“It’s fine. I need to get back to my dorm and unpack though. I have freshman orientation tomorrow morning. I don’t want to miss that. Maybe…maybe I’ll see him there.”

  “Just don’t get your hopes up, okay? I don’t want to see you get hurt again.”

  “I won’t, I promise,” I said.

  He didn’t need to know that my hopes were already up.

  I didn’t see Jesse at orientation or anywhere around campus during the next week. Andy was hell-bent on finding a job as soon as possible, so I walked around campus by myself while he was off job-hunting.

  It was strange to be on my own, but I kind of liked it. After Jesse had left, nothing had changed at school. I had still been the perfect princess who everyone crowded around, so being alone now was refreshing.

  I spent the entire week exploring campus to find my classes, and I also checked out downtown Morgantown. One thing was for sure—this was definitely a party town. Bars were everywhere. It was too bad that I didn’t have a fake I.D. to get into any of them.

  West Virginia was very different from California. Back home, you didn’t talk to strangers. You went about your business and avoided eye contact with anyone you didn’t know. Here, it was the complete opposite. People would start a conversation with you while you were in line at Starbucks or while you were waiting for the light to change to cross the street. It was cool to hear the Southern accents coming from everyone’s mouths. Most of their accents weren’t strong, but a few had a serious twang.

  It was a complete culture shock, and I loved it. I’d been here for less than a week, and I already felt at home.

  I’d made a few friends at the dorm, too. While we weren’t painting each other’s nails and talking boys, it was nice to have a conversation with another human being besides Andy. The girls across the hall from me weren’t very friendly, but everyone else seemed to be. They all asked where I’d moved from and were shocked when I told them. They couldn’t imagine wanting to move to West Virginia from California. I didn’t agree though. There was just something about the down-to-earth nature of these people that made me feel ten times more welcome than I’d ever felt at home.

  I was nervous as I got ready for my first official day of classes. I straightened my hair until my natural waves were completely gone. After making sure that my makeup was perfect, I grabbed my bag and headed for the door.

  I texted Andy to let him know I’d meet him for lunch after I finished my second class. We’d stumbled upon a cute little family-owned restaurant one evening, and we had decided to meet there for lunch today.

  Nervous butterflies made my stomach churn as I walked to my first class. I hated the fact that I didn’t have Andy with me, but he wasn’t enrolled as a student. I had to suck it up and do this on my own. I was a big girl. I could do this.

  My mouth fell open when I walked into my first class. It was huge, seating probably close to two-hundred students. It wasn’t even a classroom. It was a small auditorium. I should have expected as much since it was English 101, and all freshmen were required to take an English class.

  All of the seats in the back rows were already filled. I slowly made my way down the steps, my eyes searching for an empty spot. Almost halfway down, I found one on the end. I darted down the steps and fell down into it, relieved that I wouldn’t be stuck up front. Even after all this time, I still hated to sit in the front row.

  “Hi, I’m Abby,” the girl beside me said.

  I turned to look at her and smiled. “I’m Emma. It’s nice to meet you.”

  “Likewise,” she said as she returned my smile.

  Even sitting down, I could tell that Abby was a tiny girl. She was stick thin but not in a way that looked unhealthy. Her skin was porcelain white and went perfectly with her bright red hair and the freckles across her nose.

  “So, where are you from?” she asked.

  “California. And you?”

  “Tennessee.”

  “Your accent is one of the strongest I’ve heard so far.”

  She laughed. “Yeah, I’ve noticed that, too. You have a bit of an accent, too…or maybe it’s a lack of an accent. It’s strange hearing all of these different dialects after growing up in Tennessee and then coming here.”

  “I’m still trying to adjust to the dialect here, too. I’m the odd one out.”

  “Not at all. I’ve heard a few different accents around here. You’ll fit right in, except you’re a bit more tan than most of the people I’ve seen.”

