Fizz!!!

Fizz!!!

Simon Haynes

Science Fiction & Fantasy / Young Adult / Children's Books

Welcome to a future where long-distance travel involves nothing more than stepping into a booth. Unfortunately, for one man this tiny step is a giant barrier ...Welcome to a future where long-distance travel involves nothing more than stepping into a booth. Unfortunately, for one man this tiny step is a giant barrier ... Martin stared in wonder at the mirrored surface suspended between the chrome arches. They were the teleporters! He'd imagined something more robust, more ... sci-fi. He felt a weight lift from his shoulders, a tight knot unfurling in his stomach. After all his worries, it looked as safe as crossing the road.Tell that to a hit and run victim, said a tiny voice inside his skull. But it sounded plaintive now, lacking the wisdom and authority which had plagued him every night for the past week.A 2000-word short story from the author of the Hal Spacejock series
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Hal Junior 1: The Secret Signal

Hal Junior 1: The Secret Signal

Simon Haynes

Science Fiction & Fantasy / Young Adult / Children's Books

Hal Junior lives aboard a futuristic space station. His mum is chief scientist, his dad cleans air filters and his best mate is Stephen 'Stinky' Binn.As for Hal ... he's a bit of a trouble magnet. He means well, but his wild schemes and crazy plans never turn out as expected!Hal Junior: The Secret Signal features mayhem and laughs, daring and intrigue ... plus a home-made space cannon!Hal Junior lives aboard a futuristic space station. His mum is chief scientist, his dad cleans air filters and his best mate is Stephen 'Stinky' Binn. As for Hal ... he's a bit of a trouble magnet. He means well, but his wild schemes and crazy plans never turn out as expected!Hal Junior: The Secret Signal features mayhem and laughs, daring and intrigue ... plus a home-made space cannon!The Secret Signal will appeal to readers with a sense of humour and a taste for adventure.No swearing and no adult concepts ... just good clean fun.
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Hal Spacejock

Hal Spacejock

Simon Haynes

Science Fiction & Fantasy / Young Adult / Children's Books

Hal's an upright sort of guy, and he won't take jobs from gun runners, drug smugglers or politicians. On the other hand, the finance company's brutal enforcer is on his doorstep, and Hal has barely twenty-four hours to pay him off. Miss the deadline and he - and his ship - will go under. Way, way, under.Faced with an impossible choice, Hal chooses an impossible job ...An incompetent space pilot, a massive debt and a twenty-four hour deadline...Freighter pilot Hal Spacejock has a life to die for: His very own cargo ship, a witty and intelligent flight computer ... and a debt so big it makes the GFC look like a rounding error.Hal's an upright sort of guy, and he won't take jobs from gun runners, drug smugglers or politicians. On the other hand, the finance company's brutal enforcer is on his doorstep, and Hal has barely twenty-four hours to pay him off. Miss the deadline and he - and his ship - will go under. Way, way, under.Faced with an impossible choice, Hal chooses an impossible job ... and gains an impossible new co-pilot into the bargain.(Also available in French)
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Loss Leader

Loss Leader

Simon Haynes

Science Fiction & Fantasy / Young Adult / Children's Books

After many delays and last-minute setbacks, the first colony ship leaves planet Earth for a distant star. Join the crew as they discover all is not as it seems...Originally published in Andromeda Spaceways #3After many delays and last-minute setbacks, the first colony ship leaves planet Earth for a distant star.Join the crew as they discover all is not as it seems...Originally published in Andromeda Spaceways #3"... pure science fiction and, just between ourselves, an entirely evil tale, suggesting a far more likely approach to Earth colonizing the universe than I have seen in a long time." Australian Spec Fic in Focus
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Sleight of Hand

Sleight of Hand

Simon Haynes

Science Fiction & Fantasy / Young Adult / Children's Books

After a cosy meal, the protagonist retires to his host's workshop for an after-dinner drink ... and becomes the unwitting subject of an experiment.Trivia: Sleight of Hand won the 2001 Aurealis Award for Horror.After a cosy meal, the protagonist retires to his host's workshop for an after-dinner drink ... and becomes the unwitting subject of an experiment.Trivia: Sleight of Hand won the 2001 Aurealis Award for Horror.--'The other day I began to consider the practical benefits of sending matter as an attachment.''Matter?'Ralph rapped his knuckles on the benchtop. 'Objects.'My eyebrows rose. 'You want to email a piece of wood?' We'd managed a bottle of wine between us over the apricot chicken, but I didn't think he was that far gone.
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The Project

