Queen of the City 3: The Life of a Female Rapper, page 13
I walked to Big Mama’s room, and it was just as still as it was a few days ago. No peace fell back on me, no tranquility, just an eerie quietness that seemed to become so loud that I couldn’t even stand in the room anymore. I left and walked back to the front and suddenly, there was an overwhelming feeling of sadness piercing through my heart. It didn’t take a genius to know what was going on inside me, and I couldn’t do anything about it. “Lyric? You aight?” I shook my head, “Nah. Let’s just go.”
We chilled over at Quandra’s house until later that night. She let us know what we needed to do because she was able to get some good information from the nigga she was talking to. She didn’t rob him because she figured out a way to make men just give her the money and anything else she wanted without using violence. Bitches do it all day long, but I think that we were just obsessed with being in complete control and flaunting pistols to enforce shit we wanted to do.
“So, yeah, the house is pretty fuckin’ secure. Like, you’re not just going to walk in there and get to him. It’s not so much his men; it’s the security system. He has some hi-tech shit, and the door is bolted. I don’t know how you get him out, but shit, it's damn near impossible to get in.”
I sat quietly, thinking about ways to get him outside but I couldn’t come up with anything. “Do you know if he ever comes out?” I asked, hoping she would say yes. “Yeah, he comes out but not as much as he used to.” I thought for a minute, and then I figured we would smoke him out, “Let’s just rob this nigga’s stash houses. The money will make this nigga come out if nothing else does.” Malley laughed,
“Shit, I’m down with it! You know I am, especially if money is involved. Quandra, you down?”
She shook her head, “I don’t know, y’all. That shit sounds like suicide to me.”
“Shit, I’m dying anyway, so it doesn't matter to me.”
“What? You’re dying?” Quandra asked, her eyebrows raised on her forehead.
“Nothing. I meant that if Nas is still out here, I’m going to die anyway. Yo’, that’s what we’re going to do, though. If you wanna roll, Quandra, you can.”
She thought to herself for a moment, “Nah, I’ma let y’all bitches handle that shit. I don’t want to fuck with it.”
“Aight, that’s cool.”
Quandra knew the seriousness behind it and I did, too but I didn’t care. This is what my life brought me to, and I was ready to deal with whatever came next. Now wasn’t the time to turn around—this was the only option.
Chapter 19
I remembered where all the stash houses were, and the only thing Nas did differently was switched their locations from time to time. It was around midnight when we got to the first one. It was the same house that Nas hit me for the very first time. We were dressed in all black, scoping out the surroundings for a little while before we made a move. There weren't many people outside, but I didn’t know how many were inside. I told Malley to dress up like a prostitute and stroll past them to get their attention. As soon as they lost focus, I would walk into the house and open up to anybody that was in there. This was the first time we’d ever done something like this, so we didn’t have a blueprint for it. It was all a learn-as-you-go-type of thing. Malley got out of the car and walked past a few of the young boys that were out on the porch. “Damn! Aye, you are the finest fuckin’ whore I saw in my life! I’d pay for that shit!” one of them said as he walked towards her. The other two boys went right after him, and when they were a good distance away, I snuck in through the front door and headed to the back where the money was kept.
As soon as I walked back there I saw two more men, but before they could react, I fired three shots and all of them connected with the two men as they fell backward into the wall. I heard four more shots outside as I ran to grab the money from under the wooden floor board. After I had picked it up, I ran outside, and Malley was nowhere in sight, but the boys that ran to her were all shot in the back, lying face down in the grass. Suddenly, the lights in our car flickered, and I ran to it. She pulled off as soon as I got in the car.
“Did you get it?” she asked as she drove away.
“I got it.”
