Every Love, page 12
“Yesssssss, just like that,” I scream as Nate slams into me. His hands digging into my flesh, my ass in the air, and his cock riding me so hard I can’t think straight. My mind swirls with desire and pain. He hits that spot, the one where it hurts and feels good all at the same time.
Each thrust from him is matched with a grunt. I love his noises and how in the zone he is. When he gets this way, he’s close…again. But so am I, even though I don’t want to let go, I’ll have to. Letting go means that reality will creep back in, and as much as I have been pretending what Alex did isn’t bothering me, it is, and I don’t want to go there now.
So I’d rather remain in this symphony that is Nate and I, our bodies so close, like they were meant for each other. His hard cock, rubbing my insides with every ridge, pleasing me so good.
I keep fighting the urge of letting go. It’s selfish, but Christ, he feels so good. Suddenly, his noises change to loud grunts – he’s coming. My body ignites, letting go right with him, with no warning. Right now, there’s no stopping the progression. I convulse, marveling in everything that is this man and everything that he gives me.
He slows his movements, gently stroking me, giving me every last drop of his cum. I move just a little as our bodies fall against the bed. We roll to our sides and I sigh heavily.
“Are you okay?” he asks.
I look in his eyes and find strength. Nodding my head to tell him that I am… although…I’m not sure if I really am okay.
“Have you thought anymore about what I offered?” Nate asks.
I chuckle a little. “I appreciate you trying to help, I really do. But if you tried to talk to Alex, it wouldn’t do a damn thing.”
“Then why don’t you talk to him?” I cringe at the thought. It’s bad enough seeing him and Jaquelle together, much less having to talk to him.
“You saw how upset he makes me. I’d rather take my chances and hope he leaves me alone. Thankfully, most of what I do, I can do from home.”
“Come on, El, listen to yourself. Do you really want that? You have to do something. Don’t let this prick have this control over you. Avoiding it and hoping he will go away isn’t going to solve anything.”
I toss my head back in frustration. What can I really do? “Let me think about it. Right now I gotta eat; I’m starving.”
He kisses me and says, “Good. Me too. Do you wanna go grab something?”
“If you want to.”
“I just want to make you smile,” he says sitting up in bed.
“You do. I’m sorry if this has my head twisted. You make me so happy. Being with you right now is the only thing that’s keeping me sane.”
He laughs at my comment. “Now, that’s a first. Wait ’til I tell my psychologist that.”
“You have a psychologist?” I blurt out, immediately feeling like an asshole for sounding so pompous.
“I do. It’s required by the military that I see him.”
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to say it that way.”
“It’s okay,” he says getting dressed.
“Do you see him often?” I ask.
He nods his head pulling his shirt over it. “He’s helped me through a lot of shit, especially with my PTSD and all that.”
I follow suit, not really sure how to respond to him. “I’ve never talked to anyone.”
“You should, Roger would be happy to help you. Especially with all this shit that happened with your ex. He’d give you a clear perspective on how to handle things.
“Maybe,” I respond, scared to commit to anything at the moment. “Where should we go eat?” I ask hoping that getting out of the house will help me.
“I think I have the perfect place. Do you have a blanket we could bring?”
“Yeah.” I rip the comforter off of my bed and he laughs.
“That’ll work. Dress warm.”
I put on some sweats and a hoody then turn to him. He’s sitting on the edge of the bed watching me. “You’re so gorgeous, you know that?”
I wrap my arms around his neck and look into his brown eyes. They’re so dark that they sparkle. And when he looks at me, I love the way they dance.
“So are you,” I respond and kiss him.
He kisses me back. The instant our lips touch, all my worries vanish. All that matters is Nate and I.
“Let’s get going,” he says once we stop, with a huge grin on his face. I brush the hair out of my face and grab my comforter. “On second thought, do you have something smaller?” he asks.
Leaving the comforter on my bed, I grab a soft throw from the hall closet. Then we load up in Nate’s car and hit the road. As we drive, I try and decipher where we are going based on each turn he makes. I’m surprised when he pulls into the local supermarket.
“You wanted food, right?”
“Of course, but I have food at my house.”
“Just follow my lead here, I don’t wanna ruin the surprise.”
“Okay.” We get out of the car and head inside. Nate grabs a small handheld basket and I grab his other arm, holding it as we go through the store. Shopping with Nate is fun; I could definitely see us doing it more. Once we check out, we load up and head to our final destination.
“Can I at least have a hint?” I whine.
“I gave you one.”
“Saying we are going to eat this food there doesn’t count. I want to know where we are going.”
“Can’t help there.”
“Please?”
“Be patient,” he says reaching over, running his right hand up my thigh and then finally clenching my pussy. He cups it and holds me, completely content. I sit back, obeying his word. He wants patience, I can give it to him. I watch Nate drive, so in control, the darkness of the night making his skin glow. Every time a car passes us by there is a glimmer in eyes. Looking at Nate makes me lose track of where we are going. “Why are you staring?” he asks rubbing over my sex.
“I’m focusing on patience, like you asked.”
“Good, then stare away.”
