The Civilized Guide to Tabletop Gaming, page 7
Stella also made a pact with a good friend, Katie, who would help her retrieve games. Theirs was a really friendly and totally unintimidating shakedown operation; Stella was the loan shark and Katie was the muscle. She’d tell the person who hadn’t yet returned a game as agreed that she had offered to lend said game to Katie. She’d offer to come by herself and grab it for Katie or have Katie swing by and pick up the game. This really helped Stella avoid having awkward and confrontational conversations with her friends about returning her games.
If you’re lending out your games, don’t let them out into the wilderness without protection. Check out Chapter 6: Hosting Game Nights for tips on protecting your games, so you don’t lose friendships over spilled milk (on your tabletop game).
Put Your Phone Away
Distraction not only undermines your ability to focus on a game, it effectively tells the people you’re gaming with that whatever is going on elsewhere is more important than the people who are there with you right now.
It is utterly infuriating to be sitting at a table with someone and have to remind him that it’s his turn to act, or constantly have to repeat what actions were taken by players prior because somebody was looking at her phone and not paying attention. There is no Facebook post, Tweet, or Cracked.com article that needs your attention more than the game you’re playing right now.
To be fair, there are certain situations where that may be the case, but in most situations, unless there’s a pressing reason (one that’s also known to people at the gaming table) for you to check your phone for messages, just put it away. If there is something that requires your attention to the extent that you can’t turn off your phone, you probably shouldn’t be at a gaming night. Have a pregnant wife who might burst at any time? Stay home and play games with her. Have a call with a possible employer? It probably won’t help the interview along if your friends are in the background laughing about their highly inappropriate Cards Against Humanity card combination.
You can put your phone away for games, that is, unless it’s really a glamored disguise for your magic wand to help you fight He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named. In which case, Harry, just don’t let the Muggles see it.
Chapter Four
How to Play Games (So You Don’t Get Smacked Down)
Chapter 1 covered some broad game-defining mechanics. This chapter covers the basics of game mechanics, showing you how to conduct your gameplay in a way that is both fair and fun for all involved.
It may seem like rolling dice or moving pieces is simple and straightforward. But it’s not until you’re in the midst of fighting about a game component’s facing or arguing if a cocked die counts that you realize the importance of adhering to these basic conventions. Such things as deciding whose turn it is or what counts as a dice roll may seem straightforward enough and hard to screw up. If only that were the case. The fact of the matter is that every action listed in this chapter is a result of a gaming-night horror story (or many horror stories).
At home, follow the rules in this chapter to the letter and your games will play faster, smoother, and friendlier, and you’ll have more fun. When playing games with strangers at your FLGS or at a convention or event, adhering to these rules will keep you from getting smacked down as a rude dick, or at least keep you from sitting at a table surrounded by people who are highly annoyed at you (for good reason, I assure you).
You will also have the added benefit of avoiding confusion, which sometimes precipitates rage-quitting accompanied by table flipping. Neither of those is a part of a good gaming experience.
Given that you’ve proven how intelligent, interesting, and attractive an individual you are—well, I mean you bought this book and read this far in it, didn’t you?—I don’t want you being humiliated because you counted results of dice that fell off the table onto the floor. Of course not! So let’s get to it.
A Quick Note on Cheating: Don’t
There is no game you need to win so badly that you need to cheat. The possibility of being alienated by a gaming community or being publicly outed as a cheater, particularly in the age of the Internet where your past actions have become part of a permanent record, accessible by all, is too much. If you don’t believe me, just look up the names on Fantasy Flight Games Suspended Participant List on Google. Now imagine what a potential employer, a possible gaming partner, or a blind date who Googles those names would think. It’s just a game—you can afford the loss.
Roll Your Dice the Right Way
If you’ve presumed that rolling dice is a simple task, I’m so happy for you. You have never encountered a douche dice roller, which is something you never want to do. But just in case you don’t want to ever become a douche dice roller, here are the rules to dice rolling.
If you’re rolling dice as a game action, announce that action. If the action has a variable number of dice rolled, announce how many dice you’ll be rolling and how you derived that number. Many games (especially D&D) have different kinds of dice that are rolled in different situations. Announce which of these you’re rolling (for instance, “I’m rolling a d10 for Initiative”).
Then roll the dice.
If you need to pick up the dice to roll again, let your opponent see the dice you will be rerolling first. In one game I play (Warhammer 40K), you roll a mitt full of dice and then get to reroll the dice that are higher than a certain number. I roll, remove any misses so my opponents can see that the dice I’ll be picking up again to reroll are actually qualified to be rerolled, and then reroll them. Making a comment about what number you’re looking for (“Anything but ones!” or “Three plus is what I need to hit”) also makes it clear what you need so your opponent has the chance to point out misses. I’ve seen douche dice rollers who pick up their rerolls first, don’t let their opponents inspect the dice results before they start rerolling, and are unclear about the number of dice they’re rolling, let alone how they derived that number.
