Once Upon a Temptingly Ruinous Kiss: #2 The Whickertons in Love, page 10
Lady Leonora inhaled a shuddering breath of relief. “Perhaps you’re right,” she agreed in a feeble voice. “But how? Ladies are not taught such skills. Who will teach me? You?”
Drake felt the breath rush from his chest. “Not me.” He shook his head vehemently.
“Then who?” Fresh doubt came to her eyes.
Drake cleared his throat. “I was thinking perhaps your father or your brother could teach you.”
Instantly, Lady Leonora’s eyes widened in shock. She stared at him for a long moment, then took a step back, her head shaking from side to side. “They do not know. I cannot tell them. I cannot.”
Drake frowned, something ugly coming to his heart. “Why not?” Only too well did he remember his own father, an unfeeling and uncaring man if ever there had been one. Truth be told, Drake had never once exchanged a word with Lord Whickerton; however, seeing him with his wife and daughters had given Drake the impression of a considerate and devoted husband and father. Had he been mistaken?
Chapter Twelve
To Feel Comfortable
With Lord Pemberton standing once more in the spot he had occupied before, Leonora once again recovered her wits, her thoughts no longer crowded by emotions she could not hold at bay. Indeed, his approach had frightened her, conjuring memories she would rather forget. Still, he had retreated on his own accord—not that she could have forced him to do so—assuring her that he was no threat. It had been a test of loyalty, one he had placed upon himself, one that had not been her doing; nonetheless, she was most grateful for it. Not that she had not felt safe in his presence before. Now, however, it was different.
“Why not?” Lord Pemberton pressed, and she could see a muscle in his jaw tense, then twitch. Clearly, some dark thought had resurfaced, giving his voice that menacing and somewhat threatening tone.
Guessing the direction of his thoughts, Leonora straightened and said, “I do not hesitate to share the truth about what happened at the masquerade with them because I fear their reaction or doubt their love for me.” She held his gaze calmly, waiting for her words to sink in. When his jaw relaxed slightly, she continued, “It is because I know how dearly they love me that I do not dare speak to them about this. I fear that they would do something unwise, something that would endanger their lives.”
Lord Pemberton regarded her thoughtfully. “You’re worried they would call the man out?” He frowned. “How can they when his identity remains unknown?”
Leonora inhaled a deep breath, beginning to feel slightly fatigued at this late hour. Still, she needed to make him understand because the thought that he doubted her family’s loyalty pained her.
Holding his gaze, Leonora took a careful step toward him. She could see in the slight widening of his eyes that he understood what she was doing, his attention focused on her in a deeply profound way. “Does the thought truly surprise you, my lord?” Leonora inquired, one brow rising up into an arch. “Did you yourself not offer to do just that when we first met? Is that not precisely the reason why you hired that investigator?”
Lord Pemberton’s gaze never veered from hers. Yes, Leonora could see that he understood her meaning only too well.
“As far as I can tell,” Leonora continued, feeling slightly emboldened by taking charge of the conversation, “not knowing the man’s identity is not stopping you, is it?”
The corner of his mouth twitched as though he wished to smile. “The only difference is,” Lord Pemberton remarked, “that you do not have to fear for my life as I am no one to you.” He spoke evenly, and yet, Leonora could not help but think that he wanted her to contradict him. Before she could make any such reply though, he continued on, “You are determined not to involve them?”
Leonora nodded. What had happened to her had been painful enough. She would never be able to live with herself if anything happened to someone she loved because of her, because of her mistake, because of her error in judgment. No, she would not involve her family in this. Both, her father and her brother, were fiercely protective. She had seen their watchful glances over the past few months, concern etched into their eyes. She knew that her parents had more than once discussed her sudden change in behavior, urging her mother to draw her into conversation every once in a while, once more trying to determine what was going on.
Leonora hated lying to them and keeping things from them, and she knew that a better solution to sharing what had happened would be to simply solve the problem. Then she could return to her old self, and everything would be as it once was.
“What about your brother-in-law?” Lord Pemberton inquired, although the look in his eyes suggested that he himself did not fully approve of this solution, either.
Leonora shook her head no. Although she did care for Phineas, she was coming to look at him as another brother, the thought of sharing this with him seemed…wrong somehow. Not that she could think of any kind of objective reason for that emotion; however, that seemed to be the norm as of late. “I cannot.”
Lord Pemberton raked a hand through his hair, a bit of an exasperated look coming to his eyes. “Is there an alternative you can think of?”
For a moment, Leonora did not dare speak for the alternative that immediately came to mind was one she ought not consider at all. Still, his proposition did make sense, and she longed to find a solution to this constant fear, this need to look over her shoulder, to doubt everyone she met. And so, Leonora forced her eyes off the floor. “You.”
His shoulders tensed, and aside from the way his teeth seemed to grit together, he remained perfectly still. His gray eyes continued to linger upon her face, searching, as though he doubted her words, their genuineness. “Are you certain you want this?”
Sinking her teeth into her lower lip, Leonora nodded, not certain at all, but equally afraid to step back.
