Alex was unloading his camera equipment while I was dealing with the cooler, when someone called out to us. A slim old man with a white beard and mustache waved to us and walked our way. His body was so deeply tanned his skin had a leathery look to it.

  “Are you boys here for the festival tomorrow?” he said.

  I turned my attention away from the cooler to him.

  “We’re spending the night, but being new around here, we haven’t heard about this festival,” I said. “Tell us more.”

  “Is anyone welcome to join in the festivities?” Alex said to the man.

  “My name’s Billy.”

  We all shook hands and finished introductions.

  “I’m Layton,” I said, and smiled.

  “And I’m Alex.”

  “Anyone’s welcome to join in the festival fun,” Billy said. “Especially, two such good-looking guys like yourselves.”

  “What exactly happens at this festival?” I said.

  “The whole festival goes back to when this campground was first established. The original founder, who was my partner until he died, bought this land with a handful of emeralds he had on him. Every year on the same day, he would hold a festival in honor of the green-eyed lady statue he got the emeralds from. He also started the Cult of the Green-Eyed Lady, which goes around doing good deeds all year long. Tomorrow is the day we gather together to eat and party. At night there will be a masked ball.”

  “A masked ball at a nudist camp?” Alex said.

  “The guys wear green Mardi Gras type masks and beads, but nothing else, except for body paint and glitter in shades of green. It’s a lot of fun. You boys won’t want to miss it. Well, I’d better take off and check on preparations for tomorrow. I’ve been living here a long time; so if you need anything, my trailer’s the emerald green one on the other side of the lake across from the pool. Plus you can just mention my name, if I’m not around—I know a lot of folks here.”

  “That’s awfully nice of you,” Alex said.

  “I don’t handle the front desk anymore, but I still like to mingle with the new folks, even more so when they’re cute like you two. I’ll see you boys later.”

  “He definitely will,” I said to Alex, after making sure Billy was out of earshot.

  “Is that what you call in your biz, a lucky break?”

  “I would say so. Let’s get this stuff to our room. I don’t suppose you have any ideas for dealing with our friend Buck.”

  “A couple I’m chewing on,” Alex said, “but I’ll let you know more when I have something definite.”

  * * * *

  We managed to fit everything into the small room and I was kind enough to divvy up the eye cookies and the rest of my watermelon candy sticks while we caught up on things with Buck, who already knew about, and had been invited to the green-eyed lady festival.

  “That Billy’s a wiley old goat,” Buck said. “He had his hand on my butt the entire time he was telling me about that festival thing and the orgy afterwards.”

  “Orgy?” Alex said. “He didn’t mention that to us.”

  “He probably would’ve, given half the chance,” Buck said. “The guy may be old, but he’s a horndog. So are most of the old guys around this place—and most of them are really old.”

  “Buck, did Billy mention whether or not the green-eyed lady statue was on the property?” I said.

  “Nope, but I did hear that there would be a replica of the original statue on display.”

  “Do any of the other guys around here have much to say on the subject of the statue?” I said.

  “No, but Noelle said she’d pay us a visit tonight to share information. She’s staying somewhere on the other side of the swamp… next to the nature trail.”

  “You’d better point it out to us, in case we need to reach her in an emergency,” I said.

  “OK, if you guys are up for it,” Buck said. “And I do mean up for it.”

  “Don’t be so cryptic,” I said.

  “I like to refer to the nature trail as the ‘sex trail,’ and you’ll soon see why,” Buck said with the look and smile of a mischievous little kid.

  -11-

  Sex Trail

  Buck handed me the extra key to our room, which was also on an elastic band, and we left—locking the door behind us. We turned the corner and headed across the dirt road toward a sandy trail, which was under an alley of trees next to a small pond.

  Buck grabbed my arm and spoke in hushed tones. “I forgot to tell you guys, everyone in the camp has been talking about some sort of zombie attack that occurred here last week.”