I tossed the money in the back seat, and we drove to a hotel downtown and checked in. For the next week, that was our routine. We robbed houses left and right, shooting and killing anybody in our path. It was crazy how we both seemed to exhibit the ruthlessness of Nas in our pursuit of him. For a moment, it looked like I felt what he did when he was in the middle of everything. The rush felt like heroin shooting through my veins, and I wondered if this is what my mother and Uncle Stew felt when they injected themselves with the poison. Word got back to Nas that Malley and I were the ones robbing him. At first, he didn’t bat an eye, but since it kept happening, he was pissed. We kept people alive just so they could tell him that we were the ones doing it. Malley loved the money we brought in, but I wasn’t losing focus on what we were doing it for. We would hit random house’s so he could never figure out our pattern, but on the last run I told one of the men where we were going next,
“Tell Nas we will be at the house on 13th next. Let that nigga know we will be waiting for him.”
Blood spilled from his leg and at this point, people knew that we were coming for blood whenever we showed up. Suddenly, I felt like the queen of the city. I felt like I was at the top based on the fact that every nigga that saw me knew I wasn’t playing games. “Nas is going to be at that next house,” I told Malley as we were getting ready, “he is going to be the one tonight, so we need to go a little earlier. I want to be there before he shows up, I don’t want him to have the upper hand.” Malley fixed her makeup as she spoke,
“Look, Lyric. I know I said I was down with you and all this shit, but I kind of don’t want this to end. I think robbing these fucking stash houses is where the real money is at, not finessing niggas and getting a little bit of change. I’ve made more this past week than I did in a whole month of doing that shit.”
“Malley, what the fuck? I thought we were both in this shit for the same reason?”
“We were but shit changes. I say we let Nas keep making money, and we keep robbing that nigga’s houses.”
“He will eventually catch us, Malley. The nigga is not that dumb. The only reason I pushed the gas is because I came here to get this shit done, not live here.”
“Lyric, I mean seriously, though, look at this bread,” she said, holding up handfuls of one hundred dollar bills as some dropped to the floor. “Why would you want to stop this? This is money. Real money, Lyric. Fuck a vendetta. We can go from city to city doing this shit and bounce before it get too hot.”
“Look,” I placed two pistols on both sides of my waist, “if that’s what you want to do, then go ahead. But me? I’m here to do what the fuck I came to do, nothing more and nothing less. So, I’ma go handle up and if you’re rolling with me, then let’s go. If not, do you.”
I walked to the door and waited for her to make her decision. After a few seconds, she spoke up, “Go ahead. I’m chillin’.” I shook my head and slammed the hotel door behind me. If I was going to do this alone, then so be it. It didn’t matter to me because if I was the queen of the fucking city, then I was going to be the queen on my own. Nas wasn’t going to make it out of this night alive even if I had to die in the process.
Chapter 20
The neighborhood was empty when I got there. It wasn’t that late in the day when I showed up, and I knew what schedule Nas kept his people on. Some things you just don’t forget about, no matter how long you’ve been away. I parked my car a few blocks down and walked the city blocks down to the house. The sidewalks were scattered with fiends and pushers looking to sell or make a quick buck to get their fixes in. I walked past an alley where an older woman was giving head to another dude by some trash cans. It would have jarred me if it wasn’t something I was used to seeing, but here in the gutters of Milwaukee that shit was a normal occurrence. If they didn’t have the money to buy something, they were always willing to give up anything else for it. Images of my mother flashed in and out of my mind, but I quickly blocked them out. It was something that I didn’t even want to imagine her doing, not even in the slightest.
From the time I got to the back door, it was just a waiting game. I sat down, passing the time by scrolling through pictures on my phone of family members and friends. It felt as if not long ago, everybody was still alive and well. The picture of Big Mama, Junie, and Vinny was my favorite. They stood, one on each side of her, like they were her sons. I couldn’t even imagine how things would have been for us right now if he was still alive. Would we be doing shows in LA or New York as we thought or would we just be some average entertainers with local fame? Just then, I heard the front door open up and footsteps entered soon after. I shoved my phone into my pocket and peeked through the back window. The window went straight into a room where all the money was kept. I propped the window open and waited for somebody to come in. Moments later, Nas showed up. He was a little slimmer than he was the last time I saw him but for the most part, he looked the same. He went to the area that we used to keep the money and, as he wasn’t looking, I hopped in unnoticed. He was bent over, reaching inside a hole in the wall that was covered up with a painting. Before I could get to him, the barrel of a gun was pressed into the back of my head. “Lyric,” Nas said without turning around, “I’m glad you made it. Have a seat.”
