The Show Must Go On, page 6
“What? You couldn’t stand to be around me any longer?” His tone was sharper than he meant, but he couldn’t help it.
“Of course not.” A crinkle formed between her brows. “I just had so many things to do.”
“So, you were too busy to answer your phone or the million texts I sent?”
She just stood there, biting her lower lip.
He stepped closer, even though he knew he should back off, unable to forget about that hot, sexy kiss, even though it was apparent she had.
“Maybe you’re afraid of what we might have done together. Or was our kiss so terrible you couldn’t wait to get away?”
Stepping back, she said, “No, of course not. The kiss was nice, but it should never have happened.”
“Nice?” He spat out the word. Is that all she could say? She had melted into his arms and kissed him back like she wanted him too. Now all she would say is it was nice?
She straightened. “Look, it was just a kiss between friends, nothing more. Just drop it. Okay?”
Rob considered kissing her, right there and right then. Show her just how nice a kiss between them could be. He almost did too, until her nervousness finally registered with him. He knew he needed to back off a little and give her some room to think. And he didn’t want to frighten her. “Fine.” Running his hand through his hair, he said, “Consider it dropped.”
Natalia practically ran from the room as he stood and watched. Shit. He hadn’t meant to be quite so aggressive. He kept upsetting her but all he wanted was for her to at least consider a deeper relationship with him.
Natalia
Tuesday 1/3
THE NEXT DAY, NATALIA sat in front of a piano at the store thinking about Rob. She didn’t have a lesson to give for a while, so she was playing one of the songs he had written. The boss didn’t seem to mind as long as she provided polite and responsive assistance to the customers and the tutoring wasn’t delayed. She was lost in thought when a coworker ran over to her.
“Nat, I just heard something awful. There’s been a shooting at one of the restaurants near Church Street Station, Tierra y Mar. Doesn’t one of your friends work there?”
Natalia’s head jerked up as fear tightened her chest. Was Rob working today? Was he okay? She grabbed her phone and placed a call to him. It went directly to voicemail. Without thinking, she leaped from her seat and asked her friend to let the boss know she would be gone for a while.
Hurrying to her Jeep and setting off for downtown Orlando. Natalia tried to reach Rob two more times, but he didn’t answer. She arrived at the restaurant in record time and parked as close as she could. A crowd had formed, and she elbowed her way through. Some obnoxious guy catcalled her, but she ignored him. She had something more important on her mind.
As she drew near, a police officer stopped her.
“A friend of mine works here. Is he okay?”
“I’m sorry, miss. We’re not giving out information at this time.”
The officer escorted her back behind the yellow crime scene tape that another officer had just finished placing. Immediately, the crowd swallowed her up. She worked her way out and stood staring at the restaurant. Wringing her hands, she waited for some news. Tears dripped from her eyes.
She stood for what felt like an eternity then felt someone touch her shoulder. Turning, she saw Rob. She launched herself at him, threw her arms around his neck and held on tightly. His arms came around her, and he rubbed her back. When she felt marginally better, she released him.
“Are you okay? I was afraid it might have been you that had been shot.”
“I traded shifts with someone.”
Her heart stopped pounding quite so loudly, and she said, “Why didn’t you answer your phone?”
“It’s broken.”
With a great sigh of relief, she said, “Oh. I’m just glad you’re okay.”
“I’m fine.” He smiled then walked back to her car with her. “I’ll call you later when you’re home from work.”
Natalia
Thursday 1/5
THE BAND HAD PLANNED to practice on Thursday, and Natalia knew she couldn’t avoid Rob. Ever since the shooting at the restaurant, her mind had been focused on him. She didn’t know what to expect. And with Jake’s arrival imminent, she didn’t know what to do. For the first time ever, she dreaded practice, but she still arrived on time. She walked in and said hello to the guys in general. She even mustered the courage to say hello to Rob, but he only responded with a grunt. He must be upset with her again.
