Love and Music (Small Town Secrets Book 3), page 15
She put the picture back in her wallet. “It’s a shame his father’s not a part of his life.”
Something inside me grew angry, as if magma were brewing in the pit of my gut, preparing to erupt. I wanted to shake the shit out of Tamara for more reasons than I could articulate. So why I asked the question I did, I’d never understand. “Does he know?”
Arching an eyebrow before looking toward Tyler on the stage, she then turned back to me when she spoke. “Of course, he knows. He doesn’t want anything to do with Tyson.”
Madversary ended their song and an eruption of cheers bloomed behind us. There would be no opportunity at the moment for me to dispute or argue Tamara’s accusations. Tyler’s voice, booming through the mike, filled the gym. “Thanks, everyone. Some of the bigger venues we’ve been to over the past year couldn’t hold a candle to you.” After the next wave of applause died down, Tyler’s voice sounded more serious. “I haven’t had the chance the reconnect with all of you guys, but I have to say it’s been great seeing all of you again. I’d really like to talk to each one of you at some point—unless you’re sick of me already.” Half the audience laughed at his joke before he continued. “There is one person I’ve reconnected with while I’ve been here that I know some of you have noticed.” Oh, shit. “Megan Walker, would you mind coming up on the stage for a bit?”
At that moment, I could have killed him. Tyler knew how much I hated attention and the spotlight. That was his thing, not mine—but I couldn’t very well tell him to fuck off while a majority of our classmates were watching. In my distress, I didn’t notice at first that Tamara had disappeared like a cockroach runs from the light.
Trying to force a smile on my face and probably failing, I made my way to the stage. I heard several encouraging comments and even felt a pat on the back before I realized it was Lisa practically pushing me toward the side of the stage where the steps were. As I put a foot on the bottom tread, I was surprised at how bright the lights were on this side, so I was grateful to the lead guitarist when he stuck his hand out to help me up the rest of the way.
Soon, I was standing next to Tyler, feeling more awkward than I had in my entire life—including the time I had a pimple that felt like a boil on the side of my nose my junior year…and also including the time I read an entire book the night before a big test in one of my literature classes in college—only to find out during our discussion I’d read the wrong fucking book. Yep, this moment topped those easily.
At least I learned how makeup could camouflage imperfections and I definitely figured out not putting off homework till the last minute—and also double checking assignments.
But there was nothing to learn from Tyler putting me on the spot, except that maybe the man wanted to add insult to injury. I pursed my lips as he draped an arm over my shoulders. “You guys all remember Megan?”
Looking out at the crowd under the lights, I couldn’t see shit. The sea of darkness was just a huge black blob, swarming like insects. I couldn’t make out any faces as I scanned the audience, with the exception of the folks mashed up against the foot of the stage. A hot flush crawled up my neck, making my cheeks flame from the attention, and the way the audience applauded told me many of them remembered me.
Or was that response simply for Tyler’s sake?
“I’ve had a great time the past two days, and I’d forgotten how much I liked growing up in Winchester. I guess I’ve missed home—but, maybe like some of you, I also realized how much I’d missed some special people.”
The heat flared in my cheeks again, but I figured no one out in the audience would be able to see it—unless it was even more obvious under those damned lights. I just wished Tyler would shut up already and let me scurry off the stage.
“There’s a song we’ve been working on for our next album, but I’ve been reworking the lyrics. Let’s just say I’ve been inspired.” Tyler looked directly at me then, his eyes boring into my soul. It would have been so easy to drown in them, so I remembered his words earlier, hoping they’d keep me grounded: There’s no point to any of it. Recalling the way he’d said it—the smirk on his face, the glint in his eye—would help me get through this fucking moment, no matter what else he said.
I’d happened to forget something else he’d said to me until he repeated it onstage. “This song’s for you, Megan Walker.”
Oh, what the hell? I felt a shiver run all through my body, and I considered running away—but I knew that would go over as well as a bride leaving the alter in the middle of her wedding. As I heard a general aww swell in the audience, I knew they wanted this, even if they didn’t actually care about Tyler or me—or Tyler and me, for that matter. Sometimes people wanted romance and they wanted to believe in the fantasy at all costs.
