Totally Worth It, page 16
It seemed everything had fallen by the wayside. Her house was still completely unfinished. Only the master bedroom and the living room had undergone any kind of decorating at all. She’d intended to make one of the spare bedrooms into an office, but currently it still housed the remainder of her unpacked boxes. Not that it mattered—she was never home long enough to work there anyway. And she still had to fully remodel the guest bedroom. Right now it was solely occupied by her old futon with its ripped and tattered cover, battle scars from the doorways and staircases of her previous apartments. She had plans for that room. She wanted it to be a real guest room, inviting and cozy. Her sister had even promised to help her with the color scheme.
Her sister, that was a whole other story. Since Meg had moved to Staten Island, she had barely seen Shannon and Matt or her adorable niece. Come to think of it, she had actually seen her sister and brother-in-law more when she lived in Brooklyn. That was going to change. All of it was, she promised herself.
*
Toward the end of March, things almost started to fall into place. Meg closed out two major London projects and Nigel was made the project manager on a third, which left Meg the lead associate on only one. Allegedly the remaining project would be turned over to Sasha Michaels by the end of the month. Rumor had spread through the London office that Sasha’s mother’s health had stabilized, and the phantom herself would be returning to work full-time. Meg couldn’t help keeping her fingers crossed that it was true.
It couldn’t happen soon enough anyway, Meg thought as she sat in the airport on April 1, waiting in JFK for her flight to board, like some cruel April Fool’s prank, a precious few days before she was to leave for Provincetown. Unfortunately, the eternally needy team at Davis Pruitt had insisted that she be present at the new prospectus rollout. Meg was certain it was something she could do by video—a battle she’d lost before it even started. Meg had made it clear to all the players that she absolutely had to be back home by the weekend.
Mia had been right, seeing Becca was inevitable. Meg had made her peace with it and was determined to have a good time in P-town. Lexi had told her about all her favorite places to eat and Meg was excited to check some of them out. She had bookmarked the house she had rented with Sam, Julie, and Julie’s roommates and had visited the site at least a hundred times. The house was small, but it would certainly do. Since Julie’s roommates were both bringing their girlfriends, the three single girls—Meg, Sam, and Julie—were expected to share a room. No big deal, since she thoroughly expected to spend at least one night with Mia at Betsy’s anyway.
*
From her dining room window, Lexi watched as Meg dashed toward Sam’s Jeep Wrangler, duffel bag slung over her shoulder as she climbed into the backseat behind Julie.
Lexi was jealous. She loved Provincetown, and she hadn’t been there in years. Meg would fill her in on every last detail when she returned, which would no doubt add to her envy. But she knew in her heart that staying back had been the right thing to do. Sharing a house with Julie, even for a weekend, was a bad idea. They were slowly, painstakingly trying to be friends. A weekend in a shared house with tons of alcohol was ill advised.
Although she hadn’t had the courage to ask Meg, she was certain Jesse would be there. She did have a house at the Cape, after all. Her presence at such a huge weekend was pretty much a no-brainer. Lexi could almost see her breezing in to Tabitha’s, commanding attention with her subtle charisma.
Lexi hadn’t seen Jesse in weeks, since the day Lucy had come in to sign the settlement agreement. Lexi had been nervous because it would be her last day at Stanton Ducane and she didn’t feel ready to be done yet. It all happened so fast. Lucy had brought her prim girlfriend along, who’d sat ramrod straight by her side the entire time, never speaking a word. Jesse had taken the time to go over each component of the contract, making sure Lucy understood its weight. Lucy had been anxious but unwavering. She’d fully comprehended that her signature meant accepting responsibility for the accident and that she would never be a police officer again. She hadn’t even bothered to ask questions. She listened. She nodded. When the time came, she signed. Then she left.
That was it. It was over.
