The Lunam Ceremony (Book One), page 7
The music energizes the couples. Drake and Leah dance, as well as Clio and Tripp. They all look so happy, so smitten. I wonder if Dillan and I look like that. I feel happy, content. I’m not as love-sick as I thought I would be. The physical attraction I feel for Dillan is obvious, but my heart and mind haven’t quite caught up.
“How are you two doing? Can I get you anything? We have cake.” Layla approaches tentatively. So unlike her.
“No ma’am, I’m fine.” Dillan reaches across the table for my hand and squeezes it. “Your daughter is taking great care of me.”
I’m appalled at Dillan’s statement to my mother. What does he mean I’m taking care of him? I pull my hand back, and Dillan’s smile falters slightly. I stand and pick up our plates, pretending my withdrawal wasn’t intentional. “We’re fine, Mom.”
Instead of putting the plates in the trash near the picnic tables, I carry them around the back of the building to the dumpster. I hear Layla’s footsteps behind me.
“What was that, Kalysia?”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” I toss the plates with more force than necessary.
I start to walk away, and Layla grabs my arm. “Is everything ok? I mean between you and Dillan?”
“Of course, why wouldn’t it be? He’s my match,” I say bitterly.
“You are getting along? I mean, um, everything is working out?”
Layla’s flustered way of asking if our sex is good makes me laugh. “Yes, Mom, everything is great” I laugh and Layla joins me. “He loves me.” I laugh even harder.
Layla stops laughing. “He told you he loved you?” Her brow furrows in disbelief.
I’m a little insulted that she would think I’m lying. “Why wouldn’t he love me? We are meant to be.” I don’t hide the sarcasm in my tone.
A small grin creeps onto Layla’s face.
“What?” Her reaction has me curious.
“He loves you, Kalysia,” she says with tears in her eyes and throws her arms around me.
Jessie calls Layla back to the kitchen, and I stay hidden by the dumpster, wondering why she is so happy to hear that a boy I just met thinks he’s in love with me. I don’t see the positive in that. It’s too soon. It can’t be love. It’s just Lunam. It’s so easy to get caught up in the moment. I mean, hell, it’s encouraged. The fact that I can see that leads me to believe Layla was right, as usual. I do have control.
“Kalysia?”
I spin around and see Cassie walking out of the forest. I run over and wrap my arms around her. “I was looking for you all day!” Well not all day. “I can’t wait to meet your match! Did you see who I paired with?” I feel a surge of pride that I get to call Dillan my match. The slightly tense moment that happened at the buffet table doesn’t seem all that important.
“Kalysia, stop!” she says loudly and pushes away from me.
Cassie’s eyes are red; it looks as if she’s been crying. “Are you ok? Did something happen? Was it Leah?”
“No, it wasn’t Leah,” she says quietly and looks at the ground.
“Did something happen with your match?”
“No, that’s just it. I didn’t make a match.” Cassie bursts into tears and falls into my arms.
She was standing right behind me. She walked through the smoke. “I don’t understand; didn’t you phase?” I ask her.
She slows her sobs to answer. “Yes, but I didn’t match with anyone. There is always a chance. I just didn’t think it would happen to me!”
“Is everything ok?” Dillan is suddenly by my side. “Are you injured?” His concern for Cassie pulls at my heart.
“No, she didn’t match,” I tell him quietly, even though I know Cassie can hear me.
Dillan’s face turns sad, and I want to kiss him for being so compassionate towards my friend.
“Are your parents here, Cassie?” I wonder if they were among the others at the ceremony last night.
“Her father is here,” Dillan says. I’m surprised he knows who she is. “Should I get him?”
“NO!” Cassie straightens up. When she realizes Dillan watching, her face turns another shade of red. “Please, I don’t want to see him right now. I suspect he knows, which is why he’s staying away.”
Tandy said parents can sense things about their children. Just like Layla knew to keep her distance earlier. Cassie’s father must feel the same way, but for other reasons, sad ones.
