Racing Heart, page 14
“Come on, I'll take you through to everyone else.”
The tears I’ve tried to hold back while I drove here, fall full force as we enter the waiting room. Braydon still has his arm wrapped around me, offering me comfort. The crew guys are sitting down, and Dave is standing at the window looking out. Braydon leads me over to the chairs, and we sit down together.
“What happened, Braydon?” I ask in a small voice. I’m too scared to even find out the truth. Maybe I’ll just stay in the dark.
“Well, you’re not going to believe this, and when Finn finds out, he’s going to be even more shocked. I was talking to Anderson, he stayed with him until the ambulance had got to him. He helped him, pulled the bike off and talked to him.”
“Well, thank god for Caleb, huh?”
“I don’t think Finn will see it that way.”
“No, I agree.”
Why did it have to happen to Finn?
I sit here silently, resting my head on Braydon’s shoulder, while we wait for news.
“Why are they taking so long?” Braydon asks out loud from the other side of the small room.
We’re all sitting here on pins, waiting for news. My knee bounces furiously in trepidation, and my nerves are shot to shit. Braydon is going to wear the tiles out at this rate with all his pacing. Dave, Finn’s manager, is sitting on his own in the opposite corner. Finn showed me the video of his dad’s crash a few nights ago, so I can see why they are so tense. It must be like déjà vu for them. The doctors have been in there with him for ages. I keep looking back, hoping the door will open at any minute, but it doesn’t.
“Braydon, why don’t you come and sit down? You’re making me nervous…”
“I’ve been here before Jordan; I can’t do this again.”
Tapping the seat beside me, Braydon looks up, and with a huff, he makes his way over. Patting his leg lightly, I try and reassure him, but I know it’s no use. He gives me a small smile, tapping his foot on the floor instead.
After another fifteen minutes of absolutely nothing from anyone, the door to Finn's room finally opens.
“Sorry to keep you all waiting.” The doctor walks from the room, slipping his hands into the pockets of his white coat. “He has a severe break in his right femur. We’ve done some scans to look for any injuries to his head. We were worried about him as he kept falling in and out of consciousness, but there’s nothing. Luckily, the helmet took the impact. He does have a rather long road to recovery though, I’m afraid.”
“How long, doc?” The shake in Braydon’s voice is evident.
“Anytime up to six months. We’re prepping him right now for surgery. I’m going to have to place a rod and a plate into his thigh. There was also some trauma to his spine, but thankfully, nothing is broken or fractured. So, it could just be shock. Sometimes the body shuts down to heal.”
“Will he ever ride again?” Braydon asks tearfully. I can’t ask anything. I can’t even find my voice right now.
“Honestly, that depends on his recovery and physiotherapy, also if he does as he’s told.”
Braydon covers his face with his hands, with Dave rubbing his back to settle him.
“Hey, boy, he’s alive, just be thankful, everything else will come later.”
Blowing a calming breath, Braydon removes his hands, wiping away the wetness from around his eyes, while nodding.
“Can we see him?”
“Just for a few minutes, I need to get him into the theatre. No more than two at a time though.”
The doctor stands aside while Braydon and Dave go in first. They’re only in the room for a couple of minutes, and Braydon is back at the doorway, calling me in.
I’m so anxious to see him, but I’m scared as well.
Sucking in a deep breath, I slowly move into the room. My shocked gaze falling on Finn, lying perfectly still in the bed. I stifle the gasp that leaves my lips with my hand because I don’t want to wake him up. Not that I probably will. A fresh bout of tears start, I let them fall as I approach him. Taking his warm fingers in mine, I lift them to my mouth, kissing them. Before placing them on my cheek and leaning into his hand, feeling his warmth against my skin.
“Oh, Finn What have you done, baby? I promise I’ll be right here when you come back.”
Hovering over him, I softly kiss his forehead, then his cheek.
“I love you,” I whisper against his skin and walk back to Braydon, leaning my head on his shoulder and crying it all out.
