Chasing the Phoenix, page 23
“Why would you want to do a thing that like?”
“Have you ever broken a wild horse, Dog Warrior?”
“Well … not recently,” Surplus admitted
Shrewd Fox almost smiled. “I have, many times. It is great sport to take a bone breaker of a stallion and make him dote upon you. Powerful Locomotive is a big man, strong and not overly burdened with intelligence. I have a fondness for his type. I will enjoy breaking him to my bit, spurs, and saddle.”
“I see.”
Darger, who had been sitting by silent during all this conversation, now said, “You are hiding something, Shrewd Fox.”
“Am I? Oh, I suppose there’s no need for secrecy now. The third thing I wanted from the Hidden Emperor, after being present for the humbling of my enemies and command over Powerful Locomotive, was to be chief executive officer not just of the Southern Army but of the entirety of his forces. With this victory, I am your commanding officer now, the both of you. Perfect Strategist, you would do well to remember that I will not tolerate your nonsense the way that Powerful Locomotive did. The familiarity with which you have been addressing me, for example, must cease immediately, never to be resumed, even in private. Do you understand me?”
Darger dipped his head. “Yes, Chief Executive Officer Shrewd Fox.”
“And, Dog Warrior, tell your family no more gambling, no more stealing, no more extortion rackets. These are not things that are done in a well-regulated militia. Make sure they understand that. If they step out of line even once, I will cut off the left hand of the redheaded wench who fancies herself your wife. And your own left paw as well.”
* * *
THE BATTLE took hours, and since the Immortals did not participate in the slaughter, at its conclusion they were the de facto winners. They simply waited until none of the surviving soldiers had the energy to fight any longer and then sent messengers under flags of truce to negotiate their capitulations.
After the surrenders of the two nations were accepted and the processing of their soldiers into the Hidden Emperor’s army had begun, Darger took Surplus aside and said, “I want to thank you for your daring rescue of White Squall. I recognize that I mean nothing at all to her and that our relationship is one of convenience and opportunism only. And yet…”
“I quite understand,” Surplus said. Inwardly, however, he was already preparing his defense for having put his arms about the cao and whispering in her ear. For he knew that, later tonight, Fire Orchid would confront him on the matter, putting the worst possible interpretation on those totally innocent acts.
Shortly thereafter, the Dog Pack escorted Darger on a tour of the battlefield. The ground was chewed up, and the broken remains of machines both simple and sophisticated, as well as the corpses of men and animals, were scattered about, seemingly at random. “What a dreadful waste,” Surplus commented. Then, sternly, “Little Spider, put that down and get back up on your mountain horse. It is not fitting for a member of the Perfect Strategist’s bodyguard to loot corpses.”
Darger, as befit a dignitary, stared nobly off into the distance, pretending not to hear.
Little Spider opened her mouth to protest. Then she saw her Aunt Fire Orchid’s expression and bent down to restore the dagger her magpie heart had fallen for. As she straightened from the fallen soldier’s body, however, Surplus noticed a brief glint of metal and knew that she had left behind the knife’s scabbard but slipped the dagger itself up her sleeve. He let it pass, though, for the sake of morale and family harmony.
And he made a mental note to pick up something similar from the battlefield for Terrible Nuisance. Because otherwise, he was sure, he would never hear the end of it.
14.
When Shrewd Fox was young, she went from country to country, looking for a land worthy of her talents. The ruler of the Land South of the Clouds had over a hundred sons by various wives and concubines, all of whom were flighty and worthless. Having heard her boast that she could turn anyone into soldiers, he challenged her to do so with his offspring. “Give me absolute authority over them,” she said, “and I will.” When, on the first day of training, she ordered the young men to form up in orderly lines, they laughed and mocked her. So she had the two oldest immediately put to death.
Within a month, the king’s sons were as disciplined a group of soldiers as any in his land.
—STRANGE TALES OF THE SECOND WARRING STATES PERIOD
FREE HISTORICAL operas were performed in the city squares every day for a week, and there were fireworks every night to celebrate the arrival of peace and, not coincidentally, help reconcile the citizens of Opera to the sudden and unexpected change of rulers. Political prisoners were freed from the jails, and notorious war profiteers who abruptly found themselves without sponsors in the city government were thrown in. An office to promote trade with provinces with which they were no longer at war was opened, and the Bureau of Sabotage and Disease was closed. Competitive examinations were announced for five full scholarships to the Infallible Physician’s new medical college in Crossroads.
With the heartland nations of China conquered, the Hidden Emperor’s holdings were now vaster than anything that had existed since the fall of Utopia. Further, it was generally believed that the winds of destiny filled his ships’ sails and pushed upon his soldiers’ backs, driving them forward and hindering all who would stand against him.
Those who thought so knew nothing of the bickering within his inner circle. White Squall and Prince First-Born Splendor were no longer talking to each other, and so those generals who favored one or the other of them had split into rival factions. Meanwhile, the demoted General Powerful Locomotive sulked and stewed under his new superior’s control, while Shrewd Fox was apparently finding him more difficult to bring to heel than she had anticipated. The ceo, being a newcomer and an outsider, had no clique of her own, but she treated Powerful Locomotive’s partisans as if they were hers, to their general disgruntlement. Only Darger floated serenely above all the petty politics, a friend to all and an enemy to none.