Lexi and Jesse hadn’t moved from the conference room. They’d remained there, talking about the wording of the agreement, the settlement amount, how it would be dispersed to Lucy, and a myriad of other banal details regarding the arrangement. None of what they had discussed was particularly important or worthy of the conversation, really. It had occurred to Lexi that they were both stalling, neither of them quite sure how to end it. Then they were robbed of a farewell entirely when Laney and Allison had burst in, declaring that they were taking Lexi to lunch. Jesse passed on the invite, citing a client meeting later in the day. Lexi kept a brave face and forced herself to smile, although she was sure the disappointment showed in her eyes. She had known Jesse’s calendar was clear. She’d blocked the entire afternoon for Lucy Weston, just in case.
Lunch had been fine, nice even. But she had left her internship feeling completely unfinished where Jesse was concerned.
Later that afternoon, when the sun was starting to set on the deserted street, Lexi stared out the window at Jesse’s empty driveway and cursed herself. Screw Julie and their stupid drama. She should have gone to P-town and tracked Jesse down. Then she would have had the opportunity to thank her boss for her time, for her mentoring…fuck, who was she kidding? She just wanted to see her.
She turned from the window and started to set up her laptop and class notes at the dining room table. With a deep breath she washed away her thoughts of Jesse and Julie, of P-town, Meg, and Sam and willed herself to do some work. She planted her butt firmly in the hard-backed chair and attempted to focus. One way or the other, she was going to get something out of this weekend.
Chapter Seventeen
Saturday afternoon, Lexi took a break from her books and walked Butter through the nearly vacant rental section. She was enjoying the feel of the late-day sun on her face and, for once, she didn’t have to rush through this area. The rental section had always been her favorite part of the development because of its proximity to the ridge. Just beyond a thicket of trees lay a steep drop-off to the beach below and a breathtaking view of the New York City skyline. Since her breakup with Julie, Lexi rarely headed over this way. She’d hoped Butter would comply today and allow her a glimpse of the scene. Instead, the old dog pulled on his leash, eager to get back inside where he could sprawl out on the cool kitchen tile.
It was unseasonably warm for this time of year, the temperature reaching into the low eighties by the middle of the day. Lexi took pity on the dog and cut the walk shorter than she wanted. Scooting down the path that led to her block, Lexi was surprised not to see more people outside enjoying the summer preview. More people had gone to Save Tabitha’s than she thought. But she couldn’t hide her ear-to-ear smile as she came upon Jesse lying flat on her back in the middle of her lawn.
“You okay?” Lexi ventured jovially.
Jesse breathed out audibly as she propped herself up on her elbows, her face completely flushed and dripping with sweat. “Long run,” she said by way of explanation.
“Yeah, how many miles? Or do you run for time?” Lexi stopped directly in front of her, seizing the opportunity to make any kind of idle chatter.
Jesse squinted one eye closed and bobbled her head back and forth. “Neither really. I’m working on some stuff for a new case and I just needed to get out of my head a little.” She leaned forward and a floppy brown curl fell to her forehead. “I guess I did around five miles or so, but I didn’t realize how hot it was.”
“This weather is crazy, huh?”
“I love it though. Give me the heat. I’m a summer girl,” Jesse said with a shift of her eyebrows. “It probably helped the whole Save Tabitha’s effort. This place is a ghost town. I guess everyone’s up there.”
“I know.” Lexi nodded and looked around as though she was checking the validity of Jesse’s statement.
“I’m actually surprised you’re here. How come you didn’t go with Meg and those guys?”
Lexi tried not to give too much weight to the fact that Jesse had considered her plans. “A bunch of reasons, really,” Lexi started, and then decided that Jesse didn’t really need to know all of them. Providing a partial truth she stated, “My family went to Vermont to see my grandmother this weekend. I have finals to get ready for.” She wound the leash around her wrist reflexively. “I would have felt bad not going to see my Nan, but then going to P-town instead. So I decided to stay home, do some schoolwork. Take care of old Butter here.” She patted the dog’s side, hoping that her answer sufficed. “What about you? What’s your excuse?”
“Work.”
