“Yeah. I’ll be sure to do that.” Rem turned to face her more fully. “I don’t want to impose on your supper, so I’m going to head out.”

  “You’re not imposing,” she said quickly. Her tongue came out, and she touched her lip.

  Rem’s eye caught on it, and he watched, fascinated, for a couple of seconds before he realized what he was doing and tore his eyes away.

  “I read over the report after you walked out. I don’t need any more time to make a decision.” Her chin tilted up. “I’m ready if you are.”

  The inside of his chest felt like a bucking bull that had lost its rhythm. His hands started to sweat, and his vision tunneled, the way it did just before he nodded his head to open the gate.

  He flexed his fingers inside his gloves. There was always that little temptation there, the idea that he could quit. Get off. Up until he nodded his head, there was always an out. Not that he’d take it, but it was there.

  Same for this.

  He’d never chickened out. Not on a bull’s back. He wasn’t starting here.

  “I’ll tell Ford. He’ll bring the preacher out tomorrow morning. What time will we be done feeding?”

  “I start at five, and I’m done by seven.”

  “I’ll tell him to be here at eight. That’ll give us time to eat breakfast.”

  Chapter 5

  Elaine stood at the stove, stirring the gravy. Behind her, Heaven helped Carson set the table. A plate clanked. Then the lighter click of silverware. A glass.

  The comforting smell of roast beef colored the air, with the softer tones of butter and mashed potatoes filling in the edges.

  The heat from the stove felt good after being out in the cold.

  Gabriel and Elijah were fighting over who had to clean up the basket of clothes that had just gotten knocked over. And Banjo, their dog, never one to waste an opportunity to put his mark on something that was clean, had burrowed into the clothes, prompting a hide-and-seek game.

  It was a typical evening in her home.

  Except there was a dark-haired, black-eyed Texan sitting at her table. If the ache between her shoulder blades was any indication, he was staring at her.

  Normally, she might have music playing, or she’d be laughing with Heaven over something the baby did, or she might try to put Banjo in the mudroom until the ice had melted off his fur and he was dry.

  But not tonight.

  Tonight, she felt like she had a ball of barbed wire in her stomach, and despite the warmth of the steaming gravy, her fingertips were cold.

  She wanted to pat her hair. Maybe put on something a little nicer than the t-shirt that she’d had since before the kids were born and the old jeans that had blown out both knees, plus the spot that had caught on an old rusty nail halfway up her thigh.

  Or put on shoes, rather than standing in front of the stove in her old gray socks that used to be white, with one big toe sticking out of the hole at the end. Wouldn’t be too bad, except the last time she’d painted them had been about three months ago, so half the nail had chipped green paint on it. The other half...didn’t. All her toes were covered in the other sock, but her heel stuck out.

  The cowboy behind her had new jeans on. His socks were white. His flannel shirt was neatly tucked into his jeans, and it fit his broad shoulders perfectly. There were no holes in any of his clothes.

  Maybe he wouldn’t want her touching his laundry.

  Was she going to do his laundry?

  Actually, the bigger question in her head was, where was he going to sleep?

  Two bedrooms and a bath upstairs. The three boys were in one, Heaven in the other.

  Downstairs there was a living room and a small bedroom in addition to the kitchen along with a nice sized bathroom with a tub and toilet, but it also held the washer and dryer.

  She spun around. “I can move upstairs into Heaven’s room.”

  He’d been looking at her, but he didn’t flinch or look away. “No.”

  She gathered all the spit in her mouth and tried to swallow, turning back around to the gravy that had started to boil two minutes ago.

  Supper was ready. Unfortunately, she was not.

  It was tempting to list all the stupid decisions that had led to this point in her life. The biggest being her marriage to James when she was twenty. People had said she was too young. She didn’t agree with that, because she’d still be married to him if he hadn’t left.

  When Remington Martinez was twenty, he’d spent a month in jail for disorderly conduct, public drunkenness, and resisting arrest.