Or so it seemed.
There was no direct way for Darger to get to see Ceo Shrewd Fox, for she had appointed trusted officers from her old Three Gorges command to her personal staff and directed them to keep him away from her. But Darger had only to convince General Powerful Locomotive that such a meeting would help his cause—or causes, for he had newly added restoration of his lost rank to the attainment of White Squall as a primary goal—to slip effortlessly through her defenses.
“What is it now?” Shrewd Fox said without looking up from her writing.
The silk rugs and brass lanterns in Shrewd Fox’s office were of the finest, as was the furniture. She sat behind a desk whose top was a thick slab of vat-grown walrus ivory, and her chair was a Utopian chrome and artificial leather antique. Anywhere else, such opulence would have been impressive; to find it inside a plain canvas tent was overwhelming.
“Ceo Shrewd Fox, I recognize that you distrust me and there is probably nothing to be done about that. But your understandable if misguided skepticism about my character should not prevent us from working together in amity. Remember that the Longhorn King of the Beautiful Country, when asked why he did not fire the head of his secret police, said that it was better that the miscreant be making water into the weeds from the shelter of the king’s tent than for him to be standing in the weeds directing his animus inward.”
“I underestimated you once. Never again.”
“Yet I have not been dismissed as an advisor to the emperor. Why?”
Shrewd Fox poured sand over her document and looked up at last. “Your name terrifies our enemies and therefore you are useful. Could I strip the name from the body, rest assured that your corpse would be decorating a gutter at this very instant.”
“Great ceo, there really is no need for such hostility!”
“Hostility? I rather like you. You remind me of myself. Looked at properly, my distrust is a compliment.”
“If so, then surely an advisor whose cunning approaches your own is a resource to be cultivated.”
“You are all tricks and illusion, Perfect Strategist—smoke and mirrors, straw men and empty cities. But, as I told the emperor, the next phase of this war will be to invade the Yellow Sea Alliance, and that is a power which is stronger than anything you have faced and not to be taken by surprise. This is a different sort of struggle than you are accustomed to. First we must seize South in order to have a base of operations. Then we will face armies that are collectively stronger than our own. So we will have to rely on our one great advantage—the fact that we have the Long River to our back and all the rich farmlands of central China under our control. Which means that provisioning our forces will be simple. The enemy, though formidable, cannot counter our army and defend its own farmlands at the same time. When they attack us in force, our rangers will burn their fields, granaries, and fishing boats. When they protect their farmers and fishermen, we will fall upon their scattered armies and take their cities. In this way, we will destroy the alliance’s ability to feed itself. Of course, this will take several years and inflict great suffering on a tremendous number of people. Are you, who are famous for your bloodless though admittedly brilliant ruses, prepared to support that sort of war?”
Darger did not hesitate for even an instant. “Of course I am, great ceo. Because my mathematics prove that it is necessary.”
“Now you’re just trying to make me underestimate you again. Go.”
* * *
PRINCE FIRST-BORN Splendor had commandeered the second floor of a hotel overlooking one of the squares where the free operas were being performed, so he could watch in comfort from its balcony. “What is this called?” he asked, scowling.
Sitting beside him, Darger accepted a cup of tea from a servant and said, “The Rape of Nanking. Nanking is a pre-Utopian name for South, the capital city of Commerce.”
“I find it distressing to watch.”
“It is about a distressing period in history.”
“Then the period is not a fit subject for an opera. Art should be beautiful, not ugly. It should be uplifting and redemptive. Art reassures us that life is good and that, however bad things may look at the moment, everything works out for the best in the end.”
“I would have said that in the end we all die, immortals included, and that all good things, not excluding the earth, the sun, and the universe, are transient as well. So that, logically, in the brief time allotted to us, we should be as kind to one another as is humanly possible and face the harsh facts of reality without fear or flinching. But then, as an immortal, I take the long view. Should you prefer entertainments whose sole purpose is to distract you from unpleasant truths, that is of course your choice.”
“If I want ugliness and truth, I have only to return to the battlefield.” Prince First-Born Splendor turned his chair around so that he faced away from the opera. “Speaking of truth, I find myself more and more distrusting your glib and endless reassurances. Particularly in light of Powerful Locomotive’s disgrace.”
“How can you doubt me? I engineered that disgrace solely to benefit you. Powerful Locomotive is now in no position to place you upon the Dragon Throne in the tragic case that our beloved emperor dies shortly after attaining it. That is half of what you wanted, and, to be honest, the more difficult half.”
“I fail to see how that helps me. My personal happiness must necessarily come second to my duty to keep Southern Gate a free and independent state. If Powerful Locomotive never becomes emperor…”
“That is the beauty of our scheme. Ceo Shrewd Fox is an ambitious woman who, when the Hidden Emperor is murdered, will reflexively claim the throne for herself. Acting swiftly, however, Powerful Locomotive will denounce her as a regicide and execute her on the spot. An independent inquiry—which I shall lead—will find definitive proof that she was guilty. In the light of his heroic act, the general will then be the obvious choice to be made emperor by acclamation. This leaves only the two of us knowing the truth of what actually happened. Murdering us would draw suspicion back to the new emperor, so he will have no choice but to buy us off—me with great wealth and you with your nation’s freedom. A plot so simple cannot possibly fail.”
