Horns and Halos, page 20
“You’ll take away their only protection. This is your fault. Your fault!” Penelope shrieked.
From within the home, I heard momma scream, and I saw daddy’s hand slap against the glass of the window. His fist began to pound on the surface, trying to break free. The door bowed as my family slammed their weight against it to try and get out. Gerald and Alan kept it shut while laughing and mocking my family’s panic-stricken voices.
“Let them out,” I begged.
The smoke and bright, glowing embers from the fire rose and mingled until they blacked out the little remaining light that spilled out from behind the nearby mountains. Starlight was hidden with billowing ebony clouds, and my heart felt like it was stuck inside the clenched fist of a possessive demon.
Someone tapped my shoulder. Fear gripped me. I noticed that I was holding the machete in my hand. I wasn’t sure when it had appeared, and I didn’t care. It was a way for me to protect myself. I turned and thrust the blade into whatever was behind me and growled, but my eyes instantly widened. I gasped as I realized who I had sunk the blade into. Elijah looked down to the metal sticking out of the middle of his chest as blood poured out of his mouth.
Torpidly, his eyes drifted back up to lock with my own. “Why, Sia?” he whined in a voice strained with unfathomable agony and then slumped into the sand.
I screamed and didn’t know what to do with my hands. I didn’t know where to touch him. I was too afraid to touch him. “No. No. No. I’m sorry. Please,” I hiccupped and sniffled. “Please don’t die, Elijah. Stay with me. I didn’t mean to. I didn’t mean any of this. Please!” Nothing that I said was working. He was still bleeding and I was still to blame. “I’m sorry! Please!” I wailed.
From across the way—not far from the chaos—stood Draki, the perfectly white blizzard amidst the unforgiving desert. His robes billowed and hair gently flowed around him. A faint smile formed on his face as he fixed his gaze upon me. Slowly, he opened his arms saying, “I can stop all of this. I can take away the pain, and I can stop the torment. Just come to me. Choose me, Sia, and I’ll save them.”
I didn’t care if it was a lie. I believed it and ran to him weeping. “Save them, Draki. Please. Please. I’ll do anything.”
His arms fell around me and then his fingers bit into my skin. I whimpered and looked up to his molten golden gaze as he breathed, “Anything?” And his face dipped down to mine. His mouth pressed against my lips and every fear was burned away.
A blazing kiss consumed my lips, and I didn’t fight it. I didn’t even try to stop him. Instead, I kissed him back like it would save all of their lives.
I woke up screaming at the top of my lungs, and I could feel every article of clothing clinging to my sweaty body. With one look around me, I noticed that the fire was still burning, and it was just before dawn. Elijah jolted out of his bed and hurriedly crawled over to me.
“Did you have a bad dream?” he asked, his voice thick with sleep.
I took in a breath, and my mouth felt unbearably dry. Nodding to answer him, I looked around me for my canteen.
“Yours is empty,” he informed and rushed to gather his and brought it to me. “Here.”
Graciously, I took it and chugged. Pulling it away from my mouth, I panted. “I had a nightmare,” I whispered.
“Want to talk about it?” Elijah asked.
I looked at him confused. “My nightmare?” Why would anyone want to talk about the horrors our minds cooked up while we slept? You went through it once, why relive it?
“Yeah. My mom used to do it with me when I was younger,” he said with a smile. “After hearing what scared me, she’d tell me that it was over and that I held all the power. After that, she and I would sit in my room for a few minutes to turn my nightmare into a dream by going through each part of it and changing how it happened.”
“You made your nightmare ... into a dream.”
He nodded. “Yeah. That’s what we did.”
And it clicked in me then. I felt like I had been locked in a cage and tortured and Elijah had just handed me the keys to my freedom. It was an enlightening moment, despite the headache that consumed my mind. As I held my hands over my eyes, I could see Elijah look me over with concern from between the slits of my fingers.
I waved him away saying, “I’m okay. Just a headache.”
“Let me check the bags and see if I packed something that will help reduce your fever.”
