Devotion: For Love or Honor, page 35
“Look. Jenny and I can handle the wedding arrangements, the dress, and the dinner reservations. What I need you to do is the minute you get the word that Ryan is cleared to leave base we have to get him and Jenny to the courthouse to register for the wedding license.” Merrilee and Rob work through the list. We were fortunate to find a chaplain, a guitar player and a restaurant that all agreed to the term stand-by while we waited for the final determination of our wedding date. I happily agreed to have the ceremony on a Wednesday. Anything is fine with me; all I want to be is Mrs. Ryan Raines.
I busy myself unpacking boxes, in our room. Rhett’s room is set-up we chose the space for him based on the light blue color and the large windows overlooking the large backyard which backs up to a forest. The neighbors alerted us too there will be days when you might hear, the sounds of shooting from the base, but not to worry. So far, Merrilee and I have met several residents of the neighborhood, wives, and a few of the husbands. It appears the majority of the community consists of at least one enlisted spouse. A few older couples, some retired military or moved closer to their children and grandchildren. We have been asked some questions, not invasive but more curiosity. I gave up and finally came clean with the situation.
I tuck Rhett down for his nap, taking the chance for the quiet time to set up my desk in the office. Since Rob and Merrilee are officially sharing a room when he is here to visit, we took the fourth bedroom and turning it into an office with two desks, room for the computers. Also, Ryan and I will have a bookcase to store our camera equipment. I hope to start my photography business here and branch out once again for weddings. With the large population of the military, it should not be too difficult to make a name for my business. I did find a nice Marine wife to photograph our ceremony; she is available during the week and tends to not accept jobs on weekends due to her children and husband.
The office was one of the first things on my list, with the weekly column deadline plus researching the options for a book deal with which I was approached I spend a good portion of my day in here. The portable crib sits in the office, including a fuzzy rug. Nearing four months, Rhett is beginning to get quite fast with his scooting and rolling, requiring me to keep him occupied in the crib with a ton of toys to keep his interest. When I find myself in a bind, Pop, the name we assigned Rhett’s grandpa because every time Rob holds him, my son makes this popping noise with his lips. Merrilee sends Rob off on a walk with the baby whenever we get a chance.
“Hey. Where’s the nugget?” My best friend asks.
“Sleeping. Don’t you start squealing and wake him up.” I announce, my back turned towards the door, standing on the step stool hanging another framed photo.
“Woman. I do not squeal.” I giggle at her indicative response.
“Oh, well then what do you call the noise you make when you….?” I turn to watch her expression shift to bright pink on her cheeks. When she doesn’t answer, I add.
“Well. It sure is a loud moan. We might have to work on some noise control in this house, or it is going to get awkward quick, especially when Rhett starts talking." Merrilee throws a decorative pillow at my back. “Hey. Tell me how this looks and stop playing around.”
“Jen, the room looks great as do the pictures of you, Ryan, and the baby hanging on the wall.” She reaches for my hand, pulling me down from my precarious position with one foot on the bed and one on the step stool. “Look, you have to stop worrying.”
“Mer. What if he isn’t excited about us moving here? What if he isn’t happy about the surprise wedding?”
“Jen. You forget who you are talking about, Ryan, remember? He loves you.” I ease down onto the bed hugging the pillow to my chest.
“Mer. We haven’t been together, you know in a year.”
Her face shudders with recognition, my worries apparent.
“Oh, honey. You are worried about intimacy?” I nod, the sharp rush of emotion pressing against my throat, burning the backs of my eyes. “Oh, Jen. I can guarantee he is counting down the days until you two can be together again.”
“What if he doesn’t like what he sees?” My best friend pulls me into her arms.
“Honey. He loves you. You are more beautiful today than you were a year ago. You are a mom. I know you worried about getting your body back in shape before we moved here. I promise you look amazing. Jen, you are wearing one size above what you were last year when Ryan graduated. And silly girl that is in the top because of your massive boobs. What man will not love those?” I giggle. Leave it to her to find a way to turn it around. “Girl, he is going to be completely gaga over you when he sees you in that dress.” I hope she is right.
“Okay.”
“Stop stressing. Your little porker of a son can do without you for one night so that his daddy can get all of the attention.” I laugh, allowing my best friend to help push away all my fears.
#
Ryan
I step off the cargo carrier, tired, hungry, and ready to touch American soil. Even my small shitty apartment is calling my name with beer and a hamburger, that is what I want. Then I need to find out how much leave I can arrange so that I might head straight to Pennsylvania to see Jenny and my son.
“Raines. What’s the first thing you are going to do?” I listen to Garcia, his plans involving the pretty brunette standing on the other side of the fence waving her arms. “Come over for dinner.”
“Nah. Thanks though. I have to get set-up to go see Jenny and the baby.”
“I can’t wait to meet them in person after you have talked about them non-stop for months.” I punch his arm. “Hey, now.”
“What like you didn’t talk about Isabelle every minute. Oh. My girl Belle makes the best steak. My girl rubs my back.” I purposely tease him, ignoring the sharp pain of longing watching soldier after soldier reunites with a loved one except me.