  When she was twenty-two, Gabriel had been born.

  When Rem was twenty-two, he’d spent six months in jail. Driving while under the influence and totaling a 2010 Mustang.

  At that point, the report said that he gave up drinking completely, based on interviews with friends and acquaintances. No one else had been involved in his accident, but he could have killed someone that night.

  “Okay, kids. Wash your hands and sit down.”

  The kids ran to the sink. They always listened better when she called them for supper than when she told them it was time for bed. After James left, something that she had needed to learn was to discipline them and train them to obey. There was no way she could raise four kids on her own if they didn’t listen.

  Despite their high energy—they were kids after all, not robots—and the chaos in her home, her kids usually listened the first time.

  At the time she’d been figuring out how to train them, it had kept her mind occupied. Now, having kids that listened kept her sane.

  Gabe had grabbed Carson and put him in the high chair. Elaine turned the gravy off and grabbed the pot handle. She knew before she turned that Rem was behind her.

  “You just put everything on the table in the pans?”

  “Yes.” She’d long ago stopped using serving bowls except for Christmas. Why dirty two dishes?

  He grabbed the potatoes and the roast. She’d been betting that he was a meat and potatoes guy, but now she wondered if his tastes might run more toward spicy food. Tacos, chilis, and whatever else they ate in Texas. BBQ. Her children and she weren’t used to stuff like that, but she could learn to cook it.

  Her spices included salt, pepper, and ketchup. That was the total lineup.

  Something told her Rem might want her to expand her spice rack.

  She set the creamed peas on and noticed that Gabe was pulling the end chair back. When James left, Gabe, all of six years old, had taken his place at the end of the table. She’d moved to the other end with the baby beside her on her left. Heaven and Elijah sat on the right side.

  With a look at the table, Elaine grabbed the high chair and slid it down, moving the empty chair beside it to the spot beside the end she usually sat at, giving the head of the table to Rem. She wasn’t a feminist. Never had been, but the last two years had taught her clear as day that she didn’t want to have all the responsibility. Didn’t want to make all the decisions. Didn’t want to be solely responsible for the pile of bills, for calling the doctor in the middle of the night, for deciding when an animal was too sick to get better and needed to be put down.

  She’d been there. And it sucked.

  Rem could have the head of the table. She’d share the responsibility, or she’d give it to him. But she was worn out from shouldering it all herself. Being in charge wasn’t the most important thing. Not to her.

  His sharp eyes missed nothing as she pulled her own chair out and sat.

  She looked up at him, ready to see an arrogant smirk or even a smart comment. But she encountered neither.

  Instead he seemed to be trying to figure her out. Or maybe, as he looked at the head of the table and all the eyes that stared back at him, he possibly had a little respect in his eyes for the chair and the work and responsibility it represented.

  Regardless, his hesitation only lasted a fraction of a second; she’d have missed it if she weren’t watching for his reaction. He pulled the chair out and sat down, looking at all the blond-haired, blue-eyed people staring back at him.

  Finally his gaze rested on Elaine. “Do I say the blessing?”

  Normally she made the children take turns for breakfast and dinner and she said it at the supper table. But hope had stirred in her breast at his question. Not only because that question, combined with his getting married in front of the preacher comment, gave her hope that he respected, if not loved, her God, but also because coming on the heels of him realizing what she was giving him by seating him at the head of the table, he hadn’t needed to ask her.

  But he had deferred to her, anyway.

  It was possible that she wasn’t marrying a tyrant.

  “Yes,” she said, more because she wanted to hear him pray than because she thought he ought to do it.

  He didn’t flinch. “Let’s pray.” His low drawl warmed her heart as the proud, dark head bowed, bending to the idea that there was Someone greater than he in the universe, willingly giving the respect and honor due such a Being.

