Promise Me, page 7
We go back to an uncomfortable silence, interspersed with the occasional question about my job and what I'll be wearing to the reunion. It's not until my dad comes strolling in a few minutes later to eat his breakfast in his golf clothes that I'm able to relax again.
After breakfast, my dad kisses us both goodbye and heads out to meet a couple of his buddies for a round of golf. My mom and I then try to decide on our plans for the day. "What about coming with me to the museum in Philly?" I ask her.
"I was thinking more along the lines of doing some shopping at The Village, and then maybe grabbing a late lunch at The Back Porch Cafe. It is Friday, so it might be a bit crowded, but I think you'll have a good time."
"Sounds good," I agree, resigning myself to the fact that my visit to the museum is not looking too good at this point. Oh well, maybe one day next week, since my flight isn't until Thursday morning, all thanks to Julia, I say to myself then step into the bathroom to start getting ready for my day of shopping.
A few hours later I find myself in yet another specialty shop. This time it's cookware and baking needs. I guess if I was a chef or enjoyed cooking even in the slightest I'd be pretty psyched right about now. At least it's a step up from the previous store that specialized in dreamcatchers, nothing but.
"Mom, aren't you getting tired of shopping?" I ask as I eyeball a retro diner style salt and pepper shaker.
"Not really," she says and continues to search for that ever elusive item that must be bought before she realizes that she really doesn't need it. "Are you getting hungry?"
My stomach answers with a growl before I can actually respond. My mom laughs out loud and puts down a pair of ridiculous looking oven mitts that have a picture of all the stars of the Food Network on them. She hooks her arm in mine and leads me towards the front door and we step outside. The cafe we had planned on having lunch at is just a block of stores ahead.
About half way through our trek, my mom stops suddenly. Since our arms are hooked together, her stopping causes me to falter a bit when I try to keep on walking without her moving.
"Mom, what's the matter? I thought the cafe was further down this way," I say pointing directly ahead of us.
She slowly pulls her arm out of mine, and points with vigor to the left at two women who are browsing and giggling at items in a storefront window. One of them is easily recognizable since I just ran into her the night before, Lauren, AKA gossip hound. The other woman, I can't easily determine the identity of, so I roll my eyes and turn my attention back to my mother who is still standing there staring, and from the looks of it getting -dare I say- pissed off.
"Mom, just ignore her, I can handle Lauren. Let's go, I'm starving." As I attempt one more time at moving my mom, the other woman turns around and I see for the first time in ten years my arch nemesis, Lisa.
For the most part she looks the same, except that she's put on some weight, I assume from the two pregnancies. She's changed the color of her hair from mousy brown, to mousy brown with highlights. She's dressed rather nicely, upscale even, causing me to think that Chris must be doing well enough for her to afford the clothes and accessories she's wearing. When she starts her casual approach towards us, I can tell that she's wearing a bit too much make up for a casual Friday stroll in a shopping mall. Lauren is almost ready to combust with excitement as she follows Lisa over like a dog on a leash. I have to laugh, remembering how much Lisa used to hate Lauren and all her gossiping. Yet, right here in front of me, they are like two peas in a pod. My, how things change.
I'm not nervous, anxious, or scared of this moment that I've been dreading for so long. I'm ready as I'll ever be. Momentarily forgetting that she now knows everything, I glance to my left and see my mom is ready to pounce. One thing about my mom is that you shouldn't cross her; she will never forget or forgive. A big grin comes across my face and I cross my arms over my chest as I wait to watch the sparks fly. This is going to be good.
"Hi Sabrina, Mrs. Chandler, how nice to run into you today," she says and pulls her mouth into the most artificial smile I've ever seen. It turns my stomach and I have to bite my lip to keep my emotions in check because surprisingly, I feel the need to spit in her face, so out of character for me. Lauren is right next to her "friend" and is watching me closely waiting for me to say something, anything.
I plaster a smile on my face and quite cheerfully respond, "Hi Lisa, it's been a long time hasn't it."
"Yes, it has. I got your number from your mom and just kept forgetting to call you. But, now that you're here...," and she stops but I can tell she's thinking about something clever to say, but my mom starts her attack.
"Lisa, would you just shut up!"
I knew my mom would go for the jugular, but I'm still shocked. My head turns back to Lisa and then back to my mom. Lauren is doing the same thing. It's like we're in the front row at a tennis match at the U.S. Open.
"How dare you talk to me like that?"
My mom laughs and then steps in closer, takes her index finger and waves it in Lisa's face before she can say another lie.
"Just stop lying already. We all know you're trying to save face in front of your friend here and you did call Sabrina in Miami, and that you told her to stay away."
"Well I didn't know all that," Lauren says out of nowhere. My mom promptly gives Lauren a dismissing look before turning her attention back to Lisa.