  “That’s a big thing to forget to tell us,” Alex said.

  “Sorry,” Buck said. “A couple of geezers were—how’d Craig put it… let me think. The guys were already dead he said, but they were sort of resuscitated, or brought back to life; and their eyes were glowing green. What other color would they have been, but green? Anyway, somebody on site had a gun and filled ‘em with bullets before they could hurt anyone.”

  “What’d the police say?” I said, looking up at Buck’s face.

  “Nothing, except the guys were from their morgue. The police are right up the road from here—the main road, not that dirt road. Miss Lucy met with them and got everything hushed up by saying we’d look closer into things here. I just arrived earlier today though, so I haven’t had a chance to look around too much.”

  “Just how tall are you, Buck?” I said.

  “Six-foot-five. Do you think that statue could be on the property, Layton?”

  “Maybe,” I said. “You said they mentioned a replica; and for there to be a replica, there had to be an original. Have you seen any statues around this place?”

  “On the other side of the pond,” Buck said. “But they’re all Greek-looking things. The sort that are made from white plaster or cement—whatever they use.”

  “But the original statue could’ve been painted over or even hidden inside one of those statues,” I said. “We don’t have any idea how big the thing is.”

  Buck laughed and looked down at our cocks.

  “In this place, it’s rare not to know how big things are,” he said.

  I put my hands firmly on Buck’s shoulders, and he cringed.

  “I’m not going to hurt you, Buck; but are you capable of handling this mission?”

  “Can’t a guy have a couple of laughs?” Buck said. “This is kind of a crazy situation.”

  “It is that,” Alex said while checking his camera.

  “Make sure not to point that camera at any of the guys,” Buck said. “They’re uncomfortable around the thing.” He laughed. “I’m talking about the camera, not your thing.”

  “Oh, for Christ’s sake!” I said. “Let’s just get to the nature trail.”

  We started walking on the trail and passed a picnic table to the right. Buck, who walked ahead of us, looked back and ended up tripping over a tree root.

  “Shoot!” Buck said. “I was just going to warn you guys about the tree roots. They’re scattered everywhere on this trail. And since we’re all in flip-flops—be careful not to stub your little toes.”

  “Point taken,” I said.

  Alex looked up at me and smiled. The trail was peaceful, and the pond next to it added to the ambiance. Tree branches overhead blocked out a lot of the sun, making the walk a comfortable one. Alex tapped me on the shoulder and looked toward the right. There was a picnic table and bench there… the table was occupied by two nude men having sex. The stockier of the two looked toward us and spoke.

  “The more the merrier,” he said.

  “Maybe later, dudes,” Buck said.

  They continued what they were doing, and we kept on walking.

  “I see what you meant when you called this a sex trail,” Alex said.

  The next picnic table had a man about my age, but bald, stroking his member and looking at us.

  “Damn, man!” Buck said. “You’re smooth all over.”

  “That’s the way I like it,” the man said.

  “It must be a pain when that hair starts growing back in—especially the pubes.”

  “Nah, I just get a little bitch like you to keep it shaved smooth. I’d be glad to give you a trim.”

  “No thanks,” Buck said.

  I just waved good-bye to the man, and nudged Alex forward.

  “Do you see that guy Craig you mentioned anywhere?” I said to Buck.

  “No, but he said he’d be taking a nap. Check this out.” He pointed right toward the woods. “That land is what they call ‘the swamp.’ It’s only slightly muddy now, so it’s possible to walk on it. It backs up to the house where Noelle is staying; and there’s no fence to worry about.”

  “That’s good to know,” I said.

  We continued walking and passing people on tables, or couples walking by. The path made a circle around the pond. When it turned, the trees thinned out until it opened onto a clear area, where there was a covered rectangular gazebo and several lounge chairs near the pond. I noticed a skinny man sunning himself.

  “Now, that’s what I call a slip n’ slide body,” Buck said. “He’s so skinny and got so much oil on him, a guy would slide right off.”

