Succubus Lord 6, page 21
part #6 of Succubus Lord Series
“But see?” Plato argued heatedly. “That’s exactly why I think it’s in the arcade. Lucifer may be given a bad rap by the forces of the Divine, but he is far from stupid. Why would he hide such an important architechtural feature of Hell in the most obvious place?”
“Probably because it’s guarded by swarms of his minions?” Todd argued. “Duh. It’ll be like a full-on dungeon crawler mission, guys!”
“Lucifer keeps almost none of his forces in the First Circle,” Plato sighed. “It’s a relatively peaceful place, save for, well, you know. Either way, I’m sure it’s at the arcade. It has to be.”
“You’re not denying me a dungeon crawling adventure, beard-bro,” Todd muttered angrily and pulled himself up onto a chair.
The imp and Plato were now at eye level, looking angrily into each others eyes and waiting for the other one to break.
“Guys, guys,” I chuckled awkwardly and stepped in between the two. “There’s no need to fight. You’re both bringing up valid points.”
“So you do believe me?” Todd asked happily. “Ha! In your face, planet boy!”
“Plato, not Pluto,” the philosopher sighed and put his hand over his face. “We’ve been over this a million times.”
The imp began to break out into a celebratory dance reminiscent of an Irish Jig, but I threw up a hand to stop him just before he got too into it. “Todd,” I explained, “we’re gonna follow Plato’s advice on this one.”
Todd instantly halted his dance, and his mouth fell agape in shock. “You-- but I--” he uttered. “I thought we were besties, bro?”
“We are, we are,” I promised the imp, “but Plato is one of the most brilliant minds in the history of the world, and he knows the First Circle better than any of us. I trust his intuition on this one.”
Todd hung his head in shame. “Fine,” he sighed. “Let’s go check out the arcade. They’d better at least have Pac-Man, bro.”
My group grabbed the few things we’d brought with us, and then we followed Plato out of the cave and back toward the city of Limbo. We walked for thirty minutes or so, until we were back on the west side of the metropolitan area. Finally, the bearded philosopher led us to our supposedly final destination, a large, three-story mall that read The Nine Circles on its front.
“That’s the most original name they could come up with?” Todd laughed. “I could come up with something more clever in my sleep, bro.”
“Really?” I asked with a raised eyebrow. “Like what?”
“I, uh--” Todd rapped his claws against his chin. “I dunno. Give me a minute or two. I haven’t smoked a joint in, like, four hours, so my brain is a little murky.”
“Did somebody say they needed a joint?” a hippy-looking man said as he stumbled up to our group. “I got the hook-up for you right here, man.”
The mysterious stranger held out a freshly-rolled doobie in his hand and offered it to Todd. The imp’s eyes lit up with joy as a toothy grin spread across his face, and he snatched up the herb-filled tube in his tiny mitts.
“I don’t know who you are, bro,” Todd sighed and called forth red Hellfire into his hand, “but you’re a lifesaver.”
“Don’t mention it, duderino,” the mall hippy exclaimed as he walked away.
Todd lit the end of the joint, placed it in his mouth, and took a deep breath. Suddenly, his eyes went wide, and he began to cough violently as smoke billowed from his nostrils. The imp’s hacking fit went on for a minute or two until he was finally able to gulp in air comfortably.
“What’s the matter?” I asked. “Did that asshole poison you?”
“Was it a cruel prank?” Sia added. “Is there rotten fish in the joint or something like that?”
“W--worse,” Todd gasped and tossed the joint away at lightning-fast speed. “It’s … it’s that shit that costs a dollar an ounce. What kind of cruel fate is this?”
“Did you really think you were going to get good cannabis in the First Circle of Hell?” Plato asked coyly.
“Of course not,” Todd shuddered. “But this shit? This shit … ”
The five of us walked into the mall, and I instantly felt like I had been transported back to my youth. The entire place felt like it had been ripped straight out of an eighties movie. Out-of-date stores lined each side of the interior, broken up every now and again by a restaurant that looked barren and had a “closed” sign above its counter.