She glanced at him now. He sat in brooding silence with his head downcast. She hated the tension between them since they kissed but didn’t know what to do, so she just sat and adjusted the settings on her Moog Sub 37 synthesizer. She absentmindedly watched as Eric pounded away on his Pearl EXX725S/C 5-Piece Export New Fusion drum set and practiced throwing the sticks in the air, then catching them.
Shaking her head at him, she said, “Doesn’t every drummer need to learn that?” She loved kidding around with Eric.
With an arch of his eyebrow and a playful glint in his eye, he said, “Smart-ass.”
Natalia gave him a stern look, trying hard not to smile.
Grabbing his towel, he flung it at Natalia.
She grinned, ducking as the towel flew by and hit the wall. “You missed.”
Eric laughed and went back to throwing his sticks, and Natalia plugged in the headphones into her synthesizer to practice a new song. She had been working on a particularly tricky instrumental solo and wanted to practice it until she got it right.
When Val arrived, Andrew called practice. They worked through their old songs and the new song Rob had written, tweaking them until they were happy with the sound.
When rehearsal was over, Eric caught Natalia before she left. “What’s up with Rob? He seems mad today.”
She shrugged. “Who knows.” She knew he was upset over her reaction to their kiss. They had definitely pushed him to the edge. It had put her on edge too. Just thinking about it made her feel hot and uncomfortable but she wasn’t sure she wanted to spread that news to anyone just yet.
Eric spoke, interrupting her thoughts. “Never mind him. I have a joke for you. How can you tell when a singer is at your front door?”
“I don’t know.” Natalia smiled
“She forgot the key and doesn’t know when to come in.”
“Hmm.” She speared him with a look that promised retribution. “What does the average drummer get on an IQ test?”
Eric shook his head.
“Drool.”
Grinning, he grabbed his things and nudged her with his shoulder. “See ya.”
Natalia nodded then began to gather her equipment. Maybe she should speak with Rob, but what could she say? Still, she could soften the blow, reaffirm that they were still friends. She wavered back and forth about what she wanted to do, then she noticed Andrew had pulled Rob into another room. She turned to leave but stopped when she heard their angry voices. Rob could be emotional and sensitive at times, but Andrew was always the composed, sensible one. Both seemed upset.
She tapped her fingers on the wall as she leaned against it, wondering if she should interrupt. Hoping to smooth over whatever the issue was, she walked into the room and froze.
“I don’t need this crap from you. I should just get the hell out of here and never come back.” In Andrew’s face, Rob continued. “I don’t need you. I don’t need this.”
Andrew started to answer, but Rob pushed past Natalia and strode out of the room, refusing to listen anymore.
Natalia stood in silence and shivered. Did he mean what he said? He had complained before, but he had never threatened to leave. She always thought this band would beat the odds and make it. She always thought the band members were partners, particularly Rob and her, and together they would be successful. Now he had introduced doubt into her mind. Maybe she should go after him. Or should she let him cool off? Natalia turned to Andrew. “What’s wrong?”
“Oh, he’s just mad that I called him on his behavior.” Andrew shook his head in apparent aggravation. “He’s been such a pain lately. He’s lazy. He’s always late. He doesn’t like anyone’s suggestions. He doesn’t want to listen to anyone’s ideas for songs.”
Natalia frowned. “Don’t you think that’s a bit harsh?
“Don’t worry. He’ll get over it.”
Unable to stop fretting, she grabbed her things and took off, hoping to catch up with Rob. Luckily, she found him sitting in his car with the top down, staring at the steering wheel. Walking over to his car, the scowl on his face silenced her momentarily. Then, leaning her hip against the side of his car, she said, “Are you okay?”
He ran his hand through his hair. “Yeah, I’m just irritated.”
Natalia watched him for a long moment. She noticed he had unbuttoned his shirt, making his tee-shirt visible. 333 I’m Only Half Evil. She decided to try a bit of humor to break the tension. “You know we wouldn’t make it without you. You’re a necessary evil.” She paused for effect. “Oh, forgive me, half evil.”
