Driven by Passion, page 15
“Look at you.”
Victor held Lucien’s gaze—not ready to ask what Lucien could see in his expression—and spread his hands over Lucien’s back. The scratches on his hands stung a little and he ignored them.
“Why are you frowning?” Lucien brushed his forefinger over the crease on Victor’s forehead. “Did I do something wrong?”
“No. I want this. I want you.” Victor’s throat thickened.
“Only if you tell me why you are frowning?”
Victor sighed. “It’s not about you.”
“Do you think I make everything about me?” Lucien was frowning now. Victor shook his head. This man and his constant battle to be more than the selfish fuck he’d been raised by; it slayed Victor to watch Lucien struggle to believe he was a good person.
“This is getting out of hand.” Reluctantly, he removed his hands from Lucien’s back and held them up. “This is why I was frowning. Touching them hurts a little bit.”
“Victor. Why weren’t you wearing gloves?” Lucien stepped back and held Victor’s hands in his own as if they were precious to him.
“I wore gloves for most of the day, but at the end one of the guests didn’t have any and he wanted to make a wreath, so I lent mine to him.”
Lucien lifted Victor’s hands to his mouth and gently pressed kisses all over his scratched hands, with such tenderness that Victor couldn’t understand how Lucien couldn’t see his own caring nature.
“You have such beautiful hands.”
“I do?” Victor just had hands. They functioned, which he could concede was a type of pragmatic beauty.
“You do. And now you’ve gone and hurt them.” Lucien’s little kisses were going to destroy Victor. Every single one pierced his heart.
“I’ll heal.” He wanted to dismiss this moment, to make it less intense somehow.
“Your kindness is always getting you into trouble.” Lucien licked the inside of Victor’s right wrist and Victor’s knees buckled.
“What does that mean?” It didn’t exactly sound like a compliment but that didn’t make sense. Victor was caught off balance by the sensual way Lucien used his tongue on Victor’s tender skin, and the words he teased him with.
Lucien smiled. “Years ago, you made friends with an angry young man, and now look at you.”
“I don’t follow your logic.”
“You were kind to me and now we are both in trouble.”
“We are?”
“Yes. The trouble...” Lucien drew out the word, then blinked slowly. “The trouble is that I really want to keep kissing you. My friend...” Lucien breathed in and out with a little ragged noise, leaving Victor wanting to kiss him again. “And I don’t know if that’s a good idea, or a fucking brilliant one?”
Victor didn’t know what to say. A weird whimpering noise came out of his mouth, which was quite embarrassing.
“The trouble with kissing you is that it’s making me feel things and I—” Lucien sucked in a deep breath, his nostrils flaring. “I think I prefer sex when it’s less complicated. And I’m torn between wanting to strip myself bare and have you fuck me, and worrying that I’ll...”
“Ruin our friendship.” Victor worried about the same thing. “I worry too. What if this changes everything between us and I like you too much to lose you through a silly mistake.”
Lucien held his gaze for a moment, then leaned closer, resting his forehead against Victor’s forehead. They stood there for a long time, just breathing, with Lucien cradling Victor’s sore hands. It was probably already too late to be having this conversation.
“Goddamn it. I really want to kiss you again. Can I?”
Victor cleared his throat. “We are grown men. I’d like to think that we can manage to stay friends afterwards if we just try hard enough.” Just because part of him screamed that this would be impossible, didn’t mean that he couldn’t want to believe it.
“Let’s agree to do that.”
“You just want me in your bed.” Victor’s chuckle came out all breathy and weird.
“Yes. I really do.”
Victor didn’t have time to take a breath before Lucien was kissing him again. Their hands pressed against his chest as they kissed; open mouthed, fast, desperate kisses that said all the things that Victor couldn’t say. That he wanted Lucien as more than a friend, that he wished he believed that he was Lucien’s type—against all the evidence—and he’d always found Lucien incredibly sexy. How many times had he watched footage of Lucien walking in pit lane, unzipping his racing suit? The way his hand trailed from his throat down to his waist as he undid his suit was so goddamn hot. That he got to kiss him now seemed like a dream.