Another thing that is in extremely poor form is to throw dice forcefully, knocking over gaming tokens, components, or other elements of the game—sometimes knocking them right off the table. This is especially douchey when components are hand-painted or fragile—a forcefully thrown die can mar a paint job or damage a model. If you have ever done this, let me explain some basic physics to you: Rolling dice harder doesn’t make them roll higher. Believe me when I say that’s the kind of behavior that will make you unwelcome in some gaming circles in the future, with good reason.
If you’re rolling a handful of dice and you drop one (or it escapes your hands for whatever reason), consider it rolled. Don’t wait to read its outcome before deciding to pick it up and reroll it. That’s bad form. If there’s confusion whether the die actually rolled (giving it the opportunity to change its result) or it just fell flat, ask your opponents if they’d prefer you to reroll it or not. You have to pay for your clumsiness by submitting to their wishes.
Cocked dice can also put people on edge. Cocked dice are dice that do not land flat on the playing surface. This is common when you’re playing on a gaming surface that is uneven because various gaming components are part of the play surface (for example, when you’re playing with miniatures laid out on gaming terrain). If you have a second die that is the same size, you can balance it on top of the cocked one. If the second die doesn’t balance, reroll it. If you don’t have a second die to check, just reroll the die (after, of course, you ask all of your opponents if you can reroll it because it is cocked).
Some games (such as tabletop war games and role-playing games) don’t include dice in the box and allow you to bring your own dice to the game. Do not, under any circumstances, think that novelty image dice are appropriate when other people need to see the outcomes. If a reasonable human being cannot read the result on your dice from six feet away, get better dice.
Oh, and one more thing: Dice that land on the floor need to be rerolled. Floor dice don’t count if you’re playing a tabletop game, capisce?
On Dice Trays
You should consider getting a dice tray, which will help with a few of the issues I point out when it comes to dice rolling. Companies like Wyrmwood make luxury ones, and many FLGSs sell standard ones; if you don’t want to purchase one, you can make your own. In the past I’ve used shoebox lids, gift boxes, and picture frames (with the glass removed, of course). Anything with a lip that has a flat surface for dice to settle flat and that won’t dominate the playing surface makes a good dice tray.
Follow Turn Sequence
Some games have a very simple turn sequence that is easy to follow. Some games have complicated turn sequences, with many steps and processes, upkeeps and new costs, and other nuanced mechanics.
Those games tend to have gaming aids that help walk players through all the steps and show in which order they’re to be taken. Follow the turn sequence as laid out in the rules; don’t try to do things out of sequence as it tends to change the balance and fairness of the game. If you do, it’s easy for other players to accuse you of cheating, especially if you’re trying to get benefits, such as revenue, before you are allowed to. Cooking the game this way could then allow you to purchase upgrades or abilities that should be out of your reach. (In Robo Rally, game sequence is crucial, especially the order in which game effects happen. Going out of sequence in this case directly affects the outcome of the game.)
When you’re going through your own turn sequence as a player, just announce which part of the turn you’re at. Let’s say you’re playing a game that has an upkeep phase, an action phase, and a housekeeping phase. Announce those as you go through your turn. Saying, “For my upkeep phase I’m going to . ” is an easy way to make it clear to your opponents what you’re doing and why you’re doing it.
If you make a mistake during one of your phases, stop and ask your opponents if it’s okay for you to correct what should have happened in an earlier phase. In particular, if your correction impacts your opponents negatively, always ask permission before you go back to make the correction.
Only Ask for One Do-Over
When it comes to asking to correct mistakes that negatively impact your opponents, only ask to correct one type of mistake once. After that, you should eat your mistake because you didn’t learn from the first time when they gave you leeway. Trust me: once you have to eat a mistake that costs you a game win, you’ll never make that mistake again. Think of it as getting a learning opportunity rather than screwing yourself over (although you’ve done both).
If the mistake negatively impacts you, offer to correct it the first time. After that, if you make the same mistake again, just correct it and tell your opponents why you’re not following the turn sequence in that moment and that the outcome will benefit them as it hinders you. Again, think of it as a teaching moment for yourself. At the same time, be forgiving and understanding to others when it comes to do-overs (remember to value the relationship over the game).
Trade Correctly and Politely
As a mechanic, trading components allow players to try to get what they need to win a game; the other side of it is that the trade may benefit another player and help their strategies to win the game.
If this mechanic is allowed by the game, make sure you know what the window is for negotiating trades. Sometimes it’s only done in a particular phase of a turn, sometimes it’s done in between turns, and sometimes negotiating trades can be done anytime during the game.