He keeps driving, taking turn after turn after turn, and I wonder at this point if he’s just driving in circles. But it doesn’t matter, I’m with Nate and that makes me happy.
Finally he turns down a familiar road. Alongside of us is the Atlantic. I wonder if we are going to have a picnic on the beach. Blanket, food, beach…that has to be it.
“I know where we’re going,” I tell him.
“You do?” he asks, glancing at me.
“The beach?”
He shakes his head. “Nope, not the beach.”
“Really?” I was positive of it.
The road suddenly forks off and Nate goes to the right where there is a desolate little lot. He pulls in and nudges the nose of his car up to the edge of the cliff. Looking out the windshield, the expansive ocean lies before us. It is dark, but the moon shines down casting just the right amount of shadows that show peaks of waves here and there. Jesus, the waves are huge tonight.
“Let’s get out,” he says.
I obey, walking to the front of his car. This view is absolutely breathtaking. Nate sets the blanket and food on the hood, then comes to me. We stand together, his arms around me, chin atop my shoulder, and his sweet breath dancing on my skin.
“It’s high tide,” he says.
“It’s amazing.”
“I’m glad you like it.”
“I do. Do you come here often?”
“I actually haven’t been here before. It’s turtle egg laying season, I read about it online. Apparently there are a ton of turtles that were born on this exact beach and come back every year to lay their eggs. I’m surprised there aren’t more people here.”
“Me too, but I like that it’s just us.”
He kisses my neck then lets go of me. We get everything all spread out on the hood of his car and take a seat. I keep my eyes on the beach looking for any turtles. Nate’s phone rings, I glance at him as he pulls it out of his pocket. Right away he ignores the phone call and then smiles at me.
“Sorry about that.”
“Don’t be.”
“Are you ready to talk about this whole work situation again?”
“Not really,” I respond completely honest. I don’t want to talk about it tonight. Anything that has to do with Alex gives me anxiety.
“I’ve been thinking about something; just hear me out, okay?”
I nod my head, not sure of what he’s going to say, but I trust him.
“Well, you know I want to open a second Mechanical location and I think I found a place.”
I glare at him – how did he find a spot without me?
“Don’t worry, I’m not working with another realtor, I just happened to drive by it. I stopped and looked in the windows. It’s an industrial building off of route seven with a strip mall attached.”
“I’ve heard of it, Nate. That property has been on the market for almost a year.”
“I talked to one of the tenants and that’s why I think I could get it, and at a good price. Then you could have an office in the strip mall and work on your own, and we’ll either rent or sell the other spaces.”
I’m a little shocked by his offer. Plus, hearing him say “we’ll” regarding something so huge just…throws me off. “Wow, Nate, thank you. It all sounds great and is really generous, but I’m just not sure that I’m ready to venture out on my own though.” And committing to something with him this big is a huge step that I’m not sure I’m ready to make.
“Why not?”
“I don’t know.”
“Talk to me, El. You can tell me anything.”
“I don’t want to move in too soon and then start to spend too much time together.”
He rolls his eyes at me. “Come on, that’s the last thing you should be thinking. We’ll be doing our own things while we are at work.”
“I also don’t want to do this and end up being a flop having to walk back in there with my tail between my legs.”
“It’s scary, I get that. Trust me, I knew nothing about running a gym when we started Mechanical, but I learned, and I’ll help you get things started too. Please don’t worry about us though, this is gonna be good for us,” he says, handing me a fresh beer.
“How am I gonna get clients to even come into the door of my office?”
“Well, I’m sure you already have word of mouth on your side from everyone that you’ve helped. Plus, there are so many other ways that we can market you.”
My stomach is in knots. I don’t want to hurt Nate’s feelings, but I don’t know if I’m ready to do this. What Alex did to me was terrible and I never want to endure anything remotely similar to that again. But can I trust Nate? One side of me says I can, but something else is telling me to keep my guard up.
On the other hand, I have always dreamed of having my own agency, and with Nate’s help, I think we can make it happen. I realize, it’s a risk after all. But what’s life if I don’t take risks? Yes, everything that we are and know is so new. But something inside is telling me to follow my heart and to just do it. Nate is not Alex and I have to trust that he won’t hurt me the way that Alex did.
“You promise you’ll help me every step of the way?” I ask with a shaky voice. I have no reason to not trust Nate so I’m going with my gut. I can’t believe that I’m about to agree to this.
“I promise,” he says, wrapping a tight arm around me.
I trust in his word more than I have anyone’s in my entire life. It’s a scary thing to do, but for once, I do. Looking into his eyes, they tell me that he wouldn’t let me down. There’s something comforting about Nate, something so reassuring. I think it’s his past, that we both have known the deep pain of heartbreak, of being thrown over for another by the one we’ve loved, that makes me trust him. And for once in a relationship, it seems that he’s been so open and honest with me, sharing such deep secrets and experiences. So I’m following my heart with this one and from now on, I’m putting my trust in him and moving forward.
It’s loud, but the atmosphere is good. Drinks are flowing through everyone and I love being out with El. Watching her on the dance floor, she’s got the biggest smile on her face, and now that we have a plan to execute together for the future, it helps both of us so much.