“This place looks like a ghost town,” I observed as we walked through the building. “I don’t see any other shoppers in sight.”
“That’s the way it’s meant to be, I’m afraid,” Plato sighed. “There are all these shops and restaurants that the residents of the city want, but they’re always closed. Not to mention, there is no form of currency here in Hell, so everything either has to be free or done with the barter system. As you can imagine, business owners down here don’t really care for either, so they mostly just leave their stores closed and only open them for people who have an appointment.”
“That fucking blows,” I whistled. “At least you can still grab a Cinnabon at the dying malls up on Earth.”
We walked all the way to the north end of the mall until we hit a small section that had an “arcade” marquee hanging on for dear life from a rope that looked like it was about to snap. There were stains all over the “galaxy” themed carpet, and the whole place smelled like somebody’s bad gas. The only saving grace was the fact that the arcade was vibrant with bright colors and the sound of old-school gaming sounds.
“And I thought Chuck E. Cheese was bad,” Todd joked. “Oof. I’d take little kid vomit over this shit any day.”
“So, I’ll bite,” Cupi said as she looked around at the borderline depressing area. “What makes you think the portal to the Second Circle is in here?”
“Two reasons,” Plato explained. “First, this is one of the biggest power sources in the city, all controlled by Asmodeus’ electric Hellfire of love. The power levels in this building are so far off the chart it would make for the perfect disguise to hide an interdimensional portal. The second reason is Lucifer likes to be clever with his puzzles. Charon’s coin is needed to travel through the dimensions--”
“And what better place to use a dimension-hopping coin than an arcade!” I clapped my hands together as it dawned on me. “Now the only question is which machine do we use it on?”
“Bro, the answer is obvious,” Todd spoke up. “It’s gotta be something gory like House of the Dead or Splatterhouse.”
“That would be too obvious,” Sia argued. “Lucifer is old school. He’d probably put it in something like Wizards and Warriors or Ghosts ‘n Goblins.”
“It’s going to be the one we least expect,” Plato threw in his two cents. “Why don’t we try Donkey Kong?”
As my four friends bickered, my eyes were drawn to a flashing white strobe light in the back of the room. The light flickered, beckoning me to approach like a lighthouse in the darkness. Or a bug lamp, if it was a trap. It all depended on the source of the light. I walked back to find a small, blue-and-purple arcade machine with vector graphics flashing across the screen.
“Holy shit … ” I muttered. “Guys! Get over here! I think I found the one we’re looking for.”
The top of the arcade read Polybius.
“What is it, Jakey?” Todd asked as the group approached. “Did you--oh shit, I thought that thing was an urban legend?”
“What’s so special about this one?” Cupi asked curiously. “It looks like any other arcade machine to me.”
“Polybius was an arcade game back in the day that allegedly was created by the U.S. government,” I explained as I fumbled in my pocket for Charon’s coin. “Supposedly the people who played it experienced all sorts of deteriorated mental states and psychosis, and the machines were snatched up by paranormal investigators when all was said and done. Of course, it’s all just a myth, and the game itself never actually existed.”
“That’s what they want you to believe, bro,” Todd said with a nod. “It’s totally a cover-up.”
“Which is why I think this is the one,” I reiterated. “If Lucifer really wanted to be clever and cheeky, what better machine to put a portal to the Second Circle in than a conspiracy-laden video game that may or may not have existed on Earth?”
“I know next to nothing about video games,” Plato admitted. “As you probably already knew, they weren’t exactly from my time. I’ll trust you on this, Jacob.”
“What happens if I’m wrong?” I asked the philosopher.
Plato’s eyes narrowed. “You aren’t,” he reassured.
I took a deep breath, removed Charon’s coin from my pocket, and enchanted it with purple Hellfire. Then, I shoved the tiny trinket into the coin slot, where it fell through the machine with a mechanical “thunk.” The screen of Polybius sprang to life with a white vector space ship and the game’s logo.
“Maybe you gotta do the Contra Code, bro,” Todd suggested.
