City, Sister, Silver, page 13
Finally we came to what we’d thought was a town, but then we saw it was the ovens that they’d used to burn the Jews. There were bones an skeletons surrounding them too, we made sure we were extra careful when it came to children’s bones, cause they just snapped, an we would’ve broken through, since there was nothing else beneath us. Here at least we could grab hold of the ovens’ sturdy grating, an the walls were solid too, the bricks seemed almost new even, not a single crack. It probably would’ve been easy enough to trigger the mechanism, fire it up, but except for us there was nothing to feed it. We all sat down, sprawling out around the nearest oven, because this was the end. But then, feeling pain, we started to move around again, though only slowly and with great effort. An the source of our pain, my brothers, was the bones underneath us, cracking beneath the weight of our bodies, scratching an stabbing us. Mainly our thighs an elbows, but one or two of us even got a scratch on the face here an there … an the worst thing, brothers an gentlemen, was when one of us accidentally trampled … somebody’s fragile or rotten chest, an crushed the sternum an broke through, an the sharp thin ribs clamped shut on his foot like a trap … an the ashes of the dead got into our wounds … so we tried to wash them out with saliva, an then Bohler tore up his cassock an Shark Stein his byznys shirt, an we tried to bandage ourselves a little … an then we just sat there.
After a moment or two of oppressive silence, O brothers an buddies of mine, I decided I would try to pump up the conversation: From far away that chimney looks kina like a TV tower! Weird, huh? An one of you, O pseudodroogs an brothers, replied: Hm. An another one said politely: Yeah?
An then Bohler started shrieking an quick made the sign of the cross, an then we all saw it: there stood Death. The Grim Reaper. At first, I admit, I was slightly in awe: You mean that’s what he looks like? An I think the rest of you also recovered a little. At least now it was obvious why that crazy flying carpet had flown us all the way out here: to die. An Bohler got up an walked across the bones to Death an let loose, Iesous Christos Theu Ios Soter, an made the sign of the carp with a shinbone, I thought he’d finally flipped. Death didn’t say a word, just stood there looking at us through empty eye sockets. All that scythe stuff was bullshit, Micka whispered to me. With those claws who needs one, he added. I shuddered. Bohler came gloomily walking back an sank down on a bone next to me. What was that all about? I asked. That was the first Christian greeting from the days of the evil Roman catacombs, I was informed. He’d used it as a test, figuring Death’s old, he oughta at least know that. Next Bohler gave Latin a shot: Ora pro nobis … we all joined in, except Sharky, I noticed. But Death didn’t say a word. Just stood there. Then Shark Stein got up an said: Enough aready with the Christian cockamamie, this here’s my turf. My people were the ones killed here. Alla that old-time bastardized Greek an Latin doesn’t mean a thing here. An Sharky walks up to Death an goes: Shalom aleichem! an starts chanting, Shma Yizrael … an rocking back an forth … an jiggling all over his body … who’da guessed, I leaned over to Bohler. C’mon, he’s an old kibbutzer, Bohler whispered back … baptized. Sharky sang … whined, more like it … an Death just stood there. Disgraced an unhappy, Shark Stein walked back over to us an then turned around an told Death: Mazeltov! an he didn’t mean it sarcastically. But Death didn’t say a word. What do we do? whispered Micka. Nothin, said Bohler, leaning back against the grating. Wait. Like always.
But then Death took a step towards us, slow an hesitant like, an then another … an I felt like shouting: Move it aready, you blasted old swine! But I didn’t, an we began crossing ourselves, an David yelled out: Not to fear, boys, we lived by the contract! An when Death heard that, he pulled up short.
We heard a sort of hesitant cough. An then a voice, soft an raspy: Beg pardon, yer worships, but I was advised some young gents from the Czech Lands were here. So in case ya’d fancy a little tour … at cher service, Josef Novák’s ma name, sightseein’s ma game, heh.
I thought I was hallucinating, an when I looked around at the rest of you, O friends an chiefs, it was plain you were meeting with the same feelings as me.
Hey, said Sharky, when that skeleton talks, it opens its … mouth.
Course that’s only natural, said the skeleton.
So you’re dead? David went to the heart of the matter.
Yep, said the skeleton.
An you’re really Josef Novák?* Bohler said, giving Sharky a wink.
Am now, gentlemen, said the skeleton, course who I am … I am … as the sayin goes out our way in the wild blue yonder.
An you were baptized with the name …
Sure, said the skeleton, at that little church in Žižkov.* But if ya might fancy a little tour? See it’s gettin late, yer worships, though course out our way … wull, things’re a little diffrent.