Lord Pemberton kept his eyes fixed upon her, the intensity in them growing. “Are you aware that I would have to approach you?”
Despite her best efforts, Leonora felt herself flinch.
Lord Pemberton’s gaze widened in answer. “I would have to step closer,” he elaborated, no doubt in order to change her mind. “As close as I did earlier tonight when I thought you an intruder.”
Leonora drew in a shuddering breath, remembering the way he had seized her arms. She could still feel his hands upon her shoulders, pressing her against the wall. He had loomed over her like a beast, shrouded in shadows, and she had felt small and vulnerable and frightened.
And yet, she had known that it had been him. That had made all the difference, had it not? For although she had been frightened, fear had not overwhelmed her in that moment. Despite his closeness, she had still trusted him. She had understood her mistake the moment he had seized her, realizing what he had to be thinking, finding a cloaked figure in his home in the middle of the night. She had known that he was not attacking her, but merely defending himself. Would she be able to bear his closeness again? His touch? At least for the purposes of training?
Raising her chin, Leonora held his gaze. “I understand, and I agree.”
Surprise lit up his eyes, and for a long moment, he simply stared at her. “Are you certain?”
“I am. I have tried everything I can think of myself and failed. I am tired of feeling helpless, of constantly looking over my shoulder. I simply want it to stop, and your suggestion does have merit. It makes sense.” She heaved a deep, exasperated sigh. “For the first time in so long, something makes sense. I cannot walk away from it.” She eyed him curiously. “And I think you know that. Otherwise, you would not have written to me, that sense of urgency between the lines.”
Lord Pemberton nodded in agreement. “Very well.”
“When shall we begin?”
“As soon as you feel comfortable.”
Biting her lip, Leonora turned away and began to pace in front of the windows, the curtains now drawn. “I suppose I could slip away in the afternoons,” she mumbled to herself as she continued to move. “Everyone will be busy doing one thing or another.” She glanced up at him. “I often spend my time with Louisa, but now that she has been married, I suppose I will have free time. I’ll speak to Grandma Edie. She will help me and cover for me if need be.”
Out of the corner of her eye, Leonora noticed Lord Pemberton taking a step toward her, a quizzical expression upon his face. “Your grandmother knows that you come over here?”
Leonora smiled at the memory of that mischievous look upon her grandmother’s face. “She does,” Leonora confirmed, enjoying the way his jaw dropped. “In fact, she’s the one who encouraged me to trust you, trust myself, my heart, my judgment.”
Something flashed over Lord Pemberton’s face that Leonora wished she could understand. It spoke not merely of surprise or even disapproval but suggested a deeper meaning as though her words had touched him somehow…and he knew not what to do with it. “I suggest in preparation for our training,” Lord Pemberton stated all of a sudden, his voice very matter-of-fact, “you begin lifting weights in order to give yourself more strength.”
“Weights?” Leonora frowned. “What do you mean?”
His eyes darted from side to side as he thought. “I suppose, a jug of water will do. Begin with a small one or one not filled to the top. Try and lift it, repeatedly.”
Leonora nodded eagerly, feeling a surge of energy at the prospect of stepping out of that passive corner and finally doing something. “I will.” She heaved a deep sigh. “Thank you.” She smiled at him before she moved her gaze to the door. “I better return home.”
Lord Pemberton nodded, then took a step back in order to let her pass. His eyes remained on her though, and she could feel them upon her even when her back was turned, and she stood by the door. Once more looking over her shoulder, she bid him a good night and left. She slipped the hood of her cloak once more over her head and pulled it deep into her face, hoping she would not encounter another soul on her way back.
When she finally sank into bed, her head finding its place upon the pillow, Leonora was exhausted…but her heart felt lighter than it had in a long time. That night, she fell asleep with a smile upon her face.
Chapter Thirteen
Preparing for an Attack
From Lady Leonora, Drake knew what functions she and her family would frequent, and in order to keep a better eye on her, he decided to attend as well. He kept reminding himself that his sole motivation was to watch over her, to fulfill his promise and ensure that she was safe. However, deep down, Drake knew that he was simply curious. He wanted to know more about her and her family. He wanted to see them together, to see them interact, to see her in a social setting.
And so, Drake found himself in a darkened corner of Lady Weatherby’s ballroom, perfectly content to stay back and merely observe. Never had he been one to mingle for he simply did not enjoy mingling and conversing with others. He disliked the superficial chitchat that passed between acquaintances at social gatherings. To him, it was a waste of time for it did not lead to a deeper understanding of another’s character.
Yet, that night afforded Drake a thorough insight into Lady Leonora’s family. They were, indeed, rather loud and boisterous, cheerful people. They laughed and danced and talked to one another, never drifting far apart. They truly seemed to enjoy one another’s company, whispered words passing here and there and secret glances exchanged often between the two youngest sisters. Indeed, Drake also noted Lord and Lady Whickerton’s watchful eyes constantly sweeping over all their children. It was subtle as both seemed very much devoted to one another. Still, they never seemed to miss anything.
Except for the night of the masquerade.
Only the dowager countess had somehow taken note. Drake still could not be certain what had happened, and he did not wish to pry. Quite obviously, Lady Leonora did not wish to speak of that night, which was understandable.