I considered the imp’s request for a moment, but then my thoughts were cut off when the entire arcade machine was engulfed in violet Hellfire. The LCD screen morphed into a swirling nebula of purple, and a small breeze swept through the arcade and chilled me to the bone.
This was the Porta in Circuli secundi. AKA the portal that would take us into the Second Circle.
Charon’s glowing coin popped out of the return chute on the machine, and I snatched it up before I stepped toward the portal.
Sia’s slender hand touched my shoulder delicately. “This is it, Jacob,” she explained. “The Second Circle is much more treacherous than the First.”
I grabbed the madame’s hand and held it firmly in my grasp. “We’ll get through it as a team,” I explained. “There’s nothing in this universe that can bring us down.”
The redhead gave me a determined nod and turned to face the portal. She took off toward the machine, sprang into the air, and disappeared into the glowing violet Hellfire. Todd was next, followed by Cupi. As I approached the portal, I looked back at Plato.
“Aren’t you coming along?” I asked the philosopher. “This whole thing was to get you out of here.”
“No, son,” the bearded man said with a shake of his head. “It was to show me there was something else out there. That’s the whole point of The Cave, isn’t it? Human beings want to know the truth, but even when they discover it, they are fine staying right where they are, in their own reality. This is my reality, Jacob.”
“Well, that is one interpretation … ” I protested, but I was quickly cut off with a wave of the philosopher’s hand.
“One interpretation?” he guffawed. “I wrote the damn thing! Now go, Jacob. You’ve done far more for me than I ever could have hoped for.”
“Thanks, Plato,” I acknowledged. “I’ll be sure to tell everyone that you’re ten times cooler than what you read in History class.”
I turned around, started to run toward the portal, and then propelled myself headfirst into the interdimensional doorway. My body was weightless, and my brain felt like it was vibrating in my skull. There was blackness for a moment or two, and then I felt myself smash violently into a rocky surface. I pulled myself to my feet and saw the area around us was barren and rocky, like the surface of a mountain, and I could hear the high winds howling through the sky.
Cupi, Sia, and Todd were already on their feet, surveying their surroundings.
“Welcome to the Second Circle,” Sia sighed. “The Circle of Lust.”
Chapter 15
“Wait a minute,” Todd said as he looked around curiously. “This is supposed to be the circle of lust? I figured it’d be packed to the brim with strip clubs,hookers, adult toy stores, and all that shit.”
“It can be,” Sia said coyly. “If that is what you so desire.”
“Ah, so we’re doing the Mirror of Erised thing here,” the imp observed. “Cool beans. Just don’t let the author of that book know Lucifer stole the idea from her.”
“Or maybe she stole it from him?” I suggested jokingly, and the imp made a “mind blown” gesture with his hands. “This makes no sense, though. It’s basically a barren landscape.”
“There’s a lot of that in Hell, Jacob,” Cupi giggled playfully. “You get used to it. And it’s not completely barren. See those people over there?”
Off in the distance there was a small cluster of people formed into a loose clump, all of them darting in different directions with their hands extended out in front of them. I couldn’t see their faces from this far away, but I could tell by their body language they were chasing something rather than running.
“What are they running after?” I asked curiously. “There’s nothing there but jagged rocks and--”
Before anyone could answer my question, one of the runners fell down and smashed hard into the stony ground in front of him. His scream of pain echoed through the air, drowning out even the roaring wind that was constantly ringing in our ears. I saw a glimpse of white jutting out from his leg, and I cringed when I realized it was probably his femur. Despite the horrific pain he must have been feeling, the man wobbled back to his feet and started to lumber off toward his invisible target once more.
“They’re chasing the things they wanted most in their Earthly lives,” Sia explained. “The catch is they will never actually be fast enough to grab them. In fact, they will spend all of eternity trying and injure themselves gruesomely in the process.”
“Fuck,” I muttered in shock. “It really did go from one to one-hundred between the First and Second Circles.”
“Thankfully, we know all about this trick,” Cupi said somewhat cockily. “We won’t fall for such treachery.”
