Beyond the Footlights, page 13
“If I must.” Kilmer placed a knee on the bed next to Tanner’s hip and glowered down at him. His face was serious, but the light in his eye was all lust and adventure, overtaking what little remained of Tanner’s hesitation. He reached up to grip Kilmer by the shoulders and power him onto the bed.
Kilmer let Tanner yank him down, but the ensuing roll left Tanner on his back and Kilmer, still naked from the waist down, straddling him.
“Now what, Tex?” Tanner slid his hands under Kilmer’s shirt.
Kilmer eyed Tanner’s lips. “Want your mouth.” He stroked his dick, a hungry expression on his pretty features. Something else, less confident, lurked behind his gaze.
“Oh yeah?” Tanner gazed up at him, licking his lips at the thought of having them around Kilmer again. He wanted to encourage the confidence Kilmer was pushing to the fore.
“Yeah.” Kilmer raked away a few strands of Tanner’s hair that had caught in the short beard on Tanner’s cheek. “P-please.”
Tanner grinned. “Get it up here, then.” He shifted as Kilmer did, and found a comfortable angle to take his cock as his lover presented it and fed it between his lips. He was happy enough to let Kilmer lead, licking and swallowing around the easy thrusts. Kilmer’s head fell back, and Tanner let his hands wander over his thighs, along his calves and ankles, and up over his ass, enjoying the tickle of hair under his palms. When he was met with no protests or resistance, he continued his exploration, delving long fingers between Kilmer’s cheeks, and listened to the sweet, needy groan when his forefinger found Kilmer’s entrance.
He freed his mouth from Kilmer’s cock to inquire after lube and was rewarded with a tube of it hitting the mattress next to his elbow.
“You want me to concentrate on your cock?” He grinned as wicked as he could make it. “Or your ass?”
Kilmer stared, lips parted. His hands shook slightly, but he slapped his cock against Tanner’s lips.
“Cheeky.” Tanner kept the tease, and his tone, light and held the lube up. “You do it, then.” He held Kilmer’s gaze, steady, confident, and after a heartbeat Kilmer took the lube, flipped onto his back next to Tanner, and squeezed a dollop onto his own fingers.
The look of lusty concentration as he worked his own hole made Tanner’s dick finally take notice. He’d been a little envious of Kilmer’s quick recovery, but now his dick swelled and demanded attention of its own. His worry over Kilmer’s mood swings abated as Kilmer moaned.
This was nice. It was a good show, and it would be even better when Kilmer came undone for him. Slowly he stroked Kilmer’s cock, slicking a thumb over the tip every now and then, but he was more interested in seeing the other man’s face as he fingered himself and thrust into Tanner’s grip. He was gorgeous, losing himself to the sensations playing over his body.
Tanner lifted his free hand to Kilmer’s chest and played with a nipple.
Kilmer hissed and small desperate sounds came from him as his hips jerked spasmodically and he curled in on himself.
“Oh no,” Tanner told him, pressuring Kilmer’s shoulder to straighten him up. “You stay just like this and come for me. I want to see that.”
Kilmer’s voice cracked over a pleading sound and his cock jumped in Tanner’s hand. His body convulsed and the pressure of his shoulder against Tanner’s palm increased as he tried again to fold in.
“Beautiful,” Tanner whispered. “Just let it go. You’re okay.”
Kilmer moaned and came. It wasn’t a huge quantity, but the intensity of every muscle in his body contracting made the orgasm spectacular.
Then Kilmer sagged and whimpered, and Tanner smoothed a hand over his chest. “That’s good,” he soothed. “Perfect. It’s okay. I’ve got you.”
Kilmer snarled and tried to fight him, to sit up, but Tanner laid his lips softly over Kilmer’s and plucked gently, distracting him until he calmed and pulled in a shuddering breath.
“Two in less than an hour.” Tanner stroked Kilmer’s forehead and face. “Pretty impressive.”
Kilmer stared up at him, saying nothing.
Tanner would have remarked on the kind of training it might require for a guy to be that disciplined, but something in the softness of Kilmer’s expression, the vulnerability of it, stopped him. Kilmer almost looked like he was regrouping, steeling himself for more demands to be made on his already taxed body.
