My Happy Ending Part 1, page 27
“Whatever sells records,” Jackie muttered so softly I barely heard him.
No more working with Bree. No more being hassled over refusing to work with Bree. Somehow this wasn’t enough to brighten my mood.
My eyes clouded over as I glanced up, that picture of the kids catching my eye.
I missed them terribly.
They... they should be pounding on the door, or running in unannounced trying to get me to settle some argument, and I...
Oh, God.
Talli, I swear I’d never yell at you to control them, to keep them out of here again. I’m so sorry...
So sorry.
“I guess that’s all I’ve got,” Chris said. “What about you, Jackie?”
“Um, I have a few messages from people who don’t have your new home phone number,” Jackie said, handing me some small slips of paper.
“Sorry,” I muttered, cringing when I saw that one of them was my mother. Why didn’t she call my cell? Oh, shit, this was from this morning. My cell was still off. I reached into my pocket, pulling it out and hitting the ‘on’ button.
“Yeah, try not to do that anymore,” he said, pointing at me. “Oh, and I have a message sent basically through the media to you.”
“Oh, fuck,” I groaned, holding my head in my hands. “Go ahead, lay it on me.”
“Rebecca St. John has announced that she’s taking over your custody case.”
My head snapped up, my eyes wide. Holy shit, Kate did it.
“What did you say?” I asked, my heart pounding in my chest.
“Rebecca St. John has...”
“Wow,” I cut him off, sitting back in my chair.
I smiled then... a genuine smile as my gaze once more fell on that picture of my children.
This wasn’t such a bad day after all.
CHAPTER 19
TALLI
IT WAS THURSDAY MORNING when I made my way back into my office, ignoring every single phone call from Dr. Stewart and every one of her associates. I was not going to be kept away from my job by some blood hungry sharks, they would not keep food out of my kids’ mouths or take the roof off from over their heads. I piled everyone into the vehicle, fighting my way through traffic, and dropped them off at the daycare that I’d already paid for before pushing my way through the front doors of the practice, strutting my way through that waiting room and down that hallway towards my office.
“Talli, wait,” one of the receptionists called after me, but I waved her off. Their waiting room was full, and I knew that part of that reason was they had continued to reschedule my patients around everyone else’s schedule.
That was far from necessary.
“Talia.” Dr. Stewart sounded so surprised to see me. “I... um...”
“If you’re going to fire me, then do it now, but by God you better have just cause,” I said right to her in the middle of that hallway. She silently nodded towards my office door, which I went into, dropping my purse in the chair nearest my desk. I picked up my stack of messages and began thumbing through them, placing them in order of importance when she walked in behind me and shut the door.
“I know you’re going through a rough time right now.”
“Do you?” I asked, looking up at her. “I don’t have any more leave; I’ve used every bit of it up with the move and every single illness that Emily has had. I will not let a bunch of assholes looking for a story keep me prisoner in my own home, and I won’t be bullied into leaving a job that not only do I need to support my children, but I deserve. I’ve worked my ass off for you, and you know it.”
“Oh, Talli,” was all she would say, tears brimming in her eyes. I stood momentarily stunned as she walked over to me, throwing her arms around my shoulders and pulling me into a hug. “It’s so good to see you.”
“See me?” I asked, confused. “I was just here on Friday. It’s your own damn fault I haven’t been in since Tuesday.”
She laughed, pushing back, placing a hand on the side of my face. “Oh, girl. You just don’t get it. Still.”
“I think you’ve lost your damn mind is what I’m thinking,” I muttered, stepping back from her. I was still looking at her like she’d been transplanted straight from Mars when I asked, “What’s on the agenda for today?”
“Well, we’re overbooked, as you can see.”
“Mmm hmm, I see that,” I said, placing my messages to the side.
“We’ve rescheduled your patients for next week, but it would be such a tremendous help if you could handle pap smears today.”
“Oh, goodie,” I deadpanned. “Yeah, not a problem. When’s my first?”
“They’re getting her prepped in exam room two.”
“Thanks. I’ve got this.”
“That’s so good to know,” she replied. “See you at lunch break?”
“Of course.”
“Good. And Talli?”
I looked up at her, waiting for her to finish her thought.
“Welcome back.”
“WOW.” I JUMPED SLIGHTLY as Dr. Paul Coffman appeared beside me in the lounge off to the side of the cafeteria. I paused from taking a bite of my apple to peer over at him.
“What?” I asked.
“You look absolutely stunning today,” he said, sitting down in the chair next to me.
I looked down at my black tailored pants and teal blue shirt, then back over at him. “Um... thank you?” I smiled as he laughed. “No, seriously, thank you. You’ve helped me so much this week.”
“Your kids are adorable, even if your youngest hates my guts.”
“If it’s any consolation, she hates everyone’s guts,” I replied, setting the apple down and opting for my salad instead. “And you’re just gonna have to deal with me eating. I’m fucking starving.”
“Really? Do I know him?”
“Oh, ha ha.” I rolled my eyes and gave him a slight kick in his shin. “You only think you’re funny.”
“I know I am. Oh, by the way... speaking of funny...”
“This should be good.”