I didn’t want to nod. Every movement made my brain hurt, so I sat still and waited for him to go check. A minute or two passed before he returned and dropped a pill in my hand saying, “Take this.”
Without a second thought, I did. Then I laid back down. “We’ll need to leave soon.”
He laughed at me. “Not with you in this state. We’ll have to wait until tomorrow. Besides, I need to refill our water before we go anywhere. You went through a lot of it last night.”
“What? We have to keep moving toward the faith city!” I declared.
“Whoa, there. The faith city isn’t going anywhere, Sia. You need to rest and heal up. If we try to drag you along while you aren’t in good health, we could just make matters worse. Then we won’t be in a better situation and might have to wait longer before we can continue.”
I groaned and looked away from him. “I’ll be fine,” I lied.
“That’s you being stubborn.”
I sighed. “So?” I expressed with a pout.
“Just let me take care of you. As soon as your fever breaks we’ll be on the move again, okay? But, please, trust me on this.”
Slowly, I turned back to him and felt my heart break at the vision of his pleading eyes. That look reminded me too much of my nightmare. It reminded me that I was dangerous to anyone that would ever try to get close to me.
Why, Sia?
“You win,” I stated in a hushed tone. “We’ll wait.”
He dipped down and kissed my forehead, and my heart flipped. I was too weak to fight him off, and the feeling of his lips pressed against my skin was welcomed. Everything inside screamed for me to kill the emotions that were surging through me, but—for just this once—I let them travel through me without hindrance. Soon after, I closed my eyes and drifted back to sleep.
Chapter 22:
On the Road Again
For the next day, Elijah watched over me and made sure that my fever was broken whenever it rose. Our water was replenished, and the last of the cornbread was eaten with a side of sliced apples. Though I was angry that we were not making progress on our journey, I was thankful for a day of resting. No chores, no labor, no responsibilities, and no running for my life. I just lounged about as Elijah cut apples and fed me slices despite my protesting and constant giggles. I couldn’t blame him for continuing to do it. It’s kind of hard to believe a girl laughing and snatching food from your grasp while trying to bite your fingers playfully was actually upset with you. For all the negatives, a day spent with a fever and lying around by the fireside wasn’t so bad.
Shortly after lunch, we agreed that it would be safe to head out the next morning. Draki hadn’t made an appearance. I honestly hadn’t expected him to and was thankful for it. By the time the sun had set, I knew that the devil had his twisted reasons for letting me suffer through the fever and not traveling for a day.
The night passed by quickly. By the light of the following day, we packed up, doused the fire, and headed out once more. We made sure to keep a steady pace that wouldn’t push my weary body too hard.
A few hours before nightfall, we found our next campsite. Quickly, I dropped everything I was carrying and sank down to rest. I might have been ready to be on the move again, but my body wasn’t happy about it.
“You didn’t push yourself too hard did you?” Elijah asked as he set down his things.
“Not like I could if I wanted to. Between you dragging your feet and my weak body, we never moved above a snail’s pace.”
He chuckled at me. “Since you’re still not at a hundred percent, I’ll gather firewood for tonight.”
I listened to him as my eyes scaled a small mountain. “That incline isn’t so bad, and even though it’s small, it could give me a pretty good survey of the land.”
He looked over to it and nodded. “Yeah, you’re right. You sure you don’t want me to do it?”
I shook my head. “No. I’m hoping that I can sweat out any of the remaining illness in me by climbing it. I’d like to see more than rocks and sand anyway.”
“All right, but be careful,” he warned. “Last thing we need is you getting a broken leg because you don’t know how to take it easy.”
I rolled my eyes with a smile. He knew me too well after such a small amount of time. I didn’t know if I should be thankful or if I was cursed. “Yeah, yeah. I’m just hoping to spot a lizard to cook up. I think I’m turning into an apple,” I muttered.
“I’ll keep an eye out too,” he stated, waving around a long stick he had sharpened before heading off to gather wood.
He stayed close by while I climbed the mountain. Though, it was more of a steep, enormous hill than anything. Once I reached the top, I stood in awe of the beauty stretched out before me.
