“I said I hope you don’t trip on your way to work. Your eyes have been on that ring since you came down for breakfast.”

  Hope’s sadness at her situation pulled down at the corners of her offered smile.

  “I know. I’m going to give it back to Billy today. With the cake fight and all, I—just didn’t have a chance last night.”

  Aggie came to stand next to Hope, a kind hand on her shoulder. “Are you sure this is what you want, Hope? You know, real love doesn’t come around but once. I’d hate to see you miss out on your opportunity for true love, my dear.”

  “I know, Aggie. I wish I could say yes. With all my heart I wish it. But Billy and I don’t see eye to eye on some pretty important things. I’m not sure how two people who are so wrong for each other can possibly make each other happy. It isn’t possible, right?”

  The large grandfather clock in the hallway dinged the hour. “Oh, what time is it? I’m going to be late for work.”

  “But it’s Saturday.” Aggie reminded her.

  “I know, but Doc Howard wanted to teach me about what to do in case someone is shot. It’s really hard to learn much with patients coming in and out of the office all day. Besides, my work will give me something to think about besides—Billy. Hope grabbed Aggie and hugged her. “Thank you for caring about me, Aggie, but I think I’ve made the right decision.” She turned to the hall tree next to the clock and grabbed her coat and gloves.

  Five minutes later, she was walking up the boardwalk toward the doctor’s office. The ring on her finger tucked away safely inside her glove. She’d intended to stop in and check on Faith this morning, but because she had dawdled too long at home, she didn’t have the time now. Doc would be expecting her.

  “Good morning, Hope,” the doctor greeted her when she entered the office. “I hear last night’s dance was the party of the year. I’m sorry I missed it.”

  Hope couldn’t help rolling her eyes at her boss. “It was a night to remember, that much is for certain.”

  “Let me get a good look at that ring.” Doc Howard stood and she removed her coat and gloves, extending her hand to him. “Now that’s quite the ring. Looks like Billy Buchanan has great taste. I hope you both will be very happy. Wait. Isn’t it on the wrong hand for an engaged woman?”

  Hope stuck her hand behind her back. “I guess you didn’t hear how the evening ended? Billy asked me to marry him, but I didn’t exactly say yes and he took quite the exception to it.” Hope left out all the other parts of their conversation.

  “Why not?” Doc Howard quizzed her.

  “Why not what? Accept his proposal?” Hope was stalling because she wasn’t sure she had a good answer for the doctor’s question. “It’s complicated. He wants me to move up to his cabin on the mountain and I can’t do my job from there. He’s already planned out our life without taking my plans into consideration. He wants me to have children right away and cook and clean and he isn’t willing to even consider an alternative lifestyle for the two of us. He didn’t even talk to me about any of this before he proposed in front of the whole town. Besides, I’m not sure we are a good match. We both have things from our pasts that—bother us.”

  Doc Howard sat down at his desk. “I see. Well, things have a way of working out as they were intended. Just give it time. Are you opposed to having children? You seem so good with them. I guess I just assumed there would be children in your future.”

  Hope’s gaze dropped to her shoes.

  “Did I say something wrong?” Doc questioned.

  “No, it’s just—I really want to learn everything I can about midwifery and medicine and herbs. I want to help women and their families get the medical attention they are too embarrassed to ask for it or too poor to pay for. It’s not that I don’t want to have a baby. I do. Lots of them. I want a whole house full of them. I just don’t want to have to choose between a family and helping people’s suffering. I think I can do both.”

  “Ah, yes, I remember Billy saying something about that. He seemed quite sure he knew what the divine plan was for all of us.”

  Hope wasn’t sure what Doc was talking about. “I don’t know anything about a divine plan, but he doesn’t think I can do both. He hasn’t really even considered the possibility I don’t think. It all boils down to the fact that it is what he wants—me at home raising children, taking care of him and a house on the mountain, but I am convinced I can do so much more—be so much more. Do you understand what I’m trying to say, Doc.”

