Dan the Adventurer, page 9
part #2 of Gold Girls and Glory Series
The elves screamed and cowered as Nadia raced past them, leapt into the air, and tore a gaping red hole in the throat of a slaver.
Another slaver jerked one way and then the other, struck almost simultaneously by arrows from both sides of the road.
A barrel-chested, red-bearded slaver charged in Dan’s direction, drawing back a heavy cudgel.
Dan thrust inside the slaver’s swing and ran his sword point through the man’s freckled upper arm. Dan powered forward, slammed into the red-haired man, and knocked the slaver from his feet.
As the man fell, Dan’s sword ripped free of the flabby biceps. Dan whipped the sword in a tight circle, switching grips, and jammed it down, skewering the slaver through the chest.
The red-haired man screamed and went still, staring up into the rain with open eyes as his mouth filled with blood.
Dan ripped his sword free and looked around for targets. His hood had fallen back. Heavy rain pounded into his face, making him squint, and ran down inside his collar, soaking him.
The slavers were dead, he realized with disappointment. Killing assholes had become his favorite hobby. Besides, he had to keep plugging away and earning experience points so that he could level up again.
Nadia gave her second kill one final shake before dropping him and jumping to her feet. Her breasts bounced fetchingly up and down, the short chestnut-colored fur flattened to their curves with the rain. Her green eyes locked on Dan, and a bloody smile spread across her muzzle.
“You know your girlfriend’s hot when you drool over her tits at a time like this,” Nadia said.
“His wife, you mean,” Holly said, stepping up beside them.
“Shut it, elf,” Nadia said.
The chained elves cowered, whimpering. The gnomes half-crouched, eyeing them warily. The dwarf stood, waiting stoically for whatever fate had in store for her now.
“We had better not stand in the open,” Dan said. “We don’t know who was firing from that side of the road.”
“You disappoint me, esteemed brother,” a female voice full of laughter called from the forest. “My perfect accuracy should have tipped you off.”
Dan laughed as Lily stepped from the woods. She had already unstrung her bow and lashed it to her back. She sauntered across the road, seemingly unbothered by the rain, despite the fact that she wasn’t wearing her purple cloak.
Lily walked over to the bald guy whom she’d killed, braced a boot against his thick neck, and yanked her arrow from his skull. After examining the arrow, she smiled and held it up for Dan to see. “Good as new,” she chimed. “That’s grey elf craftsmanship for you.”
Holly wrapped her younger sister in an embrace. They talked in Elvish for a few seconds, and then Holly turned to the ox, which still stood, staring into the distance. Beneath the fresh lash marks, its hide was matted with scars.
Holly smoothed a hand over the beast’s neck and spoke to it in soft, snuffling whispers, working her animal magic. As she spoke, a transformation came over the ox. The animal stood straighter and nuzzled Holly, dragging its thick, pale tongue up her arm.
Holly laughed and patted the beast softly. “Thank you,” she said. “You’ll be okay now.”
Lily crouched, pointing to the shackle patches sewn onto the dead men’s shoulders. “Roderick’s Raiders,” she said. “They’re a press gang for the Duke of Harrisburg. They raid the forests to fill his ranks. Then, after they’ve hauled off the strongest males to serve in the Duke’s army, they come back through to claim unprotected females as slaves.”
“Well, these assholes won’t be doing that anymore,” Dan said. “I’m glad we killed them.”
“Killed most of them,” Holly corrected him. “Two escaped into the woods.”
“Want me to go hunt them down?” Nadia asked.
Dan thought for a second. “Don’t bother,” he said. He didn’t doubt for a second that Nadia could take care of business, but in Willis’s campaigns, bad things happened offstage to friendly NPCs who left the group to go take care of some simple challenge. He wouldn’t risk sacrificing a woman he loved to serve as a plot point.
“Forget them,” he said. “Let’s wrap this up and get to the catacombs.”
Of course, he had no way of knowing then what a huge mistake he had just made.
15
Broken Elves and a Crazy Hobgoblin
They walked to the back of the wagon, where the red elves fell to their hands and knees, begging Nadia for mercy.