  There were others around, but Buck pointed us toward a grouping of trees in front of which was a small, white, wooden fence and gate. We followed him through the gate, and found ourselves in a grassy area surrounded by white columns. There were white statues of Greek gods situated in between the columns. Since there was no one else around, Alex started taking pictures.

  “What do we look for?” Buck said. “We can’t exactly bust up these statues.”

  “No, but we can shake them to hear if they rattle, or maybe scratch at the eyes to see if we find emeralds.”

  “Whatever you say, boss,” Buck said, walking to a statue on the left and shaking it on its base.

  I did the same, and also lightly scratched at the eyes with my keys. There were only two statues on each side, so our job was over quickly. When he was done, Buck lay down on the grass. I slipped my flip-flops off and sat down next to him, leaving Alex to continue taking pictures.

  “Buck, I need to know we can count on you here,” I said. “Our style of doing things seems very different; I’m more ex-military and you’re more of a joker; but we need to be able to depend on one another.”

  “My dad’s ex-military—he’s the one who got me this job. I’m not exactly an old pro at this, Layton, but I won’t let my pops down.”

  “OK,” I said. “Hold on a second… is this your first case?”

  “Technically, my second. I assisted in the recovery of another important object once, but there were no zombies involved. You two can count on me—I swear.”

  “That’s good to know,” I said.

  “I’m hungry,” Buck said. “Did you guys bring any snacks?”

  “There’s food in the cooler we brought, but it needs to be microwaved.”

  “That’s cool, there’s a microwave we can use in the clubhouse on the other side of the pool, in front of the big pond.”

  “Alex,” I said, loud enough for him to hear me. “We’re headed back to the room for snacks.”

  “You two go on ahead, I’ll catch up,” Alex said.

  “OK, but watch out for yourself,” I said.

  Buck and I headed back to the room by way of the pool, where a couple of decent looking men were tanning.

  “You’re in good shape, Layton; you must work out a lot,” Buck said.

  “I do my best, Buck.”

  We got to our door, I opened it and bent down to get the cooler. That was when I felt Buck’s hand on my ass. In one quick move, I turned around and twisted his arm behind his back.

  “OK, man!” Buck said. “Oww, stop,”

  “Not until we have an understanding, friend,” I said. “My ass and the rest of me belongs to only one man, and it’s the blond back there taking pictures. You understand.”

  “OK, OK!”

  I let go of his arm, and he sat on the corner of the bed rubbing it—looking like he might cry.

  “I’m sorry, Layton. I haven’t got much experience at this.”

  “How old are you, Buck?”

  “Twenty-five.”

  “Well, you can’t be a virgin.”

  “I’m not,” Buck said. “I just don’t do very well in the whole romance arena.”

  “If you’re using that ‘My name is Buck’ line, I can see why.”

  “My dad’s smooth as silk and beyond cool, but I didn’t inherit any of that.”

  I tried to lighten the mood, since I was actually starting to feel sorry for the clueless, dumb ass in front of me.

  “So your dad’s a real ladies man, huh?”

  “Oh, no way. He and my mom have been together forever, and they’re totally faithful. Hell, they must do it at least twice a day.”

  “That sounds like a lot—and how do you know they’re doing it?”

  “They’re not exactly quiet. I mean, even the servants hear them.”

  “Geez, no wonder you’re so—”

  “So what—say it!”

  “I don’t even know what to say, Buck; but I’ll be honest with you for a minute. You’re a good-looking guy with a great body, but you’re sort of coming across like… I don’t know what. Yeah, I do—you’re kind of a loser nerd trapped in a hunk’s body.”

  “Is that a compliment or an insult?”

  “I’m not sure I know myself… probably some of both.” I pulled a container of food out of the cooler and handed it to Buck, then took out the paper plates and utensils, which Jimmy and Frankie had included. “Go heat that up. As soon as Alex gets here, we’ll join you.”

