Autumn Dreams at Mermaids Point, page 20
‘Nerissa.’
There was something in the way he said her name, a tone she’d not heard before. For a second she believed it might be a quiet echo of the yearning she felt inside. She wanted to turn to him, to see what she was feeling reflected in his eyes. Or perhaps it was all in her head and she would turn and see nothing at all.
She raised her hand and waved without looking, not sure she was ready for the reality of either of those things. ‘Won’t be long.’ She hurried down the path after Max, hoping her voice hadn’t sounded as loud and forced to Tom as it had to her.
Having agreed with Max he could let Toby off the lead as long as they stayed further up the beach and well away from the water’s edge, she turned her face into the combination of stinging salt spray and rain and let go of everything other than the majesty of the scene before her.
Wild, white horses rode high on the cresting waves, pounding towards the shore in a fury of foam that washed higher with each gust of the wind. It didn’t take long for the sea to work its magic, the churning chaos of it making the turmoil inside her seem pathetic in comparison. Give it to the sea. Reaching beneath the collar of her coat, Nerissa unhooked her necklace and tucked it and the ring it held safely into her pocket. ‘Goodbye, Gareth.’ The wind stole the words from her lips and carried them away out over the ocean. She waited for the pain to strike but felt only peace.
Feeling more settled, she turned her back to the water and watched Max and Toby racing around in circles. Momentum had taken them further along the beach and she was happy to stroll in their wake, close enough to call a warning if they strayed too close to the sea and still be alone with her thoughts.
She’d closed off one path – the other… well, where to start? It was time to face facts. She liked Tom. Could probably stretch to more than liking him under the right circumstances, but it was too soon. And it wasn’t because she was expecting perfection – whatever Sylvia might think about it – it was because she was afraid that it wasn’t Tom she was falling for. It was the idea of him. Everything she’d always wanted had all but landed in her lap – an attractive, intelligent man and two terrific children to fill the terrible aching gap that had always been a corner of her heart. A ready-made family for her to slot into. It was all just a bit too convenient. A bit too good to be true.
And besides, they’d already had, and then lost, the perfect piece that completed their family jigsaw. No matter how hard she might want to slot herself into that empty space, her edges and corners were shaped differently. She wasn’t Anna. She could never be her – never wanted to try to be her.
It would take some time, but she would find a way to steer the right course. If she couldn’t, then perhaps she’d have to think again about her current living arrangements. She let it sit for a moment and it felt like the right thing. For everyone.
‘Ready to head back?’ she asked when Max and Toby came racing over to join her. The rain hadn’t got any worse, but the storm wasn’t going anywhere either.
‘Do we have to?’ He sounded so disappointed that she couldn’t help but smile. There’d be plenty of nights when he’d be stuck indoors because of the weather so no harm in letting him run free while he had the chance.
‘Not straight away, but we shouldn’t stay out too long.’ They’d already made it quite a distance along the beach, so if the weather turned now it would be a soggy trudge back to the surgery.
Delighted at the reprieve, he bounced on his heels as though he had more energy inside than his body could contain. ‘Can we race to the fence then?’
Nerissa eyed the structure which had been erected a few years back to keep tourists away from the caves at the end of the beach. ‘I’m not sure I can run that far,’ she said, doubtfully.
‘Not you, silly!’ Max exclaimed. ‘I meant me and Toby could have a race.’
‘Oh, well, that’s a relief. Off you go then, but move a bit closer to the wall and watch out for rocks.’
‘I will!’ The wind snatched his words away as the boy sprinted off, cutting a diagonal path up the beach at first until he was just a few feet from the wall that lined the edge of the beach where it met the base of the point of land which had given the village its name.
A sharp gust of wind tried to tug her hat from her head and Nerissa quickened her pace. By the time she reached them, Max was trying to climb up on the first rung of the fence, but he couldn’t get any purchase because of the wire netting blocking the gaps.