So I’d give it to them.
As the band started playing, I had to admit to myself that I liked the tune. It wasn’t a ballad; it was just a regular hard rock song, one that would probably get plenty of airtime on the radio. I realized one other thing before Tyler started singing and decided I’d bail immediately if I suspected anything foul—because what if Tyler chose to air his grief at being dumped in a song? Or some other weird shit?
With those thoughts in mind, I knew I’d have to listen not just to the literal meanings of the words but also any potential hidden messages. I was super self-conscious up there, feeling like a bug under a microscope, but now at least I had a mission—which made the next four excruciating minutes much more tolerable.
The words in the song, taken at face value, seemed harmless enough. It was about friends. Some come and go while others are silent but always nearby. As Tyler continued singing, I relaxed a little but also knew that sometimes the biggest punchlines come when you’re least expecting them. At the end, though, I felt a huge relief, accompanied with the urge to vomit—but I was able to contain it. The song’s lyrics were sweet and I’d have to hear it a few more times to really extract the message. For the moment, though, I didn’t think Tyler had delivered any subliminal blows to me.
Unexpectedly, Tyler kissed me on the cheek. “Hey, guys, I’m gonna let Megan off the hook now. As it is, she’s probably gonna kill me for calling her up here.” He had that right. “Thanks for being a good sport.” Before I could run off, though, he slid the guitar over his shoulder so it rested against his back and pulled me into a hug.
Why the fuck did he do that? I’d been dealing with all this shit fine, but now he had to remind me of just how much I was physically attracted to him. It didn’t help that the crowd loved the idea of us as a couple.
Fortunately, I had a little moral support at the bottom of the stage. I hadn’t noticed Lisa and Randy much at the beginning of the concert but they were there for me now. As Madversary started playing what they said would be their last song of the evening, Lisa gave me a hug. “How does it feel to have someone sing a song they wrote for you?”
“Don’t ask.”
Lisa’s forehead wrinkled her brow. “But I did.”
I refrained from rolling my eyes. “You didn’t hear what he said to me earlier. Let’s just say the song is fucking bullshit and I hate being part of it.”
“Holy shit, Meg. And did I also see Tamara, Princess of Darkness, spewing poison on you?”
Raising my eyebrows, I nodded—but I wasn’t ready to start shouting at her over the song all the weird shit that had happened tonight. Sunday night, Lisa and I had a date with a couple of pints of Ben & Jerry’s, my go-to pain relief.
I knew and loved the song Madversary was playing, “Kerosene Sunday,” and since that song had always had a great high school vibe, it was the perfect way to end a concert for a reunion. But I just wasn’t feeling it—not by a long shot.
Soon, Penny was back onstage doing her thing. “Now we’re going to start a traditional dance!” There was a lot of energy in the crowd and some cheering, so it was hard to hear her next words. “Give us a few minutes while Madversary breaks down and the DJ sets up. In the meantime, we have punch and cookies on that side of the gym. Be forewarned, classmates! One of the punch bowls is spiked, just like the good ol’ days—but it’s clearly marked. Drink as much as you like. We’ll keep it comin’.” Some of our classmates were already moving from the audience over to the refreshments area, while the band started moving their equipment off the stage—but Penny wasn’t done talking. “The DJ has been instructed to play songs that were popular back when we were in school—but she’s got a variety of music, so if you have a request, just let her know.”
Suddenly, we were bathed in the harsh bright lights overhead that were usually on during basketball games, highlighting how dark it had been earlier. Penny was stepping off the stage and the band was engaged in unhooking amps while my classmates were disbursing throughout the gym, awaiting the dance. As my eyes adjusted, I saw one person moving against the crowd.
Tamara Dickens.
Apparently, I had become her new best friend over the course of twenty-four hours—and it seemed as though she was never going to leave me alone again.
Chapter Nineteen
“What the fuck? Are you kidding me?”