  “Lord God, I thank you for this table, this food, and this family. Bless the hands that raised it and prepared it. Give us nourishment and rest, and may any glory be yours in the name of Jesus. Amen.”

  He lifted his head, his eyes searching for hers immediately as though wanting her reaction.

  Elaine realized with a start that she’d spent the whole prayer staring at Rem and had neither bowed her head nor closed her eyes. Her cheeks heated.

  On a normal day, her children would have called her out for not giving God the respect he deserved by a head bowed in homage. But they seemed cowed by the dark cowboy and were unusually quiet.

  Elaine picked up the roast and handed it first to Rem.

  He took it, picking up the serving fork and looking at Elijah on his right. “How much do you usually get?”

  Elijah’s blue eyes widened, but his mouth stayed closed.

  “Just a small bit,” Elaine said. “He can get more if he finishes that.” She was sure she had enough meat cooked, despite the large serving Rem put on his plate before passing the roast to Heaven.

  Ford had kept her supplied with meat when she didn’t have a steer of her own to eat. She always had the butcher cut the roasts in big pieces when she had a beef done. Not only were the butchering fees cheaper, but she’d use leftovers for roast beef sandwiches tomorrow or stew.

  She eyed the amount of meat Rem put on his plate. There might not be leftovers today. She scooped out enough potatoes for herself and Carson then passed them on, trying not to stare at Rem’s big, dark hands. How could she not stare? Those were the hands of a man who could turn this ranch into a profitable operation. Strong hands.

  She passed him the peas. He gave them a dismissive look and started to pass them on, then he stopped. Glanced around at all the faces staring back at him. His lips twitched, and he pulled the pan back, grabbing a scoop.

  “You want peas, bud?”

  Elijah looked at Elaine.

  She raised a brow at him. “You can tell him the truth, but you’re still eating a helping.”

  “No, sir. I don’t,” Elijah said.

  Rem snorted and shot a sideways glance at Elaine. They shared a smile. Her heart trembled.

  His brows lifted before he turned back to Elijah and, without a word, dumped a small scoop of peas on his plate. He handed the pan off to Heaven, who actually liked peas and took two helpings.

  Rem dug in without saying much. Elaine didn’t expect him to. In her experience, men didn’t mess around with their food. Her children were quiet, too. Much quieter than usual. That was a relief, except if Rem were going to lose his temper with them or if childish noise was going to be something that annoyed him and caused him to leave, she’d rather know it now.

  Even though her rational mind knew pretty much anyone could fake it for one evening.

  It didn’t take long to eat.

  “Gabe, you take Elijah and finish folding those clothes.” Elaine pushed back from the table. “It’s your turn to help clear the table and do the dishes, Heaven.”

  Rem stood as well. “That was the best meal I’ve had in a long time. What can I do?”

  “You don’t need to help,” Elaine said as she wrung out a cloth to wipe Carson’s face. “We’ve got it.”

  Rem didn’t say anything. Heaven stacked the plates. He carried the pots to the counter then started water running in the sink.

  Elaine had her back to him as she wiped the mashed potatoes off Carson’s face.

  “So, am I washing?” he asked.

  She turned sharply, but he was looking down at Heaven who gazed up at him with almost hero worship, nodding.

  Fear rolled over in Elaine’s stomach. Would her children be able to handle falling in love with another man then having that man leave like their father did? She didn’t want to put them through that, wanted to protect them.

  Of course she knew that she couldn’t protect them from everything and that they needed to experience bumps and bruises in life in order to learn and grow and become stronger people, but parents were supposed to be the constant through a child’s life while those bumps and bruises were happening. Not the ones causing them.

  Behind her, Rem carried on a low conversation with Heaven, who answered in monosyllables while she carried dirty dishes to the small counter. He didn’t talk to her like a kid, which Elaine thought was good, but she suspected that he hadn’t been around kids much.