“Don’t move,” Tanner said, ignoring the light throb of his cock at the thoughts of what else the two of them might get up to. “I’m gonna get out of these jeans.” He waited for Kilmer to respond, but at first all he got was a soft huff of air as Kilmer closed his eyes.
“Yes, s—” Kilmer clamped his mouth shut and nodded.
In that instant, Tanner was glad Kilmer couldn’t see him, because he knew the flash of anger that lit him up inside showed on his face. He’d been right about the dynamic. But this wasn’t the face of a fulfilled submissive man. This was resignation. Perseverance. Drudgery.
Instead of saying anything for fear he’d give his emotions away, Tanner just laid a kiss on Kilmer’s cheek, slithered out of the bed, and peeled off his jeans. He left his T-shirt and boxers on and slid back in, covering both of them with the sheet and comforter.
When Kilmer didn’t open his eyes, Tanner kissed his cheek again. “You did good.”
Kilmer blinked and looked at him, his expression impossible to read. It was blank. Hooded. Hidden. Tanner cringed. What didn’t Kilmer want him to see?
“Should we let the dog in?” he asked finally, willing to take things in baby steps.
Kilmer glanced at him. “With us?”
“No?”
Kilmer’s expression lightened. “Yeah. Maybe he’d like that.”
“Sure.” Tanner thought maybe Kilmer would like the security of having the dog as a shield. He was fine with that. They were in no hurry. He got up and opened the door. The dog was right there, and he came in, circled a few times, and settled on the floor on Kilmer’s side of the bed.
“Huh.” Kilmer sank onto his pillow. “He always slept on Jacko’s side. Weird.”
Tanner didn’t think so, but he said nothing, instead propping himself up on one arm to look at Kilmer.
For a long time, Kilmer watched him in silence, as if waiting for something else. Eventually his eyelids drooped until the intensity of his observation eased to something less tense. His uneven shallow breathing steadied.
Tension he hadn’t been aware of eased, and Tanner wrapped an arm over Kilmer’s waist. Settling, Kilmer slid his hand over Tanner until he found a lock of Tanner’s hair. He stroked it, combing through the ends over and over, until the motion eventually slowed and stopped and he was lulled to sleep.
From where he lay, Tanner glared at the tiny bell sitting on the corner of the mantel. He managed to quash the urge to get up and stomp the thing into a little gold wreck. He knew enough to know what it was likely for, and he’d read enough of Kilmer’s body language to understand something that should have meant safety to him had a vastly different connotation.
He probably shouldn’t have had sex with the guy, but now that he had, he couldn’t talk his heart into believing it was a bad thing. He managed to ignore his head lecturing him that Kilmer wasn’t the type for one-night stands or one-off scenes and Tanner had better be prepared to break his own rules on that score.
“It’s gonna be fine,” he whispered and smiled into the dark when Kilmer shifted, burrowing a little deeper into the curve of Tanner’s embrace.
15
AT FIRST when Tanner woke, he thought he was alone in the bed. Then he realized his feet were weighted down, and a quick glimpse showed him the dog had sprawled out at the foot of the bed and pinned him from the knees down.
“Brat,” he muttered, shoving at the big animal until he huffed and scrabbled on his belly, up the bed to lay his head on Tanner’s chest.
“So he’s up, I take it,” Tanner said to the dog, scratching between his ears.
The dog yawned, showing off pointed teeth and an impressively bad case of doggy breath.
“Je-zuz!” Tanner shoved at the long muzzle playfully and the dog licked his fingers. As they tussled gently, the dog worked in a few of his distinctive vocal machinations that sounded exactly like he was telling Tanner the mysteries of universe, only Tanner was too imbecilic to understand.
“Whatever.” Tanner rubbed his hands vigorously over the wiry gray hair of the dog’s head and neck. “So where is he? I don’t hear anything breaking.” In fact he didn’t hear anything at all.
But the dog wasn’t freaking out, so Kilmer must have fed him and let him out to pee. He wasn’t in bed, so obviously….
“Did you eat him?”
The dog licked Tanner’s chin.
Tanner grimaced and turned his head. The pillow next to his was still indented, but the sheets were cool. He glanced out the window, then at the mantel. The bell was gone. Tanner frowned.