Excuse me, Bohler said, but would you mind tellin me … you see … here … with a name like yours …
Oh that ole story, said Josef Novák the skeleton. That ole mixup. Yep, like that all of um were Jewz, yup? Most all of um. An a couple a Gypsies, briefly. Alla the gentlemen from the Czech Lands ask that one right off. Wull back under the Protectorate* I was workin this honky-tonk Mincík’s down on Wencie Square, an there was this dishslinger there name a Roubíček, an we had a little thing goin wid invoices, nowadays course I’m above it all, wull an the thing was some signatures for schnapps, up at the till an oud in the storeroom, I’d jus useda fill in for im when there was a need, ole Rouba he was in on it big time, I’d jus play the dummy when there was a need, so as ta get me a spot at the water hole, right, wull nowadays I’m above it all, the bag of bones rattled on, an one day I’m pullin the ole snotrag oudda my copacetic zoot suit an Kasal, that was this walleyed kid, posthumous child from our little Adinka, heart a gold on er, wull an this kid Kasal useda cover for us durin handoffs, I mean I’m tellin ya! An I didn’t notice cause a my snotrag but he’s goin nuts makin all these secret signs how we’re busted an the raid’s on the way, an was it ever, bingo! Wham bam thank ya ma’am that same day the Gestapo comes bustin in lookin for Roubíček, which that day was me, an I was expectin somethin, I mean it’s like I told ja before, contacts, deliveries, handoffs, crates an bottles an whatnot, wull nowadays I’m above it all, laugh right at it now, as Adinka* useda say, right, an they’re: Where’s Roubíček? An I’m: You’re lookin at im, pardners, there some kina problem? An them, course they’re Czechs, nowadays I’m above it all, they go: Yeah, you! An they gamee a bit of a brutalizin, never got a chance da say, hey I’m a good Czech too, straighten the whole mixup out wid em somehow, you scratch my back, right, that’s the fix, eh? Nowadays, wull, I laugh right at it. Wull an down at Gestapo HQ when they found out I wasn’t the wanted Semite Roubíček but some Josef Novák from Žižkov, temporarily employed as a blond barboy, which is ta say a dancer, an a highly sought-after escort to boot, wull nowadays I’m above it all, they were floored: Here we are huntin Jews an there’s Czechs goin around impersonatin um! Wull an off I went wid the first transport. Yep, otherwise it was nothin but Jewz here, all of um, yes siree.
And we just sat there, chiefs and brothers, quiet as mice, no longer feeling the pain from our wounds.
Wull then, yer worships, ring-a-ding-ding, let the tour begin! Ordinarily I’m advised ta awways start the gents off wit the ramp, but today, gentlemen, I … today, hm, anyway … things’re diffrent for us … it’s just that I got somethin ta do later on, so if ya don’t mind I’ll just give ya a little peek, right, yeh? Wull, silence gives consent, as ole Brychta useda say when he was coppin coins oudda farmers’ dampers on Coal Market Square, kapisch, pardners?
Over there then, the skeleton pointed to the sea of bones, that was the ramp an that’s where Mengele useda separate the wheat from the chaff’s how he put it. Over there, when the cattle car I was on pulled in, wull it’s all behind us now, there’s an incident from my first day goes wid that, when those Jew boyz see us fallin oudda the wagons, suffocatin ta death an dyin a thirst, they come flyin in there wid the whips, chop-chop everyone out, ess-ess’re standin behind um, wull an we go down the ramp an there’s Mengele an all the rest of um wearin these white lab coats, an he sees me an says: Now there’s a showpiece! an the whole hullabaloo stops on the spot an I strip down to my birthday suit an he takes this pointer an points an all the resta the docktors an ess-ess’re lookin an some brass band’s playin along in the background. An he says, course now I know what he said an I laugh right at it: Note here the typical degeneration of the cheekbones … an he like jabs me wid the pointer … the typical Jewish nose … the flattened palate … here we have Beelzebub’s hump … notice the striking size of the sex organ … proof of pervertedness … depravity … Wull hell, it tickled. An I donno hardly any German, jus the stuff the guards’re screamin, an what wid all those folks in the cattle car sobbin an moanin I figure they’re givin me some special welcome, like I’m some upper crust or somethin, which … now all that’s behind me, things’re diffrent out our way … I figured since all he’s tellin the rest of um is Rechts! an Links! an flippin his pointer back an forth. An so I raise my right hand an go: Heil Hitler, meine offizieren und docktoren an scholars. Ich bin eine kleine tschechische schweine, geboren aus Žižkov,* howdy do, Novák from Prague here. Greetins, everyone, an long live the Fiihrer an the Thousand-Year Reich! Hip hip hooray! An Mengele hears an turns all white an swishes his pointer, an the guards kick me inda the line for the gas, yep nowadays I’m above it all, but what wid the hubbub stoppin an restartin, the lines got all tangled up, an they start tearin dames’ kids away … confusion sets in … an the Jew boyz fly back in wid the whips, chop-chop dividin it up like … like, pardners, kapisch? … but they jus made an even bigger mess, an I’m down there floppin aroun in the mud an they’re at me wid the whips, wull I’m above it all now, an then this one kid kicks me back inda line, wull an that was the wheat line, nowadays, wull, I laugh right at it.