“Aww. Man, your time is coming.” I wave off my friend heading through the crowd of families when I hear the familiar sound of my name called.
“Ryan. Ryan.”
“Shit. Dad. What are you doing here?”
“Coming to see you, son.”
“How did you know?” He grins. His special insider. “Jenny?”
“Come on. Let’s go for a drive and talk.” My heart plummets to my stomach, fear of the unknown, what if she is through with me? The only possible reason for my dad is to break the news in person.
“Dad. Just tell me. Tell me she is okay.” My dad slaps me on the shoulder as I throw my bag into the back of his pick-up truck. “You drove over here?” He nods.
“Get in, son.” I hesitate, fearing the unknown and imagining the worse possible scenario. “Son. Look I promise it is nothing bad, but I can’t give you your surprise if you don’t get in the damn truck.”
We drive in silence, my dad ignoring my questions. His response is, “You will see.” We ride in silence, leaving the base turning away from my apartment, as I attempt to calm my quaking nerves.
“Dad, I need to make arrangements to see Jenny.” His shake of the head as he changes the subject pointing towards a nice park on the side of town I have never been.
“This is a nice area. Quiet and mostly military families from what I can gather.” His words spark a new curiosity replacing the fear, soon to realize my surprise when he parks his truck in front of a modest home with a large front porch towards the end of the street where a narrow waterway with several small boats moving in the distance. My eyes scan the neighborhood when my dad taps me on the shoulder, and a welcome home Ryan sign appears before my eyes.
“What. Wait. Dad?” We step from the truck, increasing my pace across the grassy lawn up to a slight incline to the driveway that holds both cars I recognize; Merrilee’s candy apple red sports car and Jenny’s matching SUV. My legs break into a run, hitting the bottom rung of the porch when the door opens to see my girl racing down the steps to leap into my arms. Her body molds to mine lip to lip, chin to chin, as I note the increased size of her breasts pressing against the rough cloth of the fatigues, I feel the heat of our combined bodies. Too long, much too long since I have held her in my arms all night. “Babe. What are you doing here? Whose house is this?”
“It is ours. Well, all of ours. Merrilee found a job here at the school not far from base, and I now am working full-time from home. And well, your dad.” Her voice drifts off as I observe the changing scene in front of me as my dad steps around us to take the steps two at a time not stopping until his arm circles my girl’s best friend’s waist. My brow lifts, eliciting a round of giggles from the girls. “We will explain.” Her slender fingers grip the buttons of my jacket.
“I don’t care about anything but the fact that you and Rhett are here, and I can see you every night.” Biting her lip.
“We were unsure. Your dad insisted it would not be difficult for you to move out of base housing to live here with me.” Her words trail off as Jenny rolls her bottom lip between her top row of teeth. My main thought at this time is when can I be alone with Jenny.
“Where’s Rhett?”
“He is asleep. Merrilee has a portable crib in her room if you want a chance to shower and to move in before he wakes from his nap.” I sense her nerves and the excitement of us two alone for the first time in much too long. I receive the short version of a tour; my attention lost when Jenny showed me our room. A good-sized bedroom with an attached bathroom, Rhett’s room next door and Jenny’s office on the other side of his room. Merrilee and Dad’s room, which I admit will take some time getting used to the idea is at the back of the house off the living room. “I hope you don’t mind sharing a house with them.” She straightens the thin cotton of her dress over her lap as I unpack my bag into the dresser. I do not have many belongings the apartment I have was furnished and other than two uniforms and some clothes I plan to move off base in the morning. Tonight, I have one thing on my mind, and that is Jenny.
“I don’t mind. If anything, knowing you are not here alone when I am gone will allow me to have peace of mind. I thought about you day and night for the longest time, all I want is to come home to you and our son.” My lips skate across hers, as my fingers trace the body, noting the changes, a slight fullness to her figure, the girl I see in my dreams every night. “I can’t believe you are really here.” I have dreamed about this woman since last year, and that has not changed. The dream has gotten better if that is possible because she is mine and I sleep each night assured that even when apart we are joined.
“Ryan, It’s…..” My fingers trace the silky line from beneath her ear along her cheek, with subtle pressure tilting her chin until her eyes meet mine.
“Hey, there is no reason to feel different about us together. I know it has been a while.” I choke off the words, tamping down the fire building from deep within, not wanting to rush.
“Ry, my body has changed since last year it’s not the same.” My fingers smooth over the rosy bottom lip from her nervous abuse.
“Jenny, I can imagine the pregnancy wasn’t easy, and I can’t begin to think how much it hurt for the delivery. One thing you never have to worry about is how I feel about you since then. I fall more in love with you each day. I love every inch of the curves of your body that weren’t there before.” She rolls her eyes, shaking her head. “Yes, I do because those are all signs that you are a Mom now. You suffered through each day of carrying my son because you love him and me. Don’t you see?
“But I have stretch….” I halt her words, the excuses of her insecurity with the touch of my lips, meeting her tongue with a tangled dance. “Ummm.” Oh yes. She wants me as much as I desire her. With trembling fingers, after months of anticipation building for this moment, I lift her pretty dress, sliding up her body and over her head.
