Keeping just out of sight, she waited until the guard stepped out of his office to let her know that Tom was on his way, and as soon as he came into view she marched towards him in a determined fashion.

  ‘Tom!’

  It took the airman a moment or two to realise that Sergeant Thomas was in fact Aled’s friend Cadi. He eyed her accusingly. ‘I see you’re still using your rank.’

  She shook her head. ‘The guard was the same one who was on duty the day Jez died. He recognised me as soon as I got out of the taxi.’

  Tom shoved his hands in his pockets, and it was clear from his stance that he was anything but pleased to see her. ‘I would ask what I could do for you, but I guess I already know the answer to that.’

  She nodded. ‘I realise that my coming all the way out here might seem a little extreme, but Aled’s not left me any choice. I’ve tried contacting his parents, but the only thing I’ve learned is that they’re leaving Rhos.’

  Tom looked at her with genuine shock. ‘They’re leaving the farm?’

  She stared at him. ‘They’re giving up the tenancy. You didn’t know?’

  He shook his head. ‘It’s news to me.’

  ‘So it seems I’m not the only one who Aled’s keeping in the dark,’ said Cadi. She stared Tom straight in the eye. ‘Where is he, Tom?’

  He stared at the floor, grim-faced. ‘Have you heard the saying “Ask me no questions and I’ll tell you no lies”?’

  Cadi tutted impatiently. ‘Of course I have. I’m not a child!’

  He fixed her with a wooden stare. ‘I know you’re not.’

  Cadi placed one hand on her hip and rubbed her forehead with the other. ‘I don’t understand. Why doesn’t he want to talk to me? If nothing else, he should have the decency to pick up the phone and tell me that he doesn’t want to see me any more, not just ignore me in the hope that I’ll go away.’ With Tom remaining deathly silent, she continued desperately, ‘Has something happened to him? Is that why everyone’s being so evasive?’

  Tom stared at his boots. ‘Cadi, if I were able to tell you, do you not think I’d have done so by now?’

  A single tear trickled down her cheek. ‘Aled was right beside me when I lost Jez, the same as he was when I gave birth to Oscar. He even held my hand. How can someone like that turn their back on you for no reason? He’s acting like the spoilt, selfish little prig he was before he joined the RAF.’

  Tom lowered his gaze. ‘I wish I could help, I really do.’ He glanced back up. ‘I’m sorry, Cadi, but it might be best all round if you forget about Aled.’

  Cadi stared at him through her tears. ‘How can I?’

  He shrugged. ‘You’re going to have to find a way. Ta-ra, Cadi.’ He gave her a grim smile before turning on his heel and walking back the way he had come.

  Cadi returned to the taxi, more confused than she had been before speaking to Tom. As she slid on to the back seat she wondered whether she should’ve asked Tom if Aled had a new girlfriend, then dismissed the idea. The men in aircrew were more brothers than friends; if Aled had asked Tom to keep quiet about anything, no matter how petty it might seem to Tom, she had no doubt he would obey Aled’s wishes.

  Back at the tavern, Cadi told Poppy and Izzy what had happened.

  ‘There’s definitely more to this than meets the eye,’ conceded Poppy, ‘but we’re still none the wiser.’

  Izzy glanced at Poppy before speaking her thoughts. ‘What if Poppy and I put out a few feelers, see if anything comes back?’

  But Cadi was shaking her head. ‘Tom said I should forget about Aled, and maybe he’s right.’

  Poppy pursed her lips to one side. ‘Has it ever occurred to you that Aled might be avoiding you because he wants more than friendship?’

  Cadi stared at her friend open-mouthed. ‘No! Aled’s like a brother to me, and I’m like a sister to him.’

  Poppy pulled a face. ‘But what if Marnie was right, and Aled really doesn’t know how he feels about you? Or rather, what if he didn’t, but he does now?’

  Cadi still wasn’t convinced. ‘Surely I’d know?’

  ‘Not if he doesn’t know himself,’ said Poppy. ‘Look at everything he’s done for you.’ She began ticking the list off on her fingers. ‘He kept his distance because he knew that you loved Jez, he didn’t leave your side the night Jez passed, he held your hand whilst you gave birth. If you ask me, Aled’s in love with you, so much so that he can’t bear to be near you in case you guess how he feels.’

  Cadi stared at her friend open-mouthed. ‘If that’s the case, what do I do?’

