Obsessed with the Heartbreaker: An MM College Romance, page 10
Like an idiot, I kept asking Kevin about his latest trip and his hobbies, avoiding speaking about myself at all times. Sadly, it gave my mind free license to think about the Heartbreaker, to wonder whether my replacement had dared to close the distance between them and put a hand on Henry’s leg, whether the Heartbreaker was starting to relax and get his game on.
Get your filthy hands off him, I shouted in my mind to an imaginary version of Henry’s companion for the night.
“He does that with everyone, you know? Don’t feel bad. One time is all anyone will ever get from him,” Kevin said surprisingly close to my ear.
Right then I realized that my eyes had unknowingly flitted toward Henry, who was still thankfully sitting at least five feet away from my replacement, and I fought the blush coming on.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
With an awfully compassionate smile, Kevin added, “You don’t have to be ashamed of it, you know? It happens to the best of us.” He shrugged. “He’s the Heartbreaker after all.”
“I’m not pining after him, if that’s what you’re wondering,” I said defensively.
Why hadn’t I told him he was wrong?
Because he definitely thought that Henry and I had done…something.
And worst of all, he’d basically admitted that he had done it, too.
Or, well, it was just him who had done it.
Jealousy and hurt boiled inside of me.
Kevin was polite enough to ignore my pitiful defense. He put a hand on my shoulder. “Pining or no pining, it’s for the best. The Heartbreaker isn’t boyfriend material, anyway, no one would actually want to date long term someone like him. Consider him a trophy.”
A trophy?
Who the fuck did he think he was to speak that way about Henry?
My nostrils flared with repressed indignation, but I wouldn’t cause a scene. “We’ll agree to disagree.”
He raised one eyebrow but nodded. “And in any case, one good thing he did was bring us together, so what do you say if we…you know. Make the most of it?”
Ha.
Not in a million years.
I smiled sardonically at him, thinking about how best to answer it with enough bite to get him off my back for good while being polite enough not to make a scene, since this hadn’t been his fault.
But it wasn’t quick enough.
A single finger lifted my chin. “I knew we had good chemistry the other night.”
Right, from the two lines that we exchanged?
“I think you’re getting the wrong idea,” I finally said.
“Am I?” That arrogant eyebrow was taunting me, clearly thinking I was teasing. The guy was really not getting the hint, and now my patience and good intentions were gone, a biting remark already on the tip of my tongue—
But my thunder was stolen.
A second later, Kevin’s finger disappeared as he was pushed harshly against the wall.
“What the fuck do you think you’re doing, Kevin?”
It was Henry.
And the venom in his voice matched the barely contained fury in his eyes.
Kevin’s eyes were wide, hands raised. “Nothing, I was just—”
“That didn’t look like nothing.”
“Henry—” I started, reaching out to grab onto the forearm he wasn’t using to hold up Kevin, but the latter interrupted me.
“I was just testing the waters, okay? Seeing if he was interested, just as always.” He turned his eyes toward me, expecting me to defend him.
“Testing the waters?” Henry’s chuckle was the most threatening thing I’d ever heard, and it sent an unexpected wave of heat down south. “Did you suddenly go deaf the other night when I announced that if anyone dared to make a move on Antony, they’d be dead meat?”
What?
When had that happened?
“I…” Kevin trailed off, looking caught. “I thought you were already done with him, so it didn’t count.”
Fuck.
A blush was now rising up my neck, but thankfully none of them paid attention to me.
“You have two seconds to get out of this house or I’ll put your ass out kicking and screaming.”
“But—”
I almost felt the impact of Henry’s glare, and Kevin was smart enough not to fight. I was suddenly aware of the people currently watching our scene, frat guys with quietly threatening expressions that looked ready to jump into action with one word from their King.
Trailed by some of them, Kevin left, which made it so the entirety of Henry’s attention was now on me.
With one step, he stood an inch away from me when he whispered, “Up the stairs. Now.”
His voice left no room for disobedience. I was tempted to ask him ‘Or what?’, but I decided against it since this was what I’d come for.
I just hoped I hadn’t bitten more than I could chew.
Chapter 14
Henry
I’d been successfully avoiding Antony for days. I’d even managed to stop myself from going to the library, rein my little obsession in, but all of that had been of little use. Even if I knew that this had to stop, that we were getting into dangerous waters, that Antony was getting, once again, way too close to my vulnerable center, trying not to think about him was like trying to catch smoke between your hands.
Frustrating and futile.
It had been hard when we hadn’t been speaking for a long time, but now it was ten times so. It was impossible, especially when all I wanted was to take his face between my hands and devour his mouth. Pull his hair and push myself against his body, feel every inch of him until he smelled of me, like some sort of caveman. It didn’t help when Antony looked like he wouldn’t deny me, like he’d welcome my advance and let me have my fill.
But I’d been there once before already, and I wasn’t going there ever again.
Or at least that was what I’d been telling myself.
Then he had to show up at my party.
Uninvited.
Could I not escape him anywhere? He was like a plague. A pest. I was the stupid guy obsessed with him.
