The Hate Between Us, page 9
Jason was glaring at me, making every inch I crossed feel like a mile. My cheeks were burning as my eyes unwillingly dropped to his lips. The lips I’d get to kiss soon. Oh God.
Ms. Holloway smiled warmly at me. “You’re here, Katie. Great.”
“You’re late,” Jason complained before I could apologize.
The group shared looks, and my skin prickled, because they had a front row seat to what was shaping up to be a new argument between me and Jason. As if everything wasn’t awkward enough already.
“Mr. Fay had to talk to me after PE,” I lied. “I came here as soon as possible.” The moment I said it, I felt angry at myself. Why was I justifying myself to him?
Jason rested his arm against the back of his chair and stretched his legs out. “You can’t even show up on time. We haven’t even begun, and you’re already messing things up.”
Ms. Holloway frowned at him. “Jason, that’s absolutely no way to treat Katie. I thought we’d discussed this, but I’ll ask you again to please leave your differences outside the theater doors. We have about two months to prepare, and I want us to shine on that stage when the day comes. That means hard work. Giving it two hundred percent.”
Jason’s lips remained shut, but his scowl didn’t disappear. Ms. Holloway invited me to join the circle, but not before she told me to not be late next time.
“I generally don’t tolerate tardiness, so make sure you’re always here on time.”
I nodded, my cheeks red, and apologized to everyone before I moved to take the empty spot, telling myself to just ignore how close Jason would be to me. But it was easier said than done. I avoided looking at him, studying others instead.
Most of the cast were seniors. Stella was seated across from me and Tallie was next to her. I’d seen the cast list on the announcement board. Stella got the roles of the narrator and Chloe’s best friend Vanessa, and Tallie was cast as Chloe’s mom. Next to her was Lucas, a junior, who played Chloe’s dad. On Jason’s other side was Jimmy, playing the role of Nathan’s foster dad.
Jimmy met my gaze. He didn’t look away, and I wondered why his eyes always seemed to look for me. His brows dipped almost imperceptibly, and his gaze turned unnervingly intense. Briefly, I got the feeling that he knew something I didn’t.
Huh. Weird.
I had to look away, turning my attention to the rest of the cast.
Across from Jimmy, I recognized Lori, another senior, who had been cast as Nathan’s mom. Seated on my left was Ling Fu, playing the role of one of Chloe’s classmates. The rest of the cast was a mix of juniors, seniors, and sophomores I vaguely remembered from drama club last year.
Everyone looked eager to start, and despite having to put up with Jason, I felt myself getting excited. This was reminding me why acting had been my passion—there was something liberating about jumping into someone else’s life for a while. I could be anyone I wanted, live any kind of life.
“Alright, let’s go over the deets,” Ms. Holloway said, motioning at the script booklet in her lap before she passed me my copy. “The Promise of Tomorrow is a three-act play. It’s somewhat different than what we usually do here, but we chose it over several dozen other scripts because it has everything we’re looking for to mark the centennial—a story that will carry the themes that truthfully represent the values this school honors—courage, loyalty, and love. It will also showcase the talent of our students in the best way possible and underline that Lake Gate High is the home of great minds.”
I could swear Jason muttered something into his chin that sounded like “What talent? For stupidity?”
No one else seemed to hear him, but that didn’t lessen the burden settling in my chest. I flexed my hand and willed myself to focus solely on our teacher and not on him.
“Chloe and Nathan come from difficult backgrounds. One is living in poverty, and another is a victim of the foster care system. In the beginning, their friendship starts on fragile legs because they can’t open up to each other easily, something they have to overcome. That creates emotionally charged moments, and eventually, makes their bond stronger. But then the real challenge comes in the form of Chloe’s cancer, and the pair must withstand and show tenacity during a time that seemingly has no happy ending.
“We will emphasize their fears, doubts, and anguish. But the focal point is hope. Hope and the love these two have for each other despite all the obstacles in their way.”
