Never Look Back, page 33
Me: And delete this thread before Papa sees it, and he locks you away forever.
Taylor: Done, big sister. Don’t worry yourself. I have it handled. I’ll be in touch soon. Stay safe.
She finished it off with a row of blowing-kiss faces.
While I stood there terrified of what I’d gotten her into.
THIRTY-NINE
LOGAN
“Do you have any idea what you standing there looking that way does to me?”
I hovered at the doorway of the bathroom and watched Aster get ready in front of the mirror. The girl wore this floor-length white dress that shimmered in the light, a slit riding up to her right thigh, the material slinky and sliding over those lush curves.
Nothing but satin and temptation.
My Little Star that burned so bright it was blinding.
Fire-agate eyes met my gaze in the reflection. I felt her expression all the way to my guts, and my fingers itched with the need to trace the lines of her gorgeous face. She had her hair up in a twist, and a couple pieces hung loose to caress her bare shoulders exposed by the tiny straps of her dress.
She wore the same necklace she’d worn the first night in the basement, the star I’d given her years before, and her engagement ring on her finger that I’d never thought would find its rightful place.
My heart squeezed.
She was a vision.
A gift.
A treasure.
Her gaze slipped over me as I slowly edged forward, and attraction quivered in the space. A deep intensity that whispered and bound and never let go.
“You don’t look too terrible yourself.”
A rough chuckle fumbled out as I wrapped my hands around her waist and pressed my nose to the flesh behind her ear.
I inhaled.
Hyacinth and magnolias.
“I love it when you look at me like that,” I murmured.
A slip of playfulness pulled at the edge of her mouth. “Like what?”
“Like you want me to peel you out of this dress and fuck you until you can’t see.”
“Well, I was kind of hoping for that later.” Her voice was breathy, needy with a shot of a tease.
“It was on the agenda,” I rumbled as I kissed a path down the column of her neck.
“It’d better be. You wouldn’t want to go and disappoint me on New Year’s Eve, would you?”
Savage seductress.
My chuckle grew deep as need burned hot in my stomach. My right hand slipped up the front of her dress, over her stomach and breasts until I was holding her by the front of the neck.
I felt the whimper curl up her throat, and my mouth was back to her ear. “Oh, you won’t be disappointed, Little Star. I’m going to ruin you tonight. I promise you.”
Desire raced across her flesh.
A growl got free.
“Who do you belong to, Aster?” I held her closer, possession filling my blood.
She met my stare through the mirror. “You, Logan. You.”
A hungry groan rolled in my chest. “You have me entranced.”
“And you have me ensnared. All of me.”
I held her close before I forced myself to step back. “We should go or we’re going to be late. We don’t want Trent or Jud banging down the door if we are.”
There was a big New Year’s Eve party at Absolution. I was looking forward to it, if I were being honest, celebrating with my family, with my girl. The other part couldn’t wait to get her out of that dress.
“Or worse…Tessa.” Playfully, Aster widened her eyes.
I laughed over the amusement. This joy that I could hardly process. “Come on, it couldn’t be that bad. She is only half insane.”
“She might go full straightjacket if we don’t show.” Affection rippled through her features.
Everything inside me softened. “I love you with them. With my family.”
She reached out and squeezed my hand. “Our family.”
It was a promise.
Profound and real and everything.
“Our family.” I squeezed back.
She tried to hold it back, but I saw the flash of worry streak across her face.
“I know you’re worried about what tomorrow will bring, Aster, and we’ll face it together. But for now…for tonight…we celebrate us.”
Because we’d spent too damn long living without.
“Then tomorrow, we tell thirty days it can suck it.” A smirk split my mouth.
Aster choked out a soggy laugh. “I like that plan.”
I stepped forward and pressed my lips to her forehead. “Me, too, baby. Me, too.”
I took her hand and led her out into the main room. Gretchen sat forward from where she was on the couch thumbing through a magazine, and she pressed her hand to her heart.
“Woo wee, you two are gonna cause an accident walking around like that. Holy hell fire and obscenities. Best looking couple that I ever did see, if I don’t say so myself. You’d better bring a bat to fight off anyone who gets to looking at your man too hard.”
She winked at Aster.
Aster giggled. “Don’t worry, G. I’m going to fight for him, just like he’ll fight for me.”
“Well, if you need backup, you know where to find me. I’m feeling extra frisky tonight. Two of us? They won’t even know what hit ’em.”
Thirty minutes later we pulled into the Absolution parking lot.
Blue neon lights shined like a beacon through the misty, frozen air. A vibe curled through the night, promising revelry and probably a little debauchery, too.
As usual, the place was packed, but when there would normally be a line winding around the building, tonight it was ticket-only. Trent’s general manager, Sage, had organized a kick-ass party. Some super popular band, A Riot of Roses, was playing, and it promised to be a madhouse inside.
I glanced to where Aster sat, and my heart panged in my fucking chest. I couldn’t wait to share it with her.
