The Cowboy's Lucky Lady (Horsehead Texas Series Book 5), page 11
“Yeah, I get that, Dane. And you’ve been at it a hell of a long time. So where does Alexis fit into all this?”
“If I quit competing so I can be with her and then I can’t hack the lifestyle, I can’t very well go back on my word and tell her I’m heading out on the road again. That’s about the worst thing I could do to her.” Just the thought of hurting Alexis made his stomach burn.
He went on, “And it’s not just Alexis that worries me. Dad’s counting on me to run the ranch with him when I retire. And you know Jack. He doesn’t want anything to do with ranching. Honestly, I can’t imagine how my brother and I could be more different.”
Jace laughed. “I still can’t believe that little Jack is a big-time investment advisor in Houston. He must have been adopted.”
Dane chuckled. “He’ll help out when he comes home for the holidays and stuff like that, but otherwise? He’s a city slicker at heart. So Dad counts on me taking over the ranch.” He sighed. “I don’t know, Jace. How do you hack it, working in the same place day in and day out?”
Serious now, Jace said, “One day at a time, bro. It’s not easy for anybody. I’d like to travel and have more fun than I do, but, hey, who would watch my place, feed my cattle, run off the varmints? Since Dad died, it’s just me and Herc taking care of things, and I sure can’t leave a high school kid in charge.”
Dane had never considered that his friend might be frustrated with his lot in life. Jace was always upbeat, the life of the party. Seldom had Dane known him to be keenly serious like this. “Jace, if you ever want to take a break when I’m home, I’ll have your back. I’d take care of your place in a heartbeat.” Maybe Jace needing him was another reason not to go back to rodeoing.
In the same straight-shooting tone of voice, Jace said, “I appreciate that. As for Alexis, I’m not sure what advice I can give you, Dane, except to be true to yourself. Don’t try to force yourself to be someone you’re not.” After a pause, he went on. “I can tell you, though, I think you’re cut out to be a rancher. It’s in your blood.
“And something else. I’m not speaking from experience, but there’s a lot to be said about settling down with the love of a good woman and starting a family. I can’t think of anything that has the potential to bring you more joy.”
Dane’s body relaxed at Jace’s description of his possible future. That did sound perfect. He got out and shut the gate. “Thanks, Jace. You’re awesome—but don’t let it go to your head, bro.”
Jace cracked up. “Let me know how it goes, Dane.”
When Dane had finished feeding, he drove the mile down to the end of the ranch drive for the mail.
He shuffled through the grocery store sales paper and several other flyers and then froze. Alexis had written him a note. His heart did a frantic flip-flop. Holy shit, was she blowing him off with a letter? He tore the envelope open and saw “Thank You” emblazoned on the front of a card. Inside, it said:
Dane,
Huge thanks for sending your friend Jace over to take care of the ranch while I was gone. He did an amazing job, especially considering I was nearly out of my mind when I walked him through everything.
Again, I had a wonderful time, and I appreciate what you did for me in Reno more than I can say.
I miss you, Rodeo.
Alexis
His heart soared. She missed him? But she didn’t say that he could call. That was definitely not in the note. But she missed him? Heart soaring, he shoved the note into his shirt pocket and climbed back into the truck. All wasn’t lost.
Alexis looked in her side mirror as she reversed the stock trailer into its spot next to the big metal barn. She’d taken a cow over to the vet’s office to save the call-out fee. Thank goodness she had two border collie cow dogs that had helped separate the animal from the herd and load her into the trailer. Her cattle were used to being worked by the dogs, and the cow hadn’t given Sadie and Sammy much trouble.
A moment later, as she cranked the handle on the gooseneck trailer, raising it from the bed of the truck, her thoughts headed immediately to Dane. Surely he’d received her note by now? She hoped it reassured him that she cared about him, because she did, so very much. It was just his lifestyle that she couldn’t come to terms with, despite her brain going at the problem night and day.
Of course, Dane wasn’t Mark. She knew that. Dane wasn’t an asshole. The problem she had was that she’d never known that Mark was an asshole, either.
