.
“I feel you on that.”
“Not to change the subject, but let me ask you something. Why didn't you go pro, Mr. Basketball? You had all these teams trying to sign you and you just walked away and enrolled in medical school. What up with that shit?”
“It just wasn't in my plans. I played ball because I loved it and it allowed me to go to school for free. I must admit I loved all the attention and the prime time, top shelf pussy was nice too. But my goal was to go to medical school. I never intended to play professional ball. That wasn't my thing. I just wanted to be a doctor. Besides I'm too short for the NBA.”
“Whatever nigga, you're six feet four. Five foot nothing niggas get drafted into the NBA, with far less talent than you.”
“Yeah, but I didn't want to play, plain and simple. Playing ball was merely a means to an end for me. I never intended for it to be my career. You were born to be a ball player. I on the other hand was born to be a doctor.”
“So, do you get a woody when they call you Dr. Love, or some shit, because I just don't get it?”
“I'm really not that easily aroused. I like practicing medicine. It makes me feel good about being me. Besides I had started to unravel in college with that superstar ball player lifestyle and all the bullshit that goes with it. My momma didn't raise me like that. So I knew pro ball was not going to turn me into the man she wanted me to be. So, I had to take a pass. I think it worked out well. I mean I'm not living as extravagant as you are but I'm happy and extremely comfortable. Most important, I'm a man that my mom would have been proud to call her son. Well, that is if she had lived.”
“Yeah, that's what's up. So, what kind of doctor are you? And please don't tell me that you are a Gynecologist.”
“Okay, I won't tell you that I am a Gynecologist then.”
“Oh hell to the no! Dr. Love is a Pussyologist. What the hell where you thinking?”
“Hey, it just happened to be my niche. I don't know. I do know that I have more patients than I can handle and an extremely successful practice.”
“I guess you would. What woman would turn down and opportunity to let a nigga that look like you play in her pussy?”
“You're so damn ignorant. I'm not exactly playing in their pussy. You're right though. I do have a lot of patients who are more concerned by how I look than what I know. But that's cool cause I know that I'm a damn good doctor and they still get the benefit of my expertise.”
“How the hell do you play around in Lady Town, after Lady Town all day long and go home and ain't getting any? Personally, I'd be so sick of pussy, I wouldn't even be able to get a woody.”
Christian mimics a deaf mute and makes hand gestures, as if he is doing sign language. “Again, nigga! I'm not playing in the pussy! I am a fucking professional!” They both burst out laughing.
“And you called me ignorant. You’re the ignorant bastard. That shit is not called for. Matter of fact, it's just wrong. A deaf person's gonna beat your ass if they catch you doing that shit.”
Christian mimics a deaf mute and flashes his made up sign language gestures again. “I wish a Bitch would!” Robust laughter ensues again.
“Man that shit ain't funny. Yeah it is, but stop. Don't do that shit anymore.”
“I'm sorry, my bad. But that's the only way I can get it through your thick head that I'm not down their giving hand jobs and shit. It's my profession. There's only one Lady Town on my mind. All those other trips to Lady Town don't mean a damn thing to me.”
“Hey, all I'm saying is that fumbling around in pussy all day sounds like good work if you can get it.”
“Yeah, I guess you’re right about that.”
“Look, I know you and Queen are good friends and shit, but you're not her Gynecologist, are you?”
“What? Are you asking me am I fumbling around in Queen's pussy?” Christian sarcastically asked. “I shouldn't even dignify this shit with an answer, but no. I haven't visited your woman's Ladytown.”
“Hey I'm just checking and shit? Dorian can risk letting you play around in Jade's koochie, but fuck that bullshit. I'm not fuckin having it!”
“You're an ignorant ass somebody. Jade is my patient. It's not like I'm finger fucking her and shit. How you going to say some simple shit like that?” Christian laughed. “You know what this conversation is over... Just take me to my room I need to get in the shower. I can smell my own funk.”
“Hell, I think I smell myself too. I smell like boodicssy.” Teddy responded as he sniffed his arm pits.
“What the hell is boodicssy?” Christian asked confused.
“Booty, dick and pussy all blended up into one.”
