Past and Future, page 16
“They do, and Maria is hoping to use Exquisite as her bargaining tool.”
He smiles and then frowns. “She also knows her brother is in possession of that. Look, the reason for my visit is that I want you to let me know when she plans on meeting him.”
There’s an empty feeling in my stomach. My mind is racing, imagining all sorts of scenarios. Why would McGovern want to know this information?
“I can see you’re battling with my question. Here’s the thing; you and I both know what Steel is capable of, and even meeting him in a public place isn’t going to be enough to keep her safe. I know she’s cut off all ties to my world, so she won’t have the protection of any of the men who were loyal to Tony. She needs protection, and I can help with that.”
Rubbing my hands over my face, I know he’s right. I hate having to admit that. “What are you suggesting? And what do you gain from this?”
“Giovanni, you need to learn to trust me. At the meeting place, I will have some of my most trusted people in place, just as a precaution.”
I sit back, pondering over his words. “What do you want?”
He shakes his head. “Honestly, I want rid of Steel. Having him on the streets isn’t good for business. If my guys have the opportunity to take him out without putting anyone else at risk, that is all I want. I also want you to put this to Maria. I don’t want her being unprepared should my guys make an on the spot decision.”
“I can talk to her, but she’ll want Jack to be involved.”
“Well, that is where we have a problem. He and his officers will need to turn a blind eye to whatever happens. Look, we’re not naïve. We know that some girls turn to prostitution, but that has been their own choice. I do have some morals. I hate that Steel kidnaps, drugs, and puts underage girls to work or uses some for his own personal use. He leaves them with no choice. For everyone’s sake, he needs to go.”
McGovern’s statement makes total sense to me, but the hard part will be trying to convince Jack that he needs to turn a blind eye if he wants to keep Maria safe. “I need to speak to Jack before we make arrangements.”
“I totally understand and respect that,” he says, standing. “Keep me informed.”
He holds out his hand, which I shake as I stand too. “I will do, and thank you.”
“No need for thanks,” he says before leaving my office.
I know my sister wanted a fresh start, and I can’t blame her, but now I’m questioning if Jack, Joe and I are enough to ensure she’s safe. Yes, I do trust McGovern, but his men are a different story. I don’t know them. Although, I’m sure they are loyal to him and his family.
Picking up my phone, I call Joe. “Giovanni.” He says my name with an even tone.
“Joe, is there any news yet as to when Maria might be meeting Steel?”
“Not yet. He’s not in the country, but I’ve been informed he will get back to me personally upon his return to Glasgow. Why?”
“Because McGovern has just paid me a visit. He knows Maria plans on meeting with him.”
There’s a long silence. “Joe, what’s wrong?” I ask as alarm bells start ringing in my own head.
“If McGovern knows, someone in Steel’s camp must be talking. No one knows about this. But that would make sense because McGovern knows that Steel has an interest in both Maria and Lou. Someone is leaking or drip-feeding information and I don’t like that.”
“McGovern wants to put some of his men at the meeting to ensure Maria’s safety.”
“Giovanni, I’m going to be honest here. I don’t have a good feeling about any of this. McGovern wants Steel off the streets, but I’m not sure it’s worth risking Maria in the possible cross-fire.”
“I hear you, but I don’t think McGovern would do anything to put my sister at risk after what I did for his.”
“Let me have a think about all this to see if I can come up with a plan. Let’s face it, Jack isn’t going to be happy about any of this.”
“No, he won’t, but we also have to ensure he and his officers stay away from the meeting.”
He sighs. “Good luck with that. If there was any possibility of Lou being in danger, could you stay away?” His words hit home. Of course I couldn’t sit back and do nothing if Lou’s life was in danger. “Your silence tells me everything I need to know. Look, I’ll do what I can, but I think I need to meet with McGovern on my own to decide what’s best for Maria. I don’t want her put at risk and my job is to ensure she is protected at all times.”
“Thank you, Joe. You’re a good man, and I hope my sister appreciates what you do to keep her safe. I know I do.”
“I’m only doing my job. Leave this with me and I’ll get back to you.”
The call ends and I’m left staring into the openness of my office.
Old ways die hard.
I’ve fought for years to be the better man and I’ve earned the respect of family, friends, and associates. So why do I feel like now is a good time to fall back into old habits? Although, this time, I wouldn’t be working for Tony Fraser. This time around I’d be protecting my family.
And that’s all the reason I need.
Turning around, I enter the combination to the safe and open it. With the item in my hands, I carefully remove the material and then dust it down. My gun. It’s been a while since I’ve used it, but I think now it’s a necessity that I stand up for what I believe in.
This is one fight I’m more than ready for.
I put my gun back in the safe and lock it away safely. Now my dilemma is should I talk to Jack about what is going through my head, or keep it to myself?
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Lou
I climb into bed. I deserve an early night, and hopefully, I’ll get a decent night’s sleep. Maria isn’t the only one who looks tired, although she does have an excuse. A wee baby. I’m so pleased for her and Jack as they start their new life together. I wonder if they will get married before she has the baby. Jack would get married tomorrow if he could, so I’d imagine he will want to get married sooner now.
