Never Stopped Loving You, page 3
“Magic?” she said, her jaw hanging open in shock. He had never spoken of such things to her. In fact, it had been years since he had allowed himself to think of the magic of love. Maybe it was the fact that Elizabeth was so close again that was bringing such feelings to the surface.
“Love,” he whispered, his heart swelling at the thought.
“Magic? Love? Have you hit your head?” Simone asked, looking genuinely concerned.
“You’ll understand someday.”
“Speaking of love, William’s latest fling is particularly lovely.” She smirked, having no idea of the nerve that she had struck with her words.
“I wasn’t aware that he’s seeing someone new,” Nathan said, though he suspected he knew just who she meant.
“I just passed them walking out of the hospital together. He had his arm around her shoulder. If they aren’t already together, they will be soon. You know no woman can resist Bill’s charms.”
“They aren’t together,” Nathan answered, his voice harsher than Simone had ever heard it before. Just the thought of Elizabeth being with anyone else was enough to make his gut clench with anger. The possibility that that man might be William was too much for Nathan to even comprehend. He had never been jealous when he and Elizabeth were together. The truth was that he had known how deeply in love she was with him and he knew that she would never stray. Now, though, knowing that she had no reason to turn down anyone, the sick feeling of jealousy was practically consuming him.
“Like I said, it’s only a matter of time.” Simone studied him curiously as she spoke.
“No, not with her.”
“You didn’t even see her,” she pointed out, clearly suspicious.
“It doesn’t matter.” He narrowed his eyes, trying to brush off her observation.
“Now that I think about it, she looked a little familiar.”
“Did she?” He wondered how Simone might know Elizabeth. He had never discussed his first love with her for very good reason.
“Yes.”
“Do you know where you’ve seen her before?”
“No, I can’t quite place her. She’s so pretty, though. It’s no wonder that he’s so taken with her.”
“William has never been interested in anything close to a real relationship with anyone.”
“I know but you should’ve seen the way he was looking at her. Maybe I was wrong to call her his latest fling. Maybe our boy is finally planning to settle down.”
“Not with her,” he repeated, doing his best to hide how upset he was.
“Do you know who she is?”
“Yes, she’s an old friend. Now she’s a nurse with Doctors Without Borders. She’s here because her mom’s sick. Once we get her well again, she’ll go back to whatever remote corner of the world they send her to. It’s not like William is the long distance relationship type,” he answered, trying to convince himself as much as he was trying to convince Simone.
“That’s why she looked so familiar. I’ve seen her in that old picture you keep at the house. Maybe Bill will go with her.” Simone’s expression turned thoughtful as she recalled the faded picture of William, Nathan, Elizabeth and a few other staff members at the hospital when they had all first started to work there.
“William, in some third world country? I very much doubt that,” Nathan scoffed.
“Love makes people do crazy things. You should know that.”
“Why me? What do you mean?” Nathan suddenly felt defensive as if he feared that his interest in Elizabeth could be read all over his face.
“You are the one who craves love and magic, aren’t you?”
“Oh, right.” He sighed, wondering why on earth he hadn’t followed Elizabeth all those years ago. Life would have been so different.
“Love does make people do crazy things.”
“That’s why what we have is so much better. We care for each other and we respect each other. We can support each other’s ambitions and build a good life together.”
“I do care about you and I do respect you. You know that. But that’s not enough. We both deserve the chance to find real love. If we get married, we’ll lose that chance.” In truth, he cared enough about Simone to want her to find the same love he was searching for.
“You just have cold feet. I’ll give you a little more time,” she said, undeterred.
“It won’t matter.”
“You’re a smart man. You’ll do the right thing,” Simone said confidently as she turned to leave his office.
Chapter 5
A few days later, Elizabeth sat in the hospital cafeteria waiting for William. He was so busy with his patient load that the easiest way for them to catch up was to meet there. Besides, she wasn’t willing to go far from Diane’s room, no matter how much her mother and sister encouraged her to go to the house and get some rest.
“Bill,” she cried as she saw him approaching.
“Sweet Lizzie,” he said with a laugh as he pulled her into a hug.
“Thank you for taking time out of your busy day for an old friend.”
“I’m never too busy for you. You’re the one who’s been globetrotting for years. It’s your fault that it’s been so long since we were in the same room,” he pointed out as he took the chair across from her.
“I do my best to stay in touch, though,” she answered, her confidence wavering. Although she cared about her friendship with William and kept in touch with him, she couldn’t ignore the fact that he was the last friend that she still had in common with Nathan. She had never been indifferent to the thought that William could see the man who had broken her heart every single day. She loved her friend and didn’t want to cut ties with him. But whenever she talked to him, it felt like she kept alive the bond to her past even though they almost never mentioned Nathan.
