Last Chance Texas, page 17
He turned his attention to Irene. The notion of her sleeping at the hospital concerned him deeply. She needed to be at his house, stretched out on a bed, within reach of her grandkids. They were, after all, what kept her going.
But they’d been over that several times. She wouldn’t leave Warren’s side, which meant that Nathan would be spending the night at the hospital as well.
“I’m going to go into the waiting area and make a call.”
“Are you calling Kelsey?” As stressed out as she was, Irene still had the tenacity to press him on his private life. Actually, that was a good sign.
“Yup.”
He left before she continued quizzing him.
With an empty waiting room, Nathan didn’t need to sneak into a corner for privacy. When he dialed Kelsey’s number, she picked up on the first ring.
“Hey.”
God, she sounded so reassuring. The calm in the eye of a hurricane.
“Hey, yourself.” He struggled to think of what else to say, the fatigue and stress slowly beginning to consume him.
“The kids are sound asleep. Tommy’s head barely hit the pillow before he zonked out.”
“And Jessica?”
Kelsey laughed at his question. “Well, let’s just say you definitely need some new children’s book. I mean, you can only read Curious George so many times.”
“It seems to work for Caitlyn.”
“Okay. Caitlyn’s five and Jess is nine.”
“I gather that’s a lifetime in the eyes of a child.”
“Pretty much, Nathan. Pretty much.”
They talked for several more minutes before he mustered up the nerve to ask her. “I need to stay with Irene. Any chance you could spend the night with the kids? You could just crash out on my bed.”
“We already have.”
“I appreciate this more than you know, Kelsey. I mean it.”
He made the decision not to utter another word about the land. For the time being, he needed Kelsey’s help.
Chapter 13
One week later Kelsey stood in the kitchen of Nathan’s farmhouse preparing a late night snack for Tommy and Jessica.
Against her better judgment, she’d stayed on at Nathan’s to help out with the children. Her dad had called twice and was apparently chomping at the bit to drive out Alpine and make sure his little girl was being treated well. It would only be a matter of time before he’d pack up the car and head west.
“Kelsey, can you stay here forever?” Jessica’s scrunched up her face as she asked the question. When Kelsey didn’t respond, the little girl rearranged herself on the high-backed, wooden kitchen chair, her knees curled up under her. “Can you?”
As Kelsey stared at the old-fashioned looking kitchen, red gingham curtains, the dated appliances, and dark-green rug beneath the table, she decided it could use a makeover. Of course, that would probably never happen. Not because Nathan would be opposed to the idea. He just didn’t have enough hours in the day to bother redecorating.
Jessica must have read her mind. “Can we get some pink curtains, Kelsey? I love pink.”
“Getting tired of the red, are you?” Kelsey watched Jessica’s mouth form into an enormous pout. The girl was the queen of drama. Probably worse than Kelsey had been as a child.
“I want either pink or purple. And I want a pink stove, too. I saw one when my grandma took us to a yard sale. It was sitting on the front lawn with a big bow wrapped around it, and it was pretty.”
Quite a visual. The only thing that pink stove had probably been missing was the pink and red plastic flowers that were on the wreath that she’d brought to Mimi’s graveside. She secretly wondered how long it took for Nathan to yank it from his wife’s grave.
“Well, we’ll have to talk to Nathan about changing the décor.”
“What’s décor?” Jessica had a million questions, and Kelsey absolutely delighted in how curious the child was. So far, the questions had, for the most part, been directed at Kelsey, but once she left, she suspected Nathan would inherit the chore of answering the endless string of questions.
Scooting her chair forward, Kelsey decided now was as good a time as any to level with Jessica; to tell her that beginning tomorrow she’d be staying at Mimi’s old place. Nathan had cleared out his things and moved the clinic somewhere else. She hadn’t a clue where, and she honestly didn’t care. It was his problem, not hers.
“Jessica, I won’t be staying here anymore. Your grandpa’s in rehab and it shouldn’t be too long before you get to go home with him. I’ll bet you and Tommy can go see him soon. Maybe even tomorrow.” It occurred to her that she had no right to offer them so much hope. Still, they’d been through so much.
“Oh, goody!” Jessica bolted from the chair and began dancing about the kitchen.
Oh, to have all that energy and such a rosy outlook on life!
Kelsey jumped from the chair she sat on, reached out and grabbed the child’s tiny hands, and the two of them began dancing about. As a country song blared from the radio, they both stomped their feet and began singing aloud at the top of their lungs.
To Kelsey it was practically an out of body experience since she typically didn’t listen to this much country music. She considered that all Nathan really needed was one radio station as that was all he ever listened to. Pretty sad when you know all the likes and dislikes of the radio announcers-right down to how they’d vote for the upcoming election.
“I’m going to see my Grandpa and Grandma again. Yippee! Ha, ha, ha, I will see them both again!” Jessica was making up a tune that caused Kelsey to chuckle.
“Ladies.” Nathan’s deep baritone voice rumbled out the greeting as he yanked open the screen door and strode toward them. When Jessica raced over to see him, she wrapped her tiny arms about his waist.
