A Constant Love: A Pride & Prejudice Continuation, page 22
“No,” Georgiana said, looking startled. “No, he has not.”
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Only after Elizabeth had left to acquaint the rest of the household of the news could Georgiana turn her full attention to her sister’s statement that Lord Alfred had not broken her heart. Elizabeth was right – she had felt betrayal, most of all, upon hearing the news in the letter, but at no point had she felt jealousy over this Miss Foster, that she should be the one marrying Lord Alfred. At no point had she despaired over never receiving his attentions again.
Once she had affirmed such a conclusion, she turned her mind to why this was, and from there it was only a little while before she arrived at the truth: Lord Alfred could not break her heart, because she was in love with Captain Stanton. It hit her with the same overwhelming shock that his holding her close had; it rushed up past her and she understood that she had been in this state for some time, but had not allowed herself to admit it. It was not a childish infatuation with a new, handsome acquaintance; her affections were far deeper than what she had ever felt for Mr. Wickham, or even Lord Alfred.
She spent some time merely sitting there, adjusting to her realisation: she was in love; she was in love with Captain Stanton. Such thoughts were eventually followed, however, with the consideration that little would come of it unless he was also in love with her, and she had no notion of whether he was. He often sought her conversation, but he was not nearly so particular in his attentions as Lord Alfred had been. She had not been so, either, however, she was forced to admit. Perhaps he was as cautious with his heart as she was with hers, and now that she had realised her own love, she would have to take care to indicate it to him. The thought of this filled her with terror; she had no idea how to go about anything resembling a flirtation.
She went down to dinner occupied with these thoughts, and was unprepared for such expressions of concern and sympathy as her family gave her. They felt sorry for her; they all agreed Lord Alfred had behaved outrageously, to have so obviously courted her and then immediately become engaged to another – while in mourning, no less. Georgiana listened to them with lingering unease, reminded again of how deceived she had been. Even if she was able to indicate where her heart lay, to Captain Stanton, how was she to ensure that he would not deceive her, as well? Everything about him indicated that he was a most upstanding gentleman, that he was not a man who would do such a thing, but she would have said the same thing about Lord Alfred, before all this had happened.
Elizabeth, after breaking the news of Lord Alfred’s engagement to Georgiana, had informed Mary, Catherine, and Mrs. Annesley, and then written two letters. The first was an express to her husband, informing him of the news. She had told him she did not see any reason for him to curtail his time at Pemberley, as Georgiana was taking the news fairly well, but she had thought he would want to know. The second was a note to Colonel Fitzwilliam, to be delivered to the Fitzwilliams’s town house by servant. As Georgiana’s other guardian, she thought it right that he be informed, as well, and she also hoped that perhaps as a second son himself, he might be able to provide Georgiana with some perspective. She had invited him to dinner, or perhaps tea, if by chance he was free for either. He had penned back a note expressing his concern and telling her that he was engaged to dine with a colleague at White’s shortly, but would see if he could come by for tea later.
He did come, and was announced by Mr. Miller, to the surprise of everyone else in the household. Elizabeth poured him a dish of tea, and quietly thanked him for having come as she handed it to him.
“I was very sorry to hear of your disappointing news today, Georgiana,” he said. “Particularly when combined with your injury. This must have been a very trying week for you.”
“No, it has not been my greatest week,” she admitted. “I cannot believe I was so deceived.”
“We were all deceived by him, Georgiana,” Elizabeth reminded her.
“Indeed, my mother seemed certain he would make an offer soon,” Colonel Fitzwilliam said. “Perhaps he would have, if his brother had not been killed.”
“And I might have accepted him,” Georgiana said. “I might have married a man who was only pretending to care for me.”
“I would not say that,” Colonel Fitzwilliam said. “I do believe he enjoyed your company, and that he did have some affection for you, although it must not have been so deep as what he felt for Miss Foster. We younger sons are not able to marry whomever we choose.”
