The Show Must Go On, page 10
Jen studied him for several moments and said, “That’s a hard question to answer. Let me think.” She paused, then continued. “I’m guessing it’s a persistence versus stalking kind of thing. I mean, good persistence seems something like letting her know you care about her, understanding she’s reluctant but giving her time to understand what you want and figure out what she wants, and you taking opportunities to impress her and show your good qualities and sincere feelings.”
Rob nodded. That sounded reasonable.
“I think persistence is much more questionable when a guy won’t take no for an answer. He harasses the woman. He torments her. He has some kind of delusion that he just needs to show her how good they would be together.”
Damn. That hit too close for comfort.
“I think stalking is more threatening and subversive. The girl may not even know the guy. She may have rejected him and thought it was all over. I think it includes spying, gathering information about her without her knowledge or consent, tracking her movements, like a predator and prey, so he can eventually meet or attack.” Jennifer looked into Rob’s eyes. “I know you genuinely love Natalia. And I know you would never hurt her. To be honest, I think she loves you too.”
“Jen, I’m not sure I can just drop this and forget about Nat. I love her so much.”
“Then you should probably keep trying.”
Natalia
Friday 1/13
ON FRIDAY MORNING, Jake swept Natalia off her feet and into her Jeep without explanation. Driving along I-4 West, she tried to guess where they were going. When Jake finally pulled into the parking lot of Sea World she smiled. She loved animals. She didn’t get much of a chance to do touristy things, so she thought this would be fun. They walked around for a while then Jake led her to the penguin exhibit.
“I got tickets for us for the penguin encounter.”
“Oh! That sounds great.”
They joined the group. Learning about the birds was fascinating and she even got to pet one. His name was Luigi. Jake took a picture of them together and she hugged Jake out of sheer joy.
They spent several hours at the park but finally decided they were hungry.
“Talia, you look tired. How about I drop you off at your apartment and get takeaway for us. I can go to that Chinese restaurant you like.”
She smiled. “That sounds good.”
On the drive back to her apartment, Jake said, “I’ll bet you didn’t know there are penguins in Oz.”
“Really? I had no idea.”
“They’re called little penguins and they’re in Melbourne. I want to go to the finals of the Australian Open tennis tournament when we get back to Australia. Maybe we can fit in a quick trip to see some penguins.”
“I’d like that.”
When they arrived at Natalia’s place, Jake stopped, and she hopped out. She walked to her door and found a large damp package. She picked it up and carried into the kitchen. Flowers. She stood and stared at the vase of pink lilies, nestled with wispy fern and delicate baby’s breath. What should she do now? She read the card again. I love you. Please give us a chance. She needed to think. She obviously couldn’t keep them. But what should she do?
She heard a knock. Jake had a key so it wouldn’t be him. Pulling the door open, she found Rob. She was not at all surprised to see him. The pleased look on his face didn’t surprise her either. Thank God Jake wasn’t there yet.
He walked into her apartment without invitation. She read his shirt. You’ll Do. Nice. Not.
He glanced across the room. “You got the flowers.”
Natalia stuffed the card from the bouquet into her pocket. “Yes. They’re gorgeous. You shouldn’t have sent them.”
With a slow, sexy smile and a sparkle in his eye he said, “I want to apologize for upsetting you on Wednesday night.”
She studied him. How could he be so sweet and charming one minute, then so annoying the next?
“I know you like lilies better than roses, Natalia Lily.”
Why would he think flowers would solve the problem? They were beautiful, though. Afraid he might see something in her eyes to betray her she turned and walked into the kitchen. She took two bottles of water from the refrigerator and when she finally had control of her expression, she turned back to him and handed him a bottle. Anxious to find some way to make him leave, she said, “I’m sorry. I was getting ready to go out.”
Ignoring her words, Rob stepped closer to her. “I want to explain my feelings for you.”
She stumbled back a step. “Rob, I already know. Don’t do this.”
He took another step toward her. “I want you to change your mind about us.”