Ms. Holloway gave Amy a nod. Amy went on to explain the setting and offered some suggestions on how to visualize the characters.
“Since Katie is a wheelchair-user, we changed some parts to accommodate her, as you’ll see in your new scripts,” Ms. Holloway said, motioning with her hand at our scripts. “But they aren’t that significant. We’ll deal with the technical details as we go. Now, let’s start. I’ll be reading the stage directions. Stella, you go first.”
We opened our scripts to the first page. My heart picked up its pace, and my hands started trembling. The pounding of my heart was deafening in my ears.
As Stella and Ms. Holloway read, I used the chance to study Jason, who was getting visibly angrier by the minute. He was now sitting slumped in his chair with one leg extended and the other bent at the knee, glowering at the page like he wanted to incinerate it. One hand gripped his script while his other hand rested on his thigh, and I couldn’t draw my gaze away from his long fingers, the curve of his knuckles, or the Courage tattoo that blazed across the back of his left hand atop of the intricate pattern of his veins.
He wore black jeans with ripped knees and a gray T-shirt that clung to his defined torso, topped off with leather bracelets on his left wrist. His biceps stretching the sleeves of his T-shirt called for attention, which I gave . . . for far too long, as it turned out, because he caught me staring at him, already waiting on me.
He wasn’t the only one. The whole group was waiting on me, and I realized it was my turn to read. Shit.
“Katie?” Ms. Holloway prodded.
I cleared my throat. “Right! Right.” My cheeks felt like two blotches of red, which I tried to ignore as I quickly and silently read the stage directions:
Chloe and Nathan are in the park. Nathan is sitting on a bench. He has a bruise under his eye and wears a sullen expression. Chloe passes just then. She looks for her phone in her bag and drops it in front of Nathan as she pulls it out. He picks up the phone, and she sees the screen is cracked.
I drew my brows down with a frown and sucked in a sharp breath. “Oh no! Just my luck.”
Ms. Holloway read the next stage direction.
“My mom will kill me,” I continued.
“At least it still works,” Jason said in a disinterested manner.
“But I just got this phone. And it’s already cracked.”
Jason’s face was supposed to be doubtful here, but his expression was annoyed. His eyes cut to me, as if trying to say I was overacting, before he read, “That model? It looks old.”
The blush coating my cheeks had nothing to do with Chloe’s embarrassment of being poor. It had everything to do with Jason’s aversion. “It’s used.”
A movement across from me caught my eye, and I looked up to see Tallie staring at me. There was no malice in her gaze, but I could see she wasn’t quite sure how she’d lost the role to me.
Shame materialized inside of me, but I didn’t have time to dwell on it, because Jason had finished his line and was waiting for me, his leg continuously bouncing. I read my line, but he didn’t continue, glaring at me instead.
Ms. Holloway arched her brow. “Jason?”
I silently begged him to continue, to not make this harder for me. Everyone was more than aware of our hostility, and they looked between us as though they were watching a tennis match, expecting a showdown.
With his lips pressed together tightly, Jason returned his gaze to the script.
We continued reading our lines, but everything felt strained, and I didn’t miss the prodding looks Ms. Holloway gave us. I wanted to tell her this was what she’d signed up for when she chose to put me and Jason in this together, but the truth was, I wanted this to work. I’d already felt like a failure enough. I didn’t need another failure on the resume of my life.
But if I thought the beginning was hard, the scenes where Chloe and Nathan confessed love to each other were torture. I was sure that if Tallie were Chloe, Jason would’ve acted out every moment, every affectionate look and soft-spoken line. His voice would’ve been an incredible instrument—it would’ve carried out every inflection, expressed every emotion effortlessly, just like it had always had. He would’ve been more than convincing in the role of a guy in love even during a cold reading.
With me as Chloe, his acting was like running nails over a blackboard—grating and wearing. He looked as though he could strangle me at any moment, and there was zero chemistry. I didn’t know how Ms. Holloway thought we would have chemistry. She must’ve been drunk when she said that.