I wound around to the employee lot so we could sneak in the side door, and I was out and opening Aster’s door and making her giggle as I rushed to help her up.
“Someone’s excited.”
Grinning, I tugged her against my chest. “You know I’m always game for a party, baby, and we’re just getting started.”
“Sounds fun.” It was pure innuendo.
Flirty.
Loved that side of my girl, too.
“So much fun,” I rumbled, and I dipped down to peck a quick kiss to her lips before I stepped back and took her hand. “Let’s get you inside where it’s warm.”
She was wearing her heavy coat again, but it didn’t do a whole lot to cover her legs.
We scrambled over the pitted parking lot and to the side door, both of us cracking up by the time we got there since we’d been slipping and sliding all over the frozen pavement.
Our breath was vapor that misted around us.
Our joy a shout that sang from our souls.
Keeping her close, I reached in and pulled the door open. Milo was standing guard. His smile turned soft when he realized it was us and not some prick trying to sneak in.
“Milo, my man, how have you been?” We gave each other a quick hug with a clap to the shoulder. “Can’t complain, now, can I?”
His smile was slow when he turned his attention on Aster. “Good to see you again. I see you’re putting up with this guy.”
I tugged her back to me then took her by the wrist so I could flash him her ring. “And she’s going to be putting up with me for the rest of her life.”
His brows went high before he slanted a disbelieving grin at her. “Ah, I see how it is. You went and broke the wild one?”
“Oh, we’re just about to get wild,” I tossed out.
Aster giggled. “It seems there is no breaking to it, but I’m at least going to keep him reined.”
He chuckled. “Good. He needs someone to keep him in line.”
“Happy New Year, Milo,” Aster said before I dragged her down the hall and out into the mayhem that was Absolution.
People were packed wall to wall, and the band was already on the stage, a disco ball tossing glittering rays over the crowd that throbbed and danced.
I kept my hand snug on Aster’s as I shouldered through the crowd toward our reserved booth. We broke through to find Trent and Eden tucked on one side, the girl sitting fully sideways on his lap. Tessa sat next to them. Salem and Jud were on the opposite side, and Jud’s arm was draped over Salem’s shoulder, and she had her head rested on his chest.
I loved that my brothers had found it. Found what they deserved. What was right.
A flash of grief came faster than I could hold it back. The fact that Nathan had never gotten that chance. He was blameless, no stains, pure, and he was the one who’d gone down for our sins.
A hand slipped up my spine. Warmth and comfort. I let go of a shaky breath and pushed it aside because I’d learned the hard way that dwelling on what couldn’t be changed didn’t fix anything. It caused more torment. Ate away the good memories and left you consumed by the mistakes.
For so long, my memories of Nathan had been tainted, but I didn’t want that any longer.
Tessa popped up the second she noticed us, and she threw her arms in the air. “Finally, you are here!”
“I know you were missing me, but come now, Tessa, at least try to keep your infatuation contained.” I let the razzing free. I couldn’t help it when it was so easy to mess with the girl.
She gasped then shook her head like she felt sorry for me. “Um, I am infatuated, but that infatuation is with your girlfriend.”
Aster giggled.
I grabbed my girl’s hand again and waved it like I was showcasing the next prize on a cheesy game show. “That would be fiancée.”
That time when Tessa gasped, it was real. “Shut your fucking face. Are you serious?”
Joy burst from Aster. So profound it slammed me like a shockwave. “It seems he’s stuck with me.”
Tessa flew forward and grabbed Aster’s hand so she could study the ring.
That tiny ring that I’d happily exchange for something bigger and flashier, but Aster had made it clear there wasn’t a chance.
Emotion kept rushing from Aster as she was surrounded in attention. Salem and Eden jumped up, too, and the three women smothered my girl in a crush of arms and well-wishes and giggles.
There was no missing the weight of my brothers’ stares, though. I hadn’t told them yet. I didn’t want to get them any more spun up than they already were. The mess that we were in that I still didn’t have a fucking clue how to get out of. All that history that we still didn’t have an answer for.
Trent slid out, and I took a couple steps his way. He stuck out his hand. I guessed I shouldn’t have been surprised when he said, “Congrats, man.”
Relief hit me as I shook it, and he used it to pull me in tight, hugging me hard, his words a rumble at my ear, “Congrats. Truly. Want the world for you. You deserve it. And I know you love her, and I want you to know, I stand by you, by her, whatever you need.”
Thickness filled my throat, and I nodded as I eased back. “Thanks, brother.”
“And you know that goes the same for me,” Jud promised as he came in to hug me, too. “Anything. After spending Christmas Eve with you two, it was clear. Whatever shit went down, it didn’t have the power to destroy that love you have for each other, and if you have somethin’ that powerful, it’s your job to fucking hold onto it. Don’t let it go. Whatever it takes.”
I peeked back at Aster. I felt it way down deep in my soul.
I turned back to my brothers. “I won’t.”
Tessa whirled around on another gasp, and she slapped her hand over her heart. “I can’t believe it…the player tossed in the towel.”
She had no idea it was in more ways than one.