“Huh.” He sat up. “So—”
The front door banged open and a voice called. Tanner didn’t recognize it, nor did he hear what was said. Scrambling, he fumbled with his jeans as the dog jumped off the bed and ran, in full-ass-wag joy, for the front of the house, grinding out what was as near to a bark as he ever got.
So the dog knew whomever was walking into Kilmer’s house like he owned it. Tanner shoved a foot into his jeans, realized they were half inside out, and was hopping like an idiot to get them straightened out and up over his junk when a hulking form appeared in the doorway.
“Who the hell are you?” The voice was deep and melodic and very angry. “Where’s Kilmer?”
Tanner glanced up.
“V-Vance Ashcroft.”
“Where is Kilmer?” Vance’s face was a stormy configuration of pursed lips, narrowed eyes, and lowered brow. Tanner had always thought the star was gorgeous. Having him hover and glower like this didn’t change that opinion one bit.
“I—just woke up.” Tanner steadied himself and did his best to pull his jeans the rest of the way on in a dignified manner.
“Vance?” A lighter, easier-to-hear voice piped from the hallway behind Vance. “Not in the—oh!” The newcomer peered over Vance’s shoulder, bright red hair haloing freckled features.
Of course. Lenny Stevens. “I—” Tanner fought for a second with his own hair, to get it smoothed away from his face, and tucked a few unruly strands behind an ear. “Hi.” He held out a hand. “Tanner Jones.”
“Where. The fuck. Is Kilmer?”
“Don’t know.” Tanner took his hand back and straightened. “I just woke up myself. He was already gone. He’d fed the dog, I think, so.” He shrugged, realizing that didn’t mean much of anything.
“The dog?” Vance’s eyes narrowed even more. “Jacko left the dog with a friend. A bandmate.”
“Yes.” Tanner straightened. “Me. He left his dog with me and buggered off God only knows where. Asshole. Was he trying to mess with Kilmer’s head?”
“I—couldn’t say,” Vance replied after a heartbeat’s hesitation. “He only texts me. I don’t actually know where he is either. He’s planning to meet the rest of the crew in Toronto when we have the practice studio. Why the hell am I telling you this? Who the fuck are you?”
The front door banged open again, and Kilmer’s voice rang through the house loud enough for Tanner to hear Vance’s name and then close enough for the rest of his tirade to be clear. “Don’t be an asshole, Van! Tanner?”
“In here,” Tanner called.
“Shit.” Kilmer appeared in the doorway. “Went for take-out breakfast. Sorry.” He looked sheepish, his cheeks slightly flushed. “Vance. Len.” He shook his head and yanked on Lenny’s arm. “Come on. Leave him alone.”
Everyone trooped to the kitchen then, and Kilmer began fishing cardboard boxes out of the paper bags he’d brought. “Didn’t know if you guys would have eaten yet. I know Maggie doesn’t always cook on Saturdays.”
“Starved!” Len said, pulling a chair up to the table. “What’d you get?”
For the next few minutes, no one spoke as they handed food around and fetched enough chairs to seat all four men. Tanner fished forks and knives out of the drawer while Len got plates and Vance arranged the chairs, obviously noting every nuance of Tanner’s presence.
Once they all sat, Tanner looked across the table at Vance. “I would have loved to introduce myself properly, Mr. Ashcroft. In a more… professional… environment.”
Tanner wasn’t normally prone to blushing, but the glower Vance directed at him coupled with the amused light in Len’s eyes made his face heat. He quickly focused on his plate.
A moment later Len touched his forearm and he looked up. “How did you two meet?” Len forked eggs into his mouth and pinned a curious look on Tanner.
“At… the bar. I was singing. Kilmer came in to… um.”
“Drink,” Kilmer said flatly, drawing Tanner’s attention. “I was there to get pissed drunk, which I did.” He shot a look from Tanner to Vance, as if daring either one of them to make a deal out of it. No one did and he continued. “Tanner got me home. I hired him to help with the renos. That’s his day gig.”
Vance grunted, chewed, swallowed, then turned his glare on Tanner again. “So what part of being a singer or contractor puts you in Kilmer’s bed with his dog?”