I counted the minutes until we reached the end, and once we were done, everyone looked rather relieved that Jason and I hadn’t started a war. Ms. Holloway opened a discussion, asking us about our thoughts on our characters and the story. She and Amy answered a few questions about some of the characters’ motivations, unresolved sub-plots, and such, before Jason said, “My only problem is her portrayal of Chloe. If she’s not overdoing it, she’s flat.”
Redness suffused my cheeks. Hadn’t he humiliated me enough?
“It’s not like you were perfect either,” I said.
“I can only do so much when I have you in front of me. You—”
“Enough,” Ms. Holloway told us.
Amy shifted in her chair, her gaze dropping. I wouldn’t be surprised if she was already regretting that I’d been cast as Chloe.
“That’ll be it for today, everyone,” Ms. Holloway said. “You did well.”
I lowered my head in shame. The others had done well. They’d practically saved this.
“The first rehearsal is on Tuesday at the same time. Use the weekend to study your characters. See how you can build them. And don’t forget to bring your scripts.”
The chairs scraped the floor as the others stood one by one. Jason was the first to get to his feet, swinging his backpack onto his shoulder.
Ms. Holloway stood up. “Jason, I want you to stay. You too, Katie.”
Jason assumed a wide stance, clutching the strap of his backpack. “I have to get to work.”
“This won’t take long.”
His glare landed on me, but he didn’t say anything else. He dropped his backpack and returned to his chair. Ms. Holloway waited for the room to clear before she sat back down in her chair.
“Neither of you were up to par today. Jason, you looked like you were on the verge of throwing a tantrum at any moment, and I’ve never heard an ‘I love you’ that sounded more ominous than yours. Katie, you looked as though you were on the verge of crying, and no, it didn’t look like you were in character.” She adjusted her glasses and entwined her hands on her lap. “I understand that you two aren’t each other’s favorite person, but you have to let go of that if you want this to work. At least while you’re here. Once we get there”—she pointed at the stage—“I want you to be a cut above the rest. You two hold this play together, and all eyes will be on you.”
Jason snorted. He rested his elbows on his widely-spread knees. “What you’re asking is impossible.”
“That’s not the attitude I expect from you, Jason. I’m quite surprised, seeing that you’ve always acted like a professional. There have been times in the past that I had to ask you to do something that would give pause to someone else, but you always took it on without a single protest. And now, you’re letting something interfere with your character because you can’t put your differences aside. Once you’re on stage, there’s no ‘you’ anymore. Only your character.”
“I know, but—”
“I already told you an agent all the way from L.A. will be here,” she interrupted him. “This is certainly your ticket to best performing arts colleges and eventually Hollywood. You don’t want to mess this up for yourself.”
I waited for Jason to contradict her, but he didn’t, remaining mute. I looked between them with wide eyes. There would be an agent?
My hands started sweating. The stakes were getting higher. And I was just a girl in a wheelchair.
“Are you sure your choice to cast me as Chloe was right? Seeing that this play is so important?”
“I’ll answer that for you,” Jason piped in before Ms. Holloway could say anything. “It absolutely wasn’t.”
“Jason, zip it,” Ms. Holloway said in a stern tone that would make anyone tremble. “Katie, we’ve already discussed this. Twice. It’s okay to have doubts, but don’t let them deter you. And forget about Jason. When you’re on stage, you’re not with Jason. You’re with Nathan. And I need to see that connection between you. I need to see you gradually starting to trust him and then falling for him. I need to see you love him.”
She leveled her gaze at Jason. “The same goes for you. You’re going to embrace Chloe with everything you have. Support her through all her highs and lows. You’re going to be her anchor and guardian angel. You’re going to cry tears for her that the audience will feel deep in their hearts. And when the moment comes for you to say ‘I love you,’ you’re going to mean it. Do you understand?”