The river ran up and split far ahead. The mountains were hugging the stream of water as it cut through the land. I could see scarce wooded areas, endless cacti rolling over the rocky terrain, and sandy dunes further beyond our camp. But the real beauty was the silver city that sprung up miles away like a glistening spire sprouting out from the dusty land. It was a beautiful beacon of hope, and there were no words to describe the emotions that swelled within me when I gazed upon that city. I had never seen a faith city. However, I didn’t need to. Just one look at it from afar and I knew—without any doubt—that it was Saint Augustine.
There was no controlling my tears or the excitement as I bellowed out, “I see it!” Gleefully, I turned around with a grin splitting my face in two, and laughed without restraint as I half-slid my way down shouting, “I see it! I see it!” over and over again.
Elijah rushed to the bottom of the incline after hearing all the commotion. “What’s going on?”
I practically jumped into his arms, and he quickly dropped the firewood so he could catch me. I laughed loudly and hugged him around his neck. “Saint Augustine, the faith city, I can see it! We are only a day away ... maybe two,” I admitted joyfully.
His embrace tightened around me, and he quickly spun us around. Elijah’s laughter spilled out from his mouth like the deep ringing of a bell. I could tell that this made him happy too. A place not ruled by devils. A place free from demons. A place within this vast, empty world that we could call home.
We could call it home.
No more wandering around the Wastes dodging grunts and vicious demons of every rank. No more devils and pacts, just a place where we could settle down and live out the rest of our days. As Elijah whirled around with me in his arms and those thoughts hit me, another (far crueler) thought slithered into my mind. I remembered the nightmare and Elijah being stabbed by me. I remembered the sadness in his eyes as he asked me, “Why, Sia?” All my happiness came to a screeching halt. Gently, I patted his shoulder and awkwardly cleared my throat.
“Sorry about that. I got carried away,” he said with a nervous cough. Looking down, he realized the pile of wood he had dropped and gasped as he turned to look at the sky. Groaning, he shook his head. “I need to get back to gathering more firewood. You won’t be mad if I leave this for you to gather together, will you?”
Laughing lightly, I shoved at his arm and pointed with my chin to an area that was most likely going to have more lumber than what was around us. “Go. I don’t mind.”
He gave a quick smirk and kissed my cheek before darting off to finish his task. I held my cheek and felt a sickness take over me. One that was caused by knowing that I felt pure happiness when he did little things like that, and all I could offer him was pain.
I spent the next few minutes hating myself as I gathered the sticks, took them to camp, and started setting up our space for the night. No matter how hard I tried to tell myself that everything was going to be all right, I didn’t manage to convince myself. In fact, it felt like a nightmare. And that is why I used the little time that I had left before Elijah came back to turn it all around. It could be a dream. I could erase every horrid thought, action, and feeling and turn it all into something new, right?
I had to. If I wanted there to be anything good left in this world, I needed to change how I viewed things. Or I could only blame myself for the outcome in the end.
The dying breath of the sun was extinguished behind the face of the mountains just as we had given life to our fire which would keep us warm throughout the night. Luckily for us, while Elijah was gathering the last of the wood, he had come across a black-tailed jackrabbit and cornered it. Needless to say, he used his sharpened stick and a rock to finish the job, leaving us with a meal that would give us the energy we’d need for the days ahead.
Oddly enough, pairing the cooked meat with a couple of raw apples brought out the flavors of both, and made eating the fruit a little more bearable. We both longed for something more, though.
“I wish we would have come across some wild berries or vegetables. Eating nothing but apples and cornbread for days on end is doing nothing for my energy levels,” I admitted. It felt like it was a contributing factor to my recovery time taking so long too, which only left a sour taste in my mouth.
Elijah was stoking the fire with the stick as he replied, “Yeah. I’ve noticed that it’s been harder for us to wake up lately too. Our bodies are trying to make up for the lack of a decent diet.”
Tired, I massaged my face and agreed. “Yeah.”
“How long do you think it will take, again?”
“Hmmm?”
“You know, until we get to the faith city. How long do you think it’s going to take to get there?”