“But you cannot deny that he would have had no interest in me, without my fortune.”
“No, that I cannot deny. But I do think you could have been very happy together. I think you could have had a very good marriage.” Colonel Fitzwilliam said. He saw no need to tell her that it was possible in such a marriage that some of Georgiana’s money would be used to set up Miss Foster as Alfred Mallory’s mistress somewhere.
“Perhaps you are right.” Georgiana thought it would be unkind to state that she hoped for something more in marriage; she hoped for love, not simply affection combined with a need for thirty thousand pounds. She hoped for what Edward would have to be exceedingly lucky to achieve himself, to find and fall in love with a lady whose fortune was compatible with his situation. She let the subject flag, therefore, and eventually the group moved on to other, more pleasant topics.
Chapter 31
Georgiana made it immediately clear during breakfast on Saturday that she would not hear of staying home from the sailing outing. Everyone involved was aware of her injury; she would wear her sling as directed, but she could not possibly bear to miss it. They all agreed she should not, and thought she certainly deserved something to cheer her spirits after the events of the week.
Mrs. Annesley cleverly sewed one of her shawls to the sling, so that it would not be visible to casual eyes, and, wearing them both over her pelisse, she got into the carriage with the rest of the party. Any diversion that got her out of the house after staying in the previous day would have been refreshing, but her anticipation for this particular event was so great that she found her stomach churning as they made the drive down to the river. She must find a way to indicate her feelings to Captain Stanton, and as they travelled, she fixed upon a plan – she would observe Catherine in her interactions with Captain Ramsey, for although Catherine was by no means a flirt, she certainly had made her affections clear enough, and there must be things that Georgiana could learn by watching her more closely.
The carriage left them quayside, where both captains were standing, together with another colleague of theirs, a pleasant-looking man of average height, wearing a slightly different uniform jacket than those of Captains Stanton and Ramsey, which Catherine quietly explained as due to his being a Commander, and lower in rank than the other men, who were Post Captains, although all were given the title of Captain in address. They approached, and asked if they could be introduced.
“This is Captain Shaw, who has been so good as to lend us the use of his cutter,” Captain Ramsey said. “Captain Shaw, this is Mrs. Darcy, Miss Darcy, Miss Bennet, Miss Catherine Bennet, and Mrs. Annesley.”
“I am pleased to make your acquaintance, ladies,” Captain Shaw said.
“We cannot thank you too much for your kindness,” Elizabeth said. “None of us have been sailing, and we are very much looking forward to it.”
“It is nothing,” Captain Shaw said. “I can certainly spare it for the day. I wish I was able to go with you – you have a fine breeze and should have quite a nice trip. However, I cannot complain about missing a day of leisure, when so many of my colleagues are on shore and I am still fully employed. I must leave you now, but I hope you will enjoy your outing.”
They all said goodbye, indicating their gratitude, and then Captains Stanton and Ramsey told them they should go up the quay, to a boat with two masts. It was not nearly so large as many of the other ships they saw out on the river, but still more than large enough to hold them all comfortably. It was well below the side of the quay, so that they should all have to step down into it, and Captain Ramsey did so first, the boat rocking slightly as he did so.
“You will all have to mind your step carefully,” he said. “Do we have any volunteers to go first?”
“I will!” Catherine said, walking over to the edge of the quay.
Captain Stanton was standing there, to assist her down, but before he could so much as take her arm, Catherine had jumped down into Captain Ramsey’s arms, the boat rocking violently as she did so, but neither of them very concerned about its doing so. Georgiana watched Catherine give him a broad smile, watched the way Kitty held his eyes as she did so, and the way her hands lingered on his arms until Captain Ramsey asked her to sit on the other end of the boat, to help stabilise it.