Rob looked up at her, and a grin soon appeared. “I am a necessary evil, aren’t I?”
Natalia smiled.
“Do you have some time? Let’s get something to eat.”
Natalia hesitated. She wouldn’t have before, but now she wasn’t sure if she should spend time alone with him. The kiss seemed to have changed things. Now, everything was a little off, not quite right. But after studying his face, she decided being together in public was safe enough. “Okay. Let me put my stuff in my Jeep.”
Rob helped her pack her equipment into her old forest green Jeep Wrangler, then she followed him to a nearby restaurant. Once they had a seat, Rob turned morose. “Lately, Andrew has been all over me like stink on shit.”
Natalia smiled and shook her head at his colorful phrase.
“Why does everyone do me the way they do?”
Natalia gazed at him a moment before she replied. “You mean, why do you get so much grief from people?”
“Yeah.” He drummed his fingers on the table as he looked down.
“Hmm.” Because you’re unreliable, because you’re lazy, because you’re highly emotional. Natalia didn’t want to voice her silent answers. She knew Rob wouldn’t want to hear them, not when he was out of sorts like this. Perhaps another time. Anyway, he wasn’t all bad. She reminded herself of his good traits. He was smart, warm, generous, talented. She wanted to be supportive, say something a friend would expect from a friend.
“Tell me what’s bothering you.” She silenced his fingers and gazed at him.
Scowling, he said, “I’m so damn frustrated. The band seems to be going in too many directions at one time. Nobody listens to me. Andrew is always tearing my lyrics apart.” He shook his head. “I’m beginning to wonder if it’s worth it anymore. Maybe I don’t have it in me to do this.”
Natalia felt a sinking in the pit of her stomach. She really didn’t want the band to break up. “Are you serious?”
He shrugged.
She hesitated for a long moment but had to ask. “Do you still want to do this? Do you still want to be part of the band? Or do you want us to go our separate ways?”
Rob tapped his fingers on the table again as he thought. “I want the band to stay together.”
“Then why did you threaten to leave?”
He sat back in the seat. “I don’t know.”
Things had been difficult for the band in the last few months. They didn’t currently have a regular gig. And the rejection from Blue Crab Records made their lack of success so much more difficult to handle. She decided to be positive. “We’re all frustrated that the band doesn’t seem to be getting anywhere. Things aren’t always easy, but we have to work together. We’re still working on our sound.” She smiled at him. “You’re an amazingly talented songwriter. And singer. You’re so good and getting better all the time. We just need to keep working. We’ll get there.”
Rob’s gaze focused on Natalia and his expression softened. “You’re so generous with your time and your talent and your ideas. You always support me. You’re always on my side.”
Seeing the Rob she knew and understood return, she smiled. Maybe they could weather the problems with the band. But could they get past the kiss and the disturbing feelings it provoked? Now she started rapping her fingers on the table.
“Nat, you know there’s something else we need to talk about.”
Startled, she glanced at him and wondered if he had read her mind. “The kiss on New Year’s Eve.”
“Yeah.” He paused. “You know it meant something to both of us.” He looked at her, and she could see deep sincerity in his eyes.
Natalia realized she had to face the truth. “You’re right. It did mean something. What...I don’t know. But I’m with Jake. I can’t pursue anything with you.”
Rob frowned. “Jake’s not here. I am.”
Fidgeting, she said, “He’ll be here on Saturday.”
With a scowl, Rob said, “He’s never around for you. What do you see in him?”
Natalia’s eyes met Rob’s. She felt it was best to be honest with him, even if it caused some discomfort now. That was better than causing great pain later. “I care about him.”
“More than me?”
Her heart sank. She hadn’t expected that question. “That question isn’t fair. I care about you as a friend. I care about Jake differently.”
Rob looked down at his clenched hands, then slowly, his eyes met hers. “Nat, I don’t know if I can do just friends anymore.”
Tears formed in Natalia’s eyes at the lost expression on Rob’s face. “Please don’t say that.” What would she do if she lost his friendship?
