Love Inspired April 2021--Box Set 1 of 2, page 21
“You went back for my stuff?” she whispered, raising her eyes to his. Realization changed her demeanor. She brought a hand to her head and grimaced. “My current hairstyle is courtesy of breast cancer. I’m still guessing whether my hair comes back curly or straight. Gray or brown. And yes, what you saw earlier was a wig that needed drying after being in the snow.”
A wig.
His heart hurt for her. Not because she’d lost her hair, but because he’d lost his sister to cancer eighteen months earlier and he understood what Jess was going through. “You’ve had surgery?”
She nodded.
“Radiation?”
“Six weeks. I was stage two before it was discovered.”
That meant it wasn’t contained. “And then the chemo?”
“You know too much about this,” she said as she swung the door wider and reached for the second bag. “We’re letting all the heat out, Shane.”
“Chrissie died a year and a half back. Thyroid cancer.”
“Oh, Shane, I’m sorry.”
His turn to grimace. “She was alone with two kids when she got diagnosed. Her husband had left the year before, so I brought her to Baltimore. She got treatment and the kids had family close by. She got six good years with me and the kids, so I try to be grateful for that, but it wasn’t enough. You know?”
“Yeah. I know.”
Of course she knew. She was living it. “I’m sorry about this, Jess.”
She squared her shoulders. “It happens.”
“Sometimes there’s no explaining or understanding God’s timing.” She made a face. “You don’t embrace that idea?” he asked.
“Let’s just say that if a patient thinks prayer will help, I encourage it. A good doctor understands we don’t just treat the symptoms. We treat the mental, physical, emotional and spiritual, even if we’re not believers.”
“Well, this believer is putting you on his prayer list.” He set down the third bag as Mary came into the room. She lifted her brows in surprise.
“I heard voices.” She smiled at him then noticed the bags. “Oh, Shane, did you go after Jess’s stuff?”
“No big deal.” He raised his hands, palms out, and backed toward the door.
“Stay for supper,” Mary urged.
“Pete’s in the truck. He helped me. Gotta get back to the kids, but thank you.”
“Then at least let me pack food for all of you.” Sympathy marked Mary’s expression. “I have beef stew and fresh bread. Will they eat that?”
The rich scent of cooked beef made him want to stay, but he shouldn’t. Not with so much to do. “Nettie fed them already. But thank you. I sincerely appreciate the offer.” Annette “Nettie” Bondi, the kids’ nanny, would be heading back north soon. She had a grandbaby due next week, though she’d made the trip to Tennessee to help get them settled. Lack of power had delayed that, but full service had been restored to the valley that afternoon. Now he just had to find a place for him and his workers to stay.
“Then you and Pete should have supper here.”
“I’m sure he’s got things to do, Mom,” Jess chimed in.
He did. He needed to figure out specs on the three buildings he’d toured today, including Kendrick Creek Medical, Mary’s clinic, and draw up supply lists. Yet something about the way Jess tried to push him off made him square his shoulders. “Actually, it’s nothing that can’t wait an hour or two and I’m sure Pete would love a home-cooked meal. Me, too.”
Mary smiled, delighted. “Perfect! I’ll set two more places.”
He regretted his rash decision the minute he’d said the words, but he couldn’t back out now.
Jess skewered him with a look.
He ignored it.
He’d watched Chrissie trudge a rough path twice. Once with her original diagnosis and then, when the cancer resurged five years later, in her long, hard fight before she went home to God. She’d left Shane a niece and nephew to raise, ages eight and ten now, two kids that had called him “Pops” from the time they were little. It had been a joke back then. The joke became reality when their mom died.
He knew about fighting the disease firsthand. And while he and Jess had no love lost for one another, he was pretty sure her mother would welcome some support because watching someone you love suffer was way harder than suffering yourself. He strode out to the pickup and shut the engine off. “We’ve been invited for supper.”