She sighed. In all honesty, Mark had never been as kind, as caring and attentive, as Dane had been. Not even once. And although she and Mark had had tons of fun, he didn’t make her laugh like Dane did.
He had also been good in bed, but he didn’t hold a candle to Dane. She smiled, remembering her lovemaking with Dane. Even the night when he’d given her a massage had far surpassed anything that she’d shared with Mark.
But the issue that counted couldn’t be avoided. Dane would be on the road all year long, and there would be Buckle Bunnies throwing themselves at the handsome cowboy the second he left the rodeo arena.
She couldn’t expect him to live like a monk. He should be able to go out for drinks with his friends. But she knew with certainty that she didn’t want to live with the agony of wondering whether each night would be the night Dane found a woman he couldn’t resist.
She pulled the truck out from under the trailer and drove up to the house, disturbed as she always was when she considered that scenario.
Striding up the porch steps, her stomach burned from her thoughts. No. She couldn’t, wouldn’t, go through that pain again.
When she walked in the door, her Gran called, “Dinner’ll be ready in a few minutes, honey. You just have time for a shower.”
“Something smells awfully good, Gran. See you in a few.” She was so lucky to have her grandmother at home to cook and clean, although Alexis pitched in on things like vacuuming, which she felt might be too hard on the older woman.
In the shower a few minutes later, her mind again returned to the problem of Dane. She desperately wanted to call him, wanted to hear his husky, sensual voice. She shivered, although the water falling on her body was filling the stall with steam.
Pressing her forehead against the wall, she let the hot water cover her sore back. What she wouldn’t give for one of Dane’s massages tonight. “Oh, Dane,” she whispered, as desperation took hold of her. She couldn’t live with him on the road, and now... Now she knew that she didn’t want to live without him either.
She leaned under the showerhead as hot tears blended with the water raining down on her. There was no answer, other than to keep Dane out of her life. Her heart hurt so much that she pressed it with her palm to ease the pain.
She wouldn’t call him. It wouldn’t be fair to either of them. Not when she’d made up her mind that she couldn’t handle a life with him on the road. Because she would never ask him to give up rodeoing, any more than he would ask her to give up ranching.
She let the tears fall until the water ran cold. Then she put on a pair of old sweats and went down to dinner with a smile on her face.
Chapter Twelve
The next morning, Alexis backed the hay truck up and slowly lowered the fork that held the big round bale. When the bale was just inches from the ground, she strode over, took out her big Case pocketknife, and began slicing the netting off the bale.
This mundane task allowed her mind to wander. She’d called Jennifer right after she arrived back from Dallas and had told her everything that had happened, and now Jennifer thought Dane hung the moon. Alexis smiled. For obvious reasons.
After last night, though, she really needed to talk to her friend. She put the call through and tossed the netting that she’d removed into the truck. Using the remote, she lowered the bale all the way to the ground as the call rang through.
“Alexis! Hey, girl, how are you?” her friend asked in her usual cheery voice.
“Oh, Jennifer, I had a horrible night.” She told her about the shower and how she came to the decision that she couldn’t see Dane anymore.
“Honey, why didn’t you call me?”
“Honestly, I was feeling sorry for myself and needed time to lick my wounds. Not very heroic, I know,” Alexis said.
She drove slowly away from the bale and it tilted, dragging itself off the fork. With the remote, she raised the two tines out of harm’s way and headed for the pasture gate.
“You don’t have to be heroic all the time, you know. You’re allowed to be a weakling once in a while,” Jennifer said with a soft laugh. “Honey, are you sure you can’t handle it if Dane follows the circuit when he’s all healed up? He’s not that bastard Mark. Dane sounds like an amazing man.”
Alexis shifted into second and headed down the pasture road toward the gate. “He is amazing, but then I thought Mark was a great guy too. Don’t you see? I have this shitty ability to read men!” She slapped her hand on the steering wheel.