He held out two tickets that I squinted at, then my eyes widened in surprise.
“Spamalot? How did you manage that?” I asked.
“I know people,” he answered with an easygoing shrug. “Or, my ex-wife knows people who like me better than they do her, I should say. It’s for next Friday evening, and I think I know one feisty little redhead who’s due for some fun.”
“Oh, yeah? Who’s that?” I asked, and he raised his eyebrow at me. “Oh... me? Really?” My voice was softer as I looked at the tickets, then back at him.
“As friends, Talli.”
I could use a friend.
“I’ll behave myself, I promise.”
“Well, yeah, ‘cause you’d be ball-less if you didn’t,” I said without thinking, then put my hand over my mouth, my eyes wide. “Oh, I’m so sorry.”
He didn’t even hear my apology, he was laughing so hard. Good one, Talli.
“My, you are a spunky one,” he finally said as he calmed down, and I felt my face fall.
Spunky.
That was one of my nicknames... one that Jackie had given me.
“I’m sorry, are you okay?” he asked suddenly.
“Oh, yeah... yeah, I’m fine,” I replied, covering. “I just...” I pulled out my phone that was beginning to buzz in my pocket. “Oh, I’m sorry, I really need to take this.”
“Go ahead,” he said with a grin as I stood and walked over to the corner of the lounge, answering the phone call as quietly as I could.
I really hate my personal business being out in the open.
“Hey... what’s up?” I asked in the most cheerful voice I could conjure up.
“Not too much,” Tish responded through the line. “I’ve just been worried. I haven’t heard from you since I came back to Ohio, and there’s plenty of crap being splashed all in the tabloids about you.”
“Yeah, you know how it goes,” I said nonchalantly. “They’re looking for a story, what can I say?”
“Room full of people?”
“Damn, you’re good.”
“So I’ve been told. Hey... are you okay, though? I mean, physically?”
“Yeah, yeah. I had a complete checkup and everything,” I replied, a bit confused until I remembered she’d actually been at Emily’s party. “I really am fine.”
“You just haven’t been yourself lately... I know, I know, I wouldn’t be either,” she cut off what was sure to be my reply. “Look, I’m just going to ask you this straight up. Talli, I love you; you know I do. I don’t think the answer is yes, but I’m not living there so I don’t know. Are you using again?”
I felt my face flame red at her question, my temper flaring. Keep it in check, Talli. Room full of people, which she probably counted on. Count. One, two, three...
“Talli...”
“No,” I said quietly. “And you of all people should know better than to ask me, since you were there before.”
“I had to ask, Talli. I don’t know you anymore.”
Oh, wow.
I thought of that statement the rest of the day. I thought about it as Paul agreed to let me ponder whether or not to go to see a play with him. I thought about it as I talked with Jaden about her baby shower, relenting when she insisted that she was buying tickets for me and the kids to come out. I thought about it as I closed up at the office, finishing my paperwork before picking up the kids and driving home.
Tish, one of my oldest and dearest friends, didn’t know me anymore.
But I’d heard that so many times, from so many people over the past year.
I’d heard it from Mave that day at the courthouse when they took visitation away from Jase.
I’d heard it from Sondra, who’d told me to stand up for myself when I caught Jase with Bree.
I’d heard it from Jackie when I just couldn’t pull myself out of bed one day.
I’d heard it from Linda, from Chris, from Pete.
I’d heard it from Jaden too many times to count.
And Jase.
I’d heard it from him, too. And I’d told him he was imagining things, he was making shit up in his head, he was too wrapped up in himself.
Seriously? I had said that to him?
And the truth is, as I sat there that night, washing the makeup off my face after putting the kids to bed, I was staring in the mirror at someone who’d become a virtual stranger. I had shut myself off from everyone... everyone, just like I’d sworn, and promised I would never do again. One by one I had isolated myself from the people I loved the most, from the people who loved me.
And I had no idea how to fix it.
I had no idea how to fix me.
And the saddest part? The first person I wanted to call was Jase.
I just want to tell him I’m sorry.
I’m so very sorry.
The phone ringing jarred me from my pity party, my heart jumping into my throat over my wishful thinking, but it was just Paul.
No, not just Paul. Paul who had befriended me, stuck by me and given me unwavering support Paul.
“Is everything okay?” he asked.
“Yes and no,” I replied with a shrug that he couldn’t see.
“Is it anything you want to talk about?”
“I... I do need to talk about it. Just... not with you, please don’t take that the wrong way.”
“No... no, I won’t. Are you saying what I think you’re saying, Talli? You’re ready?”
I nodded through my tears.
“I can’t hear you.”
“Yes,” I finally said before burying my face in my hands, letting go of a sob.
“That’s wonderful news. I’m...”
“If you say you’re proud of me I’m so kicking you in some place that will hurt a lot more than your shin,” I cut him off, and he laughed.
“Fine, I won’t say it. When are you going to go?”
“As soon as... as soon as I can,” I said, wiping my eyes hastily.
“I’m not going to let you back out of this, you know.”
“Oh, Paul. You silly boy. When I make my mind up, that’s all she wrote.”