I took a moment to think about it. Remembering the distance, I sighed as I came to accept the reality that I had denied when I saw the glistening city. “Probably going to need to split it up into two days,” I admitted.
“Oh,” he replied with a crestfallen expression.
I sympathized with him. I didn’t want to spend any more time out here than he did. Especially because I knew that he was in far more danger than I would ever be. Knowing that little tidbit of information made me want to lift his spirits. “It won’t be that bad. Just one more night sleeping under the stars. After that, we’ll be at the front gates of Saint Augustine.”
“I wonder what it will be like,” he stated with a far-off look in his eyes.
Lying down, I stared up at the glittering night sky as I pondered what it would be like. A slow smile crept over my lips. “It’ll feel like we are free. No fear of being attacked. No worries on how we’d survive. It will just feel like we are at ease.”
He mirrored me as he settled in for the night. “I like the way that sounds.”
When I looked over at him, the scar on his arm snatched my smile away and reminded me that the life I lived in my village was happy compared to his. He was raised in a world where every daily task was soaked in worry. In his world, if you did too much you would parish, and if you did too little the place you called home would fall apart, the farms would wither, and the people would starve. He lived in constant worry of whether or not his actions were too much or too little, and his body and mind bore the marks either way it went. A fresh wave of guilt hit me just as he turned to look at me with a warm curve of his lips.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered to him.
Looking confused, he asked, “For what?”
I looked away as I replied. “For life not being fair ... for any of us.”
He gave a short, soft burst of laughter. “It hasn’t been, but in two more days, we won’t have to say sorry to each other ever again. Not unless we do something wrong.”
The words hurt. They hurt so much because I couldn’t promise him that I wouldn’t wind up doing just that. “Yeah,” I said in a hardly audible tone. I was glad that it sounded like I was tired. I was happy that he didn’t say anything else because I was battling myself and none of it was pretty. As my emotions threatened to rip the ability to speak from me, I said, “Goodnight,” before my words would sound too rattled. Closing my eyes, I hoped that we could sleep peacefully through the night.
A sound nearby had jerked me awake. It wasn’t morning yet. I lay completely still for a moment, afraid that my movement would bring attention to myself. My eyes walked the space between where I rested and where Elijah had made his own bed. He was staring back at me, and my heart skipped a beat as I hadn’t expected his eyes to be open and looking right at me. As the panic ebbed from my limbs, he raised a finger in front of his lips and pointed to behind me.
Even though I was riding the fear that was gripping me, I had to wonder where that worthless devil of mine was now. He always seemed to be gone when I needed him. He always saved me, but how many of his actions were for me, and how many were an elaborate scheme that fed his own personal enjoyment?
The thoughts were broken as the sound of a snapping twig snatched my attention away, and I turned swiftly to face the direction the noise had come from. Straining my eyes, I tried to search the murky shadows blanketing the land around us. As my vision adjusted to the lack of light, I could see a huddled form hopping around a few yards away. It took a pause and lifted its face into the air as it sniffed, and I could see its eyes glow in the moonlight.
It was a grunt.
From what I could tell, it was alone and probably attracted to the fire. But when I had that thought, I remembered roasting the rabbit earlier and my face twisted with disappointment at my own stupidity. The remains of our dinner hadn’t been disposed of properly. It wasn’t attracted to our fire. It was attracted to the scent of fresh blood and meat!
Quickly and quietly, I turned to face Elijah again. I gave a pointed look to the leftovers from our dinner, and he followed the line of my gaze. As soon as he saw it, his face contorted in frustration. Balling up his fist, he went to slam it on the ground in a fit of rage and stopped inches from the dirt. Silently, he opened his hand and gently placed the palm on the ground to help steady his weight as he attempted to crawl over to it. Once there, he pointed to the carcass and then motioned that he would toss it over behind the grunt. I nodded. We didn’t need the creature passing by us, and (hopefully) when its stomach was full, the grunt would wander away from our camp. Even though the strategy seemed sound, my hand still instinctively wrapped around my machete as I tried to think of a backup plan ... just in case.