“Don’t have to ask me twice.” Pete bounded out of the truck. “Anything that isn’t slapped across a stainless-steel counter is a huge step up.” He followed Shane and entered Mary’s eclectic home.
When he spotted Jess, Pete didn’t miss a beat. “Ma’am, I’m so grateful at the thought of real food that if you wanted me to go down that hill and haul that car up on my shoulders, I’d do it.”
Jess laughed.
Shane’s pulse spiked the minute he heard that sound.
He’d fallen for that laugh a long time ago, and to hear it now, understanding her condition, made it even more special. “No need for that level of heroics,” she assured him, and stretched out her hand. “I’m Jess Bristol. I’ve come home to help my mother get the clinic back in order.”
Unlike Shane’s look of surprise, her condition didn’t make Pete miss a beat. “It’ll be a team effort to set things right, and my partner here has set a twelve-week calendar to get stuff done so we don’t mess with our contracts back home. Folks keep telling me this is a get-it-done kind of town, so I think we’ll be okay.”
“Wonderful.” She reached over and nonchalantly slipped a pale blue knit hat over her head as if covering baldness was no big deal.
It wasn’t, but Shane couldn’t help remembering the feel of her long, curly brown hair. How if you stretched out one of those curls, the straightened lock came halfway down her back, but sprang back up to rest on her shoulders when you let go.
He’d dreamed of that as a teen. She’d have thought him silly then, because a kid related to infamous crime families in nearby Newport, the same group that tried to get Chrissie in their law-breaking clutches, shouldn’t have a crush on the town doctor’s daughter. Especially not when she was not only voted most likely to succeed, she’d gone and done it.
But when she looked up at Pete and laughed at something he said, something akin to jealousy ran through him.
Seeing Jess brought up a whole bunch of what-ifs. Like, what if her deposition hadn’t put him in jail? Could there have been something between them?
No.
His head understood that. It always had. So why couldn’t his heart get with the program?
Shane had no idea.
CHAPTER THREE
As a kid, Jess’d had a print of Peaceable Kingdom on her bedroom wall, the artistic rendering of carnivores and herbivores getting along. It was based on some Bible verse about the lion laying down with the lamb.
As if.
In reality, the lion would make an easy dinner of the lamb, but sitting at a supper table with the man she’d put in jail reminded her of that picture.
You did nothing wrong. You testified about what you saw. Kids make mistakes. They pay for them. End of story.
She’d tried to convince herself of that. It worked most of the time, but every now and again, her brain took her back to that night, seeing Shane with that huge wad of money then imagining him sitting in jail. The knowledge that her words had sent a man, barely more than a boy, to prison, made her gut ache.
“So, Pete, have you and Shane been working together long?” Mary asked as she served up bowls of rich beef stew.
“Shane got out two years before I did,” Pete began. If Jess reacted to his words, he was gentleman enough not to notice. “He got a job with a contractor near Baltimore who needed good help and was willing to give us a shot. Then when Shane noticed some zombie properties here and there, we decided to branch out on our own.” He spotted her confused expression and added, “Abandoned places. Waiting for some TLC. We’d fix them up and flip them before it became a thing.”
“So you worked together to build a business,” Jess observed.
“We employ several ex-cons,” Shane said simply. “Guys who needed a hand up, not a handout.”
“Shane.” Mary reached a hand to his arm as Jess passed the basket of freshly baked rolls. Mary’s warm expression of approval hit Jess’s midsection. “That’s wonderful. What a marvelous way of completing the circle of caring.”
Mary turned to Pete. She didn’t see Shane’s reaction to her words. But Jess did. She was about to say something, but Pete jumped in.
“Ma’am, this is beyond a delight,” he exclaimed. “I’m never a fussy eater, but that doesn’t make me less appreciative about the wonder of this meal.”
“I expect it was cold up on that mountain,” she said.