“I’ve heard that about you. Haven’t seen it for a while, but I’ve heard it.”
“Fuck you,” I muttered with a half laugh.
“I thought... no, never mind, bad joke coming on.”
“You seem full of them,” I deadpanned, sniffling slightly. “Paul, thanks... for not... for not giving up on me.”
“Talli, I don’t think anyone has given up on you.”
I choked back a sob as my mind drifted to the boy with the beautiful eyes... the one who’d stolen my heart, only to hand it back to me in tiny shards.
I’m sorry, Paul.
This time, you’re wrong.
JASE
MS. SCHWARTZ, THE COURT appointed liaison assigned to our case, has absolutely no sense of humor. Nada. None. When she showed up Wednesday afternoon unannounced, she glared at the cold beer in my hand. She was even less receptive to the fact that it was my fourth of the day. I joked that it didn’t matter since they were keeping my kids from me anyway.
Bad first impression, I know.
She seemed a bit alarmed at the number of trash bags, which I found disturbing. Who the hell cares how much I was throwing out? Okay, so there were a lot of broken things in the rubble, scattered pieces of pictures I’d destroyed strewn about, but they’d all make the trash eventually, right? She also counted the number of empties in my recycle bin, and didn’t think it was the least bit amusing that a lot of those came from various people during my daughter’s first birthday party. Count those against me, too, sweetheart. By now I’m used to it.
My cousin Tom was in town, helping me shovel out the old and bring in the new, which was great for me in most ways. Not so much, though, when he joked about the ‘throw down’ that Talli and I’d had in the basement. Oh, great, now she’s going to think that we were like that, that I am like that.
Neither was the truth.
I did get brownie points for donating furniture, though. I mean, why the hell not? I certainly didn’t need it, there were too many soured memories associated with every piece I was hauling away.
All in all, though... a big negative. Huge.
“She was not digging on your sense of humor, dude,” Tom was saying later as we sat out on the back porch in the furniture that would be leaving the next morning.
“No, she was not,” I half-slurred. “She needs to grow a sense of humor of her own.”
“Amen, brotha,” he agreed, holding up his bottle, which I semi-gently hit with mine, sending a bit of beer splashing onto the table between us. “Dude, alcohol abuse.”
“I’m not,” I paused as a slight hiccup left me, “I’m not licking it up. It can stay there.”
“That sounded...” His voice trailed off as he threw his head back in laughter.
“Don’t go there, man. Don’t do it.”
“You’re so hard up you’d go for a table know.”
“I don’t ‘cause you won’t tell,” he commented, suddenly serious, glancing over at me as he took another drink of his beer. “What happened?”
I felt my mood sour as I glared at my bottle, like it was going to change anything. “I don’t know.”
“Oh bullshit, dude,” Tom said with a laugh. “One minute you’re all having me bust my ass to get this glorious surprise for her, the next she’s moving out and filing for divorce. You still...”
“Yes,” I cut him off, hating how my mood had shifted, hating how she could still get to me when she wasn’t even here. “She’s... she’ll love it,” I finished quietly, without adding how I wished she still loved me.
“One word that I have to say, and I don’t care how pissed off at me you get.”
“What’s that?” I asked without looking over at him.
“Bree.”
I felt my jaw clench at the sound of her name.
“And I just got my answer.”
“What do you mean?” I asked, finally looking over at him.
“You didn’t split up for you to be with Bree.”
“Fuck no,” I said quickly with a shake of my head. “I didn’t want her to go.”
“I hear ya.”
For the first time since he’d gotten there, I remembered that Tom had been through a divorce as well. Man, did I ever feel like an ass.
“I’m sorry, Tom... I didn’t ... fuck, I don’t want to bring up bad memories or any shit like that for you.”
“No, I’m okay,” he said with a shrug. “And I mean that, you know? She’s happier, I’m happy for her, we’ve moved on. That was how many years ago?”
“Five,” I said. “Right about five. Talli was pregnant.”
“With Elizabeth, fuck that’s right dude! Damn, you have a good memory.”
“Most of the time. You know, when I’m not killing my brain cells.” I grinned, trying to suppress the memories.
Fuck.
I’d thrown away the best thing that ever fucking happened to me, and here I was sitting getting shitfaced in my own back yard, drinking to try and forget her.
And I was never going to.
“Man... just... talk. Just do it. It’s not going to go anywhere; it’s not going to leave my lips once I leave this house, you know?”
“I don’t know what I did wrong.” I heard the words coming from my mouth, I just didn’t recollect saying them. “I mean... before Bree. Before all that shit, because that wasn’t the beginning.”
“Wow.” He was quiet for a moment. “No offense, but I didn’t know anything was up until all this shit hit the tabloids.”
“No one did, except us.”
“Well, you both deserve Oscars then, because I never would have dreamed you two had fallen out of love.”
“I haven’t.”
I said it with such conviction that it almost scared me.
“But you think she has?”
“Yeah,” I replied, taking a long drink of my beer. “Can we change the subject?”
“Sort of,” he said, and I raised an eyebrow at him. “This lawyer chick, the one that announced she’s taking over your case, the one that Kate helped get for you.”
