Going Up (Up & Down Book 1), page 16
“I’m Grant and this is Melissa. We’re Alex’s parents. Mr Jackson, We wanted to thank you for waiting until we felt Alex and you were ready for this.”
“Everything I’ve ever done is for Alex.” Nick said, bypassing both Grant and Melissa’s handshakes and embracing them both “Thank you for being the one thing she deserved to have.”
My heart melted at how Nick was acting. His heart was on his sleeve, his emotions bare and naked. It was beautiful. Melissa stood back and wiped her eyes.
“It’s been our pleasure Mr Jackson.”
“Nick, please, and this is my friend Sarah.”
“Nice to meet you Sarah.”
“You too.” I replied smiling at them both.
“Alright, we’ll be back at 9 to pick her up.” Grant said walking back to the driver’s door of the car.
Melissa hopped in as did Grant and then the back passenger’s door opened.
Nicks hand flew to mine and he squeezed it tightly.
Alex hopped out of the car, she wore a yellow sundress and had curly blonde hair, pulled up into a ponytail. She was taller than me, but only just.. She looked over at Nick, whose hand was slowly losing grip of mine.
“Alex.” He whispered so softly it was more of a breath.
I looked up at him, and my heart both broke and soared at the same time. Tears streamed down his cheeks and his face was stricken with pride, and heartbreak.
Alex closed her eyes.
Her hands curled into fists and she wrapped her arms around her waist.
Finally she opened her eyes again and smiled
“Nicky.” She exclaimed, running into Nick’s arms.
Nicks hand left mine completely as he embraced his little sister.
I struggled to keep myself composed at the emotional reunion. Tears threatened to surface and I had a ball in my throat that wouldn’t go away. I walked over to the window of Alex’s foster parent’s car and Melissa was sobbing.
“He’s a good man; he loves his little sister more than anything.”
“Thank you Sarah.”
They left a few minutes later and when Alex and Nick finally stopped hugging Nick introduced me to her.
“Alex, this is my friend Sarah.”
Alex looked at me, and smiled. She and nick shared the same icy blue eyes, and cheeky smiles.
“Nice to meet you Sarah.”
“Nice to meet you too Alex.”
Then the three of us headed up the elevator to Nicks apartment for dinner. Nick had made pizza, which had filled the apartment with amazing aromatic smells and literally made my mouth water as we walked inside.
“Why don’t you two go and sit down and I’ll dish the food up?” Nick suggested as we walked past the kitchen.
“I can do that Nick.” I offered, tonight was about Nick and Alex. Not me.
“Please, let me.” Nick replied with a smile.
I nodded and walked with Alex to the table.
“So how do you know Nicky?” She asked.
“I work for him.”
“I still can’t believe Nikolai is my Nicky. Probably explains why when my friends used to peruse the trashy mags and see him and go on and on about how hot he is, I just thought… ew no.” she added with a giggle.
“I agree, you definitely got all the looks Alex.” I said overly loud, so that Nick could hear.
He made a “hmph” sound and Alex giggled again.
“So are you and Nicky like… a thing?” Alex whispered a small giggle followed.
The question caught me off guard and I shook my head a little over dramatically.
“You are!” she insisted.
“We’re not, he’s with Amelia.”
Alex shuddered then looked at me again.
“I don’t like her. Not that I’ve met her, she just seems fake”
I smiled and nodded.
“She is.” I whispered with a grin.
Nick walked across to the table balancing three plates on his arms. He placed them down in front of us then sat down himself.
“I’m sorry I just disappeared from your life Alex.” Nick said almost immediately. “I just had to get that off my chest.”
“I am too. I know why you left though, even then. It wasn’t you Nicky. You were my only constant in a world of pain.” Alex replied, she looked over at Nick eyes wide with tears brimming. I felt like I was encroaching on a private moment.
“Sarah helped me see that too, that’s why I contacted your parents.”
Nick looked over at me and smiled softly, I smiled back and looked down at my plate.
“You helped Nick because you know my pain don’t you.” Alex murmured.
I looked up and over at Alex. Our eyes connected and instinctively I nodded.
Alex smiled sadly at me.
“Thank you.” She said as her voice wavered slightly.
The three of us finished eating a little while later. I insisted on doing the dishes while they talked to give them some time to reconnect. At 9, Nick took Alex back down to be picked up while I stayed inside and waited for him to come back. When he returned he was on cloud nine.
“Mel and Grant invited me over for dinner next weekend!” he buzzed sitting next to me on the couch.
“That’s really great Nick.”
“Thank you.”
“That’s not needed.”
Nick took my hand and wrapped both of his around it.
“Yes, it is needed. You pushed me to do what was right.”
“You’d have got there on your own.” I insisted.
“Maybe, but until a week ago, I still blamed myself for everything Sarah. You helped me and I’m thankful for it.”
“Well alright, okay. You're welcome.” I shrugged, still not completely sure what I’d done or said to help him.
“I should probably take you home.” Nick murmured. “Or I might be tempted to pick up from that kiss in the car.”
My skin blushed and I sighed audibly.
“I wish you wouldn’t say things like that.” I groaned.