Women.
Gambling.
The shady deals.
The greed.
It was done.
Everything except for the overpowering need I had for Aster.
Sauntering that way, I ruffled my fingers through Tessa’s red hair, just to fuck with her.
Her mouth dropped open. “How dare you, Logan Lawson? Do you have any idea how long it took me to achieve this perfection?” She shimmied in her electric-blue dress that was so tiny someone was definitely getting a peep show tonight, top or bottom, we couldn’t be sure.
“I mean, okay, I’m already perfect, but we went all out tonight. Have you seen us?”
She swished an overzealous hand at Eden and Salem.
Truth was, they were all fucking knockouts, unforgettable in their own ways. But it was Aster who was hiding her laughter off to the side of them who lit me up.
The one who sparked a wildfire in my insides and made me feel like I was being burned alive, and somehow, it still was the best feeling ever.
“Sorry to break it to you, Tessa, but I only have eyes for one girl.”
I moved for Aster, relished the way the redness flushed over her chest and up to her cheeks, like maybe she was getting burned alive, too.
“Awww.” Tessa looked like she was about to cry.
Salem took her hand. “Come on, let’s dance while I can still keep my eyes open.”
Eden giggled as she hooked her elbow with Salem’s. “Um, no, you’re here at least until midnight, lady.”
“But my feet are swollen,” Salem whined.
“Yeah, and my boobs are leaking. Suck it up.”
They started to weave into the crowd. Aster looked back from over her shoulder as they went.
Joy.
It shined all around her.
A halo of light.
My Little Star.
FORTY
ASTER
Lights strobed, and the band played, and the crowd rejoiced.
Celebrating.
My celebration was the truth of this man who held me close in the middle of the crush, his forehead dropped to mine and his big hands spread out around my ribs as we swayed. It was close to the way we’d done the night of his birthday.
But then, there’d been so many questions.
It didn’t feel that way tonight.
Tonight, it felt as if we’d been lifted.
Elevated.
Exulted above the mess to delight in what we’d been given.
It was half an hour to midnight, and the revelers had turned rowdy. Drinks flowed free as everyone cut loose the weights and worries of the previous year in anticipation of the new.
It sent excitement billowing through the cavernous space.
He edged back to gaze down at my face. “Look at you beneath all those lights, still shining brighter than anyone.”
“I think I’m just reflecting off you.”
“Hardly.”
Our words were barely audible above the din, but we felt them, our spirits swimming together in a sea of exhilaration.
I wanted to stay there forever.
But I was jostled back and out of the dream when the crowd was suddenly torn apart. People scrambled to get out of the way as six big bodies busted through.
Panic.
Fear.
Hate.
They burst in my blood.
No.
Eyes wide with shock, I fumbled back.
No.
My papa was at the helm of the men I knew had come to drag me away. His expression was contorted in disappointment and rueful discontent.
Jarek was at his side, venom in his eyes and vileness in his presence, the man slicked in a sweat that reeked of malevolence. Four men surrounded them, three that I recognized as Jarek’s guards and one of my father’s.
Violence bristled through the air, and Logan stepped in front of me to create a barricade. Hostility burned from his being.
This man a hedge of protection to shield.
But continuing to hide wasn’t going to get us out of this.
The mass continued to throb, oblivious to the ground that had been ripped out from under my feet.
“It’s time to leave. Now.” Jarek’s vicious voice curled over the music.
“That’s not going to happen.” The words speared from Logan’s mouth. I could feel his control fraying in every tremor that rocked through his body.
“I thought by now you would have remembered who you’re dealing with,” Jarek spat, taking a step forward. He lifted his chin in arrogance, his power gained in the men who surrounded him.
The crowd parted again, a wave that undulated from behind to give way to Jud and Trent, plus Milo and Kult and three other bouncers who came up behind us.
A fortress of strength.
Aggression quivered in the dense atmosphere.
Two groups in opposition.
Trent stepped forward. “I don’t appreciate you waltzing into my place of business when you haven’t been invited.” He cocked his head. “Paying customers only, and all. No offense.”
Oh, it was purely offense.
Old hate.
Conflict and contention.
Papa angled his head, his voice controlled. “My daughter is here.”
Trent sent a sweeping gaze back my direction before he turned toward my father. “It appears it’s where she wants to be.”
My father ignored him and looked at me. “You were given thirty days, mia vita. The time has come.”
I could see in his eyes he no longer believed I was there to retrieve the stones.
“She’s not going anywhere with you. Not any of you.” The words were razors that cut from Logan’s mouth.
Jarek and his men surged forward.
Logan, Trent, and Jud did the same.
The promise of violence clotted the air.
Stagnant and harsh.
“Then you die tonight.” Jarek hissed it.
I could feel the frantic eyes that had gathered. Eden, Salem, and Tessa were suddenly there, terrified, held back by Milo.
They’d meant it when they’d promised to come alongside me.
A feeling washed over me.
Marked.
Potent.
Mandatory.
I was finished being pushed around.