Nash is watching Jess like a hawk, and when the girls step away to the restroom, I take the opportunity to talk to him about the second location for the gym. Especially because he’s leaving town for her birthday. “I think I found a spot to open Mechanical 2.”
“Really?” he asks.
“Yeah,” I grab my phone, pulling up the listing pictures and slide it in front of him.
He scrolls through, not really saying much. Then asks, “How much?”
“Just a little under a million. If you like it, I’ll try and get it. There’s potential for additional income with the strip mall. There are still a few open stores in there paying rent now.”
“Nate, I think it would be dope, but I want us to make the right financial move.”
“I promise, we will. Have I let you down at all?”
He shakes his head and raises his beer to me, and I do the same. “To Mechanical 2?” he asks.
“Hell yeah.”
“What are you two celebrating?” Amanda asks as she sits down next to me.
“The possible new home of our expanding empire. Behold: Mechanical number two.” I pass her my phone with the pictures and she looks through them intently.
“Damn, that place is huge,” she says.
“It would be perfect. I’m gonna see if I can make an offer and close the deal quick, with Elania’s help of course.”
“Speaking of, where is she?” Amanda asks.
Just then she comes out of the restroom, both her and Jess are giggling walking arm and arm. Clearly, they’ve made a connection.
I don’t have to answer Amanda. She sees the two girls coming towards us and her eyes are just as fixated on them as are mine. “Hi, Amanda,” El says, giving her a hug.
Jess says hi as well and then drags Nash onto the dance floor. As the three of us begin to talk, my phone rings. It’s sitting in the middle of the table, right where Amanda set it down, face up for the world to see. As it rings, Andrea’s name shines on the screen with a picture of her basically naked. Shit, I forgot to delete her contact. I grab it, trying to hide it, but not quickly enough. Elania’s eyes were glued to the screen.
She’s still staring at the table, right in the spot where my phone had sat and won’t look at me. I decline the call, watching her, waiting for her reaction. What the fuck do I say? She finally looks at me and asks, “Who was that?”
“No one, El. It was no one.”
Tears fill her eyes and I catch Amanda slip away out of the corner of my eye.
“Don’t bullshit me, Nate, I’m not fucking stupid. Who was that? She’s fucking naked.”
“She’s no one, I promise, El.”
She glares at me, tears running down her cheeks when she blinks and I hate that this is happening.
“You’re really going to lie to me?”
“I’m not lying,” I say, reaching for her arm. She pulls away from me with disgust written all over her face. Just the gesture alone is hurtful enough, but the look in her eyes absolutely kills me. “Please, El.”
“Don’t ‘Please, El’ me, I gave you the fucking chance to tell me who she was and you won’t.” Angrily, she grabs her purse off of the chair and leaves.
I react right away, following her outside. No! She can’t drive – she’s been drinking – plus, I can’t let her walk away from me. I need her. Her legs move quickly, and the second we step outside, I grab her, spinning her around and force her to look me in the eye. I have to tell her the truth about who Andrea is. She’s not going to let this go until I do.
“She’s someone I used to sleep with, before you. But that’s it. I never dated her and I haven’t been with her since we’ve been together.
She looks at the ground and then asks, “I thought Arion was the last person you were with?”
I shake my head, disgusted for being dishonest.
“Then why not tell me that in the beginning?”
“I don’t know, I didn’t think…I guess.”
“I guess?” she repeats and laughs, starting to walk away from me.
I step in front of her. My leg gets wobbly as I move, but I don’t care, I have to stop her.
“She means nothing to me, she never has. Please know that.”
“Well, you slept with her, she had to mean something, and why is she calling you anyways?”
“She’s having a hard time letting go, she wants more from me. I told her that I’m not interested and have been ignoring her, but it’s not helping.”
She wipes her tears away with the back of her hand and shakes her head. I grab her body, hugging her tightly against my chest and kiss the top of her hair. She stands there for a few seconds with her arms down and it worries me. Then she clings to me, crying.
I wrap my arms around her back, welcoming the closeness. Welcoming the fact that she’s not running from me. I can’t lose her – period! In the short time that I’ve known her, she means more to me than I ever imagined. She might mean as much to me as Arion did, and that was something I never dreamed would happen.
I’m afraid to move or say anything. I’m really pissed at myself for not handling the Andrea situation better when I was still seeing her. I should have never let things progress with her. I knew it was wrong all along, but I’d been thinking with my dick and not my head. My head just couldn’t handle anything.
And now here I am trying to clean up things with El. We stand frozen, she is tucked so comfortably in my arms that I hope for us to move past this, for her to know that she’s all that matters to me.
“I’m sorry, Andrea,” I tell her, only making the tears run more.
“I don’t understand, I thought we had a connection,” she says between labored breaths.
I hate to be honest with her, but maybe that’s the only way to get through to her. She’s acting like I led her to believe we had a future when all we ever did was fuck. She’s been sitting in my car for almost fifteen minutes and we’ve done nothing but go over the same things.