  “My friend Andy and I pretty much lived on the beach all summer. We both like to surf.”

  “That’s so cool. I’ve only been to the ocean one time, but I loved it. I hope I can go back sometime.”

  This girl was so sweet. Between her personality and her tiny appearance, I wanted to pick her up and hug her.

  Preparing for class, I pulled my book and a notebook from my bag. Once I had everything out, I turned in my seat and searched the sea of faces behind me. After a week with no sign of Jesse, I didn’t expect to see him, so I wasn’t disappointed when I didn’t. I sighed in defeat as I turned back to face the front, and I slouched down into my seat.

  I knew I shouldn’t, but I couldn’t help but feel disappointment each time I looked for him and found nothing. From the beginning, I knew that there was a good chance he wouldn’t be here. West Virginia was a small state, but he could be at any college.

  The professor walked in and greeted us. The room was so large that he had to speak into a microphone clipped to his suit jacket. One thing was for sure—if I were looking for a one-on-one education, I definitely wasn’t going to find it in this class.

  After introducing himself as Professor Vernon, he handed out a stack of papers to each person on the bottom row and had them pass the papers back to the rest of us. Once I got it, I saw it was our class syllabus. I flipped through it quickly, skimming over the rules and going straight to the assignments we would have for the rest of the semester.

  I wanted to groan out loud when I saw that almost our entire grade would be based on three twenty-page papers and our final. I didn’t mind writing, but twenty pages seemed a bit extreme. What happened to those damn worksheets we did in high school that made us circle the noun? I liked those.

  We spent the next ninety minutes going over the syllabus from front to back. It was obvious that I was going to hate this class. Once we were dismissed, I packed my papers and book into my backpack, and then I followed everyone up the stairs and back outside. I didn’t realize that Abby was still beside me until she spoke up.

  “What’s your next class?”

  “History with Professor Cale.”

  “Me, too. Is it okay if I walk with you?” she asked.

  “Nope,” I joked.

  “Oh…okay. I’ll see you later,” Abby said quietly as she hurried ahead of me.

  “Abby! Abby, wait! I was kidding!” I yelled as I raced to catch up with her.

  She looked surprised. “I’m sorry. I thought you were serious.”

  I laughed. “No, I was just messing with you.”

  I found it strange that she would flee like that, but I didn’t ask questions. Something told me that she’d been picked on before. She was timid, like most kids who had been bullied.

  We walked the rest of the way to our next class in silence. I was afraid to say anything else to her. I didn’t want to hurt her feelings.

  Our history class was smaller but not by much. We found seats a few rows from the back and sat down. I waited until most of the seats were filled before scanning the room for Jesse. Again, he was nowhere to be found. I sighed in defeat, causing Abby to look over at me.

  “You okay?” she asked.

  “Yeah, just looking for my friend. I haven’t seen him in a long time, but I thought he might be at this school.”

  She nodded. “I see. Well, this campus is huge, so he might be here, and you just haven’t crossed paths yet.”

  “I hope that’s what it is,” I said as I pulled out my book.

  The professor entered the room and introduced herself. The class went exactly like the last. I groaned again as I realized I would have to write at least one paper for this class, too. I better learn to type fast, or I’m gonna be screwed.

  Abby invited me to sit with her at lunch, but I declined. She seemed sad until I told her that I had plans with my friend to eat off-campus. After I promised to eat with her on Wednesday, she perked right back up. I waved good-bye, and then I walked back across campus to where my car was parked.

  After fighting the lunch traffic, I finally pulled into the restaurant’s parking lot. I didn’t spot Andy when I walked in, but after searching the room a few times, I finally noticed him in the back corner. Once I spotted him, I was shocked that it had taken me so long to find him. While most of the residents were tan, they had nothing on Andy. With his darkened skin and sun-kissed hair, he stood out from everyone else.

  If things had been different from the beginning, I wouldn’t have thought twice about crushing on him. Instead, all I could see when I looked at him was Jesse. They were so much alike, both in how they acted and how they looked.