“I wish you wouldn’t blush like that, it only intensifies my urges Sarah.”
I looked over at Nick and rested my head against the couch
“It’s involuntary.” I protested.
“I know.”
With that Nick stood up and walked over to the bench.
“We should go… now.” He replied gruffly.
Only I didn’t want to go.
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
“Nick, Maybe I should hang around for a bit? The others went out for dinner and I’d hate to show up at the same time as them.” I exclaimed, in part it was the truth, returning home at the same time would open up a whole raft of questions that I didn’t want to answer. I couldn’t deny my reasoning was made easier by the fact that in Nick’s company I felt whole.
It was a ridiculous conclusion to come to, especially given everything that had already happened in the past week and a half, and given I had most emphatically stated more than once I didn’t want to be the other woman. I was sucker for punishment without a doubt.
I stood up and turned to face Nick, to gauge his reaction. He shoved both hands into the pockets of his blue jeans and shrugged. His sparkling blue eyes connected with mine, a cheeky grin spread across his face, and his left eyebrow arched.
“What do you propose we do instead Sarah?”
My face flushed, oh I could think of many things we could do instead. Most of the thoughts in mind presently all ended the same way, naked in Nick’s bed.
I blinked hard to push the thoughts from my head, I wouldn’t allow it to happen again, and especially not now Alex was back on the scene. If Amelia was ruthless enough to out Nick’s history like she had, then there was nothing stopping her from outing Alex as Nick's sister if she found out. I couldn’t let that happen.
I thought of something innocent, but thought provoking; given the persuasion Nick had been doing in regards to it all.
“We could talk about your record exec friend?” I suggested.
Nick’s grin faded a little, but not completely.
“Sit, I’ll go get something.”
Nick disappeared down the hallway and I sat back down on the couch. He returned a few minutes later with a laptop.
“What’s with the hardware?”
“I just called DJ. He’s waiting for us to Skype him.” Nick replied flippantly, as if it were nothing.
My stomach dropped, and suddenly I felt incredibly vulnerable.
“DJ… is?”
“My exec friend Sarah. If he likes you, well I could be looking for a new filer tomorrow.” Nick murmured a slight sadness to his voice.
I chuckled, like I’d be signed just like that. Things like that didn’t happen to people like me.
“Right.” I replied with a large dose of sarcasm attached.
“I’m not kidding Sarah.”
Nick opened the computer screen and hit the power button. I frowned and looked down at my attire. It was hardly fit for a potential audition, perhaps for an audition to sing jingles on the advertisements for childrens cereal on TV, but not for a recording contract.
“Relax, you look fine Sarah. Breathe, alright.”
“I wish I’d never mentioned the executive….” I admitted.
“You’re amazing. I’m a natural born talent spotter. Just relax.”
Nick’s computer logged on and I contemplated getting myself a glass of water, and accidentally tipping it over the computer. Of course, I didn’t and I watched as he signed in to Skype.
Before I had a chance to breathe in deeply and compose myself an incoming video call from DJ began ringing. Nick answered it, before readjusting the screen so that he and I were evenly on screen.
DJ smiled and said something to Nick and I. My head being a mess of nerves and complete confusion didn’t absorb any of it. DJ looked to be about 30, with a distinct rockabilly vibe roaring through him, I could see tattoos on each side of his neck and a black fedora sat on top of his black hair. His brown eyes sparkled, small crow’s feet were etched in to the corners of his eyes.
“Sarah, Nick’s told me a lot about you.” DJ said, breaking me from my thoughts.
“There isn’t much to tell I am sure.” I replied shyly.
“You’re right…. She is a little self-doubting… we’ll have to work on that.”
I looked at Nick, and held back a frown. He had talked to this guy about me and my tendency to self-doubt. Like he was a saint himself in that department.
“I’m just realistic. Nick has only known me a week and a half and has only heard me sing once. Along to the original,” I replied returning my face to the screen. “I fear he is only talking up my abilities.”
“I doubt it, Nick has an ear for this stuff Sarah and he only ever calls me when he thinks he’s found the next big thing. Last time he called me I signed Jaron Smythe.”
I cocked my head and blinked a few times. Jaron Smythe had broken on to the scene when I’d been in high school still. I remembered the girls all drooling over him and singing his songs. It had annoyed me somewhat because the lyrics to his songs were amazing, about the real world, but they only cared about the fact he looked good without a shirt on.
“I might have heard of Jaron.” I replied.
“Sarah, look it’s scary I know. This whole business is scary and fickle and I’m not going to lie… it can be downright cruel. Nick believes you have a real talent and given his very successful company, I’m inclined to believe him.”
I looked down at the floor and shrugged.
“Where do we go from here?”
“I want you to sing for me, if I like you, then we’ll arrange a sit down meeting tomorrow okay?”
“Oh, alright. Um. I’ll sing Creep I guess.” I shrugged again.
Nick leaped to his feet and jumped over the back of the couch
“I was hoping you’d say that.” he called out as he ran down the hallway.
Nick returned less than 30 seconds later with the iPod and dock.
“I've got an instrumental version for you.” He laughed.