“Girl, we all make mistakes when it comes to the opposite sex. You just had a bad experience with a rotten guy. That doesn’t make every other guy horrible.”
Alexis sighed and rolled down the passenger window. It was a beautiful day, and there was a nice breeze blowing. “No, but I don’t want to take that chance, not when Buckle Bunnies will be falling all over Dane wherever he goes.”
Jennifer blew out a frustrated breath. “Bestie, what are you going to do? Become an old maid?”
“No, I... Maybe. I don’t know.” She pulled up to the gate and got out to open it. “Look, I’m scared, all right? I’m petrified that I’ll get hurt again. You know what happened back then, how I fell apart. I just can’t go through that again. Gran and Gramps depend on me too damn much.”
“Honey, I know. And, yes, I remember how devastated you were.” After a pause, Jennifer went on. “I’m just going to say one more thing, Alexis. You have to decide—do you trust Dane, or don’t you? It really has nothing to do with Buckle Bunnies or anyone else. Do you trust Dane? Figure that out, and you can move forward.”
As Alexis pulled through the gate, she said, “Thanks, Jennifer, for listening to me wail about my troubles. You’re the best.”
“I’m worried about you, honey. Keep in touch. If I don’t hear from you soon, I’m coming over there.”
Alexis smiled and ended the call. She was no closer to an answer, but her friend had clarified the issue for her.
Now she needed to focus on obtaining the remainder of the money that she needed to pay off the ranch mortgage. She wasn’t sure if she should take a week or two off to rest, or if she should go to Vegas right away.
She’d been thinking about it a lot, and she couldn’t get the memories of Dane supporting her in Reno out of her head. She’d give anything to have him go with her to Vegas when she put everything on the line again. She just had no idea what to do about it.
She shut the gate behind her and climbed back into the truck. Her phone lay on the seat, and she scrolled down until she found Dane’s contact. Just seeing his name made her feel like he was near. She laid the phone against her heart. Oh, Dane, what am I going to do?
Dane finished feeding at the barn and headed for the house. It had been exactly a week since he and Alexis had returned from Reno. He was through waiting. He took out his phone and texted:
Have you thought about when you’ll head to Vegas?
He slipped his phone into his shirt pocket. Either she’d answer or she wouldn’t, but he’d thrown down the gauntlet.
Ten minutes later, his text tone sounded. He was naked and stepping into the shower. He turned the water off and retrieved his phone from the edge of the sink.
It’s been on my mind these past few days, as have you. I can’t decide whether to go now or to wait a few more days. And then there’s the problem of what to do about the ranch. Dane, I’m—oh hell.
He grimaced. What was that about? Dammit, he was calling her. He tapped her contact, and the phone rang four times before she picked up.
“Dane?”
“Yep. What’s going on, Alexis? Tell me what’s wrong.” His pulse had sped up when she hadn’t finished her text, and he waited impatiently for her to speak.
She sighed. “Thanks for calling. It’s just, I’ve been thinking...”
He squeezed his eyes shut, his frustration growing as she paused again. “Alexis, will you just spit it out? You’re worrying me.”
“Dane, I’m sorry. There’s nothing to worry about. It’s just, I was... I remembered how amazing it was to have you at my back in Reno and, uh...”
Wait, did she want him to go to Vegas? That didn’t make sense. She couldn’t even decide if she wanted to see him again or not. “What are you trying to tell me, Alexis?”
She heaved out a breath. “What I’m doing a horrible job of asking is, will you go to Vegas with me? I can’t bear the thought of putting my future on the line without you.”
A rush of adrenaline made him a little dizzy, and his loopy grin in the mirror almost made him laugh out loud. “I’m happy to go with you, Alexis. And, as far as the ranch work, I have someone else we can call on for that this time. A guy named Jesse Davis.”
“Oh, Dane, it would mean so much to me if you’d go.” Her tender voice sent warmth sweeping through him.
“Alexis, I have to ask, have you made up your mind about anything else yet?”
She was quiet for a long time, and he let it ride. It was too important to push her on it.