Jesse leaned forward and began to stand up, brushing off the blades of grass stuck to her shins. It occurred to Lexi that she should move on at this point, continue to her house since their conversation was clearly winding down.
“What are you doing for dinner?” Jesse asked.
Lexi froze, completely blindsided by the invitation.
If she noticed Lexi’s shock, Jesse didn’t show it. “Why don’t you come over? We’ll order a pizza. Give you a break from your studies. I’ll take a break from my briefs. Since it seems we’re the only ones here, we might as well hang out together.” Jesse casually lifted up the bottom of her shirt and wiped the sweat from her forehead with it, revealing glistening washboard abs.
Lexi maintained her composure, just barely. She forcibly tore her eyes from Jesse’s bare stomach, willed her gaping mouth to close, and answered as calmly and nonchalantly as she could. “Yeah, okay. I could do that.”
“Great. Come by around seven. That’ll give me a chance to get some work done and obviously take a shower.” She fanned over her body with one hand as she said the last part as if she was not the perfect specimen that Lexi had been drooling over her entire life. As she backed away toward her front door, Lexi thought she saw Jesse wink as she said, “See you in a little while.”
*
Three hours later, Lexi stood on Jesse’s doorstep, dressed in cutoffs and a T-shirt, her hands stuffed into the pockets of her unzipped hoodie. She had fussed over her appearance for the last 180 minutes, primarily concerned with what to wear. The night was still warm, so she figured she could pull off shorts and flip-flops, a look she knew worked for her. Even though she was short, she had nicely defined legs from years of running. Plus the weather had been awesome lately, so she even had a slight tan going on. With it she’d paired a distinctly weathered tee that hugged her in all the right places, highlighting her curves. She hoped it reinforced the irresistible-without-even-trying look she was going for. After all, this was just a break in their respective busy schedules. Not quite a work dinner, but certainly not a date. She reminded herself of that a thousand times. Gathering up all her courage and resolve with one last deep breath, she knocked on the door.
Jesse held the door open and Lexi deliberately avoided looking at Jesse’s exposed collarbone, which protruded from the V-neck of her perfectly broken-in T-shirt. She did a quick scan of the house as she followed Jesse into the kitchen and couldn’t help but notice how different this place was from both Meg’s and Julie’s. Of course the layout was the same, but in its decor and its design it was light years ahead of the other two. It was modernly decorated, not overdone, but with quality furnishings. In contrast, Julie’s place always felt like a frat house while Meg’s didn’t quite have the lived-in feel yet. But this was a home. Adult. Modern. Tasteful. Refined. Very, very Jesse.
Seeing that Jesse was already halfway through a Sierra Nevada, Lexi accepted her offer of one without hesitation. Jesse popped the top off and handed it over. “Have you heard from Lucy Weston at all?”
From her seat at the table Lexi crinkled her brow and shook her head, taking a quick sip of the cold beverage. “No, why?”
“No reason. I just thought…I don’t know. You two seemed to connect. I thought she might reach out to you.” Jesse’s voice trailed, kind of dismissing her own comments, but then she continued. “I think about her a lot. Worry about her, I guess. She seemed kind of lost, you know? I hope she’s okay.”
It wasn’t that Lexi thought that Jesse was unfeeling or cold. But still she was touched to hear Jesse’s continued concern for someone who was simply a client—a past client at that. “Well, if anything, you helped her get the best deal from a pretty terrible situation.”
“I guess.” Jesse shrugged. “But money isn’t everything, and she didn’t get that much anyway. She’ll need to figure out what she’s going to do. She’ll never be a cop again. I think that sort of defined her. Plus, you saw her with her girlfriend the day she came in to sign.” She raised her eyebrows dramatically. “Things are not good there.” Jesse took a long swig from her drink and leaned back against the granite counter, placing the empty bottle next to her.
“I know. You’re right about that,” Lexi agreed. They hadn’t discussed it at the time, but Lexi had sensed it too. “But maybe it’s for the best. You know, we don’t really know what their relationship was like. Obviously there were problems—I mean, Lucy was cheating. Maybe they just aren’t meant to be. Who knows, maybe this is what needed to happen for them to see that.”
