Witch is How Life Changed Forever, page 11
part #36 of Witch P.I. Mystery Series
“There are some nice shoes in there,” she said. “I’ve only worn them once because they’re too narrow.”
She was just about to close the door when I said, “Just a minute. I think there may have been a mistake.”
“You do take shoes, don’t you? The leaflet said you accepted clothes and shoes.”
“I think you must have mistaken me for someone else. I’m not here to collect this.”
“Aren’t you from Washbridge Senior Support?”
“No, sorry.”
“I do beg your pardon.” She took the bag back. “Who are you, then?”
“My name’s Jill Maxwell. I’m here to see Mr Finley McAdams.”
“Are you the private investigator lady?”
“That’s me.”
“I do apologise for the confusion. I’m Barbara. Finley is my husband. You’d better come in.”
I stepped inside, onto a thick pile carpet that looked and smelled brand new. “Would you like me to take off my shoes?” I offered.
“No, dear, that won’t be necessary. Finley is out the back; in the shed. He spends more time in there than he does in the house. Not that I’m complaining because it allows me to watch my TV in peace.”
She led me through to the kitchen, opened the back door and pointed to the shed, which was halfway down the garden.
As I neared the shed, I heard a strange noise coming from inside. Mr McAdams was obviously working on something. I knocked on the door, but he didn’t hear me. I tried again with the same result, so I opened the door slowly and stepped inside.
Mr McAdams was wearing a safety visor, and he had a small electric saw in his hand. He must have seen the door open because he switched off the power tool and nodded a greeting.
“Hello, young lady. Are you the private investigator?”
“That’s right. Jill Maxwell.”
“I’m awfully sorry I wasn’t in the house to greet you. I completely lost track of time. I’ve been so very busy.”
“No problem.”
“Do you mind if we talk in here? If we go into the house, I’ll have to get changed because the wife doesn’t appreciate me wandering around in there with my overalls on.”
“In here will be fine.”
“You said your name was Jill, didn’t you?”
“That’s right. Jill Maxwell.”
“Tell me, Jill, do you have any leads yet?”
“Not yet, but then so far, I’ve only spoken to Lori and Hannah.”
“How can I be of assistance?”
“Perhaps you could start by talking me through the events of the last meeting of the art appreciation society?”
“Yes, of course.”
The story he told pretty much matched the one I’d heard from Hannah Westbrook: how they’d met in Lori’s dining room, chatted for a while, and then Lori had gone through to the kitchen to make drinks.
“That’s when the bees appeared,” he said. “And we had to evacuate the apartment.”
“Did you see how the bees got in, Mr McAdams?”
“No, but I assume they must have come in through the patio door. One minute they weren’t there, and the next, we were overrun with them. I was lucky to get out without being stung. I believe poor Hannah took one on the way out.”
“She did, yes. Tell me, Mr McAdams, what do you think of the painting that was stolen?”
“It’s a nice piece; there’s no doubt about that, but to be perfectly honest with you, I think Lori paid well over the odds for it. I don’t know where she got that kind of money from because she’s always pleading poverty to me.”
“Did you notice anything suspicious on your way into the building that day?”
“Nothing at all, but then it’s always very quiet there.”
“Can you think of anyone who might have taken the painting?”
“Not really. I mean, it’s not like it’s a Turner or anything. I did have one thought, but I probably should keep it to myself.”
“Please tell me. It might help.”
“Do you promise it will stay between us?”
“Of course.”
“My first thought when I heard the painting had gone missing was that Lori must have overstretched herself financially, and decided to go after the insurance money.”
“Are you suggesting that she might have staged the theft?”
“Yes. No. Probably not. That’s just the first thing that popped into my head. Take no notice of me. What do I know?”
When we’d finished our little chat, he led me back to the house where his wife was waiting to meet me. She walked me through the house and saw me out.
“Was Finley able to assist you, dear?”
“Yes, he was very helpful.”
“I don’t really know what he sees in those meetings. I sometimes think he only goes there for the other ladies.”
I was determined not to go home without having first renewed my subscription for the spell book.
I magicked myself over to the Candlefield town hall in plenty of time to ensure that I didn’t fall foul of the three-thirty deadline. Once again, the same slim young man with the strange quiff was behind the counter. And, once again, he clearly didn’t remember me.
“How can I help you, madam?”
“I’d like to renew the subscription for my spell book. I inadvertently allowed it to lapse a few months ago.”
“Certainly, madam. We’ll just need to complete this form. Your name, please?”
“Jill Maxwell.”
I gave him the registration number of the book and handed over the cash.
“That’s everything I need. I’ll just update our records.” He tapped away on the keyboard for a few minutes. “All done. Everything’s up to date.”
“Great. Does that mean I’ll be able to update my spell book when I get back home?”
“You will. Just follow the instructions on the back page and it should update immediately.”
“Excellent. Thank you very much.”