It’s all very exciting for her; a new man, a baby on the way, the club, and she’s already made plans to start renovating her parents’ house. Things are looking up and going in the right direction for Maria. And it’s about time it did. The girls will be thrilled when it’s time to share the news with them. They will love having a baby to fuss over.
Maria and I have always been close, but since finding out every dirty deed my brother had done, we’re much closer now. I hope it stays this way. I know the dynamics of our family and relationships will change, but I think, for the better.
Now, I just need to pull my thoughts together and sort myself out. I’m mentally punishing myself over my love for Giovanni, even when I know I shouldn’t. I’m causing myself more pain than I’ve already been through, and for what? Because I know, regardless of the time scale, I will be in his arms and his bed. We will be in each other’s lives for ever.
But it doesn’t matter what I know and feel, internally, I still feel as though I’m tarnishing Mark’s memory. Our time together as husband and wife, as a family.
I’m going around in a vicious circle, beating myself up about things I can’t change. My past can’t be changed, but if I don’t let go of it, my future is going to filled with nothing but sorrow and regret.
And that’s not what I want for me or the girls.
My phone buzzes on the table and I contemplate ignoring it, but I don’t. I smile, seeing his name illuminated on the small screen in my hand.
“Hi,” I say, answering.
“Good evening. I hope you’re well.”
“Yes. I’m in bed.”
“I didn’t wake you?” he asks, his formal tone evident, and I smile.
“No. I was just going to have an early night. The girls are tucked up and fast asleep.”
“Ah, I see. I was only calling to talk about the playhouse for them. I wanted to speak to you before I ordered one. I thought we could pick it out together. And before you say anything, I want this to be a gift to them from me.”
How thoughtful. “Giovanni, why do I think you’ve spent time looking at these already?”
“See, you do know me, and well. Yes, I’ve seen something I think is perfect, but I didn’t want to rush in. I didn’t want you to think I was taking over.”
“This is your home, and if you want to get the girls a gift, who am I to stand in your way? But please don’t buy them things for the sake of it. A child’s love can’t be bought.”
“That’s not…”
“I know it’s not, but I need to say this, for my own peace of mind. You already mean so much to them and no amount of gifts will change that.”
“I wish I was there with you all,” he says softly, making my heart ache.
“Come home then.”
“I don’t want to rush this, and if I’m honest, I’m scared that if I do I’ll push you away because of my intense feelings.”
“I’m not going anywhere. Not now, not ever. But you’re right, I don’t want to push our relationship on the girls straight away. I don’t want them to think that their dad meant nothing to me.”
“Ah, bella, they won’t think that. How about tomorrow after having dinner with me I come home, and when we get them tucked up into bed, we can talk about the future. I’ve already told you I’ll wait as long as I have to, providing I know we have a future together.”
Talking to him puts me at ease. I smile thinking about him being so patient with me. “Let’s take it one day at a time, starting with dinner tomorrow.”
“That is all I ask. You’ve made this man very happy. I’ll go and let you sleep. Until tomorrow. Goodnight, my love.”
“Goodnight,” I say softly as we end our call. I hold the phone close to my chest and shut my eyes with a smile on my face.
* * *
“Well, have you told him?” I ask Maria, as she stands before me looking so much better than she did yesterday.
“No. He stayed at his house last night. He and Craig were out late working on something that I’m not privileged to know about. I hate that he can’t discuss things with me. It’s reminding me of Tony.”
She tries to hide the brief sadness that has crept over her face, but I see it in her eyes. There’s no sign of that bright spark.
“You’re being stupid. This is nothing like Tony. Jack can’t discuss every case he works on with you. If he did and his superiors found out, can you imagine the trouble he’d be in? Maria… this is your hormones talking. Please don’t even begin to compare Jack to my brother. He’s nothing like him.”
“I know I’m being stupid, and of course Jack is nothing like Tony. I’ll just need to get used to the fact that there will be secrets between us.”
“Yes, you will, but only where his job is concerned. Now, I’ve had a think, and I’ll go to the meeting instead of you.”
She stares at me blankly and I can already sense what she will say. “Lou, now who is being stupid? There’s no way I’m letting you go and meet that man.” She shakes her head furiously. “No way. It’s not happening.”
“Maria, think about this, please. You can’t go and meet him in your condition. Giovanni has said you have Exquisite to bargain with. I’m not happy that he’s bought a club Tony owned but…”
“I can see that,” she says, smirking. I could easily be mad at him, but that would be pointless. He was only trying to ensure Maria wasn’t getting ripped off by McGovern or anyone else, but now it could be used. “Lou, I’m not convinced either of us should meet with Steel.”
“Well, we can think about it. Now, when I pick the girls up from school, we’re going for dinner with Gio, then he’s coming home.” Her eyes light up bright as she smiles. “Maria, don’t read too much into this.”
“Why not? You’re happier when he’s around. The girls are too.”
I find myself sighing. “I love Giovanni, I really do, but I should be grieving for my husband. Instead, I’m fighting against my feelings for your brother.”