Kelsey glanced over at Nathan as he stood watching her, his expression pensive.
“How long have you been standing there?” After Kelsey said it, he didn’t so much as crack a smile.
“Long enough.” He looked drawn. Drawn and hard. Like a man who’d just been put through the ringer.
“Nathan! Kelsey said Tommy and me can go stay with my grandma and grandpa soon. Can we go visit them tomorrow? Kelsey said we could.”
When the light in Nathan’s eyes dimmed, Kelsey realized she’d been out of line promising Jessica something she couldn’t deliver. While he didn’t say anything about the promise, he stood quietly, shaking his head.
“I’m afraid Ms. Kelsey spoke out of turn.” He made no attempt to gloss things over; no attempt to try at least a little to put Jessica at ease.
“I was just about to put the kids down for the evening.” It was all she could come up with because she suspected that within the course of the evening, she and Nathan were about to argue. They’d avoided each other all week, thanks to the four thousand square foot farmhouse, the long hours his career demanded, and the time he’d spent at the hospital. But now things were changing. If she stayed here any longer, they’d be tripping over each other.
“I’m going to head upstairs and clean up. After that, I’d like to speak with you, Kelsey.”
Between his icy glare and the formal tone of his voice, Kelsey realized Nathan was in a foul mood. She’d only been to the hospital one time to see Warren. And, apparently, things had taken a down turn since that visit.
“I gather Warren had a rough day.”
He frowned again. “I don’t want to talk about him right now.”
“Nathan, I—”
“I said it can wait. I’m going upstairs to clean up.”
I heard you the first time. I’m not stupid.
Placing his large hands on the little girl’s shoulders, Nathan spoke. But this time, his tone was gentle. “I’ll tuck you in tonight. I love you, Sweet Pea.”
Without another word, he sauntered across the kitchen and trudged upstairs.
~ ~ ~
Nathan finished drying himself after the long, hot shower and grabbed the shirt and jeans from yesterday from the back of the computer chair.
You’re a real prick, Wainwright. You know that?
As miserable as his day had been, there was no need to have taken things out on Kelsey. She didn’t deserve that. But the truth was he didn’t like her hanging around. It was frustrating watching her stroll about the house, straightening things up, acting as though she was a part of the family. She’d soon be starting a family of her own. Of course, he had reservations about the way she was going about it - claiming land that was rightfully his.
Grabbing a comb, he raked it through his hair.
You look like hell.
He stared at his reflection, thinking he’d aged ten years in the past week. Warren’s condition had deteriorated even more so today. Irene was so broken up she could barely function. Nathan had ended up calling his mom to come take Irene home with her. It would do the woman good to see something other than heart monitors, ECGs, and hospital beds with drab, white sheets.
The house was unbelievably quiet for a change, like it’d been after Michele passed. He drank in the silence but abruptly decided that in spite of the fact he’d been alone for the past five years, the sound of laughter and children’s feet padding about the house definitely lifted his spirits.
The door to the kids’ room was ajar. Jessica and Tommy had opted to share a room. They only had each other now, and the thought of what would become of them if Irene could no longer keep them frustrated Nathan.
Tiptoeing into the room, he noticed a night light that cast a golden glow about the room. He suspected Kelsey had been responsible for that.
Looking down at the two children snuggled up together, he felt overwhelmed with all he’d taken on. But as he stared down at the two of them, snuggled up like two peas in a pod, he was glad he’d agreed to take them in.
Kneeling down on the small, braided rug his grandmother had made, Nathan leaned over and kissed each of the Randall children on their foreheads. Tommy thrashed his legs about for several seconds, and Nathan patted the boy’s back to calm him down. When he kissed Jessica, she worked her tiny mouth as if she was about to say something, but quickly rolled over on her side.
As Nathan pulled the blankets about both children’s shoulders, he decided to quit fretting about what would become of these children if Warren didn’t get better. For the first time in several days, there was clarity.
He knew at that moment in time that it would be he who would care for these children. He wasn’t sure how, but it didn’t really matter. He’d always been the big brother, the great protector, and that would never change. Situations changed over time, but he hadn’t. No one on this earth would take those children from him.
Love you both. I’ve got your backs.
A sweet calm hovered over him, and for the first time in a week, he felt a rush of intense, incredible, welcome relief.
As he made his way back downstairs, he paused at the top of the step. He’d been such a grouch that he absolutely dreaded talking to Kelsey. Of course, he couldn’t let her go to bed this angry with him. Not that she’d care. Still . . .
When he walked into the kitchen, Kelsey stood at the sink, washing several dishes. Striding over to join her, he picked up a hand towel and began drying a glass. She didn’t give him so much as a fleeting glance. Served him right.
But when she tossed down the dishrag and began walking away, Nathan felt compelled to say something. He followed her and touched her arm. To his disappointment, she brushed him off.
“Kelsey, I’m sorry about the way I acted earlier.”