  Izzy spoke without hesitation. ‘Leave well alone.’

  Cadi sighed breathily. ‘I wish we’d thought of this before I went to see Tom.’

  ‘Why? It wouldn’t have changed anything,’ said Poppy, ‘not if I’m right, that is.’

  ‘So, I’ve lost Carrie, Jez and now Aled,’ said Cadi sorrowfully. ‘You two will be the next to go.’

  Poppy linked her arm through Cadi’s. ‘We’ll never leave you.’

  Cadi smiled, grateful that the girls, at least, wouldn’t desert her. But deep down her heart was aching. Losing Jez had been the single worst thing that could have happened to her, but the thought of losing Aled felt like someone rubbing salt into her wounds. He was one of the best friends she’d ever had, and she wasn’t prepared to give up on him just yet.

  ‘I know you think it best that I leave sleeping dogs lie, but we’re making a lot of assumptions. I’m going to send him an invitation to the christening. If he cares about me as much as you seem to think he does, then he’ll turn up to do his duty.’

  Poppy eyed her quizzically. ‘That’s all very well, but where will you send the invitation?’

  ‘To his parents,’ said Cadi. ‘If anyone knows where he is, it’s them.’

  Back at the NAAFI, Tom waited for the operator to connect him, and asked to speak to Aled. When Aled’s voice finally came somewhat sullenly down the line, Tom filled him in on Cadi’s visit.

  ‘I’m a man of my word, Aled, you know that. But I felt a real heel lying to Cadi whilst she stood there in tears. I know you think what you’re doing is the best for her, but I think you’ve got it wrong. She deserves to know the truth, because this is torture for her.’

  ‘It’s not my fault she came to Finningley,’ said Aled, in a hoarse voice.

  ‘That’s where our opinions differ,’ said Tom plainly. ‘She only came because she’s desperate to see you. I know you think she’ll forget about you in time, but I don’t think she will. Besides, she’s bound to learn the truth sooner or later. If she’d asked the guard on the gate where you were, I’ve no doubt he would have told her, because he knows she used to be a sergeant in the WAAF.’

  ‘But she’s still none the wiser,’ said Aled, his voice barely above a whisper, ‘and that’s the way it must stay.’

  ‘Her family come from the same village as your parents,’ hissed Tom. ‘Did you know your parents were giving up their tenancy?’

  ‘Hardly my fault,’ said Aled.

  ‘Cadi called you a spoiled selfish prig, and quite frankly, I’m beginning to agree with her. If you thought anything of Cadi you’d put her out of her misery, and tell her the truth.’

  For the first time, Aled’s voice came clearly down the line. ‘Don’t you dare try and tell me how I feel about Cadi. I think the world of that woman …’ He stopped talking as he broke off into a series of coughs.

  Tom waited for them to stop before speaking his mind. ‘You love her.’

  ‘Enough to let her go,’ said Aled, his tone quiet once more.

  ‘Do you not think she deserves the chance to say goodbye?’

  The silence that followed was so prolonged that Tom began to wonder if they’d been cut off, and was just about to speak Aled’s name when his friend spoke again.

  ‘Don’t ask me to see the pain in her eyes, because I couldn’t bear it.’

  The operator cut in just then, and Tom rather thought she had been listening to the conversation by the thickness in her voice. ‘I’m afraid your time is up.’

  Tom could hear the grim smile in Aled’s voice as he replied, ‘Ain’t that the truth,’ and was about to say goodbye when the operator ended the call.

  Aled handed the handset back to the nurse, who tried to pass him a glass of water, which he waved away. ‘Is there anything I can do?’ she asked, somewhat timidly.

  Aled raised an eyebrow. ‘Not unless you want to give me one of your lungs, as well as a kidney, not to mention new legs.’

  The nurse’s cheeks turned pink. ‘I – I’m …’

  ‘Thought not,’ said Aled gruffly.

  The nurse turned away as an older, more experienced colleague approached. ‘I hope you’re not scaring my nurses again, Gunner Davies.’

  Aled shrugged petulantly. ‘If they will insist on asking stupid questions …’

  ‘Asking someone if they can help is not stupid, but refusing their help is.’

  ‘I don’t see why,’ muttered Aled. ‘It’s not as if she can do anything useful, such as put me back to the way I was.’

  The nurse shook her head. ‘She never said she could.’