Fierce laughter rang out from above.
Remembering the hobgoblin, Dan looked up to see her grinning down at the groveling elves. She pointed at them and threw back her head with laughter, the undeniably feminine sound of it contrasting strangely with her harsh, red face, gleaming tusks, and muscular warrior’s physique.
He noticed then that her back, like the ox’s, was not only bleeding from recent whippings but also matted with the scarring of past lashings.
“Someone please tell these pitiful-ass elves that I’m not going to eat them,” Nadia said.
Dan crouched, pulled keys from the belt of a dead slaver, and spoke to the captives. “We’re not going to hurt you.”
The dwarf blinked, looking unconvinced and unconcerned.
The gnomes stood close to one another, eyeing him warily.
The four green elves also stood, looking frightened yet surly. Slightly shorter than grey elves, they were less curvy and more muscular, with skin the color of wet sand and hair the color of late-spring maple leaves. Their faces were cloudy with bruises.
They fought the slavers, Dan thought.
The seven red elves were gorgeous, despite their pitiful condition, rain-flattened hair, and mud-streaked faces. They had raven black hair, red skin, and huge eyes with bright red pupils that burned like flames in the gloom. They were tiny— shorter even than Lily—but their bodies were achingly curvy.
“Do not kill us, Master,” one of the red elves cried out to Dan. “Please spare us.”
Dan held up the keys and smiled. “Relax. We’re the good guys. Or at least, I’m the good guy, and these,” he said, nodding toward Nadia and the grey elf sisters, “are the good girls.”
A change had come over Holly. She stared down at the elves with her chin held high, her back straight, and her shoulders back. Her expression was aloof, almost icy.
The green elves avoided her purple eyes.
The red elves bowed low, thanking Holly and Lily for saving them.
“What about me?” Nadia said and barked incredulous laughter. “I killed two of those fuckers. Where’s my thanks?”
The elves mumbled thanks but refused to meet her eyes, drawing more laughter from the hobgoblin above.
Dan glanced back over his shoulder.
The hobgoblin’s bright yellow eyes burned into his as the corners of her mouth lifted. She pointed at the keys, slapped the cage lock, and spoke to him in a guttural language that he assumed was hobgoblin.
He raised his index finger, hoping that the gesture also meant “wait” in hobgoblin. He didn’t want to complicate things by flipping off the humanoid warrior woman.
Turning back to the red elves, he said, “Rise.”
They obeyed, their thin, rain-soaked clothes clinging to their incredibly curvaceous bodies. They really were small, probably only four and a half feet tall, with narrow waists and delicate wrists and ankles, but their arms and legs were toned and their figures were straight out of a teenage comic book fan’s wet dream. They were even bustier than the grey elves.
Enough of that, Dan thought, refocusing. Free these women and get back to business. The faster I reach the Pool of Dreams, the faster I’ll figure out Zeke’s dream riddle and what to do about it.
He told the captives to line up single file and hold out their wrists.
The dwarf muscled her way to the front of the line. She was middle-aged with curly brown hair, lifeless blue eyes, and the number 2073 tattooed into the hard line of her truculent jaw.
Dan sprung her wrists. Without a word, the dwarf trotted off into the woods.
You’re welcome, he thought, watching the strange woman disappear.
The gnomes thanked him in their high-pitched voices when he freed them and stepped aside.
Next came the green elves, still wary. When he freed them, they bowed and stepped aside, talking among themselves in Elvish that sounded less refined than the musical language of Holly’s people.
The red elves came last, thanking Dan again and again, calling him “brave master” and “courageous lord.”
Dan smirked at Holly, but she was still locked in her weird, aloof, regal mode. Lily was looting corpses.
Nadia, however, rolled her emerald eyes, a thing he’d never seen her do in fused form. “You’re eating this master shit up, aren’t you?”
Dan shrugged and laughed. “If the shoe fits.”
After he’d freed the last of the elves, the hobgoblin started shaking the bars of her cage.
“Settle down,” Dan said. “You’re next.”