Cassie didn’t match at Lunam. What does this mean for her, her status in the pack? Two days ago, I would have loved to be in her shoes, but now, after being with Dillan, I’m not sure anymore. For someone like me, someone raised outside the pack, this would be a get-out-of-jail-free card, but for a girl like Cassie, it’s hell on earth. Cassie excuses herself to use the bathroom, leaving Dillan and I alone.
“I feel horrible.” I rest my head on Dillan’s chest. I’ve been in bed with the strongest male here, and my best friend has been outcast. “I should have known earlier; she’s been alone all day while we…”
Dillan wraps his arms around me and kisses my head. “This isn’t your fault. This happens in odd years; it’s a risk we all take.”
“Not for you, there were more than enough females to go around.”
“It’s not like that every time. There have been years when the odds were flipped,” Dillan says. “The packs submit their numbers the week before Lunam, so we know going in if it’s an odd year and whose favor it will be in, male or female. We’re all too vain to believe we aren’t strong enough to make a match.”
I wonder if I was on Sierra’s list. Maybe I tilted the odds. “Did you know I was coming?”
I search Dillan’s eyes for any hint of a lie. His reply is steadfast. “Yes, my father told me a pureblood female was going to be here. That’s you.” Dillan kisses my forehead. “You were meant to be here, don’t doubt yourself for a second. We belong together,” Dillan declares.
I breathe a bit easier, but I can’t stop thinking that if I wasn’t here, maybe Cassie would be matched. Then again, if I wasn’t here, Dillan would be matched with someone else. Murderous thoughts flash through my mind. I can’t imagine him with anyone but me. “What will happen to Cassie?”
“It depends on how her pack handles it. Her father will be upset; he might offer her to a low alpha in the hopes her children will have some hope to lead one day. Her life doesn’t have to be horrible, Kalysia. She comes from a strong family, she’ll be ok.” Dillan’s reassurance does little to soothe me.
I was still secretly hoping that she matched with a Sierra. The idea of moving away and starting a new pack was almost bearable when I thought she would be with me. “Isn’t there something we can do?” I plead. “I mean, what good is being a pureblood if we can’t throw a little weight around? Not just to get beer service.”
Dillan smirks at my comment. “What do you want me to do?”
“I want her to come with us,” I tell him. “Can’t she join our pack?”
Dillan shakes his head. “No, Kalysia. If you think her status will be bad at Shasta, it’s nothing compared to how she will be treated in a Sierra pack.”
“I’ll protect her.” I stand up tall as if I’m starting already, maybe I am. “I know she’ll always have my back. I need a friend like her right now. Please, Dillan, do this for me?” I tiptoe and kiss his neck.
“I’m in trouble,” he moans when I bite his earlobe.
“Why?”
Dillan kisses me hard on the mouth and pushes me up against the building wall. “Because I will never be able to say no to you, Kalysia. Because I’m madly in love with you.”
No, it’s too early.
I looked for Cassie last night to tell her the good news, but she had disappeared. To be honest, I didn’t look long, because Dillan pulled me back to his tent. Dillan isn’t the first boy I’ve slept with, but he is the first I enjoyed. We fit perfectly in so many ways. I can’t imagine being with anyone besides him. I don’t want to be with anyone else. I might not be in love yet, but I know there isn’t another man on earth that can make me feel the way he does.
When I woke this morning, Dillan was gone. He left a note saying he had to meet with the adults regarding our branch. The Sierra couples are headed to our new home in the Sierra Mountains. Dillan and I would normally go straight from Lunam to our new branch, but Dillan’s father wasn’t able to go to Lunam. This time of year is busy for the business, so we are going to Napa. I’m nervous about meeting him. I hope I live up to his expectations, even though Layla says it’s my bloodline that matters, not my manners. Layla and Monte are also going to Napa. Monte and Lowell Dukes run the pack together. My father is the power and Dillan’s father is the money.
I walk into the kitchen and find it empty. The pots have all been washed and sit on the counters ready to be packed. I look in the walk-in refrigerator for something to eat. I find several packs of yogurt. I take one and walk out at the same time Dillan and Cassie walk into the kitchen.