  “What are you doing all the way back here?” I asked.

  “There weren’t any other tables when I came in. It’s actually kind of nice to be away from everyone else.” He said through a mouthful of food. How polite, Andy.

  “I guess so.” I sat down and picked up a menu. I still had a few nerves leftover from this morning, so I wasn’t really hungry.

  When the waitress came over, I ordered a grilled cheese and an iced coffee. It wasn’t the most appealing mix, but I didn’t care. Grilled cheese was the only thing that looked even remotely appetizing. The waitress gave me a strange look, but she said nothing as she took my order and left.

  “So, how was school?” Andy asked.

  “It was okay. I’m not looking forward to all the papers I’m going to have to write this semester though, and I’m sure it’ll be worse once I get through my classes tomorrow. I have a laptop, but I need to get a printer, so I don’t have to constantly run to the library to print stuff.”

  “Then, go get one, moneybags.”

  I stuck out my tongue. “You’re hilarious. When do you start your new job?”

  “Tomorrow. The guy I talked to seemed pretty nice. He had me draw a few things, and he was pretty impressed. I think I’m going to like it there.”

  “I’m glad,” I said as the waitress put my food down in front of me.

  I’d learned that Andy was as talented as Jesse when it came to drawing. He just wasn’t interested in tattooing, like Jesse was. Instead, Andy used his skills to design custom surfboards for some of the surf shops back home. Obviously, West Virginia wasn’t a surfing kind of place, but Andy had managed to snag a job at a local skateboard shop. Neither of us had expected him to find anything even close to his old job. When he’d called me to tell me that he’d found this job, we’d both been ecstatic.

  I started nibbling on my grilled cheese as Andy talked about some of the guys he’d met at the shop. It took me a minute to realize that he’d stopped talking. I looked up to see his mouth hanging open in shock.

  “Andy? What’s wrong?” I asked.

  He just shook his head as he continued to stare over my shoulder. I was terrified to look behind me, but I did anyway. My mouth dropped open in shock as well. There was no way she could be here, yet there she was. Ally. She had just walked through the door, and she was making her way to the counter. I sat, frozen, as she walked behind the counter and continued into the back room. It appeared that she was not only here, but she worked here as well.

  “What the hell? What is she doing in West Virginia?” he asked.

  I felt my blood start to boil. I knew exactly why she was here. “I have a pretty good idea,” I spit out.

  His eyes widened as he realized what—or rather, who—I was talking about. “Jesse.”

  “Jesse,” I confirmed.

  “How did she even know where to find him? We searched for months, and nothing came up. There are thousands of people in this town, and we just took a chance and hoped for the best when we came here.”

  “She obviously came here to find him. I’m betting if she has a job here, then she plans to stay for a while. She must have found him.”

  “Fuck!” Andy growled.

  Nausea overtook me as I realized what that could mean. “Andy, you don’t think…”

  “What?”

  “You don’t think she told him what she knows, do you? I never wanted him to know!” Tears were threatening to run down my cheeks, but I refused to let them flow.

  “She wouldn’t.”

  “Are you serious right now? Look at what she’s already done! There’s no way that she didn’t tell him.”

  “Unless…”

  “Unless, what?”

  “Unless she didn’t tell him yet. Maybe she’s saving it for when you show up. I never kept it a secret that you were searching for him. Maybe she wants to use it to hurt you if you ever found him.”

  I paled as I thought about it. He was right. That was something that Ally would do without thinking twice. When it came to her, she always did what she needed to make sure she would come out on top.

  “Oh god, you’re right,” I whispered. “She’s going to destroy me as soon as she knows I’m in town.”

  “Breathe, Emma. It’s going to be okay. I’m going to go and talk to her to see if I can find out where Jesse is.”

  “No!” I shouted, causing a few people at the tables around us to glance our way. “You can’t. As soon as she sees me, she’s going to go running to him.”