The Project

Simon Haynes

Science Fiction & Fantasy / Young Adult / Children's Books

Two scientists pull an all-nighter, desperate to complete their work before the project is terminated.Two scientists pull an all-nighter, desperate to complete their work before the project is terminated.Garrett was just reaching for the keyboard when the office door flew open and Harris burst in."I've got something!" shouted the scientist, his face flushed. "Quick. Come and see!"Garrett jumped up and ran for the door. Harris was already half-way down the corridor, running flat-out with his white lab coat flapping behind him like a sail in a hurricane.A 2000-word short story by Simon Haynes, author of the Hal Spacejock series.
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No Reply

No Reply

Simon Haynes

Science Fiction & Fantasy / Young Adult / Children's Books

Ben Hammond runs Wierd and Wild, a nightly radio show. There's $50,000 to be won, a prize for the first caller who can prove they had a UFO encounter. So far, the money has never been claimed ...Ben Hammond runs Wierd and Wild, a nightly radio show. There's $50,000 to be won, a prize for the first caller who can prove they had a UFO encounter. So far, the money has never been claimed ..."This is Ben Hammond bringing you Wierd and Wild, the all-night show which has everyone talking." Hammond caught his producer's expression, and gritted his teeth. Never mind the station's polling, he knew there was a big audience out there every night. "We're chatting to Danny Rye about night lights. So Danny, tell us what happened next." "Sure, Mr Hammond. Me and my brother were walkin' along the railroad tracks past the old factory. It was late at night. I know because we could hear owls and stuff." "The dark would have been a clue." "Eh?" "Go on, go on." "Well, there was this light, low and coming up fast. We jumped out the way and it roared past. When we stood up again it was gone." "Most interesting." "Do I get the prize?" "No, you don't get the prize. That was the weakest UFO story I've heard in my entire six years at this station."
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Yard Fail

Yard Fail

Simon Haynes

Science Fiction & Fantasy / Young Adult / Children's Books

When Ralph Swindon tinkers in his workshop, the whole world holds its breath ...A 2700-word short story.Trivia: Features the characters from Sleight of Hand.When Ralph Swindon tinkers in his workshop, the whole world holds its breath ...A 2700-word short story.Trivia: Features the characters from Sleight of Hand.--I was rinsing my hair when Jenny hammered on the door, yelling something about an accident at Ralph's place. Despite the hot water I felt a sudden chill."Is he okay?" I yelled.No reply.I killed the taps, shoved the clingy curtain aside and stumbled from the shower. Half blinded, I slipped and groped around the bathroom until I found the towel. I wiped the soap from my face, wrapped the towel round my waist and ran for the hall. I know the kind of things Ralph messes with in that workshop of his, and an 'accident' could have levelled the street.
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A Portion of Dragon and Chips

A Portion of Dragon and Chips

Simon Haynes

Science Fiction & Fantasy / Young Adult / Children's Books

Welcome to the Old Kingdom! It's a wonderful time to visit! There's lots to do and plenty to see! Participate* in a public execution! Wave a pathetic little sword at the Queen's Champion! (With luck**, become the new queen's champion!) Practice real magic***, in public! Make fun of the Halfling**** and experience excruciating pain! What are you waiting for? Dive into the Old Kingdom right now! ***** Clunk, an elderly robot, just did exactly that. He plunges into the sea off the coast of the Old Kingdom, and if he knew what was coming next he'd have sat down on the ocean floor and waited for rescue. Dragged from the ocean, coughing up seaweed, salty water and stray pieces of jellyfish, he's taken to the nearby city of Chatter's Reach, where he's given a sword and told to fight the Queen's Champion, Sur Loyne. As if that wasn't bad enough, the Old Kingdom still thinks the wheel is a...
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Catch of the Day

Catch of the Day

Simon Haynes

Science Fiction & Fantasy / Young Adult / Children's Books

Ken and Steve reluctantly give up their lawnmowing duties for a weekend of fishing, booze and male bonding. Unfortunately the fish aren't biting, supplies are running low and worst of all ... the beer just ran out.Then, without warning, an alien colony ship arrives in orbit, and that's when Ken's problems REALLY start.A 4000 word short story by the author of the Hal Spacejock series.'Potatoes to Gold' is a short story set in the late 1890s, during the West Australian gold rush, and offers an insight into the living conditions that outback pioneering families endured. The story is told from the perspective of a bright, young girl, Cathleen Sophia, who reveals her love of the outback and her devotion to her grandmother, Bridget. And her fear of having to leave them both. Throughout this piece of historical fiction, Bridget's story is also revealed which tells of an Irish girl who is sent to Australia at the age of twelve and spends the remainder of her life adapting to the loss and hardship her new home presents. Her joy and hope and reason for living lie in her granddaughter, Cathleen Sophia, but what happens when inevitable circumstances force yet another change.'Potatoes to Gold' is inspired by the author's great great-grandmother who was sent to Australia from Ireland at the age of twelve. She died in 1898 in Cue, Western Australia.
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Billy's Book