‘Why can’t we go down there?’ he asked when she told him to get down.
‘Because it’s not safe. Come on now, we’d better be heading back.’
‘But I want to know what’s down there,’ he insisted, one hand still threaded through the loops of the netting.
‘A few caves and lots of rocks.’ A rattle of sleety rain came lashing in on the wind. ‘Come on, Max, before we get soaked to the skin!’ When she tugged his arm, he reluctantly let go and began to follow her, all but dragging his feet across the pebbles. Toby had plastered himself to her side, more than ready to be out of the rain, and Nerissa quickened her pace, hoping Max would get the message and hurry up.
By the time she reached the steps and had stopped to clip Toby’s lead back on, Max had caught her up. ‘Can we explore the caves, some time?’
Nerissa shook her head, giving him a little push to get him moving up the steps. ‘They used to be open, but there were too many close calls, so the decision was made to fence them off. It’s a shame. We used to love going there when we were kids, but we also understood the tides and how quickly conditions can change. It’s not the same for people who just come visiting – they don’t have the same respect for the sea.’
‘People like me, you mean?’ He sounded so forlorn that she took a minute to remind herself how young he was, and how easy it was for words to be misinterpreted. Fitting in anywhere new would be hard; all the more so in a small community like the Point where some didn’t welcome those they deemed to be outsiders.
Nerissa paused to tug his hood up over his already wet hair before she smoothed a hand over his cold cheek. ‘Not like you, because the Point is your home now.’ When he brightened, she knew she was on the right track. ‘You listen to what you are told, and you’re becoming more aware of the risks living so close to the sea can pose. Like just now, you knew it wasn’t safe to be too close to the water because of the storm.’
‘And the tide is coming in? That’s what it means when the water covers up more of the beach, right?’
‘That’s right. I’ve got an app on my phone that tells me each day what the tide times are, and what the weather and sea conditions are going to be. Remind me when we get home and I’ll help you download it.’
The darkening sky lit up suddenly as lightning streaked across the clouds, followed moments later by a huge clap of thunder which echoed off the buildings, making them both jump.
‘I don’t want to be out here,’ Max said, a little tremble in his voice.
‘Me neither.’ She held out a hand, an instinctive act to offer comfort. When he took it with a grateful smile her heart swelled with affection. Things might be complicated when it came to his father, but this boy she would cherish for as long as it was within her power to do so. ‘Come on, let’s run!’
21
Tom tried to concentrate on his documentary, but he couldn’t settle. After he’d lost the thread of what was happening for the third time in ten minutes, he gave up and switched it off.
Tossing the remote on the coffee table, he stood and crossed to the large bay window and stared up at the darkening sky. Maybe he should’ve gone with them after all. He shook the thought away almost as soon as it formed. Nerissa was sensible and smart, and a damn sight more familiar with the weather conditions than he was. The worst that could happen was they’d get soaking wet and need a hot bath or shower to warm up when they got in.
On the heels of that realisation, he went upstairs and opened the airing cupboard to switch on the immersion heater. There’d been a few mornings when the four of them hadn’t spaced out their morning ablutions quite enough and the unlucky last one in the bathroom had endured a cold shower. Tom now made a point of setting his alarm a good forty minutes earlier so he could be in and out before he had to worry about getting the children up for school. He grabbed an armful of spare towels while he was at it and took them down to the kitchen, where he set about filling the kettle and laying out things to make hot chocolate. Lastly, he retrieved a couple of the older towels Nerissa kept stored in the cupboard under the stairs with various other bits of doggy paraphernalia. He spread one out across Toby’s basket and laid the other across the threshold of the back door. There wasn’t much more he could do, so he wandered back upstairs to check in on Emily.
When he knocked and entered, she was sitting cross-legged on her bed, laptop balanced on a pillow in front of her and her headphones in.
‘I’m making hot chocolate for when Max and Nerissa get back – do you fancy a mug?’