And suddenly I realized, brothers and skippers, I was walking behind Josef Novák the skeleton, and so were you, we were walking across the bones, but it was safe, just a little bit hard on the feet, like concrete. And the skeleton stopped and turned to us. Wull, pardners, that’s like how it was … and then he picked a bone up off the ground, a man’s shin, I think, and said: Fall in!
And all of us, brothers and buddies, obediently fell in line like it was some fuckin army drill.
Wull, pardners, Josef Novák the skeleton walked up to Micka: Let’s see yer teeth, swine! Heh heh, scared ja there, scoutie, he laughed, waving the bone. Rechts! Yer a strong fella, you’da gone on road detail. But watch it! That was ess-ess Bauch’s kommando, an he’da only been happy if you misbehaved, only real pleasure for him was breakin strong fellas. Nice an slow. There there, scoutie, what’s a matter? the skeleton stopped at Bohler and ran the bone over his rags. Cassock? That’s too bad, an yer a strong one too, but preacher men only got three days da live aroun here, kapisch? An then it was nach oven an I’m talkin ein zwei drei! Then Josef Novák the skeleton comes up to me and goes: Hey, scout, whatcha shakin for, ya sure yer not a touch meshuga? But then, noticing my slightly frazzled elbows and the minor permanent sprain in my left shoulder … he bent down and listened to the rhythm of my heels … and Josef Novák the skeleton tossed away the shinbone, threw his arms around me, and said: Colleagues, heh? And I went, yes … Mr. Novák. Wull, ya mighta been able da hop aroun the camp fancy house a while fore ya hopped cher way inda the oven. And then the skeleton passed Sharky and just snickered and let out a hoot: Wull that’s an obvious one, and then he stopped at David. You’re a pretty young good-lookin boy, I’d give ya the road, but if Oberst Prochaska gets a gander a ya, that’s yer tough luck. Wull, boys, alla ya’d, cept for this gent here, he said pointing to Sharky, end up, long as ya got cher paypers all shipshape down at the rathaus! the skeleton admonishingly lifted a bony finger, in an Aryan camp. Wull but it’s twelve a one an half a dozen a the other, as ole Vanecek said durin that blackjack game down at Kalenda’s when he lost the last thou he’d got for those horses he sold to Kropáček from Byteč an hadda dig the coins oudda his pockets, heh! Wull never mind, move it along, pardners. So over there ya got cher tattoos, pricky pricky, heh heh, wull nowadays I’m above it all, an how bout a little shortcut, we’ll jus swing over this hill, keep that spinnin top spinnin, keep those wheels from standin still! Wull then right here ya had jer gallows, yep, got used whenever someone misbehaved, or whenever they were empty … and, brothers and buddies, I took a few steps back because Bohler was kneeling there vomiting, and when he had nothing left to vomit then he began to choke, so I gave him a few manly kicks in the back …
Yep an when I got ta my digs those Jew boyz that plucked me oudda the gas let loose on me wit that gibberish a theirs … wull, pardners, you had me mixed up too, carryin on wid all that talk a yers at first, I was advised some young gentlemen from Prague were here, an I mean it’s like I told ja! How bout that sweet little mother of a hundred spires of ours … don’t cha go poopin yer you-know-whats now … how bout ole Fensterer, still got that butcher shop a his up on Klamovka, pardners? Just got it back, Micka reported dejectedly. Wull an those Jew boyz let loose on me, an when they found out I was no showcase Jew, or even an ordinary one, when they found out I was a mixup, I mean I told ja, goddammit! they kicked me oudda the barracks, wull nowadays I’m above it all. An the tour moves on, shake a leg, make it snappy, gotta keep the wifey happy, hey! Wull, pardners, this right here’s a good one, in spring of forty-three me an Broněk jumped this one ole Izzy an scarfed down his potatoes, wadn’t that a treat, yep, yep. An this right here’s where yer Jewish soap was made, as in out of um, yup, an so me an Broněk snatched some an plugged it to the Polaks, word was it kept the lice off, yep, yep, it’s all behind us now, swingin the lingo yet, pardners? Ya know you fellas talk funny, like some kina goody-goodies, ya sure yer from the little mother? Hey an right over here’s where they killed Bonn, Hanuš, yep, right over here by these