Pete laughed. “Well, I was operating the winch and had the truck cab to warm my hands and my face, but Shane was the one who went down the hill in the ice and cold on the end of a tether.”
“You needed a tether to get down there?” Jess pictured the wrecked SUV midway down the steep incline and frowned. “Of course you did. Shane, what were you thinking? What if you’d been hurt?”
“I wasn’t,” he told her in a mild tone, and it was just mild enough to ruffle her feathers. “And you needed your things. You’re a doctor. You’re here to help. And Mary’s clothes don’t exactly fit, in case you haven’t noticed.”
She saw the glint of amusement in his eyes when he looked her way.
“A little short in the sleeve is all. Well...” Jess glanced down. “The legs, too. But you could have waited until tomorrow.”
“One thing life’s taught me is never wait until tomorrow and don’t leave folks hanging. The lessons I learned growing up on the mountain have never left me. And never will,” he vowed as he buttered a third roll. “Be fair, work hard, jump in as needed.”
“Even though some folks treated your family poorly.” Mary made the quiet observation as she waited for a spoonful of stew to cool.
“My extended family gave people reason to talk, sure. It wasn’t who I was, or who I am, but it’s old news now. Jesus did mention that seventy times seven rule, right?”
“My kind of hero.” Mary raised her spoon in salute.
“No hero. Just a guy who wants to help get people back on their feet down here.” Shane stood. “We’ve got to push on. Mary, can I help with dishes?”
“No, sir, you cannot,” she told him firmly. “You men get on. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow?” Jess asked.
Mary raised both brows, surprised. “Of course.”
Jess didn’t need Mary’s puzzled expression to figure out the obvious. Shane would be overseeing the reconstruction of her mother’s clinic, which meant he’d be underfoot every day. Jess tried wrapping her brain around that and couldn’t because she hadn’t bargained for this.
“I’m going to get the church back in order,” noted Pete. “With a stretch of good weather, we can get a lot done before we need to head back home. Once the outside’s secure, the weather don’t matter much except to our shoes, so I’m hoping the church can be done soon.”
“Gentlemen, thank you again for gathering Jess’s things,” her mother said. “And for staying for supper.”
“Pure pleasure, ma’am.” Pete bowed slightly in a sweet gesture of respect. “Good night to you both.”
“I’ll see you tomorrow, Mary.” Shane spotted his jacket hanging by the woodstove. He picked it up, felt the warmth and smiled. “All dry. Thank you,” he said to Jess.
Was it his words that spurred the flicker of her heart? His gaze? She wasn’t sure.
“I’ll get the generators hooked up to give us power,” he told her mother. “It should be light enough to get things rolling by eight or so.”
“This early in January, more like eight thirty, but whatever works for you, Shane. And I’ll be right across the street if you need anything. Some of my friends helped me set up a makeshift clinic in the empty law office.”
“Whatever works in a pinch, right?”
He strode through the small house. When he got to the front door, he turned and seemed surprised to find Jess behind him. Surprised and almost happy, she thought. But then the happiness faded. “I wanted to thank you again,” she told him.
He brushed it off. “None needed. Just doing a good turn.”
“Shane—”
“Gotta go. Thanks for supper. And...” He reached out and touched the three bright-toned flowers crocheted onto the side of her chemo cap. “Nice hat.”
Was it the way he said it? Or the fact that he treated her and the hat as if a new normal was still just normal?
None of this was normal. The fire, the job, the stupid cancer.
None of that mattered when Shane talked to her. The sweet gesture made her heart skip as if lighter. “Thanks.”
He met her gaze again, briefly. Just long enough for her to see the compassion in his eyes.
She didn’t want him feeling sorry for her. She didn’t want anyone feeling sorry for her. She’d faced her almost year-long treatment pretty much alone at one of the best facilities in the nation. She had so much to be grateful for. Pity annoyed her, but it wasn’t pity she saw in Shane’s eyes.
It was understanding. As if he knew her, better than others did. As if he got it.