I was also the one who’d been trying to get over him by trying to make him think I had broken our pact without having to actually do it. A less than brilliant idea on my part.
My plan had been to just sit here with someone, anyone, then have someone start a rumor that I’d been seen with someone else. It would have hopefully reached Antony, who would have thought I had moved on, that I was totally fine, that I was a complete piece of shit, and thus be done with whatever had been going on between us for the past few days.
It was a stupid plan. A horrible one, too. God knew that the last thing I wanted to do was touch anyone that wasn’t Antony with a ten-foot pole, but sometimes, I hated myself a little too much. I’d wanted to send a message to Antony, yes, but more than that, I’d wanted to torture myself. Ruin our…connection before life ruined it for us.
Self-destructive was probably on my list of qualities.
What I definitely hadn’t wanted was for Antony to see how miserable I was while doing all of it. I selfishly hadn’t wanted to see the hurt in his eyes.
But, surprising me as always, he’d looked angry and determined instead of sad and resigned.
Then he’d gone and engaged Kevin in conversation.
He’d started a sick little game between us, one I hadn’t wanted to play.
And once I saw Kevin, the guy I’d slept with, put a finger under Antony’s chin, getting ready to kiss him…
I’d lost it.
And I never lost it.
I knew for a fact there’d be questions about it from my best friend when tomorrow came, but for now, I was too focused on getting Antony away from everyone to care.
Opening the door to the upstairs bathroom, I let myself in, and as soon as Antony was inside, I slammed the door closed and used my arms to cocoon him against it.
“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” I asked him, a tight ball of anger burning inside my chest.
“Breathing? Existing? Or is that troublesome to you?”
Christ, he had no right to look as good as he did. Dark eyebrow raised, a defiant look in those green eyes, and the most devastating shade of pink on his lips.
They looked way too fucking kissable. Bitable. I wanted to ravage him, devour his mouth like I hadn’t eaten for days, but I still had a shred of self-control, so I didn’t.
“What’s troublesome is the fact that you’re here. In this house. Uninvited.”
“I thought I should invite myself, given the fact that you had, yet again, decided to ignore my very existence, and I didn’t want to wait three years to talk to you again.”
My molars ground against each other, his sharp words hitting home. Not to mention his tone made my heart squeeze inside my chest, because he sounded hurt, and fuck if I wasn’t useless when it came to a hurt Antony.
I’d crumble faster than a house of cards.
This had never been a good plan.
“I wasn’t ignoring you,” I defended pitifully, because I definitely had been.
“Yes, Henry. You were,” he said in a dead tone. “Do you always run when you’re uncomfortable, Henry? Because this looks an awful lot like a pattern.”
Well, he was now getting way too close to the truth.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
That was the wrong thing to say, because Antony’s eyes lit up like someone had dropped a match inside him, and he went off. “You don’t—Fine. I’ll tell you exactly what this is about, and it’s me being sick and tired of this back and forth. Of you coming to me with the stupidest deal on Earth, and then ignoring me for months. This is about you, going hot and cold, bantering with me and taunting me and giving me hope, and then disappearing again. It’s about how for years you treated me worse than a fucking stranger, and even now you still can’t even call me by my name. To top things off, you dismiss our friendship and make me feel like a lonely, insane person for thinking that we had something special. That is what this whole thing is about.”
The ball of anger was now a ball of emotion, tightening my throat. It was the hot press of shame all around my chest. Did he think I wasn’t aware of all of this? Did he think I liked it? Did he think I didn’t hate with every atom of my being every inch that I used to put distance between us?
I hated it. And I hated hurting him.
But it was for the best.
“We weren’t friends, Antony,” I said, giving up on this one inch of space.
Starting to crumble.
Something flashed across his face. “Then what were we, then? Enemies? Rivals? Was I your nemesis? Because it never felt like it and it sucks that you want to make it look that way.”
What sucked was that he had my heart in his fucking fist and he didn’t even know it.
Clearing my throat, I tried not to sound choked up. “I could never be your friend, not after…”
“After you kissed me?” He let out a frustrated huff. “So what, Henry? It was just one kiss. And people talk about it instead of running away.”
That was it though, wasn’t it?
Even if he thought it was just one kiss, it hadn’t been for me. To me, it had been everything.
And I was too scared to get a verbal, resounding confirmation that he didn’t feel that.
So I didn’t know what else he was expecting from me, but he wasn’t going to get it.
“Well, I’m talking now, and I’m telling you, Antony Andino, that if you so much as dare to come here again and break our pact…” My arms went taught as I said this.
I knew I was being a hypocritical asshole even as the words were leaving my mouth.
But the feelings behind the words were there, honest and truthful, just the same.
“You’ll what?” Antony raised his chin in defiance, the corner of his lips rising up. “What will you do, huh?”
My nails bit the wooden door.
I couldn’t say it.
I didn’t know what to say.
Because I wouldn’t do anything to Antony, but I sure as fuck would feel like setting something on fire, getting my fists bloody, and screaming my rage for hours.