She stepped back again. “I know you do, but I can’t.”
“Why can’t you?” Rob stepped closer as he pressed for an answer.
Backed against the edge of the kitchen counter, she dropped her bottle of water. Bracing herself against the counter, she said, ‘I’ve made my decision. Please, just accept it.”
“So, you’re really going to go through with this?” His voice shook but he didn’t care.
“Yes.”
He frowned at her. “And how do you explain your reaction to me? When I touch you? When we kiss? How would you explain that to Jake?”
Natalia tensed. Rob seemed so upset, but she knew her own muddled feelings might be the real danger. “It’s just physical attraction, nothing more.” She quivered, despite her best effort to remain steady.
As he flung his water bottle into the sink he said, “No, damn it, it is something more.”
She stared up at him in silence. What should she say that she hadn’t already said?
He took a deep breath then placed his arms on either side of her and grasped the counter. “So, you don’t care that I love you, that I want you in my life.”
Questions swirled in her mind. “You’ve never said you loved me before. Why now? Was it because Jake proposed?”
Rob paused, closed his eyes, and let out a slow breath. “I think I’ve loved you since the day we met.” He smiled. “We’ve always had a connection. I just didn’t realize how strong the connection was, or how much I felt for you until I saw it slipping away.”
His words took Natalia’s breath away, but she wouldn’t let it change her mind about Jake.
“I don’t want to hurt you, but I made a promise to Jake.” She stood her ground and reminded herself that she had made the right choice. Rob hadn’t offered her any promises and even if he did, she couldn’t act on them. He just wasn’t the type of man she wanted to marry. She wouldn’t let doubt creep into her mind. “You’re just concerned about me, like you would be about any friend. You’re just confused right now.”
“I am not confused.” His expression clouded as he ground out the words. “I think we should give our relationship a chance.”
“A chance? You know as well as I do, you’re not ready to get married.” Natalia’s hand flew up to cover her mouth. Now, where did that stupid comment come from? Surely the mention of marriage would send him running.
He scowled. “How do you know what I’m ready or not ready to do?”
“Now, wait a minute. It hasn’t been that long since you and Christina broke up, and you said then you didn’t even want to think about marriage.”
His eyes flashed at her. “Christina has nothing to do with this. This is between you and me.”
She watched him for a long moment. “Rob, this is crazy. It would be so much easier to accept that I’m marrying Jake.”
He jerked away from her. “Fine, twist the knife a little more,” he spat out.
Natalia took a deep breath. “I think we’re both getting way too upset.” She was amazed at how cool she sounded when her heart pounded so hard, she could hear it in her ears.
“You’re damn right, I’m upset. What’s wrong with me? Why is it so hard to love me?”
His words tore at her heart. Refusing him over and over was so painful. “There’s nothing wrong with you.” She touched him, even though she knew she should step back. “I really care about you. But we’re just not right for each other. You’re too much like...” She came to a shuddering halt. The direction of this conversation had become much too overwhelming.
“Too much like what?”
She had almost said it. Too much like Joey. Her heart pounded an unsteady beat. She couldn’t be with a man like her former boyfriend. This time it would surely kill her. She darted away from Rob. “I can’t do this.”
Rob followed her to the front door. “What’s going on, Nat?”
“Nothing. You need to leave now. I can’t spend any more time alone with you. I don’t want you to think I’m leading you on, and I’m not going to cheat on my fiancé.” Natalia’s breath came in shallow, quick gasps. Worried she was about to have another asthma attack, she pushed him out the door. “Goodbye, Rob.”
Thank God he finally left. She quickly decided to leave the flowers anonymously for her kind, elderly neighbor Mrs. Williams. She managed it before Jake returned.
Releasing a deep sigh, she plopped onto the sofa to wait for Jake. But thoughts of Rob still circled in her mind. They still had one show left to do. Heaven help her get through this.
Natalia
Saturday 1/14
JENNIFER FROWNED AT Natalia, who sat on the edge of her sofa. “I am not going to let you wear a dress you already own on your wedding day.” She shook her head. “I think you’re crazy to marry Jake, but if you’re going to do it, at least buy a new dress.”
