The Ultimate Animal Joke Book

The Ultimate Animal Joke Book

Matthew Grant

Romance / M M Romance / Young Adult

Have a laugh with your family and friendsThis book is perfect to read to your family and friends whenever you want to have a laugh with them. The animal jokes however are also great to read at your own leisure!Whether you want to share jokes with your friends and family, or enjoy the jokes peacefully during your breaks, The Ultimate Animal Joke Book is a suitable candidate to add to your stock!The Ultimate Animal Joke BookHave a laugh with your family and friendsThis book is perfect to read to your family and friends whenever you want to have a laugh with them. The animal jokes however are also great to read at your own leisure!Receive the many benefits that developing a person sense of humour can bringAccording to research, encouraging a person to have a good sense of humour can help them grasp unconventional ideas and ways of thinking, help people not take themselves too serious, and make your pal enjoy the more playful aspects of life!Enjoy the many illustrations which complement the Animal JokesThere are many pictures which are not only fun to look at, but also compliment the jokes within this book. Have a laugh on the chipmunks behalf as he/she is getting the mickey told about them, or smile along with the happy whale!Here are some hilarious jokes within this e-bookQuestion: What’s the difference between a fish and a piano?Answer: You can’t tuna fish.Question: Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?Answer: It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.Client: “Do you have alligator shoes?”Storeperson: “Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?”Whether you want to share jokes with your friends and family, or enjoy the jokes peacefully during your breaks, The Ultimate Animal Joke Book is a suitable candidate to add to your collection :)!
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Like So Much Hot Air

Like So Much Hot Air

Kathleen Hayes

M M Romance / Poetry

When Jason learns that his seemingly normal accountant boyfriend is really cooking books for the mob he runs as fast and as far as he can. When he arrives in Albuquerque he never imagined he might find what he had always been looking for: true love.This story was written as a part of the Goodreads M/M Romance Group's 'Love is Always Write' event.The prompt was:Albuquerque during Balloon Week was insane- like Mardi Gras on laughing gas, I heard someone say. Easy to hide in the crowd. But how to get away? Once I left the festival grounds, my leg would slow me down.He was alone, trying to get his balloon off the ground. You needed at least two people to get one of these monsters in the air. Bad day, between pissed off and heartbroken written all over his face. He stared down at my leg, and I grabbed the edge of the basket for support. "Need some help?"He laughed, then looked behind me at the trail of bloody footprints I'd left. "Whoever you're running from, you just led them here, bud."I stared at the footprints, then up at him. He dropped the fuel gauge, reached out and lifted me into the basket like I was a sack of groceries. "Stay down before you fall down. I need six more minutes to get this balloon out of here. Have you got six minutes?"I shook my head. "I don't know."
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Jesse's Girl

Jesse's Girl

Alex Exley

Romance / M M Romance / LGBT / Gay

Jesse spends far more time fantasizing about girls than interacting with them in real life. When a girl in his chemistry class catches his imagination, he’s determined to do something about it. In between his schoolwork, hanging out with friends, and an unusual part-time job, he musters the courage to talk to her. But his newfound infatuation has a past he hadn’t counted on.“Jesse's Girl” is a mainstream story about Jesse, a college student who spends far more time fantasizing about girls than interacting with them in real life. When a girl in his chemistry class catches his imagination, he’s determined to do something about it. In between his schoolwork, hanging out with dorm buddies, and working a somewhat licentious part-time job, he musters up the courage to talk to her. But his newfound infatuation has a past he hadn’t counted on.Word count: 13,800.If you enjoy the quality of these stories and are interested in erotic fiction with similar quality writing and storylines, check out Alex Exley’s collection of short stories, “Tales of Love & Lust.” Select erotic stories also sold individually.Cover photo courtesy of Silvia at 0silvia0.deviantart.com
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Being the Bad Guy

