Past and Future, page 11
“A toast to my beautiful friend and the best sister I could ever have wished for. You, Maria DeLuca…” She smiles at my use of her maiden name. “… are one of the strongest people I know, and I hope that, through time, I can at least have half your strength.”
“We’re strong because we have each other.”
We take a drink and I try and not focus on me being strong because, at the moment, I’m anything but. I could crumble at any moment with all the pressure I feel and I’m sure Maria knows this.
“What time are you opening the doors?”
“Eight, and I’m so nervous. What will I do if no one shows up?”
“Oh, Maria, that is not going to happen. You and I sent out the invites and you know as well as I do that over ninety percent accepted. Crave will be packed tonight, and you… all you have to do is enjoy and mingle with the crowd.”
“You make it sound so easy.”
“It is. Now, do you want me to do anything?” I ask, hoping she has something that can keep me busy.
“No, just keep me comp… wow.” Her eyes dart behind me and I turn around to see Jack and Giovanni walking toward us. They both look mighty fine all dressed to impress. Jack is in complete awe. His eyes are only on Maria, and who can blame him?
“You look incredible,” he says, taking her in his arms and nuzzling her neck.
“Giovanni,” I say as he stares at me.
He leans over and kisses me on both cheeks. I can almost feel the tension roll from him in waves.
“Hi, Lou. You look… well. How are you?”
A deep ache fills my chest. His voice is more formal than I hoped for. I’m not sure what I had hoped for, but after not seeing him this week, I’ve missed him and I thought, maybe, just maybe he’d miss me.
“I’m getting there. How are you?”
“Glad to have a night off and to see you.”
I’m sure my mouth opens and forms a perfect ‘O’. My heart races and goosebumps spread quickly over my skin. He’s taken me by surprise and I’m not sure what to say or do. “Don’t look so surprised. I’ve missed you and the children this past week,” he tells me, leaving me somewhat speechless. My eyes dart to Maria, and if she heard anything Giovanni said, she’s hiding it well. Or rather, she’s too busy with Jack.
“Gio!” My voice is a warning, and I’m not sure if it’s for me or him.
“Okay, let’s get you both a drink,” Maria says, pulling out of Jack’s hold. She casts her eyes over her brother and smiles. I’m not quite sure what she’s approving of, but I get the impression she is.
Or maybe I’m overthinking, again. Let’s face it, it’s not the first time and it won’t be the last. It’s all I seem to be doing lately.
“Drinks, and I think you, my dear sister, need to show me around,” Giovanni says, looking around the bright openness of the main area. Although, it won’t be bright for long when the lights are dimmed. The DJ is behind the decks, if anyone even calls them that anymore. I’m sure it’s all done by computers, and the music starts playing.
Maria signals for a waiter, but Jack and Giovanni don’t want champagne and they move toward the bar and order drinks.
Maria grabs my arm. “You’ll be okay with them both tonight? Keep them out of trouble for me whilst I’m mingling, as you put it.”
“Of course I will. But don’t expect me to stay until the wee small hours.”
“I’m not expecting much. I’m just glad you’re here with me tonight.”
“Me too,” I say on a sigh.
As much as it’s taken all my energy, I really wouldn’t have missed tonight. It’s a huge milestone in her life and one I’m pleased to share with her, but in my heart, it doesn’t feel right for me to be out celebrating. It’s too soon.
“Are the girls okay?” she asks.
I smile. “Yes. Teresa had lots planned for them. The three of them were all in pjs when I left, and a big blow up mattress was on the living room floor. A party for three. I did try to tell Teresa not to give them too many sweets. Her reply was, ‘Go out and enjoy your night. Leave me to worry about the kids.’”
“That sounds like Teresa, although I’ve never seen her in pjs,” she says, laughing. “So, you, lady, have to do what you’re told relax and enjoy tonight. Dance and get drunk.”
I frown at her. I’m not sure either of those things are a good idea. Dancing will make me look as though I’m enjoying myself and getting drunk might make me upset.