The guy behind me took the gun out of my hand and pushed me against the wall. When I spun around, I saw it was Man-Man. “What’s wrong, Lyric? Don't you know how to speak to an old friend? Man-man was yo’ nigga at one point, wasn’t he? You don’t want to say nothing to him?” I remained silent as Nas pulled money out of the bag and began counting it. “Yo, you remember when we used to do this, baby? Just going from house to house collecting thousands and thousands of dollars and then giving you some money to go shopping to get whatever you wanted. Damn,” he said, smiling to himself, “those were the good days. You know, the time before you started flippin’ out and all that. Up until then, shit was going good, don’t you think?” I kept my lock-lipped glare shining on my face. I knew I was going to get caught up. I went in stupidly, not even thinking about him having other guys with him or anything. Things like this happen when you jump the gun, and it was completely out of character for me, but it is what it is.
“Baby, you don’t want to talk? I mean, you and that other bitch were running around here, stealing my money and shit trying to draw me out. Now that I’m out, you don’t have shit to say? Come on now, talk to yo’ man. What’s up?”
He put the money back in the bag and tossed it to Man-Man’s feet as he stood there with his pistol steadily on me. Nas looked at him and smiled, “Go ahead and talk a walk, fam. I got this.” Man-Man grabbed the sack and walked out of the room as Nas shut the door behind him. “Now,” he said, glaring directly at me, “we’re alone. You got some shit you need to get off your chest?”
“You poisoned me.”
“Poisoned you?”
“Did I stutter?”
He rubbed his hands onto his chin,
“Oh, you talking about the HIV shit? Well, yeah, I kinda got that when I was in jail and shit. You know how that go, niggas be in for a minute, and the only thing to do in there to get off is to fuck a nigga that thinks he’s a bitch. Well, I fucked a nigga who had the germ, and since we were at odds, I fucked you when you came in. I mean, I feel you though because the nigga that gave it to me? He died as soon as I found out I had it, so you? I completely understand why you’re pissed.”
When he spoke, I thought back to Malley. She said she had the virus, but if he just got it in jail, then it didn’t make sense for her to say she had gotten it from him. One of them was lying, and if I had to guess, it wouldn’t be her.
“Bullshit.”
“Excuse me.”
“You had that shit for a minute, don’t fucking lie to me.”
“Nah. I mean, one thing about me is I don’t mind admitting when I fucked up or did some dirty shit. I’m man enough to say it, but this is not some shit I’ve had for a long ass time. Shit, don’t you die from that shit after long?”
“Whatever.”
“Does Prince have it?”
“Fuck you.”
“Bitch, does Prince have it? Dumb ass. If Prince doesn’t have it but we both had it back then, then he would have it, too.”
I thought about that for a minute, and he was right. Even the counselors were shocked when his tests came back negative and what he was telling me was starting to make more sense. But what the fuck is up with Malley then? I thought to myself.
“Does Prince have it?!”
“Nah.”
“Aight then. But how is Prince doing anyway? You know, it’s fucked up that you’re keeping my son from me.”
“You wanted us dead anyway.”
He laughed, “Shit, I did? Well, honestly, I just wanted you dead. I was going to send Prince out of the city, but you? Your hard-headed ass was the reason he got kidnapped anyway. If you would have left like I told you to, then none of this shit would’ve happened.”
“Listen, I didn’t come here for no counseling session, aight?”