“No, Master!” one of the red elves cried out. “The hobgoblin is a fierce warrior. She killed four of the slavers before they knocked her unconscious.”
“You can’t free her,” another red elf chimed in. “She will attack you!”
“Yes,” another red elf agreed. “Hob—”
“Enough!” Holly called sharply, her purple eyes flashing. “Hold your silly tongues.”
The red elves looked at their feet.
What the Hades? Dan thought.
Holly turned toward the caged warrior woman and spoke in the hobgoblin’s guttural language.
The pair went back and forth, Holly questioning the hobgoblin, who held her chin high and looked down at them with fearless eyes.
The hobgoblin’s voice grew more forceful. Then she thumped her breasts—which were actually quite nice, Dan now realized—with a forearm.
Holly turned back to Dan. “Her name is Ula-Una-Oon-Bok, Third Daughter of Bok the Bold, war maiden of the Liver Eaters, and she wants you to free her.” The hint of a smile lifted one corner of Holly’s mouth. “Ula also says that these elves are nervous idiots, afraid of their own shadows.”
“Girlfriend has a point,” Nadia said.
“Tell Ula-Una-Whatever that I’ll free her,” Dan said, “but if she attacks us, we’ll waste her.”
“No need to threaten her, husband,” Holly said. “Ula is a warrior, not a psychopath. Hobgoblins lead martial lives, but they are not chaotic killing machines.”
“All right, then,” Dan said, climbing into the wagon and stepping over the leg of the man that the hobgoblin had strangled to death.
The red elves chittered frantic warnings until Holly hushed them with a disapproving gaze.
Ula grinned as Dan approached, showing him her tusks. She was as tall as he was, and she held his gaze with intense and intelligent yellow eyes.
In juxtaposition to the throbbing femininity of the red elves, Ula looked harsh and fearsome, but she was vibrantly alive, oozed confidence, and radiated a strange, inhuman sexuality.
Dan slid the thick key into the slot and turned it, unlocking the cage door with a muffled clack.
Ula gave him a nod and strode to the front of the wagon, where she pulled aside a tarp pooled with rainwater and retrieved a massive, double-bladed battle ax with pointed pommel.
Dan hopped down off the wagon.
He was confused to see all of the red elves still standing there, blinking up at him with their big, soulful eyes. Strands of wet hair clung to their foreheads, and rain drained down their firm-looking, red cleavage.
The gnomes still lingered, too, looking cautious yet hopeful.
Ula hopped off the wagon beside Dan and sneered at the red elves, who let out a collective shriek.
Ula threw back her head with another burst of curiously girlish laughter and leaned back against the wagon, holding her axe across her body and looking incredibly amused.
After the red elves had settled, Dan said, “That’s it. You’re free. Go home.”
One of the red elves stepped forward with pleading eyes—her red irises were flecked with gold, he noticed—and fell to her knees before him.
“Please, Master,” she begged, looking up at him with huge, desperate eyes and gripping his thighs with her small hands. “Please don’t leave us in the wilderness to die.”
“Huh?” Dan said. “You’re elves. Don’t you live in the woods?”
“Our flesh is sweet, Master,” the red elf pleaded. “Monsters would devour us.”
The other red elves nodded in agreement, looking on with terrified eyes.
Meanwhile, the little elf before him rubbed her hands up and down his thighs. Staring down at her beautiful face and ample cleavage, he felt something dark stir within himself.
These red elves were small, but they weren’t children. Not at all.
“Master, please,” she begged. “Don’t abandon us. We’ll do anything.”
“They’re telling the truth,” Lily said. “They wouldn’t last a night in this forest.”
Dan groaned. He didn’t have time for this bullshit. The day was slipping away. He needed to investigate the catacombs before darkness fell.
“You can have the wagon,” he told them. “Just stay inside and hurry straight home, and I’m sure everything will be fine.”
“Master,” the red elf with gold in her eyes said, “you are very kind to offer the wagon, but the wagon is slow, and predators are fast. Please, take us with you.”