We join Jack and Giovanni at the bar, who were deep in conversation, but they stop talking as we arrive. Maria and I exchange glances. Is there something they’re keeping from us? I hope not. Haven’t either of them learned recently that keeping secrets is not a good idea?
We chat about how the week has gone. It’s refreshing to hear their stories now that they’re all back at work. Jack tells us work is quiet and boring. An expression crosses his face that tells me that it’s maybe too quiet for him. He’s used to dealing with the darkest side of the criminal underworld.
Although, I’m sure there will be someone, somewhere, willing to step into Tony’s and Pete’s shoes and take on the running of the underworld; the girls, the drugs, the pointless fighting. My skin prickles at the thought, but I don’t have to worry about mine or Maria’s involvement anymore.
We both got out and we’re both alive.
And that alone is worth thanking God for.
“Maria.” Joe calls her name, approaching us. “Evening. You have guests who want to see you.”
“I suppose I should go and do some mingling,” she says, putting her glass on the bar. “Will you all be okay? Giovanni, Lou can give you a tour.”
I’m going to ignore what she just said, and I hope Giovanni does the same.
“Go,” Jack says, kissing her on the cheek.
She smiles and walks away with Joe.
“Jack, maybe you should go with her,” I say.
“Maybe later. I don’t want to put the guests off as soon as they see me, the DCI. It usually puts people off,” he says with a smirk, taking a drink.
“I can vouch for that,” I say, remembering my reaction to Maria seeing him.
“Let’s go and grab a table before there are none left,” says Giovanni, and I look around, taking note of the number of people now in the club. And Maria had doubts that tonight would be a success.
Jack leads the way to a table, and when I sit down, it doesn’t go un-noticed that from where we are, he has a full view of the dance floor, the bar, and toward the entrance. And he wonders why him being a DCI puts people off. Always on the job. I sit and watch Maria as she moves around the room, being introduced to many of her guests. Joe is with her, and it has to be said, he looks extremely comfortable in his role.
Before, I always thought of Joe as just another heavy that worked for my brother, but that’s not what he is. He’s an incredibly good man with a heart of gold and he has a lot of time for Maria; that’s very clear. And not in the sick, twisted way Pete had.
I shake that thought from my head because tonight is meant to be filled with happiness, not sadness. I turn back to my handsome company for this evening.
“Are you back with us?” Giovanni asks, handing me another glass of champagne.
“Of course. I was just watching Maria and thinking.”
“Thinking what?” Jack asks.
I shake my head. “Nothing important.”
They glance at each other, and I can tell neither is happy with my answer.
“Okay. A toast. To family,” Giovanni says, raising his glass. Jack and I do the same and I smile at Giovanni. Being around him is both easy and terrifying. I shouldn’t feel so nervous, especially when he has been such a good friend to me. Not just me, but he’s helped with the girls so much since Mark’s death.
“Are you dancing?” Jack asks.
I can’t help but laugh as I reply, “Are you asking?”
“You know that’s as old as time?” Giovanni says, and we’re all now laughing at a very old Glasgow way of asking someone to dance.
“I might dance later.”
We all sit talking, and Jack asks us about Maria as she was growing up. I watch on as Gio’s face lights up, re-telling some childhood stories. I’m not sure Maria will thank him for this. But as I fill in a few blanks, warmth spreads through my body. I’m actually enjoying sitting here and reminiscing about years gone by. When life was easy and none of us had a care in the world. And Jack, well, he’s enjoying learning about his wife-to-be.
“You’re smiling,” Giovanni says to me.
“It’s funny, I have been known to smile.”
“Yes, you have, but it’s been missing lately.”
“Sorry,” I find myself saying softly as my eyes fall to the drinks on the table.
“Enough.” It’s Jack’s voice that cuts through the air. “Tonight is about fun.”
I offer him a smile. “Okay, then I think I need more alcohol, especially if you want me to dance.”