“And for that I’m very grateful,” he said, sensing her tension and trying to ease her mind. After all, he was a very busy man as well. They were both living fast-paced lives. William had often worried that she would decide he brought her too many sad memories and he was just glad she had not shut him out of her life as she had with Nathan.
“Have I been a bad friend?” she asked, her eyes so sad that they struck his heart.
“Never. You couldn’t possibly be a bad friend. You have too big a heart for that.” He took her hand in his, squeezing it warmly.
“Thank you, Bill,” she said, placing her free hand on top of his as she smiled up at him with tears in her eyes. Given all that had happened since her return home, she was a bit emotionally raw.
“Now I want to hear all about the adventures that have kept you away from us.”
“I’m sure the work I’ve done is not much different than the work your nurses do here.”
“I don’t think any of our nurses have been stabbed by drug seeking robbers.” He still remembered how he felt when Kate had called to give him the news. The fear he had felt in those moments was something he rarely experienced. It was also the closest he had come to telling Nathan something about her. In the end, he had decided against it, though. After all, he didn’t want to lose his friendship with her because she lost faith in him to keep her confidences.
“It was just one time. Mostly I assist in procedures, administer vaccinations and help deliver babies. It’s all very normal.”
“Okay, humor me. What’s the strangest situation you’ve had to deliver a baby in?” He hoped her story would distract him from the memory of her hostage situation.
“Well, once a monsoon kept our Jeep from getting to the clinic where the doctor would usually have delivered the baby. With the road washed out, the mother and I had to take shelter in a barn to get out of the storm. The baby didn’t want to wait for better weather, so I delivered him there. He was the cutest baby I had ever seen,” she answered with a wink.
“You are amazing.”
“Just a nurse doing her job. You know that.” As she spoke, a blush spread across her cheeks and up her neck.
William had forgotten how easily she was embarrassed by compliments. “You’ve always been exceptional.”
“You’re my friend. You’re biased.”
“Not at all. You always were too good for Nathan,” he teased, much as he had when they were all in college. It was his favorite thing to needle Nathan about, reminding him that Elizabeth was an angel who was far out of his league.
“You don’t know what you’re talking about,” she said, her blush darkening from pink to scarlet. A shiver washed over her as she heard Nathan’s name.
“How are things with you guys, by the way?” It wasn’t that William really wanted to know the ins and outs of their relationship. He knew they hadn’t talked in ages. He just needed her to know that he was there for her if she needed to talk.
“There’s nothing to talk about. I just saw him the other day in mom’s room. You were there.” She averted her gaze.
“I was.” He smirked as he waited for her to expand on that.
“What are you implying with that tone?” she asked, her eyes snapping up to glare at him.
“Tone?” He raised an eyebrow, feigning innocence.
“Don’t play coy with me, Bill,” she warned, utterly adorable in her anger.
“Come on, you have to be feeling some major emotions. You haven’t seen him since he left you.”
His words caused her chest to burn with a pain she had spent years running from. Discussing it with her sister was one thing, sharing it with William was entirely different.
“That was a lifetime ago.” She forced herself to breathe evenly and keep her emotions in check.
“I know having you around has him tied up in knots,” William revealed as he watched her to see how the words would affect her.
“Bill, I really don’t want to talk about Nathan.”
“Holding it all in is going to drive you both mad.”
William was very worried about both of his friends. When Elizabeth came home to visit once a year, she stayed away from the hospital. He quickly realized that she didn’t feel comfortable talking about her heartbreak and he respected her decision for years. Her avoidance of the subject had never allowed him to figure out what her silence really meant although he suspected that her heart still belonged to Nathan.
He knew that there was no one new in her life and, after his best friend started dating Simone, he was sure that helping Elizabeth to keep him out of her mind was the best way to go. When six months ago he told her that Nathan was single again, she quickly changed the subject. While half the globe separated them, it was fine for them to pretend the other didn’t exist. But now that they were forced to see each other every day, holding it all in was utterly unhealthy for both of them.
“He’s got a new life, one I am not a part of. I have a life that he isn’t in either. We both have happy lives, though,” she said, sounding as if she were trying to convince herself rather than him.
“Just because you aren’t miserable doesn’t mean you’re happy.”
“I am happy!” she countered, a little too quickly to be believable.
“Maybe you are. But he isn’t.” William seemed unwilling to let it go.
“I told you we aren’t going to talk about this. Besides, he must be happy. He has everything he wanted. He even almost got married.”
“He did almost get married. Did he tell you why he called it off?”
“With me or her?” she snorted sarcastically.
“Was that a joke?”
“What? I’m funny?” she said with feigned indignation.
“You are. You always were.”
“Thanks.” She forced a big smile in hopes that he was finally changing the subject.
“He left her because he didn’t love her. He looked at what a future without love would be like and he ran away from her as fast as he could.”