Ike and Jack would be delighted that I’d finally managed to renew my subscription. As soon as I got home, I’d update the book, find the spell I needed, and put Ike out of his misery. He’d be able to go home to his wife, and Jack and I would be able to enjoy our evening meal without having to share the table with the undead.
***
As soon as I walked through the door, Ike came running downstairs.
“Jill, please tell me you managed to renew your subscription.”
“I certainly did. I’m just about to go and update the spell book.”
“That’s great news. I can’t wait to get back home to the missus.”
“Why don’t you go upstairs and—err—freshen up? I’ll do the update then come and find you.”
“Will do, Jill.” He shot back up the stairs.
I went through to the lounge, took out the spell book, and followed the instructions to perform the update. This time, thankfully, it processed without a hitch. After a few moments, a message appeared at the bottom of the page, to confirm that the book was now up to date. I consulted the index for the spell I needed to reverse Ike’s condition. For one horrible moment, I thought it wasn’t there because there was nothing listed under ‘Z’. Then I spotted it under ‘P’ with the catchy title of Pseudo Zombie. If I’d had more time, I would have submitted a suggestion that they cross-reference it under ‘Z’ as Zombie, Pseudo, but I had more important matters to attend to.
I flicked to the page where it was supposed to be listed, but all I found was a heading; there were no detailed instructions on how to perform the spell. Instead, there was just a short note, which said that particular spell was part of the premium package.
Premium package? What premium package? I’d never seen any mention of that in the spell book before.
I checked the front of the book and found a note confirming that in this latest edition, certain spells were now available only to those who had paid for the premium package upgrade. And when I read on, my heart sank.
To upgrade to the premium package, please make the additional payment at the subscriptions office in Candlefield town hall, which is open Monday to Friday, from 9:30 to 3:30.
Oh, bum! This nightmare was never-ending.
I went through to the hallway, and shouted, “Ike, you’d better come down here. I’m afraid I’ve got some bad news for you.”
***
I was in the kitchen when Jack arrived home from work.
“Has Ike gone?” he said. “Do we have the house to ourselves now?”
“No. He’s still upstairs in the spare bedroom.”
“What? Don’t tell me you forgot to go to the subscriptions office, Jill.”
“No, I didn’t forget.”
“Did you forget to take the money with you?”
“No, I didn’t forget that either.”
“How come you still can’t reverse the spell, then?”
“Because apparently, in the latest edition of the book there are now two types of spells: standard and premium. Unless you pay extra for the premium package, you can’t access the premium ones.”
“And don’t tell me. The spell you need is one of the premium ones?”
“Correct. I’ll have to go back to the subscriptions office on Monday, to pay for the premium package.”
“What I don’t understand is why, if you’re the most powerful witch in Candlefield, you can’t come up with the spell yourself?”
“Because, Jack, it isn’t as simple as all that. I can conjure up most spells, but this one is very unusual. Turning someone into a pseudo-zombie is not something that has ever been done before and it’s very tricky. I wouldn’t know where to begin. I asked Grandma, and even she didn’t have a clue how to do it. We’re just going to have to wait until I’ve purchased the premium package on Monday. Until then, we’re stuck with Ike.”
I’d taken Ike’s dinner up to the spare bedroom. He was quite understanding when I’d explained that we’d prefer to eat alone, and that it was nothing personal. Back downstairs, Jack and I were enjoying the roast chicken dinner that he’d prepared.
“By the way, I called in at the corner shop on the way home,” he said.
“Did you see the giant fan he’s had installed?”
“I did. It looks like a wind tunnel behind that screen. But, to be honest, that was the least of Little Jack’s problems.”
“How come?”
“When I left, he had a queue of irate customers. They’d all returned their baskets, but they hadn’t been refunded their pound.”
Chapter 14
It was Saturday morning and, even though it was still freezing outside, Jack was full of the joys of spring.
“Today is going to be fantastic Jill,” he gushed.
“Hmm, for you maybe. You get to go go-karting while I’m stuck in the house with Ike.”
“Don’t be so melodramatic. You don’t have to stay in. You can do whatever you like. And, don’t forget we’ve got the fancy dress party to look forward to, tonight.”
“Whoop-di-doo. It just gets better and better.”
“Come on, Jill, you know you’ll enjoy it when you get there.”
“Couldn’t we just give it a miss? We could stay in tonight.”
“And do what? Watch TV?”
“It wasn’t TV I had in mind.” I flashed him my super-sexy smile.
“With Ike in the next room? I don’t think so. Anyway, we promised we’d go to the fancy dress do, and as the band’s star soloist, everyone will expect you to be there. Are you still planning on wearing the witch’s outfit?”
“Yeah. I don’t see the point in spending good money to hire a costume when I can wear that for nothing. I managed to get hold of one of the green ones.”
“Why don’t you go and put it on now? You know how sexy I think you look in those.”
“I’d love to, but like you just said, Ike’s upstairs.”
“Spoilsport.”
“You’re the spoilsport. You won’t even tell me what your costume is.”
“I want it to be a surprise.”