“Hey you,” Dillan leaves Cassie’s side and gives me a kiss on the cheek. “I found Cassie for you.”
“Thanks,” I say. A twinge of jealousy stabs at my chest. Quit being stupid. “Did you tell her?” I try to hide any bitterness in my tone.
“Of course not. I knew you would want to.” He kisses me and my anguish vanishes. “I’ll leave you to it. I gotta go help Drake pack his van.”
“I didn’t know alpha leaders had to help pack?” I tease him. He’s wearing jeans and a black t-shirt that shows off his perfect surfer body. He looks more handsome today than he did yesterday, if that’s possible.
“They do, unless they want a mutiny on their first day!” he calls over his shoulder and disappears into the sunlight.
I miss him already.
“What did you want to tell me?” Cassie interrupts.
I take both of her hands and tell her my plan to bring her to Sierra.
“No, no way. I don’t want to leave my family. They’re all I have now.” This wasn’t the reaction I hoped for.
“If you come with me, you can go to college or get a job. You can do whatever you want. Love whomever you want.” I came up with the college idea last night. It’s what I would do if I were her.
Cassie shakes her head; I can see she is searching for a way to let me down easy. “I appreciate it, really. But I don’t want to go to college.”
“Only because you never thought you had the option,” I reason. Cassie’s entire life has lead up to Lunam. I bet she’s never even entertained the idea of living a life outside the pack.
Cassie shakes her head and closes her eyes as if to hold in her tears. “I was happy to be in Lunam. I wanted to match and have children.”
“You can still have children,” I tell her. “You can fall in love on your own terms. Don’t you see, you have options now. You can do things you never thought possible.”
Cassie contemplates my plan for a few seconds. “I used to play school when I was little. I would round up all the kids and pretend I was their teacher.”
“You can be that teacher now.” I pull her into my arms and give her a huge hug. “I will help you.”
“I wanted my children to lead one day. My family depended on it,” Cassie says softly. “My father will never let me leave.” She pulls away. “He needs me.” Her face is adamant, and I see that this isn’t just about her. “I know you want to help, but I can’t let him down any more than I already have.”
“I’m sorry. I guess I’m just being selfish.” Tears tickle the corners of my eyes. “You’re the first real friend I’ve ever had, and now I’m losing you.”
“You have a whole pack of females fighting to be your BFF,” Cassie jokes. “We’ll see each other often. I’ll make sure of it.”
“Promise?” A tear rolls down my cheek at the thought of losing her.
Cassie nods her head and swipes a tear of her own. “I promise.”
Layla convinces Monte to ride to Napa in the convertible. He agreed but is giving her a hard time about her driving skills. “Why are you so worried? You’re the one who taught me to drive.” I’m shocked when I hear this. Layla taught me to drive when I was fourteen. I was tall enough to reach the brake, and that was good enough for her. She said she never wanted me to depend on anyone for anything, even a ride home. Hearing that Monte taught Layla to drive changes my perspective on their relationship. Maybe they did care about each other in some way.
It’s strange, but Layla looks happier than I’ve ever seen. All these years I thought she hated my father. Looking at them now, it looks like they just went through Lunam.
Monte kisses me on the cheek and tells Dillan to drive safely. Dillan shakes his hand, and they disappear to the back of Dillan’s truck. Layla gives me a long hug. “I’m so proud of you.”
It feels good in her arms. I relish the moment and let her pull away first. “I’ll miss you, Mom.”
“Call me, every day if you want. I’ll be at Jessie’s.” She opens the door to the truck and I climb in.
“When are you going back to Nevada?”
“I took a leave of absence. I want to see how things work out here,” she says as Monte reappears. I thought I knew all of my mother’s smiles, but this one is new. Or old depending on how you look at it. It peeves me to know she kept me hostage in that desert hellhole all these years and now she just leaves without looking back.
“You ready?” Monte slides up to her and takes her hand. Layla winks at me. “We’ll see you in Napa.” Monte waves.