At some point during the evening, Drake caught the dowager countess’ eye. He could not help but think that a fair amount of mischief rested in her gaze, rather unusual for a woman her age. If he was not at all mistaken, she even grinned at him once before her gaze moved over to her granddaughter. What had Lady Leonora told him? That her grandmother had been the one who had encouraged her to place her trust in him?
Drake frowned. Why would the dowager countess do that? After all, she did not know him. She did not know his character. They had spoken to one another a grand total of one time. How could she be certain that he deserved Lady Leonora’s trust? That he would not betray it? That he—?
Drake tensed when he saw a young lord move across the dance floor toward Lady Leonora. He recognized him immediately as Lord Sedgwick, the young man he had deterred more than once at the Christmas house party.
Immediately, Drake’s gaze moved to Lady Leonora, trying to determine how she felt about the other man’s approach. He could see her shoulders tense and her fingers close more tightly around the glass she was holding. Nonetheless, she lifted her chin, and he could see her inhaling one deep breath after another. For a moment, her lips seemed to move as though she was whispering something to herself, and then Lord Sedgwick stood before her, offering her a kind smile and no doubt a polite greeting.
Words were exchanged, and Drake wished he could hear what was being said. Still, Lady Leonora remained safely cocooned in the presence of her family, her demeanor kind and brave. So brave. For Drake could see the fluttering of her nerves and the way she sometimes dropped her gaze, the way she shifted on her feet and the way she would every so often look in his direction, her eyes meeting his. He wondered why she did so, unable to believe that he could be the one giving her strength in that moment. Why was it that she trusted him?
It was a mystery to Drake, and he was not quite certain he deserved it.
Deserved to be trusted.
Deserved her trust.
Over the course of the next week, Drake attended two more of these social functions, observing how Lord Sedgwick as well as Lord Gillingham occasionally approached Lady Leonora, offering to fetch her a drink or asking her to dance. The first offer she generally accepted while she always declined the second. Drake took notice of her family’s watchful eyes, slightly confused frowns appearing on their faces here and there. Still, Drake was glad to see that neither parents nor her elder brother urged her into a match.
Drake knew that she was trying, doing her utmost to find her way back to some sense of normalcy. He could see perhaps better than anyone else the strength it took for her to remain, to smile and to converse.
And then the day of their first training session came and Drake found himself at odds, pacing his study like a caged lion, unable to make sense of this tension that lingered within him.
Indeed, she was putting herself at risk by coming over here. If they were found alone together, she would most definitely be ruined. Yet, it was not that concern that had him on edge. It was, indeed, the trust she placed in him, the hope that what he had suggested would finally set her free. But what if it did not?
In order to ensure her safety as much as he could, Drake had given most his staff the afternoon off. He had drawn the curtains on the street-facing side of the house, ensuring that Lady Leonora would not be seen by anyone.
And then she suddenly stood in the door frame to his study, that black cloak once more draped upon her shoulders, the hood drawn deep into her face. She looked at him curiously, a hint of shyness in her eyes as she looked down at the simple linen dress she had chosen that day. “Will this do? I wasn’t quite certain what to wear?”
Drake nodded, his throat suddenly dry as he gestured for her to come inside. “Does the dowager countess know that you are here?”
Removing her cloak, Lady Leonora placed it on the back rest of a chair. “She does. I told her everything, and she will make up an excuse if someone should notice my absence.”
Drake took note of the soft rose upon her cheeks. “I must admit, your grandmother is a fairly unusual woman.”
A soft chuckle drifted from her lips. “I assure you; you are not the first one to think so.”
“Then why would she allow it? Even encourage it? Is she not aware of the risks that are involv—?”
“There are always risks,” Lady Leonora interrupted, her hand suddenly balled into fists at her sides. Her eyes were hard as they looked into his, and she breathed in deeply, seeking to calm herself. “I suppose, she believes that in this case the risks are worth it considering what I have to gain.”
Not wishing to upset her, Drake merely nodded and refrained from voicing any further doubts. “Very well. Shall we begin?”
A slight tremor shook her delicate frame, but she lifted her chin and nodded. “What first?”
Drake held her gaze. “First, I shall approach you.”
Again, she tensed, but nodded.
Drake was about to take a step toward her when he stopped himself. “Do I have your permission?” he asked, wanting her to know that he would not act against her will.
Ever.
A knowing smile flitted across her face. “You do.” Again, her hands balled into fists as she kept herself from retreating.
Looking into her eyes, Drake took a step toward her. “Tell me how this makes you feel.”
Lady Leonora blinked a couple of times, and he could see her mind beginning to analyze her own reaction. “My pulse is quickened, and I feel every muscle in my body tensing. My breath is coming faster and—”
Drake took another step toward her, and she clamped her lips shut, staring at him. “I will not harm you,” he told her earnestly, his gaze not veering from hers. “Do you believe me?”
Lady Leonora nodded. “I do.”
“Then breathe,” Drake instructed as he continued to move closer. “In and out. In and out. Look into my eyes and nowhere else.”