For example, in Zombicide, players can trade equipment and items, and virtually all trades positively impact the group, since the game is cooperative. Within the game, trades are an action a player takes during her own activation, meaning it takes up one of that player’s available actions during that activation. Despite the cooperative nature, out-of-sequence trades not only affect the flow of the game (as they can confuse whose turn it is to activate, or worse yet, disrupt the active player’s turn) but also basically cheat all the players around the table from a well-earned victory; out-of-sequence trades are essentially cheating against the rules.
Some players may also want to know who’s trading what, as that will affect their strategies. If the rules are not explicit about how trades should be handled, decide by consensus (preferably before you start playing the game) whether or not the group wants trades to happen one at a time so everyone can know what’s happening between players or if multiple negotiations can happen simultaneously.
Negotiating trades can interrupt game flow, and even the negotiation of a trade can impact the gaming experience of all the players, whether or not the trade goes through. Of course you want to win and make trades beneficial to yourself, but also remember that there are other people sitting around your gaming table. Be considerate of them and the time they are spending watching other players negotiate and deliberate. It’s not the most exciting thing in the world.
For this reason, brevity when negotiating and executing trades is hugely important and considerate to all your opponents. On the flip side, don’t monopolize game time by hesitating on a trade offer you already made. Worse still is asking to reverse a trade that was done according to the rules. Only children under the age of ten may ask for a trade back; otherwise, you’re stuck with the trade you made, because you’re a grownup. If you made a mistake in offering or taking a trade that was bad for you, you gotta eat it. That’s part of the game.
Trading with these things in mind will keep things fair and keep the game moving. And that’s a key element to good gaming experiences.
Negotiation as Part of Gameplay
In the popular board game Diplomacy, there’s actually a phase of gameplay called the diplomatic phase. During this time, players can talk to one another and negotiate strategic alliances, treaties, and so on. But—and here’s the big thing—negotiation only happens during that phase of the game. Anyone trying to do it later or earlier in gameplay is, well, a douche.
Shuffle and Draw Responsibly
Playing with cards is a staple in the world of tabletop gaming. Sometimes you’re actually playing a card game (e.g., Magic: The Gathering or Vampire: The Eternal Struggle), and sometimes the cards are an important part of the game, along with other components (e.g., Ticket to Ride or Sid Meier’s Civilization: The Board Game).
If there are cards involved in a game and there’s a shuffle-and-draw mechanic, shuffle your own deck but offer your opponent the opportunity to cut the deck before you draw. This is particularly polite if you’re playing a collectible card game, and each of you has her own deck.
Furthermore, only draw the number of cards you are permitted as outlined in the rules. If you draw more cards and the procedure for handling such situations isn’t outlined in the rules, announce to your opponent that you’ve unintentionally drawn too many, and offer to shuffle the surplus cards you’ve drawn back into your deck. Also offer to allow your opponent to cut the deck again. If he agrees or offers a different solution that is amenable to you, go with that. The key is to be clear and open about what you’re doing with your deck.
Score and Calculate Points Properly
Games have various ways of gaining points and tracking score. You should be clear about how you’re scoring. Like every other aspect of playing games, it’s far better to overcommunicate than undercommunicate. If you do the former, you’re just an overly meticulous gamer. If you do the latter, you might end up getting labeled as a cheater, particularly if you mess up on the math more than once.
This is especially true if you’re the player who takes the role of the banker or something equivalent within a game. You want to be seen as the person who just is sitting closest to the tokens, not as the person who might be embezzling under everyone’s noses. Don’t be that gamer.
If scoring is done in a specific phase of the game, announce the score you’ve earned in that phase as you track your score.
Playing the Game
Here’s how Mika announced her scoring: “I control X, Y and Z, which gives me 3 points, and I won battles in A, B and C, which gives me 5 points. So I’m up 8 points and need 8 tokens.”
Mika’s fellow players appreciate the clarity her announcement brings. It leaves no ambiguity in their minds about how she’s earned the points she says she scored.
Contrast that with Sean: “I scored 8. Gimme 8 tokens.”
Apart from being rude, there is no clarity how those points were scored, so for all Sean’s opponents know, he could be fabricating a number. That’s fine if Sean is playing with trusted friends, but it’s a douche move if he’s playing pickup games in his FLGS or something more competitive.
Announcing the way you’re scoring also has the added bonus of giving your opponents a chance to correct you if your math is off or if there are points you’re missing. Ambiguity is the enemy of decisive victory, so be unambiguous as to how you crushed your opponents’ skulls and earned points with their blood.
Be Helpful with Scoring
If your opponents are articulating their points like you, and you see an error, feel free to be helpful and redo the points tally with them, especially when they’re cheating themselves out of points. Remember: you want to win these games legitimately, not because you were better at math than your opponents. Victories that come from math errors are hollow at best.