“Aha!” DJ exclaimed with glee.
I sighed deeply as Nick turned the iPod on and flicked through the songs. The familiar drum and guitar intro began and I closed my eyes instinctively. Thom Yorke’s voice didn’t cue me when to start, but that didn’t matter my mouth opened and the words poured out at the right time regardless. Suddenly the fact Nick was sitting beside me, and a record executive was ‘judging’ me didn’t matter in the slightest. I was breathing the music and I’d never felt more alive. Ever.
The lyrics were soaked in my emotion, my heart, my soul and part of me felt like I was singing to the version of myself I once was. I didn’t feel like that person anymore though, at least not completely.
The song ended and I came out of the haze I was in, my skin instantly flushed once I realized how much I’d let myself go, how far I’d gone in to the song.
I looked up, first at Nick who was staring at me, his eyes wide with an unreadable expression across his face. Even if I had sucked miserably, I was certain now that music would be my life, someway or somehow. I returned my gaze to DJ who was smiling, I smiled back, grateful for the more positive reassurance.
“Nick, I’m sorry man.” DJ exclaimed, leaning back in his chair.
My heart beat out of my chest. Christ, I’d just embarrassed myself hadn’t I? I was shit, and he was apologizing to Nick for not being able to meet with me again. Nick sat forward and let out a small chuckle.
“I know, I’m going to need to advertise for a filer aren’t I.” He mumbled.
“Yes, you are” DJ laughed then took his fedora off and ran a tattooed hand through his black hair. “Sarah, I am going to have you meet with me tomorrow at 1pm alright?”
“Huh?”
“I want to discuss a recording contract with you.”
I nodded before the reality of it all hit me, I heard myself thank DJ before Nick disconnected the call and turned the computer off again. Five or ten minutes had passed before I managed to speak legible English again.
“He liked me?” I asked Nick.
“Liked might be understating it, look I’ll arrange a car to come get you from your place tomorrow and take you to see DJ.”
“I can find my own way there Nick. I’m not an invalid.” I replied softly.
“I know you’re not Sarah, I just like to make sure you’re safe.”
“You’re going to have to stop worrying about me Nick. I don’t think I am going to be working for you for much longer.”
I pulled my gaze from the floor and looked at Nick. His mouth was curved into his trademark smile, but his eyes showed something completely different, The spark had dulled a little.
Nick nodded then placed a hand over mine.
“Promise me something Sarah.” He whispered.
“Sure.” I replied without hesitance.
“Don’t forget about me okay.” His voice was shallow, like it had been the other night on the phone.
“You know that isn’t possible Nick. I’ve lived more in the past two weeks than I have in my entire life. I’m not going to wake up tomorrow and forget that.”
“We were never meant to be together were we.” Nick said finally, standing up.
“We haven’t had the chance to be together.” I mumbled, my heart felt heavy at the all too real reminder.
“That’s what I mean, if we were meant to be together, this wouldn’t be so difficult.”
I looked up at him, he was pacing the ground. I was confused. He’d pushed me to do this, he’d wanted me to be on the books. Now it was like he regretted it.
“Nick, you wanted me to do this, I don’t understand why you’re so upset.”
Nick stopped pacing and looked at me, his face was dark, with not a glimmer of the happiness he’d proclaimed to feel with me a few days ago.
“I’m not upset, I’m proud of you. So much that it hurts knowing that I need to let you go. You were right when you said we can’t do this, that we’d only known each other a week. You’re right saying I need to stop trying to protect you, it’s not my place.”
“You’re not making any sense Nick, I want to wait for you, and I will wait.” I said standing up. I walked over to Nick and took his hand.
“We’ve known each other a week, you’ve been given an amazing opportunity. One that will take you all over the world. You’re only 18. Whatever ‘this’ was, it’ll diminish.” He exclaimed, his eyes watered slightly and he shrugged.
Frustrated I pulled my hand back, how could he possibly think that after all that had happened my feelings were as transferable as that. How could he think that the most powerful connection I’d ever had with another person aside from my mother would just diminish? He’d pushed me to reach my potential and now he was acting like I’d scorned him.
“Thank you for everything Nick. I’m going to go home now.” I mumbled, and without another word I left the building.
On the way down the elevator I called Janie and asked her to pick me up from Nicks. She didn’t pry because my tone of voice was dark enough to convey that I didn’t want to discuss it. I could hear Josh and Marc in the background, but I was past caring about what Josh though about Nick and I.
They arrived a little while later, Janie was driving, and the boys were drunk in the back seat.
“They got a little carried away… You alright?” Janie asked as I hopped in to the car.
“I don’t think I work for Booked Out anymore,” I replied. “I’m meeting with a record label tomorrow.”
And I think whatever Nick and I may have had, is over.
I couldn’t decide whether to be happy or distraught.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR – NICK'S POV
Ever since she’d bumped hands with me the very first day we’d met I knew I was in trouble.
I’d not been a believer in love before, let alone love at first sight, but when she’d looked at me with those beautiful emerald green eyes, fresh with the fear of a new start something hit me in the gut, or perhaps it was the heart. Either way I was a goner.