Being the Bad Guy

Daniel Devine

Romance / M M Romance / Young Adult

Things haven't gone well for Chris lately. His girlfriend dumped him. He's been fighting with his friends. Is it time for a change? Or is it just time to focus on what he does best--being a super villain?Things haven't gone well for Chris lately. His girlfriend dumped him, and now every time they argue, he literally fears for his life.He's been fighting with his friends. They used to know how to party, but now everybody but him has gotten old. They all need to go home early because their wife is calling or they have to pick their kids up from the game. Nobody wants to take over the world anymore, or even cause some widespread panic.Is it time for a change? Or is it just time to focus on what he does best--being a super villain?
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A Singular Captain

A Singular Captain

John Regan

Romance / M M Romance / Anthologies

Mutiny, murder and mayhem on the first circumnavigation of the world. With the 500th anniversary of Ferdinand Magellan's great voyage coming up, this is a chance to see what it was really like. The dangers were not just from storm and tempest, risk of the unknown and mutinous crew but, even more insidious, the machinations of corrupt priests back home.It's 1518 and the Catholic Church is under attack from a man named Martin Luther while the Spanish Empire extends its bloodthirsty rule across the world against the wishes of arch-rival, Portugal. The Line of Demarcation divides the world between Portugal and Spain but no one knows on which side the fabulous Spice Isles lie; least of all the inhabitants of those islands. Only one man has the knowledge, experience, talent and determination to settle the question: Ferdinand Magellan, hated both in Spain and his native Portugal. Antonio Pigafetta, former ambassador of the Holy See to the royal court of imperial Spain, casts his lot with a captain set up to fail. Himself beset by religious conflict, Pigafetta has no idea what he is letting himself in for. Mutiny, murder, shipwreck, and wars of religion are only part of it but Pigafetta retains his humanity and loyally serves the Captain General to the end.
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The Stingray

The Stingray

josephcmangilaya

Romance / M M Romance

War erupted in the Spratly, between China and Philippines. Stingray is the most advanced flying boat of China that wreak havoc to her enemies, the Philippines and its ally, the United States. The craft can even sink the Aegis cruiser of the U.S., as boasted by China.Shannon and Ally love the fall when they can go to the cabin and have fun with their cousins at Thanksgiving. Their new dog Becca has fun too, swimming in the pond.
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Hit the Road, Jack

Hit the Road, Jack

Edua Erasmus

Adult Fiction / Erotica / Romance / M M Romance

A short story about hitting the open road and things that go with it.There’s something magic inside us all – and it’s trying to get out!The rules of chance, even physical laws, are breaking down. The time of magic is returning.And Bethlehem Jones finds she’s sharing her body with Lynese, an unpredictable water-sprite entrapped within one of her ancestors in an ancient war.Hell-bent on restarting that war, bigger, more powerful magical spirits are attempting to break free of their own human confinement. Can Beth use Lynese’s powers without relinquishing her own control? Or is untrustworthy Lynese her most dangerous foe of all?
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Free Kittens

Free Kittens

David McGhee

LGBT / Romance / M M Romance

What happens when a vampire falls for a person outside of the Twilight universe? Hurt and heartbreak follow Josh Hardy as Malcolm (vampire) sets his sights on making him the only person in Josh's life... And he does so with murderous abandon!Josh Hardy has enough troubles in his life without a murderous vampire being a part of his picture. Malcolm, the vampire, makes it his mission to rid Josh of all the bad influences in his life, making his once hedonistic lifestyle into a scary horror movie where his closest friends are being picked off one by one, just so Malcolm can have him all to himself.Free Kittens explores the mind of both a junkie who can't stop and a vampire who also can't help his vices.What is it to really be human? Is it love, sex, food, or something far more sinister?
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The Noble Mr. Prickles