“Whhhhooooaaaa,” Todd said out of the blue. “Is that … is that … it is! A first-edition copy of Bob Marley and the Wailers’ The Birth of a Legend! I’ve been looking for that my whole life, bro.”
“Todd,” I tried to talk the imp down, “it’s just a trick. It wants you to follow it so you can hurt yourself.”
“But what if it’s not?” Todd asked hopefully. “If this is a real copy of that album, I’m probably not gonna get another shot at this as long as I live.”
“If you go after it, you won’t live,” I warned my friend.
“Todd, it’s not real,” Sia jumped in. “It’s all part of the cruel game the Second Circle plays on its victims.”
Todd clenched his fists, slammed his lips shut, and let out a large huff of air as he tried to resist. He stood there for a moment, heaving in anticipation, and then he finally sighed loudly.
“Fuck it,” he mused. “If this is how the Toddster goes, this is how he goes!”
The imp laughed maniacally as he dashed after the invisible album.
“Todd, wait--” I started to run after him, but Sia held out her arm and cut me off.
“It’s too dangerous,” she explained. “If he hurts himself, I can always use my healing powers to fix him up.”
“Uh, Sia?” Cupi asked worriedly. “Are you sure you’re talking to the real Jacob?”
The redhead turned back to her sister and gave her a curious glance. “Whatever do you mean, Cupiditas?” she questioned. “Jacob is right here.”
“But if that’s Jacob, then who is that guy over there?” the blonde succubus asked as she pointed to a blank space beside where I was standing. “And why is he rubbing the other Jacob’s shoulder seductively?”
“Jesus,” I grumbled and put my head in my hand. “Her biggest desire in life is to have two of me at the same time.”
Cupi blushed a tad and shrugged. “It’s a reasonable goal, wouldn’t you say, Superbia?” she giggled.
Sia’s violet eyes darted over behind me, and she went rigid as her irises grew larger than life. “Well helloooooo,” she cooed.
“Oh no,” I groaned. “What do you see, Sia?”
“I see you, Jacob.” The redhead bit her lip. “Only you’re wearing a two-piece navy suit and a crimson-red tie, and you have a pair of wide-framed glasses over your eyes. And a briefcase! You have a giant briefcase that looks like it’s filled with all sorts of important documents.”
“I see,” I sighed. “Prim and proper, business-professional Jacob. Is that really what you want from me?”
“I--of course not,” Sia lied obviously. “I love you just the way you are. Untucked shirt, jeans, and all.”
“Now see?” I laughed and pointed at the succubus. “The way you say that makes it sound like it’s a bad thing.”
“No, no,” the madame played it coy. “It’s only a fantasy, that’s all. Nothing more, nothing less.”
Cupi strutted over toward the spot where my alleged doppelganger had been standing, and then she frowned when a gust of wind blew by and tussled her blonde hair. My heart dropped into my stomach when I realized what was happening next, and the blonde succubus began to run.
“Cupi, it’s an illusion!” I exclaimed, but it was no use.
Cupiditas was headed directly toward the edge of a massive cliff, and I had to act fast if I wanted to keep her alive. I reached down, pressed the image of the black angel wings on my skin, and recalled the succubus back to Earth. White ectoplasmic substance sprang forth from my arm, shot across the landscape like a lightning bolt, and engulfed the running woman. She was lifted into the air and disappeared in a flash of brilliant white light.
“Whew,” I sighed. “That was close. Which of your sisters do you think can actually handle this place?”
“Definitely not Tris,” Sia retorted instantly. “Nor could Gula. They are quite literally the Sisters of Sloth and Gluttony, and they have enough problems resisting temptations up on Earth Realm.”
“Liby?” I suggested.
“No!” Sia snapped uncharacteristically. “Libidine is one of our strongest members, but she is far too trusting and gullible. She would fall for this illusion the second she set foot on the ground.”
“Then that just leaves Ira.” I nodded. “Think she can handle it?”
“I do not know,” the madame admitted, “but she is a politician, and she has self-healing powers. She might be the most helpful in this scenario.”