  “Yes, Sir,” Buck said, looking somewhat dejected.

  * * * *

  “I feel kind of sorry for Buck,” Alex said, when I’d finished telling him what had transpired between Buck and me. “It sounds like he’s living in the shadow of his father. Maybe he’s a kind of man-child type. You do realize we’re going to have to share a room with him tonight.”

  “Maybe, maybe not,” I said. “Let’s get to the clubhouse before he eats all the food.” I took three cans of cola out of the cooler and headed toward the door.

  We walked around the pool and saw the clubhouse, which was also across from the store. Once inside, I could see it was a nice space with tables and chairs. On the back wall was a kitchen area with a sink, refrigerator, and food prep area. I saw Buck sitting at a far table talking with Carl, who walked away before we got there. On the table were three plates with pasta, garlic bread, and salad. A pang of guilt came over me when I noticed that the food had been perfectly divided between the plates, and Buck had waited for us to arrive before eating. It had been wrong of me to think he’d eat it all; and it told me something good about him. Not that I didn’t still think of him as a nerdy hunk, with nerd being the operative word. Alex and I placed the two towels we had with us on the chair seats, as it was the thing to do, and sat down.

  “Carl was here when the zombies showed up last week,” Buck said. “He said it was scary as hell. The guys had been members here, and he didn’t even know they’d died, so he let them right in. Can you imagine that—they just drove in—and they were zombies? He said the minute they walked into the office, he was onto them.”

  I handed Buck a soda, and started eating while he continued talking; Alex was also eating.

  “He said they were all white and dead-looking, but the really freaky thing was how their eyes glowed. It was like they were possessed or something, and he was ready to poop his pants. One zombie guy went after him, but he was able to lock himself in the storage room and use his cell phone to call for help. The other zombie guy was going crazy outside, and some of the camp guys told him afterward that it was like the zombie guy was looking for someone.”

  “Or something,” Alex said.

  “No, that’s the weird thing. The people told Carl that the zombie guy was looking at people as if trying to find someone. He wasn’t looking for a statue or anything, but acting like the one guy, who was trying to get to Carl.”

  “How’d Carl get free?” I said.

  He called one of the permanent residents here, who’s a retired sheriff. The guy and his partner were armed to the teeth and shot the zombies full of lead. They told Carl that the zombies were just like empty vessels, as if they had no souls. Like they were husks being controlled by someone. Strong husks, because the one zombie had knocked down the storage room door and was choking the life out of Carl before his sheriff friend got there. Even full of bullets, the zombie wouldn’t let Carl go. The sheriff had to chop the zombie’s head off. Carl said they had to chop its hands off too, so they could pry the fingers off his throat. That’s some scary stuff.” He started eating his food.

  “These zombies sound interesting,” Alex said. “It’s not like they’re actual movie monsters, saying ‘brains’ before eating brains or anything. Miss Lucy also told us that it’s as if dead bodies are being reanimated, at least long enough to be used as killing machines.”

  “I thought Billy owned the place,” I said. “Did he sell it to Carl? Because, I’d think the zombies would be after the owner.”

  “Oh, Carl doesn’t own this place,” Buck said. “He and his partner only run it. Old man Billy inherited it from his partner, and it’s all his; he just needs people to help run things.”

  “The zombies have to be after the statue of the green-eyed lady,” I said.

  “But why try and kill anybody when they could probably just take the thing?” Buck said.

  “Because they probably don’t know where the statue is,” Alex said. “We’re probably not the first people to come here looking for it.”

  “That makes sense,” Buck said. “Yum, this food hits the spot, where’d you guys get it?”

  “A friend of ours has a restaurant in Mt Ore.”

  We talked until we’d finished eating, then Buck stood up.

  “I think I’ll sit by the pool and check out the view—if there’s anything worth viewing, while I wait for my food to settle. While there, I’ll see if I can find out anything else. Noelle won’t be by until late tonight—around midnight or so.”

 

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