The Noble Mr. Prickles

Ardy

Romance / M M Romance / Paranormal / Shapeshifters

Javan, a decorated general and military instructor, once swore an oath to his friend, King Orvan, that should he ever be needed he would answer the call. Now, Orvan is insane, taking advice only from his dog, and he has called Javan and his three best warriors to go on a suicidal mission to retrieve a magic orange petal from the Giant Kingdom, with only a chimpanzee named Mr. Prickles to aid them.King Orvan of Dargod has been cursed with insanity, passing all sorts of crazy laws and taking advice only from his dog. But when he calls for his oldest friend, a former general and military instructor, and his three best warriors to go on a mission to find a magic orange rose petal, they soon find out that this mission is not only legit, but is vital to the survival of their kingdom. On their way they encounter obstacles such as an insane wizard, drunken oafs and their hideous mother, zombies, enemy soldiers, and a giant princess who makes them into her living dolls, and their only hope seems to Mr. Prickles, the chimpanzee that King Orvan insisted that they take along.
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Wading with an Octopus

Wading with an Octopus

Charlie Richards

Romance / M M Romance / Fantasy / Paranormal

World of Aquatica: A day that starts like any other takes a sideways turn when a detective discovers that humans aren’t alone in the world. Over two weeks before, Detective Grisham Canton arrested the wrong guy—Solomon Lynch. It wasn’t the first time it’d happened and probably wouldn’t be the last. What made it stand out, however, was the stranger who’d been with Solomon. Grisham didn’t know his name, but the memory of his lean, sexy body, wide dark eyes, and distinctive black and red hair invaded his dreams. Waking with a hard-on was quickly getting old. Grisham heads to World of Aquatica, hoping to discover the identity of the stranger. When Grisham meets Cuzco Judson, the attraction is even more intense than his dreams. After a hot night with the man, Grisham learns a few secrets that turn his life upside down. Cuzco is an octopus shifter and believes Grisham is his mate. As Grisham is drawn into Cuzco’s world—where paranormals will do just about anything to keep their anonymity—will he be able to reconcile that the world isn’t black and white, right and wrong, or will the desire to walk away be too much temptation?
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Death is Only a Theoretical Concept

Death is Only a Theoretical Concept

S. K. Een

Fantasy / Paranormal / Romance / M M Romance

When Steve Nakamura is dared to seduce a vampire in return for his birthday present, he thinks it will be easy. Scrub up, find a hot undead girl, kiss her, earn enough money for a new car stereo. Simple. Abe Browning, however, is surely undead and just as surely not a girl, but that’s the last thing Steve needs to worry about when it comes to hooking up with vampires…Welcome to Port Carmila, population 15, 725. Half that count isn’t even human, and that’s not including feral zombies, ghouls and ghosts, mostly because they don’t stand still long enough for counting. It’s a melting pot of the living, the immortal, and the dead … where death means you still have to pay the rent, the merfolk are experts in tax evasion, everybody hates the corny Dead Centre of Australia T-shirts sold at the tourist information centre, and the local police encourage you to carry a weapon at all times, regardless of legality. Sometimes the zombies aren’t your much-loved next-door neighbours…When Steve Nakamura is dared—after a long-standing Port Carmila tradition—to seduce a vampire in return for his birthday present, he thinks it will be easy. Scrub up, find a hot undead girl who won’t care that he’ll start shambling the moment he stops breathing, kiss her, earn enough money for a new car stereo. Simple, if he doesn’t mind losing a little blood in the process. The cute and anxious Abe Browning, however, is surely undead and just as surely not a girl, and, as it turns out, that’s the last thing Steve needs to worry about when it comes to hooking up with vampires…
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Necrosis

Necrosis

Ardy

Romance / M M Romance / Paranormal / Shapeshifters

Andy Simon wakes up in excruciating pain, a pain for which there is no explaination. He then hears sirens from vehicles that aren't there. Then his wife kisses him gooodbye and begs him not to die on her, though she doesn't even seem to notice her own strange words. His day only gets weirder from there. Why does the pain persist? Why does his coffee taste like blood? What is happening to him?Andy Simon wakes up in excruciating pain, a pain for which there is no explaination. He then hears sirens from vehicles that aren't there. Then his wife kisses him gooodbye and begs him not to die on her, though she doesn't even seem to notice her own strange words. His day only gets weirder from there. Why does the pain persist? Why does his coffee taste like blood? Why is he the only one who seems to notice the torrential rainstorm he's driving in? And what does that car accident he keeps hearing about on the news have to do with it all?
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