“Believe me,” Dan said, “if you’re afraid of predators, you don’t want to go where we’re going.”
The red elves shuddered. Others crawled forward to clutch at his legs. “Don’t abandon us, Master!”
What a mess, Dan thought, surveying the scene. Rain and mud and bodies everywhere. And now this crew of helpless elves. He didn’t have time for any of it, but he couldn’t just let them die.
Turning to Holly and Nadia, he said, “What if we take them to the crevasse and have them wait outside while we take care of business?”
Holly shook her head. “We don’t know how long it will take underground, and their sweet blood would just stir up trouble.”
“You guys are exploring the crevasse?” Lily asked.
“Dan needs to visit the Pool of Dreams,” Holly said.
“Take me with you,” Lily said. “I’ve always wanted to see the catacombs. Besides, I know this country better than anyone. I’ll help you return these people to their villages.”
The red elves brightened instantly, clamoring with hopeful whispers.
“Return them to their villages?” Dan said.
“There’s no other way,” Nadia said. “You won’t leave them here to die, and we can’t take them to the crevasse, so we have to deliver them.”
Dan groaned, then asked the red elf with flecks of gold in her eyes, “Where do you live?”
“Fire Ridge, Master,” the red elf said.
“How far away is that?” Dan asked.
“I’m not certain, Master,” the red elf said. She looked to the other red elves, who all seemed clueless, before turning back to him. “It’s been a difficult time, Master. The slavers took us while we were harvesting nuts in the forest. That was several days ago. The slavers moved slowly, stopping to capture others.”
“If we move with a purpose, we can reach Fire Ridge in two days,” Lily said.
“Two days there and two days back, then?” Dan said. “We can’t wait that long.”
“The fortress of Fire Ridge would thank you for saving us,” the red elf said.
Lily snorted. “Some fortress,” she said. “You guys let that place fall apart.”
If the red elf heard Lily, she didn’t show it. Instead, she kept her big eyes trained on Dan. “Master, my mother is the matriarch.”
“Look,” Dan said, “I’m sorry, but—”
“Husband,” Holly said sharply. “Return the red elves to Fire Ridge.”
Dan eyed her with confusion. She had been so aloof toward the red elves. Now she was suggesting that he derail his plan, potentially putting Zeke and themselves in danger, in order to help a pack of elves about which she clearly didn’t give a shit.
“We have to get to the Pool of Dreams,” he reminded her. “You know—”
“Husband,” Holly said, and her voice suddenly had an edge. “Trust me.”
He didn’t understand what was happening here, but he understood her purple eyes well enough. She had a reason for her sudden change of heart, and he needed to play along.
“All right,” he said. “We’ll escort them back to Fire Ridge.”
The red elves squealed with delight and bowed down before Dan, lavishing him with another wave of praise and thanks.
Shit, he thought, smiling uncomfortably at the fawning elves, this is going to be a huge pain in the ass.
“Let’s go,” Nadia said. “If I have to stand here listening to these pebble-brained bimbos worship you, I’m going to barf.”
“Enough,” Dan told the red elves. “We need to get moving. And you,” he said, addressing the green elves and gnomes, “I suppose you need help, too?”
They did. Delivering them would add another day, maybe two. They were looking at a week’s delay before they would be able to explore the catacombs.
Noticing Ula standing there, looking fierce as a bloody-faced lioness with her double-headed battle ax, he said, “Why are you still here? You don’t need our protection.”
The hobgoblin grunted in her ugly language, thumped her chest, and slammed the pointed pommel of her ax into the muddy road.
“She wants to stay with you,” Holly said. “You freed her, so she is in your debt.”
“Huh?” Dan said. Delivering the others was already going to be a tremendous pain in the ass. Having a snarling hobgoblin along would only make things harder. “Tell her not to worry about it.”
Holly spoke to Ula.
Ula scowled and squared her shoulders, and her gaze grew even fiercer. She ranted for several seconds, clearly angry, and slammed her battle ax once more into the ground.
“Ula assumes that you’re refusing her because you think that she’s weak. She’s offering to fight any one of us to prove her worth.”