Once he’s given the surgeon the nod, the hospital porters wheel him from the room. While Braydon leads me back to the waiting room, sitting me down beside him. When I’ve calmed down a little, Braydon looks at me.
“I need to ring mom. Are you going to be okay for a couple of minutes?”
“Yeah, of course.” I sniff back my tears and try to man up.
Dave takes his place at my side giving me comfort. I feel like a right tit; I should be comforting them. Not them comforting someone who has only known him for five minutes. Right now, though, until he’s out of that theatre and talking to me again, my heart feels like there’s something missing.
For the first time ever, I feel heartbroken.
Chapter Thirty-Three
Finn
“Mr. Cooper.”
A soft beeping cuts into my subconscious and it’s annoying as fucking shit. All I want to do is sleep.
“Mr. Cooper…”
Who the fuck is that? The woman’s voice, that’s constantly calling my name in my ear, wakes me a little more, but I can’t open my eyes. I try to shift my leg; I must have laid on it funny though because it’s as stiff as a board.
“Mr. Cooper, are you with us?”
That voice needs to fuck off, it’s annoying as fuck. A sharp pain making me suck in a gasp, radiates through my thigh, bringing me out of my hypnotic state. Suddenly the last thing I remember is lying on the tarmac, with my bike crushing my leg. Starting to panic, I try to move it again, but I can’t.
“Okay, please don’t try to move.”
Forcing open my eyes, they flicker open, but the stark white walls are blinding me.
“Do you know where you are, Mr. Cooper?”
Squinting my eyes, I search the room, there’s a monitor at my side, that’s the bastard that woke me up. A TV is on the wall in front of me and a large window on the side. The woman standing by me is in a blue uniform dress; it definitely gives it away.
Fuck.
“Yeah.”
“Do you know what happened?”
“I flipped my bike.”
“You did. You’re very lucky, Mr. Cooper.”
“Call me Finn.”
“Finn. The doctor will be along shortly. Can I get you anything?”
Attempting to swallow is a feat in itself, my mouth feels like I’ve been licking a carpet, it’s that dry.
“Some water.”
“No problem, I’ll be back soon.”
As she leaves the room, my mind goes back to the track. I thought I was dead when my bike flipped. Then my thoughts go straight to Jordan, where is she? And Braydon, oh fuck, it’ll be like history repeating itself. Tapping at the side of me, I find the buzzer, pressing it. The door opens right away, and a middle-aged man in a white coat enters with a clipboard.
“Ah, it seems we have our very own Evel Knievel.”
Staring at him, I frown as he laughs at his own piss poor joke.
“Funny,” I grumble.
“How are we feeling, Mr. Cooper?”
“Shit. Sore. Like I’ve had almost two hundred pounds dropped on me.”
“You remember then?”
“Unfortunately.” I roll my eyes at him, but it hurts my head.
“Well, from your injuries, you’re lucky to be even walking. You have a broken femur. We’ve had to place a metal rod into the bone to help it heal.
Shit.
“You also dislocated your shoulder, but that’s not your biggest problem. We got that back in place, and with a bit of daily physio to help the ligament tighten back up, it’ll be right as rain.”
“Don’t mention rain.” Hearing that word, I have a clear picture in my head of the accident. “How long before I can ride again, doc?”
“It’s going to be a while I’m afraid, Mr. Cooper. If you ever want to get back on a Superbike again, you are going to have to do as you’re told. There’s going to be a lot of physical therapy.”
“How long?” I ask again, getting frustrated. I don’t want to hear his medical jargon; I just need to know how long it’s going to be before I can get back onto the track.
“A femoral shaft fracture can take anything around three to six months to heal. Then you’ve got physical therapy too.”
Closing my eyes, I wish myself away from here, like lying in bed with Jordan.
“Your family are outside, I’ll let them know you’re awake.”
“Just give me ten minutes?”
“Of course. Are you in any pain?”
“A little bit,” I admit.
He nods with a look of sympathy coating his eyes.