Jesse’s smile reached all the way up to her eyes. “That’s what I like about you, Lex. Smart, savvy lawyer one minute. Complete romantic the next. It’s adorable.” Jesse locked eyes with Lexi for so long that Lexi felt her heart bottom out completely.
Somehow she found her voice. “Hey, it’s not just me. Apparently you’re up nights worrying about her.”
“Not really. I just hope she lands on her feet.”
“Me too. She will though.” Lexi absolutely believed it.
“See what I mean, ever the optimist.” Jesse grabbed two more beers and opened them, passing one to Lexi as she took the seat across from her.
“Listen, I’m not always so upbeat. I basically didn’t go up for Save Tabitha’s because I felt like I would ruin the weekend for everybody. And I was pretty much dying to go. I love P-town and I haven’t been there in forever, and I’ve never been to the bars there or anything because I’ve always gone with my family. But I was so nervous that my going would make everything uncomfortable that I stayed home.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Meg and Sam, my best friend from—”
“I know who Sam is.” Jesse cut her off, a look of concern growing on her gorgeous face.
“Well, they rented a house with my ex-girlfriend and some of her friends. Originally I was planning on going too. See Julie, my ex, and I are trying to be friends.” Lexi half wondered why she was talking about this, but continued anyway. “But it’s hard. I knew something messed-up would happen if I went. Even though I can’t think of anything more fun than P-town with Meg and Sam.” She puckered her lips and gave a flippant sigh. “So I didn’t really bring my glorious optimism to that situation.” Lexi took a sip of her drink. She still wasn’t sure why she was telling Jesse all this, but it felt good to get it out. And strangely not uncomfortable at all.
“What do you think would have happened if you went? With you and Julie—would you fight, hook up? Both?” Jesse asked, curiosity steeped in her raspy voice.
Lexi huffed into her drink. “Definitely not hook up.” She ran her middle finger up and down the side of her beer, flattening the drops of moisture as they beaded up on the bottle. “I think that’s the problem. We had been getting along fine. But the past few weeks, we’ll be talking or joking about something and it’s all normal. At least I think it is.” Lexi worried her bottom lip. “But then I’ll look at her and she has this look.” She shook her head. “I don’t know. I can’t describe it.” She worried that she was talking too much, but Jesse seemed not to mind. “I guess I’m just afraid she’s still holding out hope for us, and I’m not. I just want to be friends. That’s it.” Lexi paused for a second and then added, “I hope you don’t think that I’m obnoxious or totally vain or anything. I realize how I must sound.”
Jesse lowered her brow and looked at Lexi with sincerity. “Not at all. First of all, I know you. I know you’re not vain or obnoxious. I pretty much just finished telling you how sweet I think you are.”
Lexi breezed past the comment, primarily because she didn’t have the time to deconstruct what it could mean. She pressed on with her story. “The thing is, after she gives me the look and I don’t respond, she totally turns on me. She can be pretty nasty when she’s drinking. Then we end up fighting. It becomes a whole scene, just kind of takes over everything.” She took a sip of her beer, licking her lips. “And for some reason I can’t understand at all, Sam totally sides with Julie every time we argue. And Meg will be with Mia, so I didn’t want to get in the way of that.”
Jesse hung her head in mock disgust. “Don’t get me started on that ridiculous relationship.”
“What, you don’t like Mia?” Lexi smiled. She already knew the answer.
“No, Mia is fine. I don’t like Mia for Meg. Meg can do better and she should. And I tell her that every chance I get. You should do the same. She’ll listen to one of us sooner or later.”
Lexi laughed at Jesse’s boldness in being absolutely certain that she knew what was best for Meg. She really did sound like she was looking out for her kid sister.
“Listen, it sounds to me like you made the right decision. In not going.” Jesse stopped for a second. “And in ending your relationship. I know it sucks, particularly when you want to be friends with someone and they want more. Never really works out.”