“Yeah. You have to get something new.” Lakeisha nodded her head with conviction.
Marissa nodded and grasped Natalia’s arm. “We’re taking you out now to look for the dress.”
Natalia sighed. She really didn’t want to do this today, but her friends and her sister weren’t giving up.
They prodded her toward Jennifer’s car, and she sat in the front passenger seat. Her sister and Lakeisha sat in the back. With music playing on the radio and Jen’s infectious laugh, Natalia soon loosened up. But she had to make one thing clear.
“I don’t want an over-the-top, fancy confection of a dress. I want something fairly simple.”
“That’s not a very fun attitude,” Jen said, in her usual teasing way.
Natalia grimaced, but Marissa said, “We understand, no traditional bridal gown.”
“Right.”
At the first store, they found two pretty dresses that seem acceptable. One was pale pink, and the other was ivory. Marissa, Jennifer and Lakeisha made her try on both dresses, but neither seemed to be flattering. If she was being forced to buy a new dress, she wanted one that she loved, or at least looked good while wearing it.
They drove to another nearby store and found several more dresses that were quite pretty.
Natalia dutifully tried them all on, but none really appealed to her.
Undaunted, Jennifer drove to another store and found another dress, but it was another disappointment. Natalia’s head was beginning to spin from all the choices she had seen so far.
Sitting in the car as they went to yet another store, Natalia wished she was having a good time, but she wasn’t. What was the problem? She was with her wonderful sister and bubbly friends. She was shopping for a dress to wear on her wedding day. Wasn’t this supposed to be a happy time? Why did she feel so blue?
Their last stop was at a vintage clothing shop. Natalia felt drawn in, and within minutes she found exactly what she wanted.
Jennifer studied her as she modeled the dress. Natalia had chosen a simple yet elegant light-blue, silk, georgette dress with a draped neckline, fluttery sleeves, and an asymmetrical ruffled hem. “Blue just seems like the wrong color for the bride.”
Natalia considered her choice. She would have bought something in green, which was her favorite color, but she hadn’t seen anything in that color that seemed remotely appropriate. This dress did, and it matched her mood. “This is the one I want.”
“Well, it does look great on you,” said Lakeisha.
Marissa nodded.
Using her credit card, Natalia bought the dress. When Jen said they needed to find a hat, Natalia told her she had a hairclip that would do the job just fine.
“Nat, you must be the most difficult bride I’ve ever helped.”
Natalia heard the exasperation in her voice. She tried to summon up some enthusiasm, but it just wouldn’t come. “I’m sorry.”
“Oh, it’s okay.” Jennifer smiled. “Let’s go get a cup of coffee.”
At a nearby coffee shop, they sat with their brews. Natalia had a café mocha, Jennifer a vanilla latte, Lakeisha had a peppermint café Americano and Marissa a plain iced coffee.
Chatting for a while about Natalia’s upcoming wedding, Lakeisha blurted out, “I can’t believe you won’t let us throw a bridal shower for you. What is wrong with you, girl?”
Natalia knew Lakeisha and Jennifer were just disappointed, but she bristled under her question. “Come on. You know we have so little time to do it.”
“Excuses, excuses. I could pull it together in a flash.”
She grasped her friend’s arm. “Jen, I just don’t want one.”
Her friend sighed. “Okay.”
Natalia sat back. She didn’t want a bridal shower, or any other unnecessary attention focused on her upcoming wedding with Jake. Working up some enthusiasm for any celebratory activities was just too much for her. Could Rob be the cause of her discontentment?
Chapter 6
Natalia
Saturday 1/14
Natalia and the guys waited backstage for their turn at KC’s Battle of the Bands. This outdoor festival in downtown Orlando would be their last performance together. Natalia really didn’t want to be there. She had been trying to avoid Rob. She had not gone to practice since she last saw him three days ago. And what was the point in winning if she was leaving and RAVEN’s lineup changed? She took a deep breath. Shame on her. She needed to dig up a better attitude. If they won, it would certainly look good on the band’s press kit.