She pulls me into her hold, and with my eyes welling with tears, I rest my head on her shoulder. “So, stop fighting your feelings then.” She studies me for a moment, and I don’t know what to say to her. “I’m sorry. I’m being insensitive. I just want to see my brother and best friend happy. And I know you’ll only have true happiness with each other. Everything will work out.”
“I hope so. Now, let’s hope that my meeting with the counsellor goes well.”
“It will. What about the meeting at school? What time is your appointment?
“Two- thirty. I can’t believe this was the first I could get.”
“Are you sure you want to go to the club? You have a lot on already,” she says with her eyebrows raised.
“Yes, of course. Steve and I will drop the girls off at school and nursery. Then I’ll be there after I’ve seen the counsellor, then I’ll leave for the meeting at the school. I’ve managed to get Daisy extra time at nursery. Two full days a week on top of the three afternoons.”
“That will be good for her.”
“I know. Now, go and let me get these two sorted and I’ll see you when I get there.”
“See you soon.”
She walks out the door and I smile, walking toward the kitchen. I think today is going to be a good day. Roll on three-thirty, when I see Giovanni.
* * *
What a day it’s been, and in a good way. The counsellor didn’t judge me, and if she did, it certainly didn’t show. She was understanding, and I’m surprised by how much of my life I told her. I’ll be seeing her on a weekly basis. She wants to help me overcome all my fears. And the meeting at the school went better than I expected. Turns out the teacher and head teacher were well aware of what was happening and had already spoken to all the kids and their parents in connection with everything that was being said to Rebecca. One parent actually came to me today and apologised. That shocked me, but I accepted.
Hopefully now, things will settle down at school for Rebecca and she’ll start looking forward to it.
The girls are excited, and if I’m honest with myself, they’re not the only ones. I lift Daisy from the car and put her down on the pavement, taking her hand straight away. We’re outside the restaurant and the street is busy with cars. Rebecca knows all about the dangers of the roads, but Daisy is still too young to fully understand.
“I’ll see you tomorrow morning,” Steve says with a smile.
“Yes, and thank you, for everything. I know I’m not the easiest person in the world and you seem to be stuck with me.”
“I can think of worse.” He laughs before getting back into the car.
“Will we go inside and have some dinner?” I say to the girls.
“Yes, but will Giovanni be here too?” Rebecca asks.
“Of course he will. Come on.” I lead the way nervously, although I’m hoping it doesn’t show.
Opening the front door, a small wave of panic rips through me. The last time I was here was the day of Mark’s funeral. I try to push the thoughts from my head because I don’t want my life to be filled with sadness. When I think about Mark, I want to remember good times.
“A table for three?” a young girl asks me with a big smile and menus already in her hand.
“Erm, no. We’re here…”
“Lou. Kids.” Giovanni’s voice rescues me from embarrassing myself. He crouches down before us. The girls, calling his name, launch themselves into his open arms. I stand and watch, overwhelmed at the scene before me. He wraps his arms around them, and keeping a tight hold of them, stands. The girls are giggling in his arms.
“Emily.” Giovanni speaks to the waitress. “I can take it from here.”
“But I thought you were finished for the day, Mr DeLuca?”
“Yes, I am. The four of us are having an early dinner before going home. So, you’re in charge until Marcus gets in.”
“Very good,” Emily says before turning her back.
“You’re coming home?” Rebecca asks, leaning back in his arms, studying his face.
“Come on, Little Miss,” I say, taking Daisy from him, leaving him to answer Rebecca.
“Yes. We can all go home together. Have you been behaving for your mum?” he asks as he leads the way to a table that is all set for us, including drinks.
I listen to easy and free-flowing conversation between the two of them and I’m left with no doubts that my daughter loves him very much and is looking forward to spending more time with him.
Rebecca isn’t the only one.
Now I just need to enjoy our early evening dinner before we go home.
Home. I love the sound of that.
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Giovanni
“Mummy, can Giovanni tuck us in?” Rebecca asks, while Daisy jumps up and down beside her.
“Girls, don’t you think Giovanni might have had enough of you two for one night?”
“Lou, it’s fine. I’ll tuck them into bed and you can go and have a shower,” I say. The girls smile, happy with my answer.
“Are you sure?” she asks.
“I wouldn’t offer if I wasn’t. Go.” She smiles, leaving the comfort of the living room. Rebecca jumps into my arms.
“Now, it’s bedtime for you because I know someone who has school tomorrow and also someone who is going to nursery.” They both giggle, although Rebecca’s eyes narrow for the briefest of seconds and I’m reminded that she’s not been having a good time at school. “How about I take you to school tomorrow?”
“Yes!”
“Okay, then take your sister upstairs and get ready for bed. Brush your teeth and I’ll tuck you in, and I’m sure Mummy will come in and kiss you both goodnight.”
Rebecca takes her sister’s hand and they leave the room. It’s been nice spending time with them, and it’s made me realise I’ve missed them so much.
It’s time for me to come home. I don’t need to spend my nights alone in the city when I have all the family I need and want here. Yes, I know that anything with Lou and I will take time. We’ll need our relationship to develop slowly because I don’t want the children to feel as though I’m trying to replace their dad.