"For years, I've been making my daughter feel guilty because of you. All this time I've been trying to get her to make amends with you. And all this time, it's been nothing but a lie." She pauses, takes my hand in hers and continues, "Lisa, you should be ashamed of yourself. Prancing around here like your shit doesn't stink. Well guess what, it stinks to high heaven! Do yourself a favor and don't you dare show your face around me again. If you see me coming, turn in the other direction because you make me sick." With that, my mom pulls me to the left, sidestepping Lisa and Lauren. "I'm starving, let's go."
While she pulls me along for a few steps, I turn my head around to take one last look at the shocked expression on Lisa's face and the devilish grin on Lauren's. I wave at them both, smile and say, "See you tomorrow night at the reunion." I turn my head back to my mom who is on a mission to make it to our original destination before we were thwarted by Tweedledee and Tweedledumb.
"Mom, that was awesome."
"It was, wasn't it?"
We both start giggling like school girls and eventually make our way to the cafe where we eat a late lunch and then head home for the night.
I'm not even the slightest bit nervous. How is that possible? I've stressed over this moment for months now. What I would do? What I would say? Now, facing myself in the mirror dressed for the reunion, I'm not worried. The only thing left to conquer is whether I'll see Tyler there and I can't think too much over that since the trip so far has been a success. I mean, it would be like gravy if he were to show up, but really, I'm okay with it if he doesn't. Having been able to confront not only Chris but Lisa as well has been, as cliché as it sounds, cathartic.
Wow, Julia was so right; the shoes are amazing and go perfectly with my dress, which looks like it was made for me. I'm going to take that girl out for a night on the town for convincing me to pick this one. After putting the finishing touches on my hair, which I've decided to wear in a low, loose bun with side swept bangs, I put in my diamond studs. I take one last look at myself, more than satisfied with the reflection smiling back at me, and head out for the reunion.
The drive there takes all of fifteen minutes. Probably would have taken me ten if it wasn't so difficult trying to maneuver the gas and brake pedals with the Louboutin's. Pulling into the parking lot of the Skippack Golf Club at approximately 6:15 PM, I pat myself on the back for arriving fashionably late, as per my mom's advice. I walk through the front doors of the building and see a sign that leads me towards the correct ballroom. The music and chatter gets closer and closer until I finally cross the threshold and take a moment to canvas the entire room.
Our school colors were purple and white and it seems like someone got the memo and then some. Purple and white helium balloons are floating on the ceiling, purple and white streamers cascading the walls, and finally, purple and white tablecloths. There are two bars strategically placed on the far corners of the room and flank the barely filled hardwood dance floor. On the stage area sits a DJ with his turntable who is already being harassed by guests for requests.
It takes about ten seconds for me to spot Chris and Lisa, holding court at a table. Chris is smiling but it looks forced, while Lisa is speaking to a few of the other guests enthusiastically. I start to walk slowly into the room and try to make my way to bar. At the same time I'm looking for Tyler. So far he's not here, but that doesn't surprise me. I remember my conversation with Julia the day she convinced me to come where I'd told her that he didn't seem like the kind of guy that would come to these kinds of things. I should have made a monetary wager on it. I smile at the thought and finally make it to the bar. While waiting on my glass of wine, a few people I knew stop to say hello and engage me in conversation.
It's funny how people can change over the course of ten years. Other people not so much. I continue to sip on my drink and talk casually to fellow 2001 graduates until I notice that I'm in need of a refill. Excusing myself, I get to the bar to order another glass of wine when Chris appears next to me. Actually, so close to me that I don't have enough room to pull a dollar bill out of my clutch to tip the bartender. I ask him as politely as possible if he can back off, to which he responds, "I need to talk to you, please Sabrina."
I can smell the alcohol all over him. He's hammered. He takes a step back and goes to grab my hand to pull me towards him. I yank it back forcefully.
"Chris, we have nothing to say to each other, please just leave me alone."
He hangs his head and starts to loosen the tie he's wearing. "I need to tell you how sorry I am. My God, Sabrina, I wish I could take it all back. I don't love her, I've never loved her."
I stare at him for a second because honestly, I'm so over him and his apology that is ten years too late that I want to make sure I get the next thing I say completely right so he can just leave. Before I can open my mouth, I barely make out that he's saying something else. It doesn't help that his words are starting to sound slurred at this point either. So, I lean in closer to hear him say, "She tricked me. I was trying to get away from her but then she told me she was pregnant. Then there was a baby coming and I was stuck. I tried to leave her but she tricked me."
I really don't care. I have to admit that I'm surprised at this revelation; I've come to terms with all of this, and it feels so good. There honestly isn't anything else they can tell me or do to me that makes one iota of difference. I'll be leaving for Miami, while they will be stuck with each other in their "relationship". This seems to be penance enough from all indications. I sigh and tell him this in not so many words, "I really don't care anymore, Chris."
"You don't get it. I tried to leave her to go back to you. I loved you, I still do."
With that, I've had enough of his drunken ramblings. I look him in the eyes and tell him he's pathetic before I grab my wine glass and bump into a few bodies on my way outside to get some fresh air.