“You nasty ass bastard. You didn't even bother to take a ten minute shower after laying up in ass all night and day.”
“I never pegged you for such a hater. It really isn't becoming. I didn’t have time to hit the shower before you came. You better be glad I brushed my teeth.” Teddy laughed as he pretended to give Christian a kiss.
“Oh, hell no! Back the fuck up Teddy! Wash your ass and gargle with some mouthwash, nigga. Then you can hug me. Your breath is probably what smells like boodicssy.” Christian half halfheartedly attempts to push his best friend away several times and then gives in and hugs him tight. “It's good to see you again Baby Bear. It's been a minute since we hung out like this.”
“Good to see you too man. I thought you'd never bring your ass to California to see me, now that you are Dr. Love and shit.”
The two retrieve Christian's clothing and leave the basketball court laughing, joking and clowning around. Christian knew that now was not the right time or the place to talk to Teddy about Queen. He could see that despite Teddy’s money, fame and success that he’d be nothing without her. Queen was the glue that held Teddy together and prevented him from completely unraveling right before the public’s eyes. Christian hated to admit it but Teddy needed Queen a hell of a lot more than he could ever want her. He understood why Queen could not leave or betray Teddy. It would devastate him and he’d never fully recover. So, for now Christian was content to continue with the status quo a little while longer.
CHAPTER 23
It's Christian's birthday and Queen has planned a very special surprise. She had grown very close to him over the past few months and she wanted to show him exactly how she felt about him. Actually, she had grown a little too close to him. The physical attraction between them had begun to spiral dangerously out of control. Yet, they could not, or would not stay away from each other.
Queen’s Kitty Kat purred so loud when Christian was around she could hardly hear herself think. And cold showers in the middle of the night had become a nightly ritual for Christian. Still they remained loyal to Teddy and kept their friendship strictly platonic. But Queen had finally had enough and decided that it was time to push the envelope and redefine the boundaries of their relationship. She had it on good authority that Teddy was back up to his old bullshit again even though she kept her word and kept her ass away from Logic. Sick of the betrayal and the bullshit excuses Queen orchestrated a surprise for Christian guaranteed to get her out of the friends forever zone.
As they finish dinner Christian was intrigued by Queen’s promise of a surprise for the evening. “Queen, dinner was delicious. I didn’t realize that you could throw down like this. I’m impressed. So, what's this big surprise that you have for me?”
“I don't know… I said to myself, ‘What do you give to a man that has everything?’ Then it hit me. You give him the one thing he's never had, but has always wanted.”
“Oh, yeah? And what's that?”
“Give me a minute and you'll see.” Queen arises from the table and takes the scarf from around her neck. She cautiously approaches Christian from the rear and gently ties the scarf around his eyes.
“What are you doing?” he asked, a little confused.
“Do you trust me?”
“Sure, but what's going on?”
“You'll see. Just follow me.”
Holding him by the hand, Queen leads the blindfolded Christian out of the formal dining room to the lower level of her home. They enter a dark room with a regal high back armchair facing a stripper pole mounted on a low rise stage.
Queen seats the anxious, blindfolded Christian in the chair and disappears. Curious, he calls to her, “Queen, what’s up. Where are you?”
“I’m right here. Take your blindfold off.”
Christian quickly unties the scarf. He looks around to accumulate himself to his surroundings. His eyes are immediately drawn to a spotlight shinning on the stripper pole on the stage as soft music permeates the darkness.
Suddenly a stunning, scantly clothed, long hair blonde emerges from the darkness and begins to seductively dance around a pole. As the music plays she effortlessly mounts and spins around the pole like a professional. With her eyes closed she dances, sways and gyrates to the sexually suggestive lyrics.
Christian’s jaw drops and he falls back in the plush chair in amazement upon realizing that it is Queen. “What the fuck?” He mumbled. “Ah shit...”
Mesmerized, Christian continued to watch in silence as Queen performed her sultry pole dance routine. As the music draws to an end Queen dramatically dismounts from the pole in a dramatic full split. She leaves the stage and straddles Christian and gives him a lap dance as another song begins.
Stunned, aroused, and horny as hell, he somehow manages to speak. “Queen I .....”