“You are thinking again.”
Victor couldn’t deny it.
“Does that giant brain of yours ever turn off?” Lucien nibbled at Victor’s bottom lip, rendering him unable to speak. He stared deep into Lucien’s golden brown eyes instead.
“I wonder if I could find a way to help you stop thinking.”
Victor growled. “I like thinking.”
“Think about this.” Lucien stepped back, released Victor’s hands, and pulled his shirt over his head. Fuck. Victor loved seeing him like this, all those lean muscles rippling, and his incredible tattoo with the steampunk cheetah covering his bicep and the words ‘wicked fast’, with the cheetah’s paw outstretched across his pectoral muscle, having just scratched Lucien with sharp claws. Victor reached out and traced the tattooed scratches on Lucien’s chest. Gooseflesh rose where his fingers touched Lucien’s skin and he leaned in to kiss Lucien again. The taste of him on his tongue was like the heady rush when drinking vodka too fast on a cold day and he had to slow down before he swooned.
“I’ve always wondered if the mechanical heart was a symbol.” Victor knew it was likely that Lucien had deliberately done this as a symbol; that the cheetah was ripping open his chest to expose a mechanical heart, one without the ability to love.
“Of course it is. Use that clever brain of yours.”
“You are capable of feelings.” Victor ducked his head and kissed the tattoo, dragging his lips over Lucien’s skin. The tattoo tasted just like the rest of Lucien’s skin—delicious with a weird hint of the holly they’d spent all day carrying—he knew it would because he’d been curious about the taste of tattoos years ago. Would they retain a hint of ink? He’d been wondering this before he got his own tattoo, not that he could kiss his own nipple to figure out the answer anyway, but he was hardly a virgin and there had been that memorable one-night stand in Baku after the S3 race there two years ago when he’d met an older man in a bar and satisfied his curiosity on the taste of tattoos and well... a whole bunch of other things.
“You are thinking too much again.” Lucien licked along the outer edge of his ear. “I love when you get all hot and bothered and your ears go pink.”
“You do?” Victor was glad of the excuse not to talk about what he’d been thinking about.
“I do. Now what was so interesting that you stopped playing with my tattoo?”
Victor’s face burned hot and Lucien chuckled.
“This is going to be good. Were you thinking about what you want to do with me?”
“Fuck.” Victor didn’t think his face could get any hotter but now it was an inferno.
“Now I have to know. Please.” Lucien licked his bottom lip. The little flash of pink dragging over his plush lower lip only added to the fire burning inside Victor. He’d lost track of whether the heat was desire or embarrassment or some weird combination of both where they fuelled each other into an inferno radiating out from his chest to consume him.
“It’s embarrassing.”
Lucien cupped Victor’s chin and lifted his face up, then traced one finger across Victor’s blazing cheeks. “I can see that. Your fantasies are safe with me.”
If only it has been something like that, not a weird train of thought that ended up being about someone else, but Victor wasn’t about to lie to his friend now. “Remember when you won the S3 race in Baku and we all went to that bar?”
“Yes.” Lucien paused. “You want a threesome?”
“What?” That wasn’t what Victor meant. He’d had no clue that Lucien had celebrated in such a way.
“That night, I had a threesome with two super-hot men. It was like a chain, and I was in the middle.”
Victor’s brain emptied. “Um...” His stomach churned at the image. Did he want that? Fuck, he could picture it with Lucien driving his cock into Victor while Victor did the same to some random person; being bisexual meant anyone could fill that role in this fantasy. Hell. He was going to expire on the spot; spontaneous combustion or something completely unscientific.
“I had no idea you were so kinky. How did I not know this?”
Victor felt like he’d been thrown off a cliff. This discussion had gotten completely out of control. “Wasn’t that. I didn’t know that had happened that night. I just meant that, um, I went back to that same bar a couple of years later, when I was still in S3 and you were in S1.”