  Andy sighed. “What do you think we should do then?”

  “Let’s get out of here. We’ll wait a few hours and then come back. We can see where she goes once she leaves here. She might lead us right to him.”

  “This is nuts. Just let me go talk to her.”

  “Andy, I know she’s your sister, but you can’t. She is a manipulative bitch, and she hates me. Anything you do to help will only make things worse. Let’s try my plan first and see what happens.”

  “Fine, but we need to get out of here before she sees us.”

  “Let’s go,” I said as I threw a few bills on the table.

  I turned to the door while Ally was standing behind the counter. She was in deep conversation with some guy that I assumed was the manager. As long as she kept talking to him, she wouldn’t notice our escape.

  I didn’t breathe until we were out of the restaurant and walking down the sidewalk toward where my car was parked. Andy’s car was parked a few spaces behind mine.

  “Let’s head over to your apartment to wait,” I told him as I unlocked my car.

  He nodded. “I’ll see you in a few.”

  I was a nervous wreck all the way back to Andy’s house. I’d never factored seeing Ally into my plans, especially seeing her and Jesse together at once. There was no doubt in my mind that she’d found him since she had a job here. If she hadn’t, she would have moved on and continued her search. I mean, come on. She hadn’t come all this way to get a job as a waitress.

  How could he even stand to look at her after what she’d put me through? Surely to God, he had to know that she’d played us both. Jesse wasn’t stupid.

  Oh god, what if she’d come all this way to tell him how much she loved him, and he took her in? What if they are together now? My stomach rolled at the thought of her touching him. I didn’t think I could handle seeing the two of them together.

  By the time I made it to Andy’s, I was on the verge of a full-blown panic attack. He had to practically carry me up to his apartment. Once he managed to get me inside, he put me on the couch and sat down beside me.

  “Emma, look at me. You’ve got to breathe,” he whispered as he hugged me.

  I relaxed into him, unable to sit up. Every bad possibility that I could think of was rolling through my head. What if she tells him? I didn’t think I could stand to look at Jesse, knowing he knew just what I’d done.

  “I can’t handle this,” I cried out.

  “Yes, you can. You didn’t come all this way just to give up. So what if Ally is here? It doesn’t change the fact that you still care about him. It’s been two years, Emma, since you walked away from him, and you still can’t let go. That should tell you something. You still love him as much as you did back then. People search their entire lives to find someone they care about as much as you care about Jesse. You can’t just walk away because of Ally.”

  “What if she tells him?” I whispered.

  I felt him tense.

  “There’s nothing we can do if she does. I told you from the beginning that I thought he should know. I never wanted to hide it from him. Lying to him won’t make it go away. It’ll only haunt you until you tell him the truth.”

  “I plan to tell him once we get everything worked out. I’m just afraid that he’ll hate me.” That was mostly true. Honestly, I wasn’t sure if I had ever planned to tell Jesse the truth. I wasn’t sure I could handle his reaction.

  “Then, he’ll hate me, too. What’s done is done, and there’s nothing either of us can do about it. I wish I could change what happened, but I can’t.”

  “We were stupid,” I said.

  “We were.”

  I closed my eyes as the worst mistake of my life played over and over in my head.

  “Emma? Are you okay?” Andy whispered in the darkness as we sat together on his couch.

  I raised my head to look up at him. “No.”

  “Me either,” he said as his other hand came up to cup my face.

  A small amount of light was coming from the kitchen. It was enough to see him leaning down toward me. I only had a second to realize what he was about to do before he did it. I froze as his lips crushed against mine. I gasped in shock, but I didn’t pull away.

  My head was fuzzy as I opened my mouth to allow his tongue to slip inside. I moaned as he pushed me, so I was lying back on the couch with him on top of me. Fuck, this feels good. My head swam from both lust and the alcohol I’d consumed.

 

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