Queen quickly interrupts him with a seductive, southern accent. “I'm Candy, baby.”
“I don't think that this is a very good idea.” Christian continues as he feels the blood drain from his big and head and immediately rush to his little head.
“Baby, what’s wrong. You don't like Candy?”
“Oh I love Candy, but...”
“Then just relax and let Candy make all your birthday wishes come true.” Queen urges as she continues to gyrate in Christian's lap.
Christian’s manhood quickly swells even larger as if that were possible as he uncomfortably squirms beneath Queen’s bubble butt. “Queen, please. We really shouldn't be doing this.”
“It's okay sugar. I told you, I'm Candy, not Queen.”
“Okay, Candy... we can't do this.”
“Baby, it's your birthday. Just tell Candy what you want.” Queen continues to dance, and gyrate on Christian’s hard as she boldly takes a chance and kisses him in the mouth.
Momentarily distracted and confused Christian gives in and kisses her back. They kiss passionately as Queen attempts to undo her bra. Unable to undo the clasp alone she momentarily breaks character and asks Christian for help. “Unhook my bra. I can't get it.”
Christian who continues to seek her lips as she tries to speak is abruptly snatched back to reality when Queen's real voice and her forbidden request rings loud and clear in his ear. He quickly grabs her hand and stops her before she takes her bra off. Holding her wrist tight, he tries to compose himself. “Look, Queen...”
Queen quickly returns to character. “Candy, call me Candy, baby.”
“Okay, Candy. I'm sorry, but I can't do this.”
“What? Why? What's wrong?” Queen asked bewildered.
Christian loosens his grip on Queen's wrist. He hesitates as he chooses his words carefully and then speaks. “Candy, I'm in love with somebody and I can't do this. This isn't right.”
Horny and determined to get some, Queen attempts to engage his lips in another steamy kiss. Weak, Christian gives in briefly before he forces himself to stop. “Queen stop! Please don't make this harder than it already is.”
Queen’s hand boldly moves to Christian’s crouch and rubs his hard. “Sugar, I don't think it can get any harder than it already is. Let Candy make you happy.” She responds in her sexy southern drawl.
Christian quickly grabs her hands again. “Okay… Look, Queen, I mean Candy. As I was saying, I'm in love with somebody and as hard as it may be I'm going to have to pass.”
Initially struggling against his restraint, Queen stops resisting. Frustrated she gives up.
“So, who is she?”
“She's Mye Queen.”
“Okay, then make love to her. What’s the problem?”
“You know why I can't.”
“No, actually I don’t. Enlighten me.”
“She belongs to my best friend.”
“People don't belong to other people.”
“Unfortunately, sometimes they do.”
“Well then make love to Candy. Let her be your queen for the night.”
“I can't. God knows I want to, but I just can't.”
“Why can't you? No one has to ever know.”
“I'll know and you’ll know.”
“But, it’s your birthday. Queen attempts to kiss Christian again. This time he stands up, forcing her off of his lap.”
“Look, Candy. As flattered and as horny as I may be I can't do this. So, I'm going to go back upstairs and wait for Queen. So if you see her could you please tell her that I need to talk to her. Christian releases her and turns to walk away.
Pissed, Queen pulls the wig off of her head and slings it across the room. She flops down in the chair in frustration and moans, “Why does he have to be such a fucking boy scout?”
The fully clothed Queen returns upstairs moments later to find Christian at the bar. Obviously upset, he pours a shot of whiskey and quickly downs it. He immediately pours another shot and knocks it back too before cringing from its sting. He slams the glass hard on the counter and prepares to pour another.
Queen takes a seat at the bar. “So, do you think that's going to help? If so then pour me one.”
Christian doesn't respond as he pours another shot and gives it to Queen. He takes a stool next to her at the bar. “Queen, I know you're probably mad...”
“You think? Do you know how long it took me to....”
“I know, but hear me out. I know that you're mad, but I don't want to start something that you're not willing and able to finish.”
“What are you talking about? I had every intention of finishing what I started.”
“Yeah, but for how long? Oh yeah, that's right- for one night.” Christian sarcastically responded.
“That was just a figure of speech.”