“Would you be willing to consider something more with me?”
“What about Jake?”
“Screw Jake. We’re good together, Nat. You know it’s true.”
His words frightened her. She knew he was just too much like Joey. They could never be together.
Rob sat for a moment then said, “Don’t you wonder what it would be like for us, if we did more than just kiss?”
Natalia shifted in her seat.
“It could be good, Nat. Damn, it could be wonderful.”
His words were starting to chip away at her resolve. She needed to get out of there, now. “I can’t do this. I need to go home.”
Rob’s jaw tightened then with a scowl he nodded, grabbed the check, and rose from the booth. “Okay, Nat. I’ll give you time. But remember that I can’t wait forever.”
They noticed the song playing overhead.
“‘Slip Slidin’ Away’ by Paul Simon,” Natalia said.
Rob answered. “Nineteen seventy-seven. Columbia Records.”
They gazed at each other, and she couldn’t help but wonder if everything good in her life was slip sliding away from her.
Chapter 4
Natalia
Saturday 1/7
Natalia wandered around her spotless apartment on Saturday afternoon, fidgeting with her hair and wondering why time was moving so slowly. Between the anxiety over the way things were with Rob and excitement over Jake’s upcoming visit, she hadn’t been able to settle herself. She expected Jake in a few hours. Thank goodness the band didn’t have a show that night. That was one less worry.
Two months had passed since Jake’s last visit, and although they spoke once a week on the phone, she still missed him. Sometimes, she wondered why she had let him talk her into a long-distance relationship, but whenever she saw him again, she always remembered. He was smart, charming, and ambitious and he said he loved her. She loved him too.
Even with Jake’s imminent arrival, she found she couldn’t stop thinking about Rob. In the last two days, she thought endlessly about what he had said. He hadn’t called her, and she wondered if he was giving her time to think. Or maybe she had hurt him, and he didn’t want to talk to her. She hated that thought. She never wanted to cause him any pain.
Glancing at her phone for the time, she realized she needed to leave to get to the airport on time. She hurried to her Jeep. She arrived a few minutes early but didn’t have to wait long. The plane from L.A. landed on time. The passengers soon began to stream past security and into the terminal. Sidestepping the boisterous tourists, she searched for Jake. She saw him first. He stood out in a crowd.
For a moment, she just gazed at him. He stood as tall as Rob, but the resemblance ended there. Jake Masterson had short, wavy, black hair and dark, chocolate-brown eyes in contrast to Rob’s fair coloring. He was big and broad; Rob was sleek and slim. Both men were handsome, but Jake seemed more rugged, Rob more sensitive. Add Jake’s macho appeal to his sexy Australian accent, his sense of style, his confidence, and almost any woman would notice him.
Today, he looked cool and stylish in a dress shirt, stone-washed jeans, and oxfords. She waved her hand as she moved through the crowd. He saw her only moments later and strode toward her. They met, and he swept her into his arms.
“I’m happy to see you, love. I thought I’d be in the customs queue forever.”
“It’s good to see you too,” she said as he pulled her close. He bent to kiss her. Holding her close, she immediately thought of the kiss she had shared with Rob. With him, she overheated and her brain short circuited. With Jake, she just felt warm and safe.
Then he grasped her hands and stepped back to study her. “You’re beautiful.” He cocked his head. “Though it looks like you’ve put on a few kilos.”
Natalia frowned. Why would he make a comment like that? Jake knew she worried about her weight, and criticism didn’t help. She tried to think of an appropriate response, but nothing came to mind.
As if he had forgotten his unkind statement, he placed his arm around her. “So, did you have a good New Year’s Eve? I tried to ring you.”
Natalia took a deep breath. Just ignore the weight comment. “I was at Jennifer’s party. And, yes, I had fun. But I’m glad you’re here. I missed you.” She thought of Rob again and wondered if she should confess to Jake that they had kissed. “The kiss.” That is what she and Rob now called that kiss that had changed everything, like it had a life of its own. She took a deep breath and banished that thought for the time being.