  Finished wiping Carson, she set him down. He toddled over to Banjo who had made short work of any crumbs that fell from the table. She smiled as Carson grabbed the dog in a big hug, chattering away as toddlers did. It was times like this, seeing how happy her son was and how good Banjo was with him, that made all the messes she cleaned up because of the dog worthwhile.

  She made short work of wiping his high chair and putting it away. Hesitating because she was still not used to the sight of a man standing at her sink, she moved over.

  “I’ll finish here, Heaven. You go put your clothes away.”

  Heaven set the last glass on the counter and hurried into the room with her brothers.

  Taking a deep breath, Elaine stepped to the counter and glanced over the leftovers.

  “It’s been a while since I washed dishes. People mostly have dishwashers nowadays,” Rem said. His shirt sleeves were rolled up to his elbows. His forearms were brown as they disappeared into the water. The twisting muscles fascinated her.

  His head turned, maybe to see why her hands had stilled. Her eyes snapped to his, and her neck heated. She hadn’t meant to stare at his arms.

  She begged her brain to grind into gear. What had he said?

  “A dishwasher is on my wish list, but I’m not holding my breath to get one anytime soon.” There were a hundred other things that would actually be considered necessities. Like fencing to keep her cattle in. Groceries.

  “I don’t mind washing dishes,” she said. If he didn’t want to, she could finish. “It gives me a little time to think. Usually the kids are scarce when I’m doing it.”

  “They’re probably afraid you’ll rope ’em into finishing up if they show their faces.” He put another plate in the drainboard and didn’t show any signs of stopping.

  “That’s exactly right,” she agreed, surprised that her uneasiness had faded somewhat. She was marrying this man in the morning. She didn’t expect to be relaxed tonight.

  But as she moved around, gathering the things she needed to turn the leftovers into shepherd’s pie, she found the splash of the dishwater and his casual movements relaxing indeed. Especially combined with the chatter of her children in the other room.

  “I’d better remind them they’re supposed to be folding those clothes and putting them away.”

  “Yeah, kind of sounds like they might be burying the dog.”

  Almost to the living room doorway, she stopped. “I’ll make sure that doesn’t happen to your clothes.”

  He rinsed off a plate, his hands shiny wet and brown. No less tough-looking as they handled the cheap glass. “I’m not worried about it. If this is the way winter is up here, I doubt I’ll see anyone ’til spring anyway.”

  “We see folks at church on Sundays if we get the feeding done in time.”

  “I’ll see that it gets done.” Their eyes met.

  Something seemed to pass in the air between them. Something hot, and Elaine felt something a little dangerous, too. But it made the tension drain out of her shoulders. Maybe some that he was planning on going to church, would make sure they went. But more that the burden no longer rested squarely on her.

  Her lips turned up, and she nodded once before going into the room.

  Chapter 6

  Rem watched Ford’s SUV pull into Elaine’s driveway. It wasn’t as chilly this morning as it felt last night, but maybe that was because the wind wasn’t as strong.

  Elaine had been there to greet him when he arrived at five this morning. They’d fed, then she’d cooked breakfast while he showered. He supposed it should have been the other way around, but she was getting ready now.

  The brewing tornado in his stomach had been unexpected, so he’d walked out onto the old, ramshackle porch to watch the sunrise over the snowy flatland.

  This was supposed to be a business proposition. He’d intended to keep his marriage vows, of course. He didn’t give his word lightly. But he’d thought he’d just stay detached from Elaine and her children.

  When Ford had mentioned this idea, it was the ranch and the money that interested him. He hadn’t even cared what Elaine had looked like. Hadn’t expected to see a slender woman with perfect curves. Hair the color of wheat straw that hadn’t been rained on. Eyes that evoked the same emotions he felt when he looked at the sky of his home state.

  Emotions. He wasn’t supposed to be feeling emotions.

  He’d thought they could be friends. He’d seen plenty of marriages with less. Although, in today’s world, most people with less divorced to try again with someone else rather than put up with, or fix, what they had.

 

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