  ‘Bloody doctors are nothing but a bunch of quacks,’ said Aled. ‘If I were a dog they’d put me to sleep, but instead they turn me into a vegetable when they should’ve left me to die, cos that would’ve been the humane thing to do.’

  The nurse strode over to the door of his room and closed it sharply before turning to face him, her arms folded across her chest. ‘When you first came in your friends told me that you were a fighter, someone who never gave up, and if anyone stood a chance of surviving it was you. They pleaded with the surgeons to save your life because they knew you wouldn’t waste it. To be honest, the way they were talking I was expecting someone like Douglas Bader, but instead I get the cowardly lion!’

  Aled heaved himself up on to his elbows. ‘How dare you speak to a dying man in that manner?’

  An air of defiance swept her features. ‘You can make the most of the time that’s left – which, by the way, might be a lot longer than you think if you fight for it. Or you can lie in that bed for the rest of your days, which could be months or even years from now. The choice is yours.’

  Aled looked horrified. ‘Years?’

  She nodded. ‘I was a nurse in the first lot, and I saw the difference between the men that fight and the men that give in. The ones that fight faced huge difficulties, no one’s denying that, but at least they’re living their lives, whereas the ones who choose to shut themselves away merely exist, and it’s not a pleasant existence.’

  ‘But why did the doctors make out I hadn’t a chance?’

  She smiled sympathetically. ‘Because of the seriousness of your wounds. But in fact no one knows how well you’ll mend; what they do know is that if you give up, so will your body. As a nurse I’ve seen the difference a little determination can make, and I know that where there’s a will, there’s a way.’

  He eyed her doubtfully. ‘Do you really think I could make it?’

  She laid a reassuring hand on his arm. ‘Not if you don’t try, but either way, it’s got to be better than staring at these four walls.’ She paused for a moment. ‘When you first came to, you said something about looking after a friend of yours?’

  ‘Cadi,’ Aled muttered.

  ‘Wouldn’t you like to see her again?’

  On this question, Aled was adamant. ‘She must never know. If she ever learns the truth, she’ll insist on looking after me, and I couldn’t stand that, when I’d promised to look after her.’

  ‘She must be awfully worried, not knowing where you are.’

  ‘She’ll get over it,’ said Aled stiffly.

  The nurse tried a different tack. ‘You said that you were going to look after her, but what does that mean exactly?’

  ‘I’d been putting money into her bank account on a regular basis …’ He gave a short, mirthless laugh. ‘I can’t even do that any more.’

  ‘Some people would prefer friendship over money,’ warned the nurse as she got to her feet. ‘Do you not think she’ll be hurt when the man she thought was her friend refuses to answer her calls, or reply to her letters?’

  Aled clenched his jaw. He couldn’t bear the thought of hurting Cadi, but if he were to do what was best for her, then that was the way it would have to be. He stared unseeingly into the distance. ‘She has plenty of friends. I’m sure they’ll see her right.’

  The nurse indicated the glass of water which Aled had refused. ‘If you’re going to push away everyone who loves you, you’re going to be a very lonely man; take it from someone who’s seen it happen too many times before. Even if you don’t want to see Cadi, the least you can do is allow your parents to visit.’

  Aled’s eyelids fluttered as he envisaged his mother’s reaction if she were to see him bed-bound and swathed in bandages. ‘Mam would just make things worse,’ he told the nurse. ‘She never wanted me to join the RAF, and neither did my father; I applied behind their backs. I know they’d never actually say “I told you so”, but that’s exactly what they’d be thinking, and they’d be right.’

  ‘Speaking as a mother, I know that your parents will just want you to be happy.’

  He gave another derisive snort. ‘Which is why I don’t want them visiting.’

  She appeared deep in thought. ‘Granted, so why don’t you get your act together and stop lying in bed feeling sorry for yourself?’

  For the first time in what seemed like months, Aled’s lips tweaked into a smile. ‘You’re a hard pill to swallow, Nurse Shelby, but I reckon you’re the best medicine this place has to offer!’

  March 1946

  It was the day of the christening, and Cadi stared down the aisle of the church with a heavy heart. Despite sending Aled an invitation, Cadi had heard nothing in reply. The man she had believed to be the best friend a woman could have, had turned his back on not just her but her son as well, and for that she could never forgive him.