Dillan jumps into the driver’s seat and starts the engine. I wave at my parents. My parents! Standing hand in hand seeing me off just like parents do when their child leaves for college. I quickly wipe the tears, but Dillan notices anyway. “Ah babe, don’t cry. You’ll see them tonight,” He pats my leg.
“I know, it’s not that,” I tell him. I had so many doubts about coming to Lunam, about who I am. I still have reservations about my feelings for Dillan and how I will fit into the pack, but I’m not afraid anymore. Not after seeing how happy Layla is. She needed this, she needed to come back. Not just for me, for herself.
I look back one more time and see Cassie walking to a black SUV with Conall, the leader of the Shasta pack. “Cassie is Conall’s daughter?”
“Yeah, you didn’t know?” Dillan turns out of the parking lot and heads towards the highway.
That would make Cassie a pureblood; she should have matched with someone strong, like Dillan. I swallow back tears and close my eyes. How horrible this must be for her and her family. “How does her not matching affect her family? Will her bloodline end if she doesn’t have children?”
Dillan shrugs and says the Shasta pack doesn’t think preserving their bloodline is a priority. “Some think their line is already tainted. Cassie not matching sort of proves that. A pureblood always finds a mate.”
“Cassie also told me that purebloods usually match within their own pack, but Layla matched with Monte. Maybe things change, evolve,” I reason. “Just because Cassie is sweet and kind, it doesn’t make her any less alpha.”
“You see her as sweet, others see her as passive,” Dillan says. “You weren’t raised around the packs, you don’t understand.”
How dare he throw that in my face? I’m glad I wasn’t raised in a pack. “Maybe I see things from a fresh perspective.”
Dillan smiles at my challenge. “I love how fired up you get over nothing.” He rubs the top of my thigh, and my skin tingles where his palm touches me. Without wanting to, I calm down.
“I’m worried about my friend’s future,” I say softly. “I wouldn’t call it nothing. I just want her to have a good life. If I can help her in any way, I will.”
“You’re right, I’m sorry. If Cassie’s future is important to you, then it’s important to me.”
“She doesn’t understand there is a big world out there that doesn’t care about her bloodline. If I could just show her. I know she can be happy leading a normal life.” The life I wanted to lead until the moment I met Dillan.
“If it means that much to you, I’ll talk to my dad and see what he thinks about transferring Cassie to our branch, ok?”
I jump out of my seat and kiss Dillan on the cheek. “Thank you, thank you, thank you. I love you!”
Whoa! Where the hell did that come from?
“Did you just say what I think you said?” Dillan grabs the back of my head and kisses me as if the words mean something.
I return to my seat, feeling guilty for allowing him to think I love him. I didn’t mean it like that. It’s like someone saying: I’ll be your best friend if you…
I stay quiet for most of the drive. I’m too afraid to start any conversation that may end with “I love you.” Eventually Dillan turns on the radio and music drowns out my thoughts. When a corny love song comes on, Dillan sings the chorus softly to himself. It’s the most adorable thing I’ve ever seen. If my only problem in life is falling in love with this beautiful, sweet, boy, then so be it. My life could be a lot worse.
When we pull to a stop in front of the large ornate gates that lead to Dillan’s family home, I get nervous. I pull down the visor and check my hair in the little mirror. I have it pulled into a ponytail since I didn’t have time to blow dry it this morning.
“You look beautiful,” Dillan says and flips the mirror up. “You don’t need to impress anyone.”
That’s sweet of him to say, but I flip the mirror down and make sure I don’t have any food in my teeth.
The gates open magically, and Dillan eases the gas slowly towards the house. Or should I say mansion. There are several cars parked in the circular driveway; Layla’s convertible isn’t among them. When Dillan hops out of the truck, I take another peek in the mirror before I get out.
Dillan tells me to relax just as a maid appears at the front door. She looks like she wants to hug Dillan but refrains. She tells us his parents are waiting on the veranda. Whatever that is. I walk around the perfectly placed furniture, making sure I don’t touch anything. It looks like a museum or a really expensive furniture store. It feels cold and unlived in. We walk through a set of French doors and I realize a veranda is another word for fancy patio.