But how could that be when every time she looked at him, regret flooded her brain like the streets of Lower Manhattan in Superstorm Sandy.
* * *
I hate cancer.
The thought hit Shane as he started the truck.
He’d read the guilt in her face when their eyes met. Guilt over something that had happened a long time ago, an emotion she shouldn’t feel. He knew that. She didn’t. He’d purposely left the past in the past. Faith and friendship had bolstered him.
But now he was back where every corner held a memory, every sight took him to a childhood that left so much to be desired.
He pulled into the motel parking lot, said good-night to Pete and knocked on Nettie’s door. She opened it with a wide smile. “Shane, how did everything go today? Were you able to get a good look at the damaged areas?”
She didn’t ask about housing for the kids as he stepped inside and closed the door, but Jolie wasn’t about to let him off so easily. She wasn’t happy. She hadn’t been happy for a while, and he wasn’t sure how to fix that. How did one fix the loss of a mother for a ten-year-old and an eight-year-old?
He couldn’t, but he’d promised Chrissie he’d do his best.
She’d hugged him because she knew he meant it, but his lack of success with Jolie weighed heavy on his shoulders.
She stood on the opposite side of the motel room and folded her arms with a look of expectation. “Are we staying here forever, Pops?”
He shook his head. “Another day or two is all, until I find a place to rent, sugar.”
“I mean this place. This town. This state.” Disdain oozed out of her pores. “This isn’t our home. It’s not even close to our home, it’s so far away. I don’t know why we couldn’t stay with the Platts. They invited us because they like us.”
The Platts were a lovely family in their Maryland neighborhood that had offered their help when Shane decided to come to Tennessee. “Because I need you with me,” Shane told her mildly.
Sammy skipped out of the bathroom just then, freshly showered and in superhero pajamas. The eight-year-old vaulted over a small suitcase and landed at Shane’s feet with an expression of absolute love. “Pops! Nettie took us shopping and got us some summer stuff because she said it gets hot pretty quick down here and we might need shorts and stuff before we go home, and I said that would be great even though it’s not warm now.” He made an “eek!” face at the snowy window. “Do you think she’s kidding?”
Sammy’s love and trust had been a given from the beginning, way back when Chrissie’s first treatments had begun. Jolie was different. She held back, and if Shane had an easy way to help her see the good in life, he’d use it, but it didn’t exist. Lately he’d been wondering what he was doing wrong with her, but how could he figure that out?
Faith.
He hugged Sammy close. “You smell good, she’s not kidding, and even though it’s snowing now, that’s all right. Spring comes early in Tennessee and those shorts will come in handy, I promise you. And the way you’re growing, buddy, you’re going to need new things.”
Beyond the window the motel’s somewhat garish Christmas lights mocked thoughts of spring. Sporadic holiday lighting brightened the road between Kendrick Creek and Wilton Springs, a reminder that Christmas felt like a long time ago. Not five simple days.
Sam hugged him.
Jolie didn’t. She looked like she wanted to, but then she turned, picked up a book, and curled up on the far bed. “I’ll try to find us a place tomorrow,” he promised her. He crossed the room, bent and kissed her forehead. She didn’t look up. Punishing him for uprooting them, no doubt. “Love you, JoJo.”
The old nickname usually made her smile.
Not tonight.
Nettie sent him an understanding look as Sam hugged him then scrambled onto the rollaway bed. “This bed is so cool!” He laughed from his spot low on the floor. “I can fall off a thousand times and never get hurt once!”
“Good to hear.” He kissed Sammy and gave Nettie a wave before he left the room. “I’m right next door if you need me,” he reminded her.
Later on, when he stepped outside for a breath of cold, crisp mountain air after he’d crunched way too many numbers, the windows of their room were dark.
Had he been wrong to bring them here?
Maybe.
But he’d done it for their own good. And his. He only hoped it had been the right thing to do.