“Oh, Jen.” The last comprehensible words I utter using my very being focused on touching, skin to skin, rekindling the fire we lit one year before in a small cabin in the woods of Pennsylvania, begins again, here in our new home, ours together. We build together a burning with the intensity to last a lifetime. We join soul to soul something more intense with a new level of passion much deeper and more meaningful; this time, those dreams of a future are now a reality, full of the promise of forever.
#
Ryan
Three days have passed since my dad picked me up from the base, filled with excitement and a round of busy activities. Our first night together was for Jenny and me to reconnect, making up for time lost. I would have been a happy man to spend the remainder of the day naked, connected to her forgoing sleep, or food. Our son had other ideas, and Merrilee was able to hold him off long enough for one bottle and some baby cereal before the little man insisted on drinking from the source. He had grown quite a bit since I left when he was still considered a newborn. Now Rhett changes daily, his attempt at crawling resembles the moves I made in basic training. He is a loud, demanding little thing, and I could not be any happier. Watching him with my dad warms my heart while the pangs of loss that my mother will never have the chance to meet my son.
My mini-me as Jenny calls him, laughs when he gets what he wants, his mommy’s undivided attention while she feeds him his bedtime snack. When the milk dots his lips, and his eyes drift in pure happiness, I take my son from his mother’s arms cradling him against my chest as I rock him gently before lowering him to his bed.
“You know Rhett tomorrow your mom is finally going to become my wife. I have waited a long time for this and you. To be here with you both is the best thing that could have ever happened to me.” I tuck my son into his bed, the baby monitor reflecting his soft snores as I curl up against Jenny pulling her close as my hand spreads against the soft flesh of her lower belly, which since my return I have learned she hates. I reminded her there was plenty of time for her to return to the sculpted figure of the girl before she awarded me with the most beautiful baby in the world. Jenny replied.
“Well, since I agree with you that we did make the most beautiful baby then yes he was worth every ounce of flub.” She giggled as I tickled my way down until I joined her body again, ready to give Rhett a baby brother or sister. We decided to wait for baby number two until my enlistment neared the end of the term. I never want to miss another moment of her pregnant or seeing my child grow.
Jenny succumbs to slumber long before me; motherhood has taught her to sleep when he is quiet. Me, on the other hand, the weight of the world on my shoulders. Tomorrow is the day I will pledge my love to Jenny, along with my dad and Merrilee had planned it down to the final detail, similar to the one I missed after graduation. I secured ten days leave this time, assuring this wedding will happen.
The next afternoon, I stand on the beach, white shirt, khaki pants, my toes grip the sand. My son is in Merrilee’s arms as Dad walks Jenny down the beach, her flowing dress graces the top of the sand teasing me with her bare pink toes to match the blush on her cheeks. Her hair, longer now, hangs in waves lifting from the soft breeze. The Marine chaplain takes us through the ceremony, joining us as husband and wife. A simple, elegant joining of two people who waited and found each other when life granted them the right time and place.
I asked my wife later that night in the hotel suite overlooking the Atlantic Ocean, while we sat on the patio her in my lap wearing nothing but a blanket. Our son a few rooms down with his grandfather and grandmother to be. I believe the idea of Merrilee as my future stepmother will take some getting used too, but for the way my dad smiles when his eyes meet hers, I am willing to try.
My fingers run through my wife’s hair as the moon and stars illuminate the waves crashing to shore.
“Babe did it bother you, your family not attending?” She shakes her head in the dark.
“No, I made my peace with the relationship a long time ago.” She lifts her head from my chest, the light of the full moon reinforcing everything she feels for me. “Ryan you, your dad, Merrilee, and our son and any future children we have are all the family I ever need.” The pad of my thumb swipes away the glistening tear. “The one person I would have loved to be here was my dad.”
“Babe. He was here. He saw how beautiful you looked today, and he knows what a wonderful woman you are. And you know the best part?” She sniffles.
“What?”
“He knows how happy we are together.”
Epilogue
Jenny
Six years later.
“Rhett, I need you to sit still and be quiet, okay? This is daddy’s big night, and we want him to be happy, deal?”
“Deal, Mommy.” Handing my son his small thermos with his juice and a divided container of snacks, hoping it will be enough to keep him occupied during the estimated two-hour long awards ceremony. Rob and Merrilee just walked in; I sigh a deep breath of relief for the added help. Especially if I need to make another run to the ladies’ room before this thing gets started. It seemed when my best friend jinxed me back when I gave birth to Rhett, swearing I was going to have a whole passel of boys, well Ryan got his wish. Baby number three is also a boy. I do believe this will be it, doubting my ability to keep up with one boy let alone three especially now that my husband’s career has taken off and he travels four months out of the year. Thank heavens for Merrilee and Rob, great help with babysitting when I have a deadline or a wedding to photograph. Rob moves backstage to stand next to his son while Merrilee takes the seat next to Rhett and me. Our second son Reece is at the hotel with the sitter, and well number three is not due for another four weeks, I hope.