“Perhaps,” Prince First-Born Splendor said dubiously. “But White Squall—”
“She is mad with jealousy. All that is needed now is to make her pliant and obedient.”
“How?”
“I have plans.” Darger lied. “Allow them some time to ripen and you shall see. In the meantime, have you spoken to the Hidden Emperor, as I requested?”
“Yes. He says that he will not meet with you because you are untrustworthy.”
“I! Untrustworthy? Did he say why?”
“When I asked, he said that you would know.”
“Yet I do not. I have examined my conscience and it is spotless. The entire situation is most peculiar,” Darger said. He put down his empty glass, and a servant cleared it away.
* * *
THAT NIGHT, White Squall rode Darger sweaty. Then, rolling over so she could stare up at the fireworks, she berated him for his lack of success in making Prince First-Born Splendor the ambitious courtier she desired him to be.
“Madam, you do me a disservice. I have been working tirelessly on your behalf,” Darger protested. “You were jealous of Ceo Shrewd Fox and demanded I get rid of her as a rival. So I did.”
“She is still alive.”
“It was not necessary for her to die, and to demand it now would be mere vindictiveness on your part.” Darger felt about for the blanket that had been cast aside in the throes of their passion. They were in the sheltered rooftop garden of an inn that Darger had claimed for his own. But there was no getting around the fact that it was just a little late in the year to be outside at night without any clothing.
“She has put me in command of the Division of Chimeras and Resurrected Beasts, overseeing the saber-toothed cavalry, Megatherium, feathered theropods, and whatever those loathsome things with the poisoned quills are. Meanwhile, the Division of Sappers and Archaeologists has been folded into the infantry. Surely that merits death.”
“The fact that your new position as chief animal officer is no lower than your old rank strongly suggests that Shrewd Fox’s respect for you remains undiminished.”
“I am overseeing filthy, disgusting animals.”
“Simply pretend that your charges are smellier, less tractable, and more bloodthirsty versions of the machines you love. It is only a temporary position, after all. Once China has been reunited, I have no doubt that the Hidden Emperor will put you to work digging up more of your abominable machines of destruction.”
“I don’t like the way my prince moons about after her.”
“That is neither here nor there. Shrewd Fox is now obsessed with Powerful Locomotive—everyone sees that but him—and in consequence, Prince First-Born Splendor’s flirtations stand revealed as weak attempts to make you jealous.”
“Jealous! Of that toadstool? I feel almost as sorry for Powerful Locomotive for having such a creature pursuing him as I do for myself for having such a lackluster thing as you for a champion.”
“Examine my history, madam. I have been your truest and most vigorous friend through all of this.”
“So it would seem. Yet I cannot help thinking that there was more to all this than philanthropy.”
“You blackmailed me, remember? How much more motivation than that do I need?”
* * *
“I WAS a fool to have ever listened to you in the first place.” General Powerful Locomotive lifted a bowl of clear liquid to his lips and drank. He was sitting on a bluff overlooking the river and the fleet at rest upon it. Since he had brought only one chair, Darger was forced to stand. “Now I am disgraced and demoted, and my chances of winning White Squall’s love have vanished into the past, never to return. I gaze upon her today as I might a star and see only an unearthly beauty that is completely beyond my reach.”
“I remind you that your disgrace was your own doing. Had you followed my plan, as both the Hidden Emperor and I relied upon your doing…”
“Yes, yes, yes. I have told myself as much a thousand times and more.” Powerful Locomotive raised the bowl and sipped again. “But how was I to know that a plan so transparently ludicrous would actually work? Only an idiot could have come up with it. Only a fool would have followed it. Yet it worked. Incredible.”
“What is that you are drinking? Not alcohol, I hope! I warn you, sir, that if you are becoming a drunkard I must wash my hands of your fate.”
“What? Oh, no, it is just a pedagogical broth.” Powerful Locomotive offered the bowl for examination. “In times of dejection and despair, it is my custom to drown my sorrows in learning. It makes me a little distracted, of course, but better educated afterward.”
“That is, I suppose, admirable. But I must ask you to put the bowl aside and give me your full attention. We are finally making progress. Just yesterday, White Squall told me that she felt sorry for you because you were being courted by Shrewd Fox, a woman she feels is unworthy of you.”
“White Squall felt sorry for me?” Powerful Locomotive said, astonished. “Shrewd Fox is courting me?”
“Yes and yes.”
“How could this be? I hadn’t noticed the ceo displaying any particular warmth toward me.”
“That is because—and I say this with all due respect, General, but it is the only way to get your attention—in matters of the human heart, you are a self-involved lunkhead. If you doubt my word that Shrewd Fox is interested in you, simply give her a rose—just one! offhandedly!—and watch her eyes closely. You will see bloom within them the expression which in a woman means, ‘I have you now!’”