  Hope watched her friend and mentor smile and shake his head in understanding. “I do, more than you think. That’s one of the reasons I decided to become a doctor myself.”

  “Is that why you never married? You haven’t found a woman who is willing to share you with your patients or understands when you have to be away?” Hope questioned the man hoping to gain insight into his situation that would lead to her understanding of her own situation with Billy.

  She watched him pause, a sad look darkened his usual sunny disposition. It was gone in an instant and she thought perhaps she imagined it.

  “Nah, I’m just too set in my ways to entertain the idea of taking on a wife. I’m too fond of my bachelor ways. Now, I think a chance of subject would do us both good. Let’s get right to our lesson today regarding the process of repairing bone-headed men when they decide to play with guns. Your lesson today is about the damage a bullet can do inside a man’s body and what we, as medical professionals, need to know to fix it.”

  Billy readied his team of six draft horses and hitched them to his boss’s wagon. He was headed up the mountain with more supplies to build his cabin. Last night’s embarrassment in front of the whole damn town seared images into his brain like a hot branding iron. He couldn’t wait to leave it all behind.

  “Headed to the cabin, I see.” John slapped him on the back from behind.

  His friend had caught him off-guard and it took a few seconds for Billy to respond. “Yep, I thought I’d spend the day framing in the rest of the roof. I’d really like to get the doors on and the windows boarded up to keep critters out until spring. I plan on making a haul down to South Fork for lumber tomorrow.”

  “What if you had a little help?” John offered.

  “You wanna help me build on my cabin? Don’t you have more important things to do than waste your day helping me?” Billy chided his friend. He finished with the last horse’s harness and made ready to drive them down to get his supplies from the hardware store.

  “I don’t consider helping my best friend a waste of time. Grace and Abbie Rose are spending the day with Faith. I’ve got some time until they are ready to head home. Whattaya say?”

  Billy offered his friend a smile even though he didn’t feel much like grinnin’ after last night. “I’d say you don’t have to worry about me getting’ drunk and causin’ trouble. And after today, I’m leavin’ town for a few days to lick my wounds and decide what to do next. I was bettin’ on Hope and that cabin, but now it looks like all I got is that cabin, so I’m gonna make it the nicest place around. With the exception of yours, of course.”

  “You’ll figure it all out, Billy. Things don’t always turn out the way they start out. Who’s to say Hope won’t regret her decision? I think if you give her time, she’ll come around, but—”

  Billy watched John hesitate and knew his friend wanted to say more. “Just say it, John. I ain’t gonna get mad. I ain’t got it in me today.”

  John nodded. “Billy, you got a way of pushin’ that puts people off. When you get your mind set to somethin’, you just don’t let go and you don’t change your mind either. Ease up on things and just see where they go. You might be surprised.”

  John’s words punched him in the gut as hard as any physical punch could have done. That was exactly what he had done the day he confronted Lizzie with the truth Bobby had thrown in his face. He was furious when Bobby bragged about sleeping with big dumb John Malone’s wife. His brother laughed and said Malone was too stupid to see what was in front of his eyes.

  Billy had been livid and he had almost called his brother out, but he was afraid if he wasn’t fast enough to beat him, then he wouldn’t be around to stop Bobby and Lizzie from breaking John’s heart and he couldn’t leave that situation to chance. Not with his no good snake-of-a-brother runnin’ the show.

  Billy loved this big guy. He had somehow managed to remain friends with him after Billy’s stupid attempt to disguise the reasons behind Lizzie’s death. He had covered her infidelity with his confession. It had been a gamble, and so far ,it had paid off.

  “Now, whattaya say about me helping ya out today?” John’s grin told him he wasn’t waiting on an answer.

  Billy grinned and slapped him on the shoulder. “I say daylight’s a burnin’. Let’s get these supplies up to the place I call heaven on earth.”