She stood and thought. As always, they planned to play their own songs. It had been difficult to get the guys to agree on the songs, but Natalia felt they had chosen their best. And they had spread the word to their fans. It was wonderful to see so many people wearing their RAVEN band tee-shirts.
She gazed at the bandmembers. They were trying a new look. Each wore a black shirt, black jeans and a raven mask. She wore a long, black, fluttery dress, black Victorian-style ankle boots and a raven mask. It had occurred to her that their look was really rather Goth, but they didn’t play that kind of music. Some contests judged a band on whether their on-stage look and attitude appeared suitable to their genre. She was afraid that RAVEN would get nailed on those criteria.
Suddenly their turn was called. They walked on-stage and up to the microphones. Andrew and Val held their guitars. Natalia and Eric would walk over to their instruments in a moment.
Rob spoke first. “Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there, wondering, fearing, doubting, dreaming dreams no mortal ever dared to dream before. Quoth the Raven.”
The band members responded. “Nevermore.”
They stepped back, removed their masks and dove right into their first song. Rob sang with enthusiasm, making sure to engage the audience and acknowledge as many of their fans as he could. He worked the stage from one side to the other. And he interacted with Andrew, Val, Eric and her too. And, best of all, the guys looked like they were having fun.
Natalia saw Jen in the first row. A few moments later, she saw Lakeisha. She noticed when Val realized Lakeisha was in the front row. He gave her their secret hand gesture and she returned it. Actually, it was more like not-so-secret. Natalia had noticed it before, and Lakeisha had spilled the beans about it when she was gushing over Val. A lot of times musicians lost interest quickly with their girlfriends. That certainly didn’t apply to Val. He was crazy about Lakeisha. Her edgy, often crabby friend was hooked. She sighed. The gesture was cute, but Jake didn’t do ‘cute.’
Natalia pulled her attention back to the show. The audience was on their feet and dancing. Rob sang all four songs this time although often Natalia sang one in these types of festivals. But she didn’t want to sing at this show. She was leaving and Rob needed the full opportunity to shine.
Their performance seemed to be finished in just a few moments. Natalia thought the band put on an exceptional show. She didn’t expect to win but gave her all in her last performance with RAVEN. Leaving that part of her life behind, even though she had much to look forward to, was going to be hard. She knew she would miss the guys terribly. She would miss Rob the most. She hoped her life and career in Australia would be enough to make up for all she would put aside when she married Jake. She sighed. He didn’t attend the concert. He was looking for a tuxedo and he had expensive taste, and a picky attitude.
She had seen Jennifer’s cousin, Zane, in the front row as the band performed, and as soon as their segment ended, she veered off in the opposite direction, hoping to avoid him and Rob, especially Rob. She really didn’t want him to corner her. Silly, really. All he had to do was come to her apartment if he wanted to see her. At that moment, she heard a knock on the door. She expected Rob, and his arrival didn’t surprise her.
“Where were you after the show? We needed you.” She stepped back, and he rushed into the room. “I have some news to tell you.”
Obviously, he was wound up about something.
“Nat, this is great. The agent you met at Jen’s party stopped by to see us. He seemed really excited by the band. He might be willing to take us on. He even made a point of saying he thought you and I were more talented than most he’s seen. Isn’t that great?”
Natalia’s hand came to her chest, and she stared at Rob. She couldn’t believe it. The agent expressed real interest in the band. She was thrilled until she remembered she was leaving. Her heart sank. Why did a break like that have to come now? Why couldn’t it have been before she agreed to marry Jake? She couldn’t stay with the band and marry Jake. Her chest tightened, and she sighed, trying to loosen it a bit. She loved Jake and had made a promise to him. She knew what she had to do, even if it killed her. Natalia took a deep breath and said, “That’s wonderful news. I’m sure he will want to take on the band. I wish I could be part of it.”