Lisa, for a change, wasn’t immersed in Randy, instead looking in the direction I was. “Oh, my God. What does that skank want now?”
Turning to face Lisa, I hoped to give Tamara the hint that I wasn’t interested in talking to her. “I have no fucking idea—and I can’t figure out if she’s completely psychotic or if I’m so biased towards her that I’m not giving her a fair chance.”
Lisa lowered her voice. “Well, they say if it walks like a psycho and quacks like a psycho…” Her eyes shifted from mine to behind me, so I knew Tamara was there long before I felt the annoying tap of her bony finger on my shoulder.
I rolled my eyes and sighed for Lisa’s benefit before attempting to adjust my expression to one that would appear more neutral before turning around to face Tamara—and the woman didn’t even give me a chance to address her before she started talking. “Have you had a chance to think about what I told you?”
Try as I might to give her the benefit of the doubt, I felt anger beginning to stir in my blood. “What exactly do you expect me to do with that information?
Tamara’s light blue eyes grew wide in what appeared to be feigned shock—but what did I know? I truly didn’t know the woman well enough to assess her emotional state nor her acting abilities. “I’m just trying to protect you, Megan.”
“I don’t need protection. I know how to take care of myself.” And, frankly, I didn’t see how what she’d told me would protect me from anything—whether that information had been true or not.
My bestie had had enough and moved to stand beside me. “Look, Tamara, we’re trying to have some fun here, and you’re kind of bringing down the mood. Why don’t you go crawl back into whatever hole you slithered out of?”
This time, Tamara’s smile looked as fake as I knew it was, and her face paled as if she was going to be sick—but her words sounded as sweet as frosting on a birthday cake. “Lisa French. What a pleasant surprise.”
“You’re not gonna think so in a few seconds. Why’d you even come to this damned reunion if you don’t want to just have fun and enjoy yourself?”
“Who says I’m not?”
These two women wouldn’t even let me get a word in edgewise.
“Well…go enjoy yourself with other people. You’ve worn out your welcome here.”
Tamara scoffed—but she did as Lisa suggested, backing up as if she didn’t dare avert her eyes from us. But a scowl marred her face as she stared my friend down. “Bitch.” Pausing, she opened her mouth, closed it, then opened it again as if fighting some invisible force. “For your information, Tyler was fucking me while he was fucking you. We might have broken up, but he couldn’t keep his hands off me.” Then she turned on her heel and stormed off into the crowd.
I was speechless. She’d already said all this shit. Why couldn’t she just leave me alone?
“What the fuck is up with her?”
“I have no idea.” I felt a little relief that Randy had moseyed off to find the spiked punch, leaving us alone for a bit.
“Is what she said about Tyler true?”
I shook my head, looking at my friend. “I don’t know.”
“If it is…wow. What a fucking dick.”
It wasn’t the first time over this weekend that I’d felt confused, and I knew I’d have to clear the air with Tyler—because, if what Tamara had said was true, maybe having that conversation would help me take off those rose-colored glasses all the way. No friends with benefits while he was in town, no fond remembrances of our times together. Maybe this was the information I needed to move on for good.
Perhaps Tamara really was trying to protect me—from myself.
Lisa said, “I’m starting to think she never got over Tyler.”
That made two of us.
* * *
As soon as the DJ started playing music, Lisa and Randy were on the dance floor. My friend was a great dancer, and anytime she could combine cardio and music, she was a happy girl.
That meant, though, that I was alone again. I needed to talk to Tyler but the chances of being found by Tamara first were high. I saw some of the band’s instruments and equipment on the side of the stage—they’d managed to get it out of the DJ’s way but hadn’t quite finished their task. It seemed as though half of our class was talking to the band and even getting autographs, slowing down their progress.
So I was struggling internally with thoughts and emotions that seemed overwhelming. Was what Tamara said true? Did Tyler have a son he wanted nothing to do with? Had he slept around on me while we’d been together? I realized all of those scenarios were possible. Tyler and Tamara had dated for a few months before he and I got together—and then, when I broke it off with him, it wasn’t long before Tamara vulturishly stuck her claws back in him. Or maybe that was just what I’d thought. Back then, I’d just figured that I’d broken Tyler’s heart and he’d found comfort in the arms of an old girlfriend—but, if what Tamara was saying was true, he wouldn’t have been returning to her at all. He would have simply made their relationship public again.