  John slapped him back with his giant meaty paw, leaving a stinging imprint on Billy’s back. The man had no idea how strong he was. Billy shook it off and laughed with pure joy at the prospect he and his best friend were going to spend the day together in the quiet calm of his mountain oasis. Did life get any better? A momentary sadness reminded him, yes, it could have. If Hope had just agreed to marry him and move with him to the beautiful wilds of these Rocky Mountains, his life would have been about as perfect as a man could expect. But she hadn’t.

  He climbed aboard the big freight wagon along with his friend and they rode side-by-side in companionable silence into the calming forests that made Billy feel whole again.

  Two and a half hours later, they pulled up in front of his nearly finished cabin. They made quick work of unhitching the drafts and watering them from the nearby creek. John tied a picket line just outside their work area and then began the arduous task of unloading the supplies from the wagon.

  Billy pulled the stack of tin sheets off the wagon’s bed and piled them next to the cabin. He hoped to finish the roof of his cabin today. “Let’s get to it, shall we?” He turned to find the nail tin when John stopped him.

  His friend was quiet for a bit and Billy grew concerned. “Is something wrong?”

  “I wanted to ask you about your brother’s comment last night.”

  Billy froze in place, fear gnawing at the peace and happiness he had enjoyed just moments ago. “What comment? You know Bobby, John. He’s always spouting off something. He’s too stupid to know when to shut up.” Billy tried humor to deflect what he knew was coming. It didn’t work.

  “The comment where he said it was too bad she didn’t get to make her own decision without someone sticking their nose into business that waddunt theirs to meddle in. What decision could Bobby have been referring to? Is there something more that happened that day you haven’t told me? Cause if there is, as my best friend, I would expect you to tell me everything about the day Lizzie and my son died.”

  Billy’s mind raced for something to say. What could he say? If he told John the truth, could John forgive him for keeping Lizzie’s cheatin’ from him? Billy could justify it all by claiming to protect his friend from the god-awful truth, but would John even believe the truth now after all this time?

  Should Billy continue to protect his friend from Lizzie’s deceit, or should he come clean and finally tell John the ugly truth about his wife? The decision was like a bullet to his heart. John was waiting on his answer.

  Billy needed time to think this through. He hadn’t made the sacrifice to take the blame and protect Lizzy just to ruin John’s life now that he had a chance at happiness with Grace and Abbie Rose. So, he stalled.

  “Damn it, John. You know what Bobby is capable of. He has no regard for anyone but himself. The only reason he was there last night was to screw me over.”

  Billy watched John ponder his comment for a minute. His heart pounded deep in his chest. He didn’t like lying to John, but what choice did he have at this point but to keep on lyin’.

  He swore one day he was gonna make that son of a bitch brother pay for all the stupid selfish things he had done to hurt the people Billy loved.

  “Yeah, I can see Bobby doin’ that, but there was something in his face that said he knew something that I didn’t. Is there something you know, Billy? Something that I don’t?”

  Billy stood on the precipice of indecision. What would the truth do to John’s current happiness? Would his friend’s anger force him to seek retribution from Bobby? John was a big strong man. He could beat Bobby in a fight. But a gunfight? Not a chance.

  “Billy? Is there something you need to tell me?” John repeated.

  There was no way Billy could turn tail and run now. He had gone too far down this road to give it all up because of his stupid ass brother’s selfish agenda. “John, it’s like I said before. Lizzie fell down the stairs and it caused her to go into labor. Blood was everywhere. I carried her up the stairs and helped her as much as I knew how when the baby came. I tried to stop the bleeding, but nothing worked. The baby never took a breath. I wish I could tell you something different, but I can’t. It’s the horrible truth. I wish I had never gone to your house that day and I wish Bobby would go to hell because all he’s doin’ is stirrin’ up trouble between you and me.”

  John remained quiet for a minute or two before he spoke. “Yeah, I can see Bobby doin’ that. He always was a mean son-of-a-bitch, no offense to your momma and all, but he’s always stirrin’ up trouble anytime he could. Guess he’s still doin’ it.” John nodded in agreement.

  “Bobby never has been one to give a crap what people thought. If the truth be known, I think he likes the fear he sees on people’s faces when he comes around. It gives him a sense of power he can’t get by being respectable.”