Elizabeth, Mary, and Mrs. Annesley were all far more careful in their descent, requiring Captain Stanton to take their arms and assist them down to Captain Ramsey. Georgiana waited so that she could be the last, trying to work up the nerve to mimic at least some of Catherine’s actions. When she finally walked up to Captain Stanton, though, she felt the import of the moment so deeply that she could hardly meet his eyes.
“How is your wrist, Miss Darcy?” he asked.
“I have been required to wear a sling until it is better,” she said, moving her shawl slightly with her good hand so that he might see how it had been concealed.
“Ah, very clever,” he said. “And I am so glad you have been able to join us.”
“I am too. I would not have missed this for anything.”
“Now, let us make sure you get into the boat safely,” he said, then, to Captain Ramsey: “Be sure to mind her wrist.”
Georgiana had expected him to take her arm, as he had all the others except Catherine, she had thought perhaps she might be able to attempt some sort of lingering touch as Catherine had done to Captain Ramsey. Instead, however, she found his hands on her waist, picking her up entirely and then lowering her down into the boat, where Captain Ramsey helped her settle. She told herself it had been the most expedient, the safest way to do things, and yet she still required a few moments to regain her breath, so unexpected and so delightful his touch had been.
Captain Ramsey indicated where she should sit, an open bench just behind Elizabeth, as Captain Stanton stepped down into the boat. The captains then entered into a period of busyness, sometimes thinking to explain what they were doing to the ladies, but more focused on ensuring they raised a sail up on one of the masts and then got the boat untied from the quay. Captain Stanton stepped to the rear of the boat, then, and put his hand on a long wooden handle he explained to be the tiller, which he would use to steer. Captain Ramsey, in the middle of the boat, gave them a tremendous push off of the quay; Captain Stanton tightened some of the ropes on the sail, and it caught the wind, sending them into motion.
For Georgiana, all other thoughts – even those of Captain Stanton – were quite driven from her mind in those first few magic minutes under sail. The boat glided along the river with an effortlessness that was like nothing she had ever felt. In a carriage, even riding Grace, there was always a feeling that work was going into movement, but here there was nothing except the breeze on her face and the slight sound of water moving under the boat.
The river was crowded with other boats, and it was clear Captain Stanton needed all of his concentration to mind the tiller and the sail. After Captain Ramsey had raised the other sail from the mast in the front of the boat, however, he set about teaching them what was happening.
“Can you feel which direction the wind is coming from?” he asked, holding up a hand in the wind and indicating they should do the same.
“That way!” Catherine said, with a look of intense concentration on her face, pointing up the river.
“Yes, exactly, from the west,” Captain Ramsey said, smiling at her. “But we mean to go west, which is a problem because the boat cannot sail straight into the wind. We would go nowhere – we might even be blown backwards!”
The expression on his face was so animated they all laughed, and then he continued: “We are able to sail at angles to the wind, however, so what we are going to do is make our way back and forth across the river, but also make some progress up the river at the same time. This way when we have to return home, we will have an easier time of it – we can let the wind push us. So have no worry about our not being able to return back here.”
“Ready to tack, sir?” Captain Stanton asked, in a voice far louder than they were accustomed to hearing from him, and delaying any further explanation.
“Ready, sir,” Captain Ramsey said.
“Helm’s a-lee,” Captain Stanton called out, pushing the tiller and causing the boat to turn sharply. At the same time he did this, they both adjusted the sails so that they were angled differently when the boat completed its turn, and they were gliding across the river, further down from the quay where they had begun.
“We call it a tack when we turn the front of the boat through the oncoming wind,” Captain Ramsey said. “When we keep tacking up into the direction of the wind, as we are now, we call that beating up.”
His explanations continued on in this same manner as they continued to weave their way up the river, and Georgiana noticed that whenever he would be silent for any length of time, Catherine was always asking him a question about what this part of the boat or that was, or asking what he was doing with the sails. Eventually, Kitty even asked if she might help, and Captain Ramsey enlisted her to pull on one of the ropes – sheets, he called them – when they tacked in one direction, and to loosen it when they tacked in the other. Catherine did her new duty with the keenest attention and constant smiles to Captain Ramsey; it was clear to anyone in the boat that she was as delighted as any young lady could possibly be, and that Captain Ramsey formed a large part of her delight.