“I don’t think this is a conversation to be had over stale hospital coffee,” she said, gesturing to the untouched cups in front of each of them.
“It would be better with a glass of wine,” he admitted, chuckling.
“My personal preference is to talk about love over a carton of ice cream,” she added with a giggle.
“So you still associate talking about Nathan with talking about love?” William was quick to respond to her quip.
“That’s not what I meant.” She felt her cheeks blush. “You said…”
“You don’t have to explain. You’re right. He wants love.” His expression suddenly turned serious.
“He had that once. He ran away from that too,” she pointed out, tears welling in her eyes as she faced the old aching pain once again.
“Nathan was young and stupid then. Only an idiot would leave you,” William said, sliding his chair around the table and sitting it beside her so that he could wrap his arm around her as he spoke.
“You’re a good friend, Bill.”
“I’ve missed you. Nathan has missed you too.”
“I doubt he thinks about me much at all if he can help it.”
“That’s how I know he misses you.”
“You aren’t making any sense,” she said, her head resting on his shoulder as she took comfort from an old friend.
“He won’t talk about you, not to me or anyone else,” he explained.
“That’s not missing someone.” She shook her head, rubbing the back of her hand across her eyes.
“Do you know anyone more in control of his emotions than Nathan?”
“No. He’s been that way since high school.” She remembered those sweet times with a tinge of sadness.
“The only time he loses control of them is when someone brings up your name.”
“That’s not true,” she replied, unable to believe it.
“Yes, it is.” His tone left little room for doubt.
“We shouldn’t be talking about this.”
“I think you’ve missed him too.” He hugged her close as tears began to fall down her cheeks.
“Of course. I think I always will. After all, I planned to spend the rest of my life with him once upon a time.” She hated herself for saying the words aloud.
“Liz, you need to talk to him before one of you does something that can’t be undone.”
“He already did that, years ago when he called off our wedding.”
“But you love him.”
“No, I miss him but I couldn’t love him today.”
“Why?” William asked as he stroked her hair.
“Because I could never trust him again.”
“He’s a good man, you know.”
“That’s why it hurts so much,” she said, tears fading as she forced herself to be strong for herself and for her mother. She had too much to face to allow herself to fall apart because her first love had rejected her.
“Hurts?” William knew that she had slipped when she used the present tense.
“Hurt, past tense,” she said forcefully. “Can we talk about something else? Anything else, please? I’m so worried about my mom now that I feel particularly vulnerable.”
“Sure thing. I’m so sorry, sweetie.”
“It’s an old wound. Being back here in the hospital just brings up memories that are better buried.”
“I’m glad you’re here. I’m just sorry it isn’t for a happier reason. But it’s going to be okay. Your mom’s going to be fine. Nathan may be rotten at relationships but he’s the best doctor your mom could have.”
“I’ve really missed you. There’s nothing like a hug from an old friend.”
“Kind of hard to make new old friends when you never stop traveling.” He smirked at her.
“Very true.” She laughed, feeling the tension slipping out of their conversation.
“I’m here for you and Baby Bird. Just let me know what you need.”
“Thanks. I know I can count on you.”
“Of course you can,” he told her as he gently kissed the top of her head and hoped that forcing her to talk about Nathan was helping her more than it was hurting her.
Chapter 6
Nathan paced back and forth in his office. He had been on edge since the day before, when he had seen William with his arms wrapped around Elizabeth in the middle of the hospital cafeteria. Even from across the room, he could see that she was crying. It had taken everything in him not to rush to her and try to comfort her. But he knew, much to his regret, that his presence was not a comforting one to her anymore. Instead, he’d had to watch from afar as William hugged her and she took comfort from him.
There had been nothing inappropriate about it, but just the thought of them together had kept him from sleeping. He hadn’t been able to think of anything but Elizabeth and the pain he had seen in her eyes. The fact that he knew she was going to arrive in his office at any moment was not helping him to calm himself. He was no closer to getting his emotions in check when he heard a gentle knock at his door.
“The nurse said you wanted to see me,” Elizabeth said as she walked hesitantly into his office. He wondered why she was acting so guarded until he realized that this was the first time they had been alone together since the day that he had ended their engagement.
“Yes, take a seat.” He gestured to the chair across from him as he positioned himself in his own chair.
“Is something wrong with mom?” she asked without moving a step closer to him.
“Actually, she’s doing very well.” At those words, she seemed to relax and allowed herself to take a seat.
“Really?”
“Her counts are all where they should be and her strength is increasing daily.”
“I’ve noticed her getting stronger,” she said, more to herself than to him. The relief on her face was clear, but she was still holding back from him.
“I think she’s ready to go home with you.” Though they had hoped to send her home as soon as Elizabeth had arrived, the test results had been too low to allow for that in those first days.
“She’ll be so relieved.”
“I think being there with you and Baby Bird will help her heal.”
“I agree.”