“Vance!” Kilmer would have got to his feet, but Tanner put a hand over his where he’d clenched it into a fist on the table.
“That, I think, had more to do with the blow job from last night,” Tanner said, fixing a stare on Vance and daring him to make something of it. “I wasn’t aware he belonged to anyone.” He couldn’t stop his gaze flicking to Len for a split second, but he brought it back to Vance and stared him down.
“I don’t,” Kilmer said tightly. He jerked his hand free of Tanner’s, snatched up his coffee, and left his meal mostly untouched. “I’m going to go get started.”
“I’ll help!” Len offered, jumped to his feet, and grabbed his plate as he hurried after Kilmer into the other room.
Tanner kept glaring at Vance, who glared right back. Unable to hear Len and Kilmer, Tanner ignored the murmur of voices from the living room. It was too hard to hold his ground with Vance and try to concentrate enough to pick out what they were saying in the other room.
“Hey!” a slap of a hand on the wall made him jump, and he looked over to see Kilmer frowning at him. “When you’re done ignoring me, and—” He glowered and waved a hand at the table, encompassing Vance and Tanner. “—decide who wins the pissing contest, you bastards can let the dog out and clean up the dishes.”
Shit. The rumble of voices he had ignored had in part been directed at him and he hadn’t noticed. “Yeah, sure.” He nodded curtly and tried a smile, which Kilmer ignored. “No problem.” He turned back to the food. “Fuck.”
Vance made an annoyed noise and went back to silently shoveling food into his mouth.
“I am not going to hurt him,” Tanner said after a few minutes.
Vance said something Tanner didn’t catch because he’d been focused on his plate and Vance was speaking too quietly. Tanner looked up at him.
Vance furrowed his brow. “Well? Are you?” he asked, voice lifting into anger again.
“Am I what?”
Vance tilted his head. “Shit.” His eyes narrowed and he looked thoughtful. “I asked if you were fucking him. I didn’t think it was a complicated question.”
“What business is that of yours?”
“He’s not in a good place.”
Tanner snorted. “Thanks for the info, because I couldn’t quite tell from the fact he hardly sleeps, barely eats, and drinks too much.”
“He’s my friend. You think I shouldn’t worry?”
“I’m worried and I barely know him.”
“But you know him well enou….” Vance lowered his chin, looking at his plate as he shuffled food around, and his words got lost in the general hubbub of Len riling the dog up enough to make him “talk” and bump into tools that clattered to the floor.
“I’m sorry?” Tanner asked.
“I said, you know him well enough to sleep with him, though.”
“I hadn’t planned on that. It just happened.”
“He can’t afford for shit like that to ‘just happen,’” Vance snarled, his voice low and his body leaning over the table, almost menacing.
“I get that, okay? I get it. I’m not looking to hurt him or fuck with him.”
“You’re here to fix his house, then fix his house and stay out of his bed.”
Tanner rose to loom over Vance. “I know a guy in your place in life is pretty used to getting his way whenever he opens his mouth, but get this straight—whatever happens between me and Kilmer is his call.”
“Not yours?” Vance asked with a sneer.
Tanner held his own anger in check and marveled at the calm authority in his voice as he answered. “That isn’t how it works. It will always be his choice.”
He could feel all eyes on him as he whistled for the dog and led the animal out the back door, praying to God no one followed him.
16
AS KILMER stormed through the kitchen after Tanner, Vance opened his mouth to speak. Kilmer snarled at him to “shut the fuck up” and slammed out the back door. Tanner stood at the far end of the yard, arms crossed, watching the dog snuffle in the dirt by the compost heap.
Tanner looked like he was ready to hit something.
“Hey?” Kilmer winced when his greeting sounded so hesitant.
Tanner didn’t turn around.
“You okay?” Kilmer asked.
The dog looked up at him and bounded across the yard to bowl into him with a series of happy yips and growls. When Tanner turned to face Kilmer, his smile was strained.
“Hey,” Kilmer said again, a little more firmly this time. “You okay?”
Tanner shrugged. “I’m fine. Annoyed, but that isn’t your fault.”
“It isn’t Van’s either, you know.” Kilmer scratched the wiggling mutt as he crossed the patchy grass to where Tanner was standing. “He’s just being his usual overprotective self.”