“Okay?”
“I met someone.” Victor cursed his need for honesty because this was about the most awkward conversation he’d ever had in his thirty years on this planet.
“And had a threesome?” Lucien’s frown deepened.
“Fucking hell. No. We just had standard sex, a one-night stand.”
“But you were thinking about him while licking my chest? I don’t understand.”
Victor ran his hands through his hair. “This is so embarrassing. I was licking your tattoo and thinking about how tattooed skin tastes just like skin, not like ink or whatever, and how I knew this because of that night back in Baku, and then my brain just spiralled because it was fucking weird to be thinking about someone else while my tongue was on you...” If he believed in God, he’d be quite happy to be taken to hell on the wings of an angel or something dramatic to make him disappear.
“And now you want a threesome?” Lucien slowly smiled until he was laughing. Victor smacked him on his bare chest.
“No. I just want you. Damn it.”
“Good. Because while a threesome is really hot, I don’t want to share you with anyone.” Lucien’s admitted jealousy sent a fresh rush of heat down Victor’s spine.
“Same.”
“Come here.” Lucien held out his hands and Victor placed his own onto them. Lucien cradled Victor’s hands gently, careful not to hurt his scratches, and walked backwards to the small ensuite in their room. He ran the tap until it was warm, then used a cloth to gently wash all the scratches. Victor could barely breathe as Lucien cared for him with such tenderness. The complexity of this man who risked his life for his job, laughed and teased about threesomes, and freely gave his time to cleaning Victor’s hands was overwhelming. His insides were all soft and gooey at being cared for, and his cock was rigid at the thought of being fucked by Lucien in such a public display of need. As Lucien dried off his hands, Victor shuddered.
“Did I hurt you?”
Victor shook his head. “No. I just want ... you. I want you.”
“Now?”
“Yes.” He pulled his hands away and ripped off his clothes. “Stop teasing me and please just—”
“Kiss you? Blow you?” Lucien tilted his head, his lips curling at the edges. “Fuck you?”
“Yes. Please. Now.” All this talk of threesomes and not wanting to share and being looked after, had Victor trembling with need. He had to have Lucien now. No more talk. No more kissing.
Chapter 18
Lucien adored teasing Victor like this—more than the way he teased him as a friend—and seeing him strip off his clothes with fumbling fingers, desperate to be naked for Lucien was the ultimate outcome. He followed him out of the ensuite back into the main room. Victor threw himself on the bed, sprawled on his stomach with his ass in the air. Fuck, what a sight. Lucien stepped up behind him, leaning against his thighs.
“You still have pants on.” Victor whined, his voice all rough.
“Yes.” Lucien placed one hand on the flat of Victor’s back, and with the other, he reached around to hold Victor’s thick erection. The moan Victor let out was decadent. Lucien stroked him, loving the smooth skin under his palm. The drip of moisture leaking from the head of Victor’s cock told him how close Victor was, and he used his thumb to explore the tip of Victor’s cock.
“Please.”
Lucien leaned over Victor’s body, letting his chest touch Victor’s back, and whispered into his ear. “What do you need, Victor?”
Victor moaned, so deep that it was almost a growl.
“You have to tell me what you want. I need to know. I need your consent.” He wasn’t—ever—going to do anything without Victor’s explicit permission again. He’d stepped over that line once and he had to retain control over his anger, or any other emotion. He wasn’t going to let himself hurt someone just because his feelings got out of control.
“Please fuck me.”
“Do you have a condom?” Lucien wasn’t sure that he did, and the likelihood that he had lube was even less. Fuck. This wasn’t good, unless Victor was prepared. Lucien certainly hadn’t planned to have sex while on holiday with a random friend. Best friend? He wasn’t exactly swimming with choices for friends. There was probably a condom or few in his suitcase, leftovers from his pointless trip to the Maldives, but he wasn’t about to go hunting for one now on the off chance that he hadn’t tidied up from his last trip.