Emily glanced towards the window where the rain was now hammering against the pane and pulled a face. ‘They went out in this? They must be mad.’
‘Well, it wasn’t quite this bad when they set out, and Toby needed a walk.’ Tom found his gaze wandering back towards the window. It wasn’t quite four o’clock but the sky was almost pitch black with the heaviness of the cloud cover.
‘Still. Rather them than me. And yes to the hot chocolate, please. Do you want me to come down?’
Tom shook his head. ‘I can bring it up if you’re busy.’ It was the most diplomatic way he could think of to ask what she was up to without seeming to pry.
‘I’m watching a version of Twelfth Night I found on Sky Arts.’ She turned her screen so he could see the paused programme. ‘It’s one of the set texts, and I know it’s one of the questions I messed up so I thought this might help me.’
‘That’s a great idea. But don’t forget it’s Saturday night, sweetheart. You don’t have to study all the time.’ She was really getting to grips with what she needed to do to prepare for her resits, and he was proud of the way she’d taken control of it. ‘And you know if there’s anything you want to talk through with me, I’m more than happy to help.’
‘I thought you did Macbeth when you were at school?’
‘I did, but I downloaded Twelfth Night onto my Kindle and I’ve been reading it. It’s a lot more fun than I remember, though it’s taking a while to get my head around the language again. It’s been a long time and my poor old brain isn’t what it used to be.’
She ducked her head, then looked up at him. ‘You didn’t have to do that.’
Tom came to sit on the edge of her bed, reaching out to tuck a stray strand of her long hair behind her ear. ‘Yeah, I think I did. I left you to manage on your own too much, Em, but not this time.’
‘Thanks, Daddy.’ She leaned forward to clasp her arms around him in a quick hug. ‘I can save this on the planner and then maybe we can sit down and watch it together?’
‘It’s a date.’ He kissed her forehead. ‘Speaking of which, don’t forget it’s movie night tonight.’
Emily rolled her eyes. ‘But it’s Max’s pick and it’ll be some terrible superhero movie. Can’t I stay up here?’
He’d instigated movie night as something he’d hoped they could do as a family, but so far it’d been a bit hit-and-miss as they’d argued over film choices. In the end, he’d set up a simple rotation policy, but even that didn’t seem to work very well. If he insisted she join them, it would only get Emily’s back up and she’d sulk through the whole thing. She’d also do her best to spoil Max’s enjoyment of it with a barrage of snarky comments. She seemed happy enough with what she was doing, so while he wished she didn’t spend quite so much time in her room, there wasn’t much point in rocking the boat. ‘Okay then. But maybe we can put our heads together and come up with something we might all enjoy next time?’
‘I’ll make a list,’ she promised. ‘Thanks, Dad.’ She pecked a kiss on his cheek, then gave him a sly grin. ‘Do I still get popcorn?’
‘Now you’re pushing your luck,’ he said, but knew he would make her a huge bowl of it just to see her smile like that at him again. He stood up, resting a hand on her head. She was growing up so quickly, he felt like he needed to pause and take a mental snapshot of little moments like this before she was off and flying her own path away from him. ‘Marshmallows in your hot chocolate?’
‘Ooh, yes!’
He left her then and she was already tucking her headphones back in before he’d gone. When he came back a few minutes later, he tried not to disturb her, just set the mug down on her bedside table, then closed the door quietly behind him.
He milled around in the kitchen for a few minutes, not quite sure what to do with himself. The rain was still coming down in sheets and he was tempted again to throw on his coat and go out searching for them. Surely they’d have started making their way back as soon as it had turned really bad?
Deciding he’d give it five more minutes, he tugged open the fridge and contemplated its contents. Nerissa had bought some home-made burgers from the butchers after the kids had pestered her for them. They wouldn’t be as good as when Andrew had done them on the barbecue, but Tom could handle the grill. He rummaged in the freezer and found some rolls. They probably wouldn’t defrost in time, but he could split them and stick them in the toaster. A bit of salad, a few oven chips and everyone would be happy – and Nerissa would be free to enjoy her evening in peace.