“I’ll get the nurse to bring you in some pain relief.”
“Thanks, Doc.”
“I’ll come back a little later, and I can give you more information on how we’re going to get you on the road to recovery.”
Nodding my answer, he turns away and leaves the room.
What the fuck am I going to do now? I can’t ride, I can’t even get out of this shitty bed. The nurse from before comes back in with a smile and hands me some pills and water.
“Your family are asking about you. Would you like me to send them in?”
“Yeah, okay.”
The door opens again and in place of the nurse, is a red, teary Jordan and a worried-looking Braydon. Jordan rushes to my bedside, her hands covering her open mouth, as she sniffs back more tears. With her hands on my shoulders, she puts her cheek against mine, her tears running between us, wetting my cheek.
“Hey. I’m okay. Stop crying.”
Pulling her head away, she looks at me, putting her lips to mine.
“You scared me.”
“Yeah, I scared myself, to be honest.”
Cupping her neck with my good hand, I tug her down until my forehead meets hers, and I kiss her again. Moving away, she drags a chair to my side and sits down, making room for my brother.
“Dude. Don’t ever do that to me again.”
“I’ll try not to,” I smirk.
I can feel my eyes beginning to close, it must be from the anesthesia and the extra painkillers I’ve taken, making me drowsy. With the two people that mean the most to me and my hand securely wrapped around Jordan’s, I close my eyes and drift away.
Chapter Thirty-Four
Jordan
As soon as the doctor said we could go in, I was up out of my chair, past the doctor, and slipping into his room. The sight of him though, was no less a shock than it was earlier on in the day before surgery. Only now, he’s up to his groin in a plaster cast and a sling on his arm. I know Braydon is behind me and he’s as apprehensive, if not more, than me, to see him.
As I sit here now, he’s drifted back off to sleep, with his hand firmly in mine. I feel like I can’t leave him again. I’m too scared to walk out of the door. I know I have to at some point, but for now, I’m going to sit here for as long as I can. Or until the nurse kicks me out.
“Did you speak to your mum?” I ask Braydon as he sits across from me, on the opposite side of the bed.
“Yeah, once I could stop her crying that is. She doesn’t watch Finn race on tv. After dad died, it was the one thing she refused to do, so this has hit her hard. She’s booking a flight and coming out here to see him in the next couple of days.”
“It’ll be good for you both to have your mum around.”
“Yeah, I miss her. I know I saw her a couple of weeks back, but it’s not the same.”
His love for his mum makes me smile. I don’t know what I’d do if I was halfway across the world and I couldn’t just see my mum when I felt like it… Although I’m usually too busy to even go around there and make a flying visit. I do feel guilty, and I really must make more of an effort. Lifting Finn’s hand and bringing it to my mouth, I settle my lips on his knuckles.
“What happened, Bray?”
“I have no idea, peaches.”
Another nickname to add to the few I seem to have, but funnily, I like it. I don’t interrupt. Instead, I let him go on.
“He was going great. I’m not sure if he hit a puddle or what. I just watched as he flung up into the air like a kind of stuntman, but he had no control, the bike landed on him. Seeing him lying there out on the tarmac like that brought back so many memories. It was like I was having a déjà vu moment.”
“Oh, Braydon.”
He shrugs, “Shit happens. He’s here, that’s all that matters.”
Hearing a vibration come from opposite me, I look up to see Braydon pulling his phone from his pocket. Once he’s read his text, he looks back to me.
“It was mom. She’s booked a flight for Thursday; hopefully he won’t be as groggy then as he is now.”
“Hopefully.” I agree.
The door opens, and Dave pops his head around.
“I’ve brought you both coffees.”
Getting up from his chair, Braydon meets Dave at the door and takes the flimsy vending cups from him. Dave follows him in and stands at my side.
“How’s he doing?” He cups my shoulder with his hand, giving me comfort.
“He’s just dozed back off.”
“Yeah, the nurse did say this would happen. Maybe you should go home and get some sleep. You look exhausted.”