Georgiana watched them for a while, then turned her attention to Captain Stanton at the back of the boat. The traffic on the river had begun to lighten, where they were, but he still focused very intently on all that was happening around him, and Georgiana did not wish to distract him by saying anything. Eventually, though, he looked up and caught that her attention was on him, and offered her a smile, which she returned fully, feeling that it was a little thing, but at least a small step in beginning to show her affection.
They made their way along the river far enough that the city began to thin out on either side, and they saw more people out for pleasure sails, as they were. They had also left the busy quays behind, and Captain Stanton steered the boat directly toward the shore, where he and Captain Ramsey jumped out, to pull the boat up onto the grass. They were all then invited to get out and stretch their legs a bit, and take some refreshments. Captain Stanton pulled a large basket and two blankets from the boat, and made up a little picnic for them, while Captain Ramsey saw that the boat was tied to a tree some way up the bank.
Georgiana found the sensation of walking on dry land to be strange after sitting in the boat for so long. She had become a little accustomed to the feel of the water underneath her, and now it was strangely gone. All the ladies agreed that it was all very handsomely done; it was quite peaceful here, by the water, and they had been growing a bit hungry. Georgiana sat down with Elizabeth and Mrs. Annesley, ensuring there was ample space beside her, and then doing her best to look up at Captain Stanton and invite him with her eyes to sit beside her. Whether she was successful or whether he simply wanted to do so of his own accord she could not tell, but he did sit beside her, offering them all wine and such delicacies as the basket had to offer. There was quite a lot of food, and all of it very good; Georgiana assumed it to have been prepared by the Earl of Anglesey’s kitchen.
“So how do you find you like sailing, Miss Darcy?” he asked her, when they had all settled into eating.
“Oh, I quite love it!” she said, overcome with enthusiasm and not thinking for the moment about any means of showing affection. “I must admit, I had always wondered how you are able to sail wherever you are needed, regardless of the direction of the wind. Now that Captain Ramsey has explained how we kept tacking to get here, I feel I understand.”
“Ah, you do understand! The difference is that in a large square-rigged ship, it is a much larger undertaking to tack,” he said, taking three Naples biscuits and placing them on his plate to act as sails, in order to further his explanation. “You see, if the wind is coming in this direction, we must swing the front of the ship all the way through the oncoming wind, so that we might catch the wind again, here. If the ship is not going fast enough, it will get stuck where there is no wind to propel it, and then it is very difficult to get it moving again. We call that missing stays. So if the conditions are not optimal, we may wear ship instead, coming around like this in a wider turn. It takes longer, but it is safer.”
“If one commands a crack frigate like the Caroline, same crew for five years straight, trained as well as ever they can be trained, however, tacking is not quite so substantial an undertaking as Captain Stanton makes it out to be,” Captain Ramsey said loudly, from his seat beside Catherine on the other blanket. “I am surprised he even remembers what it means to miss stays.”
They all laughed, to hear Captain Ramsey tease his friend, and Captain Stanton took it good-heartedly. Georgiana, determined to show her interest by asking questions if she could, asked him what Captain Ramsey meant by a crack frigate.
“It is a term we use for a ship that can execute all of the things it needs to execute quickly, and well,” Captain Stanton said, in a tone of some embarrassment. “Taking in or letting out the sails quickly, tacking without ever missing stays, and, most importantly in my opinion, being able to fire three broadsides in less than five minutes.”
“And the Caroline could do all of these things?”
“Yes, but as Captain Ramsey notes, I had quite a lot of time to train them to do so. Many captains are not so fortunate to have the same ship for so long as I did.”