“I’ll go and grab us more drinks and check on Maria.” Jack stands, his eyes darting between Giovanni and me. “Will you two play nice whilst I’m gone?”
“Go!” I shake my head and wave him away. He wanders toward the bar. “I do wish everyone would…” I stop myself from finishing the sentence because it would make me sound like an ungrateful bitch.
“Stop pushing us together? Is that what you were going to say?” Giovanni says the words I stopped myself saying. My body tenses and I’m sure the smile I try to offer is filled with sadness. “Lou, don’t look like that. I was only saying what we were both thinking. Look, for what it’s worth, I’m sorry.”
“Sorry for what?”
“For making things more difficult than they are already are between us.”
“It isn’t.”
He holds his hand up, one finger brushing against my lips as he urges me to stop talking. “It is and it has been since before Mark’s death. I hate that I’m causing you upset,” he says, his finger still lingering over my lips.
The feel of him so close has me shivering. My eyes close briefly as I try to take stock of my overwhelming feelings scorching through my veins like a wild fire.
Opening my eyes, I pick up my drink. His finger glides across my now very sensitive lips before he reaches out for his own drink. I take a large gulp of my champagne, hoping that my nerves aren’t on show.
“Gio, please…”
“I’m not going to make things any harder than they are between us. That’s one of the reasons I think I should continue to stay at my apartment, leaving you and the girls at the estate.”
“That’s silly. It’s your home, not mine,” I say, putting my glass down.
“Yes, but I’d much rather you were there. All this talk about you moving out, and yes, Steve has mentioned it. You can’t uproot the kids at the moment. You’re all facing enough challenges without moving. And at least if you’re there, I’ll know you’re all safe.”
There’s that word again.
“Safe? Why wouldn’t we be safe?”
“It’s not that you’re not safe. Of course you are. It’s just… Bloody hell, Lou. I want to protect you. I want to support you. I want to be the one you lean on in times of darkness. But I’m well aware that with the history between us, it might be difficult.” He takes my hands, covering mine with his. “We both have demons we’re fighting against, but you’re the one person in the world I don’t want to hurt because…”
Chapter Twenty
Giovanni
As I hold her hands and stare into her eyes, I can’t say the words that are on the tip of my tongue. She doesn’t need to know how I feel about her, not now. I shouldn’t be playing with fire. This isn’t how life is meant to go.
There has to be a reason she’s come back into my life. But why? The powers above shouldn’t be dangling temptation before my eyes. There’s only so much I can take.
“What?” she asks, and I can see the confusion that fills her eyes.
“Nothing,” I say, still with my hands in hers. I don’t want to let her go, but I know I need to. That thought alone saddens me. Fuck. Look at the state of me, a grown man losing my damn mind over the only woman in the world I’ve loved and lost.
“Gio, are you okay?” she asks, her voice laced with beauty and concern.
“Of course.” I rub my hands over hers before releasing my hold of her. Instantly, like I knew I would, I miss her soft hands in mine. “Tonight is all about having fun and I don’t want you stressing about living arrangements. We’ll make it work so you and the kids are comfortable and settled.”
She smiles, almost shyly, turning her head away. I follow her gaze and see Jack coming back with a tray of drinks; beers and what looks like a cocktail and shots.
“Drinks,” Jack says, placing the tray down. Lou and I exchange glances. “What?”
“Nothing,” I reply, shaking my head as he hands Lou a shot.
All this alcohol might not be a good idea, especially when it’s added into the pot of bubbling feelings.
“I’m not sure this is a good idea,” she says, voicing her concerns.
“Nonsense. A few drinks and a shot aren’t going to do any harm.” He hands me a glass. “Okay. Three, two, one.”
We all throw the drinks down the back of our throats. It burns as it slides down. Lou makes a face and shakes her head. I don’t think she liked the taste of it and I don’t blame her. It’s awful.
“Jack McKenzie, that was the worst thing I’ve ever tasted,” she tells him. “You’re not allowed to be in charge of drinks for the rest of the night.”