There was no doubt that Tamara’s puzzle box was shy a few pieces—but that didn’t necessarily mean she was a liar in this case. Thus, my internal struggle.
Bored and anxious, I wandered over to the refreshment table and stared at both punchbowls. Both were a bright red color and looked exactly the same. Did I want to be sober for my conversation with Tyler or would a little nip take the edge off, making it easier to say what needed to be said? I picked up a clear plastic cup, still not sure what I wanted to do.
I sensed rather than saw Tyler at first. He came up beside me, his shirt once again covering his torso. “Now I think I’ve officially talked to everyone at the reunion.”
“Ah, the problems of being a celebrity. I’m pretty sure you agreed to perform here tonight, right?”
“I wasn’t complaining.”
Sarcasm festered in my belly like a thorn in the toe. Maybe skipping the alcohol would be for the best. My tone was dry, but the words could have easily been mistaken for a serious statement. “Oh, okay.”
Tyler got closer to me but continued eyeing the punchbowls. “It’s pretty noisy here. What do you say we find someplace quiet to talk?”
Oh, God, was he going to be disappointed—because I had a shit ton to talk about, and not necessarily the shit he wanted to talk about.
But I got the vibe that talk was a euphemism for something else entirely.
I looked up at him, immediately regretting it, because he still looked extra yummy after that damned performance. He was like the platter of turkey at Thanksgiving dinner—hot, steamy, scrumptious looking.
And, suddenly, I was eager to feel stuffed.
Tamara’s words and all my hesitations about what Tyler had said earlier in the evening evaporated from my memory as he took my hand in his and started walking. “We could go outside, but there are tons of people out there.” He began scanning the entire room, looking at all the exit signs, and I began wondering if he really did just want to talk. He’d been yakking for a while with our fellow classmates and maybe just needed an audience of one now.
But he’d figured something out, because he began leading me back toward the stage. Only he didn’t quite make it there. Turning, he led me through a gap between the bleachers where I thought the door to the boy’s locker room was. Now that the lights were dim again for the dance, I was barely able to make out the sign that confirmed it. He pushed on the door, but it didn’t budge. “Shit.”
“We could just go outside if you want.”
“I don’t give up that easily.” As my eyes began to adjust, I watched him pull out his wallet to retrieve a credit card before sliding it between the door and the jamb. He held onto the doorknob while moving the card down at an angle more than once and, after the third try, the door pushed inward. “Pay dirt. Good to know some things haven’t changed in ten years.” Putting the card back in his wallet and shoving it into his back pocket, he pushed on the door with one hand and grabbed mine with his other, leading me into a thick blanket of darkness. “Anybody in here?” That was highly unlikely—but if Tyler knew the trick to unlocking this door, probably half the men from our class did.
Taking my hand again, we entered the room completely. After the door closed, he flipped on a light switch and placed an index finger over his mouth, urging me to keep quiet, while we stood in silence simply listening. “I’m pretty sure the coast is clear—but I think we should turn the lights off again. Otherwise, if people see the light shining under the door—”
Turning, I flipped the switch off, even while debating about cracking a joke that I didn’t need light to talk. But the part of me inside that sometimes felt reserved knew that not having him see my face contort with emotion might make it easier to say everything I’d been holding back till now.
Damn, it was fucking dark in there, but as my eyes grew accustomed to it, I could see a tiny faint light deep inside the locker room, but I really couldn’t make out much of anything even with it. As we moved farther inside, Tyler continuing to lead the way, I saw that the light was coming from inside a windowed office area, but it wasn’t until we passed it that I could see that it was a digital clock and the LED light on a power strip. They weren’t like a lightbulb bathing the space in brightness but at least they served to be a sort of beacon so I didn’t feel like I was completely drowning in a sea of eternal shadows.