The windows lit up as a bolt of lightning flashed followed by a huge boom of thunder. Right, that was it. Slamming shut the freezer, Tom marched to the hallway to grab his coat and shove his feet into his boots. He was still zipping it up as he yanked open the back door only to come face to face with three drowned rats – well, two drowned rats and a very soggy retriever.
‘Get in, get in.’ He stepped out of the way, holding the door for them as they scrambled in, just managing to grab Toby’s collar before the dog got away and covered the kitchen floor with paw prints. He was rewarded for his pains with an absolute drenching when Toby gave himself a vigorous shake.
‘At least you had the foresight to put your coat on,’ Nerissa said with a rueful grin as she stripped off her own, followed by her very droopy hat.
‘Lucky me.’ Tom managed to get the door shut, then urged Toby towards his basket. ‘There’s towels on the table.’ He pointed to the stack he’d left as he bent down to wrap the ends of the one he’d put in the basket around the dog’s back and began to rub his coat dry. Content to be pampered, Toby lay on his side only raising his head when Tom showed any signs of stopping.
Nerissa took charge of Max, stripping off the jumper he’d been wearing under his coat, which was wet across the shoulders and down his back.
‘I guess we need to look for a proper waterproof jacket for you,’ Tom said as he watched Nerissa bundle his son into a big towel, then use a smaller one to rub the water from his hair, much the same as he was doing to the dog’s fur. Her own hair was plastered down her back and around her face. Rivulets of water ran from it across her reddened, windblown cheeks, but she paid them no mind until she was sure Max was sorted out.
Tom couldn’t help but notice the way his boy was grinning up at her, or the way she tapped his nose with a finger when she finished. The back of his eyes started to burn, the threat of tears taking him so off guard he had to look away and blink hard to ward them off. When he was sure he wouldn’t make a complete fool of himself, he gave the dog one last rub before tugging free the damp towel and chucking it on the floor near the back door.
Going to the sink, he washed his hands, then flipped the kettle on once he’d dried them. ‘I put the immersion on if you want a hot bath,’ he said to Nerissa, leaning against the kitchen worktop. ‘And I’ve got stuff ready to make hot chocolate, or a cup of tea if you want to take a hot drink up with you.’
‘That sounds heavenly.’ She’d picked up a towel and was squeezing her long curls through it, the pale cotton already darkening from the amount of water in her hair. ‘But I’ll probably just jump in the shower as I’ll need to think about dinner soon.’
‘Already covered,’ Tom said with a grin as he folded his arms across his chest. ‘Burgers and salad and oven chips.’
‘Yes!’ Max fist-pumped the air. ‘Can I have two burgers?’
Tom laughed. ‘One and a half – I’ll split the spare one with you. Run upstairs and hop in the shower quickly so that Nerissa can have a bath, and then you might as well put your pjs on. It’s just you and me for movie night – your sister has spurned the offer of our company.’
‘Are we having popcorn?’ Max asked, before he turned to Nerissa. ‘Will you come to movie night? We’re watching Avengers Endgame – it’s amazing! All the superheroes are in it – Captain America, Iron Man, Black Panther, Hulk—’
Tom cut him off before he could bore poor Nerissa to death with a list of the entire cast of the movie. ‘You’ve taken up enough of Nerissa’s time today when it’s supposed to be her day off.’
‘Oh.’ Max’s face fell and Tom felt about as good as he might after kicking a puppy. He was delighted with how well the pair were getting on. It was clear Max had been starving for a bit of female affection, but he also needed to make sure they didn’t take advantage of her good nature and kind heart. His children were not her responsibility, after all.
‘Thanks for the invite, Max, but you two should enjoy a boys’ night together. I’ll be fine upstairs. I’ve got a new book I want to start.’
‘But…’ Max looked between the two of them, a pleading expression on his face.