  Billy watched John nod in agreement again. “Yeah, it was like that when Lizzie was still alive. He was always turning up at places me and Lizzie went. All the time. I even caught him talking to Lizzie in town, more than once, and I told him if he didn’t stay away from her, I’d use him for bear bait.” John grinned and flexed his fist. “I think he got the message.”

  Billy’s heartbeat pounded against his ribs. He knew Bobby would never get the message until he was good and ready and the only message he got was to be more careful when he and Lizzie snuck off together. “Yeah, Bobby talks loud, but he’s a piece of chicken sh—”

  “Don’t get all riled up, Billy. I’m sorry I brought it up. How about we get started on this fancy new cabin of yours?” John offered.

  Billy took a deep breath to calm his anxiety. Bobby had come a little too close for comfort at telling John the truth about Lizzie. He needed to do something about that brother of his before it was too late. “Yeah, let’s get started.”

  After unloading the rest of the supplies, they each grabbed a hammer and got busy. John worked on getting the roof closed in. Billy worked on hinging the doors and putting on a foolproof latch to keep curious critters out. They both nailed up the boards of lumber across the window openings completely sealing the cozy cabin against the harsh elements of the winter still to come.

  Billy stood back and glanced at his cabin with pride. “It’s coming along don’t you think?”

  John stood beside him and gazed at Billy’s cabin. “Yeah. It will make a great home for you and your family. You know, it reminds me a lot of my cabin except for the porch, that is. Probably a good thing. You won’t have to worry about your pregnant wife falling and killing herself while you aren’t home.”

  Billy could hear the sadness in John’s voice. “John, you know Lizzie’s death wasn’t your fault.”

  John nodded. “Yeah, I finally got that through my head even though I still feel guilty about leaving her alone too much out there.”

  “I told you it wouldn’t have mattered if you were there or not. You couldn’t have saved her either.”

  “I suppose.” John shrugged his massive shoulders. “Well, let’s get back to town before it gets too late. I don’t want to be on the road after dark.”

  Billy and John latched the cabin doors, securing them so unwanted guests couldn’t break in and make a mess of things. They hitched up the drafts to the wagon and headed back to town.

  A half hour on the road to town and John let out a big belly laugh.

  Billy looked at him. “What’s so funny?”

  John grinned back. “I was just thinking about the look on everyone’s face when the cake crashed to the floor. Some folks didn’t know whether to run away or grab a fork and dig in. And Sheriff Grayson was beside himself. I swear Charity is going to send that man to an early grave. He don’t know whether to kiss her or kill her.”

  Billy laughed at the memory. “Yeah, that was one hell of a night, for sure. I promised myself when I proposed, it would be a night to remember and I guess it sure was something to remember. I just thought I’d have a bride-to-be at the end of the night. I didn’t plan on Hope turning me down. Again.”

  13

  Hope worked through the day learning the finer points of gunshot wounds before she met her sisters Charity and Faith at the Hanovers’ for lunch. Then, they all walked uptown to the dressmaker’s shop for the alternations Faith wanted to accommodate her swelling baby belly.

  Her usually disgruntled sister, Charity, was actually laughing and talking about the dance when she walked with them to the dressmakers.

  The change in Charity’s countenance was transforming when she smiled instead of the usual scowl on her face. She truly was a very beautiful woman. If she would just stop acting like a man, perhaps Sheriff Grayson would look at her the way she wanted him to.

  It was at that inopportune moment the man of her sister’s desires stepped inside the dressmaker’s shop on his afternoon rounds.

  “Good afternoon, ladies. There’s a winter storm—” He stopped short when he spied Charity standing next to a dress mannequin in the corner. Charity saw him immediately and rushed to greet him.

  “Hello, Sheriff. Any more thoughts about me riding in your posse? Sure was good to see you at the party last night. I was wondering if you had a change of heart about courtin’ me?” Hope thought the poor man was going to pass out.

 

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