“It had better be good after all this build up. Has Ike been downstairs yet?”
“Yeah, he came down earlier to get some corn flakes. I was eating my muesli at the time, and I thought for a horrible moment that he was going to join me, but he took his breakfast upstairs.”
“What time is Peter coming?”
“He should be here any minute now. I’d better go and look out for him.” Jack walked through to the lounge and I followed. “The weather is getting worse out there.” He pointed. “Look, the cars are frozen over. It should never be as cold as that at this time of year.”
“I told you why that is. It’s the ice nymphs.”
“What did they do to make it so cold?”
“I don’t know. The only reason I know they’re responsible is because Daze told me.”
“Pete’s here.” Jack gave me a quick peck on the lips and then hurried out of the door.
Waiting for him in the car were Peter and Mikey who both gave me a wave. As soon as Jack had joined them, they drove away.
What was I going to do with myself all day? Before I could even begin to think about it, I needed coffee to wake me up. I’d just switched on the kettle when I heard the familiar uneven clomping sound on the stairs; Ike was on his way down.
He looked even worse than he had the day before.
“Morning, Jill,” he said.
“Morning. You’re looking rough today, Ike.”
“Is that supposed to be a joke?”
“No, sorry. I just meant—err—never mind. Would you like a coffee?”
“Yes, please.”
We were both seated at the kitchen table when I heard the door open. Had Jack forgotten something?
“It’s only me,” Kathy shouted.
Oh bum!
“Ike, stay here and don’t make a sound.”
I hurried out of the kitchen, closing the door behind me.
“Hi there,” I said, trying not to freak out at the thought of the pseudo-zombie in my kitchen. “I wasn’t expecting to see you today. I told Jack I thought you’d be working.”
“May said she could manage the shop by herself just for one day.”
“What about Lizzie? Where is she?”
“Gone to a friend’s house for the day. The girl’s mother is going to take them to the cinema this afternoon, so I thought you and I might do something.”
“What did you have in mind? Do you want to go into Washbridge and take a look around the shops?”
“No, I have a much better idea.”
Kathy shared her idea with me, and although it definitely wasn’t what I’d been expecting, I did like the sound of it.
“Sure, I’d be up for that.”
“Great! But I need a drink first.”
Before I could stop her, Kathy had walked through to the kitchen.
Oh bum! How would I explain away the undead seated at the table?
“Did you know I was coming?” Kathy shouted.
“No. I told you; I thought you were working.”
“So, how come there are two cups of coffee on the table?”
“Err, I was feeling really thirsty, so I made myself two cups.”
“You are seriously weird, Jill. Is it okay if I have one of these?”
“Sure.” I joined her at the kitchen table. There was no sign of Ike, and I couldn’t figure out where he’d gone.
“It’s cold in here,” Kathy said. “Do you mind if I shut the window?”
“Go ahead.” It was only then that I realised that Ike must have climbed out into the back garden and been unable to shut the window properly from the outside. Poor thing. He had to be freezing out there. If he wasn’t careful, even more bits of him would drop off.
***
I’m not sure which one of them was more surprised to see us: Jack and Peter were both standing there, open-mouthed. Mikey was too busy trying on his crash helmet to even notice us.
“What are you two doing here?” Peter asked.
“We thought we’d show you boys how it’s done,” Kathy said.
“In your dreams.” Peter laughed.
“Did you know you were going to come here, Jill?” Jack said.
“No, honestly. I was just having a cup of coffee when Kathy turned up. It was her idea.”
“You do realise that these are not pedal-karts, don’t you?” Peter said. “They have real engines.”
“Don’t be so patronising, Pete,” Kathy snapped. “Jill and I can take you two, any day of the week.”
Jack and Peter exchanged a look.
“That sounds like a challenge to me,” Jack said.
“It certainly does.” Peter turned to us. “If you two are so confident, why don’t we make it a competition, men versus women?”
“What about Mikey?” Kathy said.
“He’ll be neutral. For the purposes of the competition, it’ll be Jack and me versus you and Jill. Whoever comes in first between the four of us takes the race. Agreed?”
“Fine by us,” Kathy said. “This is going to be easy money.”
“Who mentioned money?” Jack said.
“We should have a small wager to make it interesting.” Kathy was surprisingly confident. “What do you reckon, Jill?”
“Definitely. Why don’t we say whichever team loses has to pay for everything today?”
“You’re on.” Peter clearly liked the idea.
“What about you, Jack?” I said. “Are you up for it?”
“Definitely. Bring it on!”
While Peter, Jack, and Mikey were choosing their karts, Kathy and I went to the counter. The geeky, spotty young man on duty, gave us each some leathers to go over our own clothes, and a crash helmet.
“These smell.” I held the leathers at arm’s length. “Don’t you have any newer ones?”
“Sorry, lady. All of them are like that. It’s an adrenaline-packed sport.”
“Come on, Jill. Hurry up.” Kathy had already put on her leathers. “We don’t want to miss the first race.”