“I am, but I don’t want to leave and have him wake up.”
Dave nods, leaving the conversation where it is, but a concerned expression still lines his face.
“I promise, when he wakes again, if I’m not kicked out by the nurse beforehand, I’ll go home.
“That’ll do me.”
I’ve been here hours; it must be close to the end of visiting time. I’m hungry, no… I’m starving. When I heard the crash on TV, I felt sick to my stomach. Not a scrap of food has passed my lips since breakfast time. On cue, my stomach rumbles, causing Braydon to look at me, frowning.
“Right you,” he stands and comes around to me, gently clutching my shoulders and tries to guide me up out of the chair, “You are going home and getting some food.”
With a tired sigh, I look up at him, “But I feel bad for leaving him. What if he wakes and no-one’s here for him?”
“He’ll be fine. If he wakes, I’ll explain to him that I made you leave.”
“Do you promise to keep me informed?”
“Yes. Now go, go on, beat it.”
“I don’t have a bloody choice, do I?”
Taking Braydon’s hand and letting him pull me up, I go to Finn’s side, giving him a small kiss. His dry lips against mine feel rough, not the normal softness I’m used to. Saying bye to Braydon, then to Dave and the guys, I reluctantly leave the hospital, but not before I’ve made Braydon and Dave remember to keep me updated.
On the way home, I decide I really don’t want to be by myself. I grab my phone from its holder and click the call button.
Maria answers on the first ring.
“Jord. How is he?”
“He’ll be okay, eventually. I’m coming to yours and picking up Chinese on the way, want some?”
“Oh, you really are my angel. Yeah, just usual, please babe.”
“I’ll be twenty minutes… ish.”
“See you in an hour then.” Before I cut off the call, I hear her sniggering. Cheeky cow.
She wasn’t far away from being right though. Forty-five minutes later, I’m pulling up at the front of her house. Grabbing the white plastic bag full of Chinese food from the passenger seat, I get out with a yawn. My body is physically tired, and my mind is mentally exhausted. All I want is to eat, shower, and sleep.
My best friend is at the door before I even reach it. Her arms spread out wide as I reach her. Wrapping my arm around her back, she hugs me, giving me the comfort, I need right now.
“You look tired.” She tells me, pulling back and moving us out of the doorway.
“You could say that again, but right now, I need food before I collapse.”
Closing the door behind us, she takes the bag from my hand and proceeds to the kitchen.
“Go, sit down, I’ll dish this up.”
“I love you; do you know that?” I shout after her as I walk back the other way. I drop down onto the couch, kicking off my pumps and swinging my legs around to put them on the opposite end of it.
A few minutes pass and Maria walks back in the room, passing my plate and some cutlery over to me. Before sitting herself down and resting hers on her legs.
Tucking into my sweet and sour chicken and boiled rice is a dream, I feel like I haven’t eaten for weeks. My stomach hurts as the food goes down; I’m that hungry.
Silence falls on the room as we both eat our food. I don’t say anything because I’m too weak and need to conserve energy. Maria, being my best friend for the last few years, knows that when I’m hungry, I don’t speak anyway. It’s probably the only time I am quiet.
The clatter of cutlery hitting plates cuts into the silence of the room, and I lean back against the cushion, making some room for me to breath. Maria smiles, putting her plate on the coffee table and she too sits back.
I grab my phone to make sure I haven’t missed any calls and send my boss a message. He’s going to have to do without me for a few days, I’m afraid. Finn is more important, and I’ve got a feeling he’s going to be bloody hard work, as he begins to recover.
Placing my plate with hers on the table, I get comfy on the couch, resting my cheek on a throw cushion. I lay on my side, pulling my knees up into the foetal position.
“So, how's he doing?”
I’m not sure what to say. Since he’s been asleep most of the time, I can’t really tell, so I shrug. Starting with his injuries is a good place, then I tell her his recovery time. There are only two meetings left, that’s going to be so hard on him, but he’s going to have to put up with it, I’m afraid.