“No.”
“Then we can’t.” Lucien stood up and rolled Victor over. Before Victor had a chance to protest, Lucien went down on his knees and sucked Victor’s length into his mouth. He’d already been so close—begging for Lucien’s cock—and now it wouldn’t take much to bring Victor to the edge. For himself too, judging by the way his own cock rubbed his jeans uncomfortably. The salty taste of Victor’s precum was fucking delicious and he licked and sucked and took Victor deep into his throat. He used his shoulders to push Victor’s thighs wider and slid his hands up the insides of Victor’s legs, until he cupped Victor’s balls.
“Fuck. I’m close.”
Lucien hummed around Victor’s cock, loving the noises Victor made. Lucien flattened his tongue and took Victor as deep as he could without gagging, loving the way Victor’s balls tightened in his hand, and Victor’s gasps became shallower. Suddenly, Victor grabbed Lucien’s hair and pulled. Hard. It surprised Lucien, and his head jerked upwards with his mouth sliding off Victor’s cock with a loud pop.
Victor shouted insensibly, followed by a few babbled swear words. “Lucien.”
His name rang through the room as Victor came, spurting onto Lucien’s throat and chest. It was glorious. Victor’s face, with his eyes squeezed shut and his mouth open, was incredible. Lucien wanted to see that expression a million times. Victor flopped back on the bed, and Lucien would’ve been content to let him rest, except he could never resist teasing his friend.
“You can’t sleep yet.”
Victor half-heartedly lifted his head. “Huh?”
“No sleeping. Not yet.” Lucien waited.
“Oh, fuck, I’m so sorry. That was so good. I completely forgot about you.” Well, if that was a compliment, Lucien would take it. He’d given his friend such a good blowjob that he’d forgotten...
“Yes. We’re supposed to be at dinner in half an hour and you’ve made a mess of me.”
“Dinner?” Victor frowned, then scrambled on the bed. “Shit. Dinner. What magic did you weave that I’ve forgotten everything?”
“Not everything, I hope?” Lucien licked all the way Victor’s torso, then bit his nipple. Not hard, just enough that he’d gasp. Victor’s eyes rolled back in his head, so Lucien did it again, then licked the tiny tattooed car.
“Tastes like skin.”
Victor puffed out a breathy laugh. “Lucien.”
“Should I keep going?” Lucien could tease this gorgeous man forever, drinking in his ragged breaths. The way he said Lucien’s name made him feel like he stood on a podium. King of the world. Fastest driver on earth.
“I’m never going to get to dinner if you keep doing that.”
“Let’s have a quick shower.” Lucien would deal with his own erection in the shower. He leaped up and walked towards the ensuite. Once he reached the doorway, he glanced over his shoulder, before undoing his jeans and pushing them down his legs. Victor jumped off the bed and ran across the room, then wrapped his arms around Lucien’s waist. His hands were a little rough; partly from the way the holly had scratched them, and partly because he moved them quickly. Victor rested his chin on Lucien’s shoulder, kissing his neck as he stroked Lucien’s cock.
“Fuck, Victor, that’s so good.” Lucien had already been at the edge watching Victor’s pleasure and now the unsteady, needy, way that he stroked Lucien’s cock was pushing him closer and closer to... Lucien grabbed the door frame, needing the support, and his fingers clutched the wood until his arm muscles shook. With every stroke of Victor’s hand on his cock, he clung tighter to the door. His breath was ragged, out of time with Victor’s tight hand, and then Victor sucked on his earlobe. The combination of his hot breath in Lucien’s ear and the sharpness of his mouth was all it took.
“Holy shit.” He let out a long groan as he came hard enough to see stars. Victor kissed down his neck, and across his shoulder blades, and Lucien let his head hang forwards in the aftermath of a really fucking good orgasm. His breathing slowed and he was overcome with the urge to lie in bed with Victor and cuddle him. What? It must be a friendship thing, because he’d never wanted to do that with anyone else.