Billy's Book

Simon Haynes

Science Fiction & Fantasy / Young Adult / Children's Books

Billy Crump is the local stable boy. Fed up with mucking out horses, he sneaks into the wizard's lab, concocts a potion using all the rare and expensive ingredients, and somehow ends up with a talking book. His first thought? Sell the book ... and say goodbye to horse muck forever!A 5000 word fantasy/comedy storyBilly Crump is the local stable boy. Fed up with mucking out horses, he sneaks into the wizard's lab, concocts a potion using all the rare and expensive ingredients, and somehow ends up with a talking book. His first thought? Sell the book ... and say goodbye to horse muck forever!A 5000 word fantasy/comedy story--"Who's there? What's talkin'?"The book fluttered. "Who do you think, you two-legged disaster zone?""A talkin' book?" Emotions ran over Billy's face like drops of food dye in a goldfish bowl. Surprise was followed by bafflement, bafflement by comprehension and comprehension by cunning. "I could sell you," he said under his breath. "I could sell you an' then I wouldn't have to muck out no more stables.""Sell me?" squeaked the book. "You don't even own me!"
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The Desolator

The Desolator

Simon Haynes

Science Fiction & Fantasy / Young Adult / Children's Books

Join Hurm, Runt and Father Mephistophiles as they struggle to save the hamlet of Yendour from a marauding dragon.Originally published in Andromeda Spaceways #6.Another Throw of the Dice is the story of a group of individuals from different corners of the world who take a chance on a new life, as aid workers, on an un-named Pacific Island in the 1980s. Morganti skilfully unmasks them, as, pitted against the vicissitudes of island life, the forces of nature and the sinister nuclear presence in the region, they wrestle with the ghosts of lives past, bond together, embrace new lives, forge new relationships, part, depart and finally reunite at another time, in another place. It is a story of love, loss, hope, forgiveness and acceptance, told with humour, sensitivity and style..Mary Clare Morganti has a vast vocabulary and she is not afraid to use it, nor does she shy away from the complex sentence, so her writing is nuanced and fluid. She knows, too, when to hold back and when to give full reign to her talent for description. Her characters are clearly, but lightly, drawn and they speak for themselves while the bush, the sea, the island sunsets and the ravaging cyclone are boldly and lavishly painted.'Another Throw of the Dice transported me to another country, with a fascinating company of fellow travellers. It made me laugh and it made me cry. It’s a damn good read'. (Travelstripe.com)
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Thonn Day

Thonn Day

Simon Haynes

Science Fiction & Fantasy / Young Adult / Children's Books

Synopsis: Magick is banned in Thonn's world, outlawed after greedy and power-hungry wizards almost destroyed the entire planet. So imagine his surprise when he spies Eddie de Elder performing Magick spells!A 2500 word Fantasy/Comedy storySynopsis: Magick is banned in Thonn's world, outlawed after greedy and power-hungry wizards almost destroyed the entire planet. So imagine his surprise when he spies Eddie de Elder performing Magick spells!A 2500 word Fantasy/Comedy story--Towards the top of the hill, Thonn passed a wall marking the end of the olive trees. Here the land was untouched - a tangle of bushes, summer grasses and a number of plants with long spiky leaves; leaves which the Wise Elders used for medicinal purposes at village gatherings. Actually, they were leaves which the Wise Elders used pretty well all the time, and the so-called Elders were no longer Wise but Wide-Eyed and Vacant. Thonn had sidled into a downwind position once, and if the smoke was half as strong when inhaled, it was little wonder the Elders sat there gazing into space with rapt expressions on their faces.
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Hal Spacejock: Visit

Hal Spacejock: Visit

Simon Haynes

Science Fiction & Fantasy / Young Adult / Children's Books

Hal and Clunk are stuck in port, forced to wait two whole days for their next cargo. Hal returns to the ship after a little shopping expedition and finds Clunk in a right old state. Break out the crayons and colouring sheets ... he's organised a school visit!Hal and Clunk, stars of the Hal Spacejock comedy series, feature in this brand new 5000-word short story. 'Visit' slots into the series any time after Hal Spacejock (book one), but can be read and enjoyed as a stand-alone.
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