“I have to agree,” I say. We laugh at him, and all he can do is smile and shrug his shoulders.
We sit back and continue talking and drinking. Lou questions Jack on when the wedding will be.
“That depends on you and Maria.”
“Oh!” Lou looks surprised. “Sorry. I’d better get my act together then, so she doesn’t keep you waiting.”
“Don’t be sorry. I’d run away tomorrow and get married in Gretna Green, but I know she wants you there with her.”
“There will be no running away,” I interrupt. I don’t think Maria will opt for a big wedding this time around, but I do know my sister, and she’ll want something intimate with those closest to her.
“Well, I think you should push her for a date,” Lou says, casually taking a sip of the cocktail Jack placed before her. “Because regardless of how I am, all I want for Maria is to see her happy, and you, DCI, make her happy. And, anyway, I have my own selfish reason for you two to tie the knot.”
“What’s that?” Jack asks.
“I want to be an auntie, and Maria will be the best mum ever.”
“Let’s try one step at a time,” Jack says with a huge smile.
Of course he’d want kids, and I agree with Lou; Maria will make a great mother.
Conversation flows with ease between the three of us. Jack has the perfect view of the whole club and his eyes stay on my sister as she moves around, speaking to everyone, being the perfect host. We’re in the middle of a conversation when I see Jack tense. I try to remain calm when my gaze follows his. My sister is standing face to face with Frank Steel. He said he’d be here, but I was hoping we wouldn’t see his face amongst the crowd.
“That bastard. I’ll fucking kill him.”
Jack pushes out of his seat.
“Guys, what the hell is going on?” Lou demands.
“I’ll tell you, I promise, but not here,” I say to her. “Jack, please try and remain calm because he doesn’t know that we know.”
He takes a deep breath and walks toward Maria. I watch as he wraps his arms protectively around her waist and kisses her neck when he reaches her. From here, I can see Frank Steel smirking. Maria introduces Jack to him and the two shake hands. I wish I was closer to them so I can hear what’s being said. Steel looks confident, so damn sure of himself.
“Giovanni, you have some explaining to do,” says Lou, bringing my thoughts back to her.
I inch closer to her and put my arm around the back of the seat. All I want to do is pull her body to mine, to hold her and protect her from the threat she doesn’t know exists, although she’ll learn of it soon enough. She stares at me, silently questioning me to tell her what I know. I know I should, but Jack and I need to tell them together.
“I promise we’ll tell you everything,” I say, keeping my voice calm.
We should’ve told them as soon as we knew. They’re going to be mad, and I don’t blame them.
She moves closer to me and takes my free hand. Her body shakes and I wrap my arm around her shoulder. It takes her a few minutes to relax. Looking into her eyes, I see a mixture of feelings. She’s scared. I’m fighting my inner demons, trying hard not to show my own emotions. But it’s damn hard when she’s here in my arms. Where I’ve wanted her for so long.
“I’ve mingled with everyone, now I get to let my hair down and enjoy…” I turn to Maria’s voice and she’s staring, confusion sweeping across her features, and I know if Lou speaks now, Maria will know something is wrong. “What’s going on?”
Lou takes a deep breath. “Nothing. I was just feeling a bit emotional,” Lou says, covering for us.
Jack frowns at me, but for now, I’m happy to go with whatever Lou says. “But now, if my friend is joining us for the rest of the evening then I think she and I should dance.” Lou surprises me by pulling from my hold, standing, grabbing Maria’s hand, and strolling to the dance floor. Maria glances back over her shoulder and I offer her a smile. I hope my sister doesn’t see through it.
“What the fuck is going on? Have you told Lou?”
“No, but she does know something is wrong. We do have to tell them tonight, when he isn’t around.”
“We’re going to stay at my house. I can tell Maria then.”
“I’ll take Lou home to the estate and tell her, but we need to try and enjoy the rest of the night. This can’t ruin tonight. Maria has worked too hard and this news will be hard for them both to take.”