Her dark eyes blazed with anger as she tossed her head back. “I’ve been helping you out all week, Nathan. I try to carry on a simple conversation with you, and you’ll have no part of it. Is that the way you operate?”
“No, it’s just that—”
“You must have been one helluva husband, Nathan.”
The comment stopped him cold.
He stood silently, glancing about the kitchen, staring at the red, gingham curtains, unable to think of a single thing to say. So, that was how Kelsey viewed him - a man who treated the women in his life poorly. She’d already formed her opinion. It was pointless to even try and defend himself.
“No, Kelsey-I didn’t used to be like this.”
He stared down at the floor, and by the time he looked up, Kelsey was touching his arm as her eyes pooled.
“That was harsh, Nathan. I didn’t mean it. I’m so sorry - so deeply sorry.”
“That’s all right. I think we’re both a bit on edge.”
“Let’s sit down and talk things out.” When she motioned him to a nearby chair, he flopped down.
“You know, Kelsey, I’ve had the lousiest day since I can remember.”
After he said it, Kelsey just sat there quietly, looking at him.
“Okay, I know that’s no excuse . . .”
She suddenly broke into a smile, the amber flecks in her eyes lighting up, just the way they always did when she was amused. Maybe with Kelsey honesty was just the best route to go. Of course, there was the alternative. Was she simply enjoying watching him grovel? Given the fact he’d been such a jerk, she had every right to watch him squirm.
“I shouldn’t have told Jessica that Warren was doing so well, that she’d be able to see Warren so soon. That was wrong. I know that now. And I know that picking up the pieces will fall to you.” As she said it, she frowned. “I guess I thought if I wanted it badly enough, Warren would get better.”
Unable to stop himself, he reached for her hand.
He struggled for something to say that would put the falling out they’d had squarely where it belonged; on his shoulders. “Tomorrow could be better. Warren had a bad day today, but the next few days could be much better. I didn’t mean to snap like that, Kelsey. I guess things just piled up on me.”
She pulled her hand away and leaned back, studying him critically. “As on top of things as you always appear to be, I assume you’ve looked into other arrangements for the kids. You certainly can’t keep them.”
Her eyes were glued on him now as she drew her mouth into a frown. “Seriously, Nathan, you’re not considering keeping them.”
The comment stunned him.
“You think I did such a crappy job raising Maura that having a crack at raising the Randall kids wouldn’t be in their best interest. Is that what you think, Kelsey?”
“Stop putting words in my mouth, Nathan. I don’t think that at all. It’s just that with the long hours your career requires, and the fact that these children are at an age where they need lots of supervision, I think you’re in over your head.”
He swallowed several times, making every effort not to come off sounding as angry as he was. “We take care of our own out here, Kelsey. That’s how we roll. And as far as Jessica and Tommy traipsing off to live with some family they don’t even know, well, that’s not going to happen.”
Before she could reply, he bolted from the chair, slammed it against the kitchen table and raced up the steps, two at a time.
~ ~ ~
Had the man lost his freaking mind?
Kelsey remained glued to the kitchen chair, stunned at Nathan’s reaction. The twelve-hour days he put in racing about the countryside, caring for his clients’ animals nearly did him in. How could he possibly raise two kids and juggle such a demanding career?
His defensive attitude frustrated her. She was, after all, just trying to help. Her intention had been to help him not repeat the same mistakes twice. Hadn’t he been the one to confess what a horrible job he did raising his stepdaughter?
There was no way he’d be able to give those kids what they needed. Truth be told it’d been Kelsey who’d cared for the kids during the past seven days. Left to his own devices, Nathan would never be able to manage on his own.
When Kelsey realized how little attention Nathan had paid to all the help she’d given him, she closed her eyes and shook her head. She made the decision to go with her original plan and move into Mimi’s place. But this time she wouldn’t lift a finger to help out with the children. Let the guy completely screw things up; which he invariably would.
But could she really do it-really watch Nathan fail something he obviously wanted to succeed at? A twinge of guilt twisted her heart like a dagger. Deep down, of course, she actually did want him to succeed. But as realistic as the guy was about most things, he had a blind spot when it came to family responsibilities. He seemed to believe that anything was possible. Obviously he cared deeply about Warren and Irene and wanted desperately to help out with the kids. But it could never work.
Did she want Nathan to fail? If he did, those kids would suffer.
And yet-if he succeeded at raising the Randall children, he’d be all the more desperate to sell off Mimi’s land and pocket the money to help with expenses.
Tears spilled down her cheeks as she struggled to come to terms with who should get the land. While she hated herself for being so self-centered, she had only a small window of time here. If she didn’t begin the in vitro soon, chances were conceiving a child would prove more difficult with each passing month.
Keep your eye on the ball, Kelsey. This baby will mean the world to you.
Staring out into the night sky, the moon casting a warm, golden glow about the landscape, Kelsey realized that if she didn’t get on with things, didn’t get the deal closed on the land and begin the in vitro she’d end up fretting about what would become of two children that weren’t any of her concern.