“Right. You… you came to kill me. Really?” He laughed at the thought of it. “Kill me then, Lyric. I’m here; you’re there. Just fuckin’ kill me and get it over with. Oh wait, my bad, your dumb ass doesn’t even have a gun anymore. What a fuckin’ joke. That HIV got yo’ fuckin’ brains fried up and shit.”
Just then, there was a knock on the door, and he smiled, “Right on time. I love a bitch that is right on time! Come in.” The door opened, and she walked into the room, her red hair was bright like the end of a match. She switched back and forth on her way over to Nas. “Are you fuckin’ kiddin’ me?” I couldn’t stop myself from saying. Malley walked past me and stood next to Nas as he laughed out loud, “And THIS is how you play the game. THIS is why I am the fucking king of this city, and you are a bottom bitch. Do you think I didn’t know? I mean, all the money y’all stole over this last week went back to me. Well, the cut she took went back to me, but for obvious reasons I couldn’t get yours.”
“Malley? What the fuck!”
“What you mean, bitch? Look, I told you, me and Nas used to talk and when I found out you knew him and used to fuck with him? AND had a kid with him on top of all that? It pissed me the fuck off, but I knew you would lead me back to him, and this nigga here,” she leaned over and kissed him on the lips, “this was my first love and you know what they say about first loves, don’t you? If they come back to you, then it was meant to be.”
“Except if your name is Junie,” Nas said as he laughed out loud again.
“Fuck both of y’all. Fuck both of y’all!” I said as I stood up.
Malley pulled out her pistol, the desert eagle I bought with my money, and aimed it right back into my face. “You might wanna calm your little sick ass down,” she pretended to cough. “I don’t know how you didn’t put that shit together. How the fuck am I gonna get HIV from this nigga, he gives it to you, and on top of all that, Prince doesn’t have it? Come on now, Lyric! Quandra spoke so highly of you, too. I wanted to see how smart you were for myself, and I must say, I am fucking disappointed! Fucking disappointed!”
I clenched my fists together and lowered my head. So, this is how it was going to end for me. Dead inside of a drug house just like my Uncle Stew. Gone too soon just like my Mother. I couldn’t come to grips with it, and suddenly, tears fell out of my eyes.
“This bitch crying?” Malley said, “damn!”
“Well? I guess this shit is over. Bow to the king and queen, bitch.”
Nas raised Malley’s gun and pointed it in my direction. For a split second, I heard every warning Big Mama sent to me. Her voice pierced through my heart like lightning pierces through clouds in the middle of a rainstorm. Prince grew from a one-year-old to fully grown in the twinkle of an eye. He made it to college and got his bachelor’s in sports medicine. He wasn’t the best basketball player, but he knew how to help others perform to their highest potential. Stacey remarried, and Serena finally had a few children of her own for Stacey and her new husband to spoil. Life was good, and everybody ended up all right without me around, and as long as I had that glimpse of them before I died, that was all that mattered. Four shots rang out of the pistols and darkness swept over me faster than anything I’d ever experienced before.
I immediately fell to the ground once I felt the shot pierce through my side. The other three shots were fired, and none of them hit me, but moments later, a door slammed open and more shots were fired. I put my hand on my side, and I hadn’t felt anything this excruciating since childbirth. More shots rang out in the front of the house as I laid on the ground. My eyes focused in front of me, and I saw it as clear as day, Nas and Malley both laid out on the ground with blood pouring from their bodies. Momentarily, my mind was clear of the pain as I tried to put together what the fuck was going on around me. Just then, I felt someone pull on my arm, “Come on, Lyric! Get up!” More footsteps ran inside the room and looked over at Nas and Malley’s dead bodies. “Lyric,” Quandra said, “this one is for you.” With that, she unloaded the rest of her clip right into Nas’s head, and I was scooped up from the ground by the person that was behind me. “Come on, Block,” she said, “Let’s go!” He brought me out of the house and put me in their truck and moments later, I blacked out.