  Suspecting that Aled might not turn up, she had asked Geoffrey to be ready to take his place, but even though he stepped up to the mark Aled’s absence cast a shadow over the occasion.

  ‘I really don’t understand it,’ Maria hissed to Bill. ‘He seemed so keen when he came to see them in Lincoln – more than.’

  ‘War does funny things to people,’ said Bill, ‘and whilst I can understand Cadi’s anger, I think she should give him the benefit of the doubt until we know what’s gone on.’

  ‘The girls think that Aled’s in love with Cadi, and that he can’t bear to be near her if he’s not with her,’ whispered Maria.

  Bill rubbed the back of his neck with the palm of his hand. ‘I s’pose it’s possible.’

  They fell silent as the vicar finished his piece, and Oscar bellowed his disapproval at having his forehead splashed with cold water.

  Bill grinned. ‘He’s got a proper set of lungs on him, ain’t he?’

  ‘I’ve heard you holler when the water in the ewer’s been colder than you expected,’ Maria retorted.

  ‘True.’ He placed his arm around his wife’s shoulders. ‘It would’ve been the icing on the cake if Aled had come, but as it stands, I hope she draws a line under it and moves on.’

  When the christening came to an end everyone began to make their way out of the church. Cadi left Raquel to fuss over Oscar whilst she caught up to Poppy and Geoffrey.

  ‘Thanks for stepping in, Geoff. I really appreciate it,’ she said, as she fell into step beside them.

  Geoffrey placed his arm around Cadi’s shoulder. ‘My pleasure—’ he began, before stopping short. ‘Cadi?’

  Cadi was staring fixedly at someone who was making his way out of the church gates. ‘Who was that? I don’t remember seeing him at the christening.’

  Geoffrey and Poppy both followed Cadi’s gaze. ‘No idea. Why?’

  Cadi shrugged. ‘Maybe it’s my imagination, but it seemed like he only left when he saw me looking.’

  ‘Probably visiting the grave of a loved one,’ suggested Poppy.

  Cadi nodded, but the niggling doubt remained that the man had only left because she’d looked in his direction.

  Chapter Ten

  August 1950

  Cadi began to wipe down the remaining table surfaces as she waited for the last of her customers to finish their meals and leave.

  The war had been over for five years, and a lot had changed in that time. Poppy and Geoffrey were married, and living in Blackpool with their two girls, Maisie who was three and Annabelle who wasn’t yet a year old. Izzy and Mike were also married, and just as Izzy had predicted they had moved abroad. Mike’s first posting had been to Germany, where Izzy had found work as an English tutor in a public school. After a couple of years in Germany Mike had been posted to France, and it was there that Izzy found out that she was pregnant. She had continued to work as a tutor right up to the birth of their daughter Fleur, after which she had invited private pupils into her home so that she could look after Fleur whilst earning a decent wage. Ronnie had married a man called Norman, whom she had met during the VE Day celebrations, and they had expanded her family’s business, opening a candyfloss stall on the promenade.

  When Dave went home to Scotland he and Kitty had retained a long-distance relationship for a while, but the separation had proved too great and their relationship had fizzled out within a matter of months. Kitty had been disheartened at losing her first love until she met Arthur, a local man who worked in the tobacco factory down the Stanley docks. Their friendship had quickly blossomed into romance, and they had married within a year of their meeting.

  Raquel had married Hank, one of the Americans she had met whilst in the WAAF. She refused to leave her grandson, so Hank had secured a posting to RAF Speke, and Raquel continued to work as a barmaid for Maria.

  Accepting the fact that Maria’s warning about the difficulties facing a single mother applying for a liquor licence had been well founded, Cadi had reverted to her original plan to open a tea room, and when the opportunity to rent a bakery on Great Homer Street came up had made sure that she was the first to view. When she entered the premises she headed straight for the kitchen, where she was horrified to see cockroaches scuttling for cover. Casting a brief eye around the rest of the room, she had moved into the shop area, where she found that the floor was smothered in rat droppings. Fearing that her dream was over before it had begun, she had turned to Kitty for advice. Kitty agreed to meet her at the bakery the very next day, and had been quick to put Cadi’s mind at ease by saying that the vermin could be easily eradicated, and that she firmly believed the former bakery could become a goldmine under the right management. So convinced was she that the tea room would thrive, she had suggested that the two of them could become partners.

 

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