“Dane, I’ve worried myself sick over whether I can handle a relationship with you while you’re still rodeoing, and I just keep coming up with the fact that I’m not strong enough to do that. I can’t handle the stress and anxiety.” She paused. “You can back out of going to Vegas. You won’t hurt my feelings.”
“Hell, honey, I’m not backing out of Vegas. When all’s said and done, the most important thing I am is your friend. As long as you want me with you, I’m there.”
Was that a sob he heard? “Alexis?”
She sniffed. “I’m here. I’m just thinking what a pathetic friend I am to you. I can’t even trust you out of my sight. What kind of friend is that?”
Then she began to cry for real and choked out, “Bye, Dane. Thanks... Oh God—” She hung up.
Shit. He texted:
I’ll call you in an hour, honey. Everything will be okay.
He turned the shower on again. But would it? If they couldn’t have a romantic relationship, he would never be okay.
After telling his mom that he’d eat dinner later, Dane went upstairs to his room to call Alexis back. He tapped her contact as he lay down on the bed.
“Dane? I’m so sorry for earlier. I shouldn’t have fallen apart like that.” She sounded calmer but still not herself.
“You don’t have anything to apologize for, Alexis. You feel how you feel.” After a few seconds, he went on. “Listen, about Vegas. Let’s forget about what happens next. We’ll focus on why we’re there and enjoy each other’s company. Can we do that?”
She sighed heavily. “Dane, that sounds wonderful. And thank you for agreeing to come. I’ll pay for everything out of my winnings.”
What? Oh no, she wouldn’t. “Hey, you need that money to pay off your debt, remember? I’ve got this covered. I’ve been wanting to go to Vegas again anyway.” Honestly, he didn’t really like the place, but there was no way he was telling her that. “When do you want to go?”
“The sooner the better, I guess. As long as I can get the ranch situation handled.”
“I’ll get on that right now, and I’ll make reservations for our flights and hotel. You pick your casino.”
“How will I ever thank you, Dane?”
“You don’t have to. I’m doing this because I’m your friend. Now let me get on this. I’ll let you know what I come up with.” It was all he could do not to call her “honey”, but he wanted to leave the ball in her court when it came to their intimate interactions on this trip.
His heart nearly stopped when he read her text a moment later:
Save money. Book one room.
Alexis checked out her reflection in the mirror. She’d chosen the bright-red, sleeveless dress with the scoop neck for her first night of gambling. Her hair was put up in a casual French twist, and her round black onyx earrings shone in the light. She’d do, all right. Every time one of the male players looked at her, they’d forget all about their cards. She smiled. At least they’d think twice before placing their bets.
It had been a little strange showering and getting ready in the same room as Dane, which was weird since he’d seen her naked numerous times. But she’d put a good face on it and had gone about her business.
For his part, he’d paid her no attention, giving her the privacy she needed like the wonderful gentleman he was.
She stepped out of the bathroom, and Dane turned from the window high above the Vegas strip. He gave a low whistle. “You look gorgeous, Alexis. You’ll give those men at the table a heart attack.”
She laughed. “Thanks—and I hope not. I want to win lots of their money.” She joined him and took in the view. He’d booked them at a beautiful hotel called The Cosmopolitan. When they’d arrived, she told him that she couldn’t believe that he’d reserved such an expensive place to stay. He’d only said, “You’re worth it.” Her heart warmed at the memory.
She hooked her arm through his. “You did good, Cowboy. I feel like a million bucks. Maybe I’ll just win a million while I’m here.”
“That’s the spirit.” He slipped his arm around her shoulders and drew her close. “I have faith in you. You’ll win big, don’t you worry.” After a kiss to her temple, he said, “You ready to head out?”
She was wearing the black shoes with her dress and grabbed the matching clutch from the dresser. “Ready to rock, Rodeo.”
They’d eaten an early dinner at the hotel so that she wouldn’t be plagued by hunger pangs during the evening. As they headed for the elevator, she clasped Dane’s hand.