stakes, told me bout it when we went fishin, yep, yep. Right here then ya had jer storehouses, boyz, right here ya had yer ess-ess canteen, yer fancy house, heh heh, an right here ya had jer offices, here’s where I’d useda see Poláček,* awways makin like he was in a rush fillin out forms for the transports, cross out one, put down another, yeah he was good, that ole Hebe, all it cost was a little margarine, yep … Enough! roared Bohler. We turned around and saw him standing behind us with Sharky, and Sharky started in again, shimmying all over the place and wailing in that voice that didn’t go with him at all, something like asmoel … yizgebal … oooeee … chayil … ay-ay-ee … shoah … ey-ey-eee … an Bohler stood next to him with a cross resourcefully fashioned out of two bones tied together with a strip of his cassock, roaring: Stand back, infernal power … diabolical delusion … unclean force … and as the two of them came walking down a path of bones toward us, I could almost feel the power of the warpath … but Novák the skeleton just laughed and said: Oh yeah, folderol, shenanigans, yep, gentlemen carry on all sortsa ways here, rollin aroun the ground, oh yeah, it’s got all kindsa diffrent effects, yep, yep, I’m aware a that … but … and the skeleton scratched his skull with the shinbone.
Look, Mr. … sir, said Micka. Whoever you are, whatever you want with us, where we come from every little kid knows that Poláček died in Terezín an he definitely never put anyone … any Jews, uhh, any people down for the transports, just the opposite, he saved em … for Chrissake, Micka, cheeks flushing, turned to Bohler, he was a writer! An Hanuš Bonn never left Terezín either! Sharky chimed in, tears rolling down his cheeks like peas. Yeah, I said, that’s where he wrote: Flamin crosses up in the sky an days undone with salty anguish … I suddenly remembered the song that She-Dog had told me. And Josef Novák the skeleton, seeming a little embarrassed, shuffled the bones of his feet in the sea of other bones, and said: Oh yeah, boyz, plenty a gentlemen lose their tempers durin the tours cause things’re a little diffrent out our way … than what ya got in those arkives an paypers an facts a yers, yep … An besides, there were no transports from here, this was a Death Camp! Sharky said furiously through his tears. Suddenly Novák the skeleton was next to him, patting him on the shoulder with that bone. I saw Sharky shudder, but he kept right on bawling and, O my brothers and chiefs, I was shaken because I’d never seen the tough, cruel Sharky sob with grief … like some helpless little kid … I was afraid we’d lost him … he wept and wept, and that normally razor-sharp face turned blurry … and the horror began to creep into my heart, I was scared … Novák the skeleton soothingly patted him on the shoulder, and said: Oh yeah, it’s a lot ta take for the Israelite gentlemen … but look at it this way, pardner, that in spite a what they had planned for alla ya, you grew up ta be a strong, good-lookin Jewish fella … an there’s lotsa you … an gorgeous Jewish girls … all over … An they failed … an you can kick their asses! Micka roared at Sharky … an we’ll help! he added, menacingly waving a bone … Amen! Bohler said in a resounding lion’s voice, and Sure, whatever it takes, I said somewhat unconvincingly. All right, scouts, we get these kina cases an outbursts all the time here, yes sir, now movin along … apropos, gents, this lager here wadn’t all that big … transports ran oudda here roun the clock … now yer genuwin lagers … yer death factories, those were unnerground … an don’t think there wasn’t lotsa heftlinks happy da be here, I mean I’m tellin ya! Right here in Auschwitz! But yer genuwin lagers the ess-ess kept hidden unnerground … in Russia … an those kindsa places … no one knows a hoot about them yet … all those paypers an rekerds an facts a yers! … Pff … Auschwitz wadn’t diddly! Baloney, roared the freshly outraged Sharky, why else would Jehovah have sent us here? What Jehovah, Bohler cried, tearing up what was left of his cassock, what Jehovah I ask! … it was Starry Bog … Whoever it was, pardners, guess he just felt like it … said Novák the skeleton, I dunno, I’m a little man, all this sendin stuff … yer here, yer here … and he added to himself: These edjumucated gentlemen, graddyates … awways pickin arguments … never stop stickin their two cents in …