Jason fisted his hands against his thighs as he divided a dark look between me and Ms. Holloway. His nostrils flared on a sharp breath.
“And that’s another thing I wanted to tell you—you two are going to do your best to make your kisses convincing. You know we don’t do stage kisses here, especially not with this kind of story. We need it to be as real as possible. So, when you kiss, I want sparks flying. I want passion. And to achieve that, you’re going to start with getting to know each other better.”
Jason sat up in his chair, the storm in his eyes growing more violent. “What do you mean?”
“Once each week, you two will meet and spend time talking to each other. Talk about anything that would help you get a better sense of one another. Plus, you can use that time to practice your scenes together. Pick whatever place works best for you and do it for at least an hour. And I’ll be checking. If I see that your connection hasn’t improved, I’ll cut your marks in English.”
“What?” I gasped, while at the same time, Jason clipped out, “You can’t do that.”
“I can, and I will, so you better not push me on this. Do you understand me?”
I nodded, a huge lump in my throat.
Jason looked so mad I was sure he would quit right this moment. “I have a part-time job on top of this. My time is already stretched too thin.”
“I’m sure you’ll find a way, Jason.” Her voice sent a clear message—don’t mess this up or I’ll mess your grade.
A muscle in his cheek rippled. He flexed and then unflexed his hands. For a moment, I was sure he would give it up and leave.
“Fine,” he finally said, leaving me open-mouthed. He was that desperate to get scouted, huh?
Ms. Holloway was as pleased as Punch. “Good. Then we have it settled. Off you go, and good luck.”
Once home, I took myself to the back porch, staring off into space without actually seeing anything. This was a disaster in the making. Getting to know each other better? Passionate kisses?
My vision distorted, and I had to blink away my tears.
I’d never even kissed anyone before, and now not only would my first kiss be acted out, but I’d also have to make it convincing. And the worst part of it was that I couldn’t go to Jason and ask him for help with . . . with kissing.
I felt a pang in my chest. If I admitted to him that I’d never been kissed before, he would have a field day with me. He would laugh at me. Relentlessly.
The first tear slid down my cheek, quickly followed by a second one. The sun cast mesmerizing colors over our backyard, amplifying the beauty of the intricate flowers adorning a patch of ground near the fence. The wind picked up and carried leaves across the yard in a pattern that begged for attention. But it took my mind off the bad stuff only for a moment.
There was no way Jason would ever let me get to know him better. As for me, my insecurities had already taken the best of me. I didn’t need to open up to someone who would only put me down.
I sniffled and brushed my tears away, but they kept coming, and the familiar feeling of worthlessness returned to haunt me. I was going to play the main character in a play half the town would see. But I’d never felt more like a fraud than now.
“Honey?” My dad came out and sat in a chair beside me. “Why are you crying? Are you okay?”
I scrubbed the tears off my face. “It’s nothing. Don’t worry.”
“It’s not nothing. Tell me everything that’s on your mind.” He placed his hand on mine and gave it a hard squeeze. His soft voice created a pulsing ache in my chest and invited fresh tears. The whole summer I’d been putting up a front, especially with him, but seeing his concern now was my undoing.
“I feel like I’m not good enough to be in that play. I feel like any moment now someone will tell me it was a mistake. I feel inadequate, Dad.”
“You’re not inadequate, honey. Far from it. You’ve always enjoyed acting, and you’ve done amazing. Your teacher wouldn’t have picked you if she felt that you weren’t a good fit.”
Ms. Holloway had said the same. “That’s not all. The male lead? It’s Jason Adams.”
Dad’s brows dipped low. “Is he still treating you badly?”
“He doesn’t miss a chance to insult me. He’s not happy that he has to act with me.”
His expression turned pensive as he looked off into the distance. “I see.”
“And now Ms. Holloway has this vision of us two getting along. She wants us to get to know each other better, and I just know it’s going to be a disaster.”
He patted my hand. “Maybe it won’t be. Maybe he just needs some time to digest it all.”