He waited for my answer but it didn’t come.
And with that, cocky, angry Antony showed his head.
“Let me tell you what I’ll do.” There were only a few inches between us, but still, Antony managed to make them smaller. To make the air in the room disappear.
“If you try and break our pact again, Henry, if you even pretend to be flirting with someone again, because God, you’d make a terrible actor, I’m going to fucking leave, and you won’t see me again.”
The way my whole body froze, my stomach filling with dread, was quite telling of how deep in shit I already was.
It took two tries to be able to speak.
“You can’t tell me what to do.”
I never said my brain was working properly.
“Can’t I?” His eyebrows raised in the most arrogant, edible way possible. My thoughts were concerning. “Watch me.”
He turned and tried to get the doorknob, but I put my hand on top of his. “Don’t.”
“Why shouldn’t I, Henry?”
“Because I’m asking you not to.” My voice was ragged, raw. He was breaking me open.
Still looking away, he said, “Give me one good reason.”
I turned him around, and his eyes shone with unshed tears. Not able to stop myself anymore, I reached out for him, taking his face in my hands, running my fingers through his hair, then tugging.
“You make me insane,” I said, voice rough. “You’ll make me go mad, Antony.”
Instead of trying to put distance between us, Antony tugged on my shirt, pulling me closer. “Same.”
“You’re the most infuriating guy I’ve ever met.”
“You definitely haven’t met yourself, then.” His words were light but his breathing was shallow.
We were breathing each other’s air.
I tugged harder on his hair, and his pupils widened, darkening his eyes, gaze set against mine. “We shouldn’t do this, it’s…It’s wrong.”
Wrong because we were wrong for each other. Because we were complete opposites, because I could still remember the words ‘He’s not for you, Henry’, and because I knew that this was going to end in disaster.
Antony chose that moment to tug me harder against him, eliminating the space between us, making me gasp with the shock of our bodies fitting against each others’. “Tell that to someone who cares.”
“Antony—”
Then he kissed me.
Chapter 15
Antony
I was kissing Henry Campbell.
I had my lips against his, and I had to say, it had been a long time coming. It was the result of years of pining and wanting and longing and not understanding. The result of months of understanding too well what my feelings for Henry were, what they meant, knowing that I could never have what I wanted, and coming too many times thinking of what could never be.
Now, I finally had Henry against me, and after a long moment, I pulled back, needing to see his reaction, that I hadn’t fucked up by giving in, but as soon as his face came into view, he put his hand on my jaw and pulled me to him.
Henry kissed me like he was hungry and I was the first meal he’d had in ages. Like he was thirsty, stuck in the desert, and I was the first drop of water he’d come across, and I kissed him back like he was the air I needed to breathe and I would die if I didn’t get another taste of him.
Our first kiss had been a lot more restrained than this, barely a hint of tongue that had lit me up from the inside out.
This one was desperate. He licked and licked into my mouth and I took everything he had to give. We grabbed onto each other, like we were afraid this moment would run away from us if we didn’t hold on to it, and I finally gave myself completely to the moment.
I was inexperienced and fumbling, but I was making up for it with raw desire. There was no space in my mind to think about Connell, grades, responsibilities, or the real world, there was just Henry, and I needed him more than I’d ever needed anyone in my life.
My back hit the door and still I kept trying to pull Henry closer toward me. Our bodies were flush against each other and our hands were greedy and starved. I kept reaching into his hair, grabbing it like I’d always wanted to, holding him to me and molding my body to his, grinding and rubbing so his scent would be all over me for days.
Henry kept kissing me deeply, letting out small pleasured noises that were making my brain go haywire. He held onto my face with a hand and explored my body with the other, grabbing, caressing, marking. Reaching the small of my back, he pushed me harder against him, like he couldn’t bear the thought of a single breath of air separating us, and it made me grind harder against his hardness.
I couldn’t get enough, and even one leg was going up his side. I was trying to climb him, for God’s sake, and Henry could only groan in response, pushing harder against me and grinding against my crotch.
The contact was way too good. I pushed my hard dick against his, desperate for harder friction, and Henry’s mouth gave me a break by going down my face and to my neck, where he sucked hickeys onto my skin.
“Fuck,” I gasped against a particularly hard, good thrust. My voice came out high-pitched, not able to control it. Henry reacted by using both his hands, big and strong, to grab onto my hips and push into me harder.
“Was this what you wanted?” Henry asked, voice rough, in between biting kisses I kept stealing from him. “Did you want me desperate and out of my mind?”
“Yes,” I panted, tightening my grip on his hair. “I wanted you just like this.”
I’d imagined it several times in fact. More than I’d wanted to admit. I’d imagined him suddenly coming to his senses and deciding to come for me, giving up on pretenses and succumbing to mindless desire.
I kept panting and moaning low, biting my lip as Henry put his head on the crook of my neck, grinding against me with a slow, sensual precision that made my mind go dizzy. Our jeans scraped on our hard, needy cocks, but I didn’t care, I just didn’t want him to stop.