There are a few other people out here, smokers mostly. Since I don't smoke I just meander my way towards a gazebo about thirty feet away that looks to be unoccupied at the moment. I just want some peace and quiet before I go back in there.
I pace around the confines of the gazebo for a while sipping my wine until my cell phone vibrates in my clutch that is under my left arm. Now what? I skillfully take the phone out of the clutch while still holding onto my wine glass. I see that it's Julia calling and answer as I'm putting the clutch back under my arm.
"Hey girlie," she says, "I was hoping to call you earlier to wish you luck, but I was stuck in a last minute meeting."
"Thanks. I'm actually already here."
"And?" She says, drawing the word out, "Come on, the suspense is killing me."
I'm in no rush to get back inside and I can feel the effects of the alcohol by now so I walk her through the events of the last couple of days. Every so often she interrupts me with the following commentary: "Holy shit! You've got be kidding me! What a piece of garbage! I can't believe that whore tried to pretend nothing was up!" Finally ending with, "You're mom is my new hero!"
"Yeah, mine too. It was pretty awesome, you would have loved it," I say to her while glancing up at the building to see some more people milling about the entrance.
She stays silent for a moment before she states more then asks, "So, he's not there, huh."
"Doesn't look that way, no."
"I'm sorry. Are you ok, sweetie?"
I ponder her question for a second, really thinking about it. Yes, I'm okay with it. I say as much to her, and she's doubtful of my response. I try to explain that even though this originally started out as a way to see Tyler again, it turned out to be something more. Something that I should have done years ago. I needed to see Chris and Lisa. I needed to have closure to move on with my life. Although it would have been even more closure, so to speak, seeing him after all these years. Regardless, I feel like for the first time in my life I can stop doubting myself.
"Wow, I'm impressed, Sabrina. Who would have thought that going to a ten year reunion would be like going through a lifetime of therapy sessions."
"Ha ha," I say sarcastically while looking down at my red painted toes that are peeking out of my shoes. "In all seriousness, I'm good. I'm going to go back in a few minutes and have a bite to eat. Plus, my wine glass is looking for a refill." I pause and ask her how she's doing then drink the last vestiges of my glass.
I'm still looking down at my toes and wiggling them when I hear footsteps coming closer. Julia's going on in my ear about some new client and their ridiculous demands as a pair of men's black dress shoes comes into my view.
"Sabrina."
His smooth voice wraps around me like a silk blanket, causing every nerve ending on my body to stand up and take attention. Somewhere in the back of my mind I'm cognizant of the fact that Julia's still talking, but I can't be sure. Quite frankly, I have no idea if she's asking me a question or waiting for me to say something. Either way, I couldn't string a sentence together right now if I tried. My heart is in my throat as my eyes start a lazy trail from his feet up his body.
He's wearing black tailored dress pants that fall perfectly on his hips, but not before I notice the muscular legs shifting underneath the fabric. His black button down dress shirt is tucked in and held in place with a black leather belt with a simple, yet effective, silver square buckle. The shirt sleeves are rolled up revealing the elusive tattoo on his right forearm that I've dreamt about for years. His right hand is holding a beer bottle and I follow it to its destination when he brings it up to his mouth.
Finally reaching his face, those eyes, chocolate as ever, have a hint of mischief behind them. His dark brown hair is not too short, with a few strands hitting his brow. It has that "I'm trying to look like I don't care about my hair so I just run my hands through it" look. It works… well, since all I want to do is run my fingers through it. As he licks his lips after taking a swig of his beer, he grins.
I'm robbed of the ability to speak, but somehow, of all the things I could possibly say at this momentous occasion, I manage to say under my breath, "Holy, fucking shit."
He actually laughs out loud at the fact that the first thing out of my mouth to him after ten years are curse words. Great.
"Sabrina! What the hell is going on," Julia says in my ear in a panic. Quickly pointing out that I don't curse normally and breaking me out of my spell, I remember that she's still on the phone.
"Gotta go, Julia."
"Wait, are you ok?"
"Yes, totally ok, gotta run."
"Oh my God, he's there," she screams in my ear so loud and I'm sure Tyler can hear her since he's chuckling at the scene playing out before him.
"Seriously, gotta run, I'll call you tomorrow."
"Don't you dare hang up on me. Please tell me two things," she pleads.
I'm already making an ass of myself, might as well prolong it. "Make it quick," I tell her.
She asks the next two questions so quietly that I'm barely able to hear her ask, "How hot and is there a wedding ring?"
I look at Tyler's left ring finger, and quickly answer her, "Super, and no."
She's squealing like a little girl when I hang up on her and see Tyler taking another sip of his beer. This time when he pulls it back from his lips, he takes a step forward while I pull my clutch from under my arm and shove the phone back inside, but not before I turn off the ringer completely. He tilts his head to the left slightly making a stray lock of hair fall into his eyes, which are making a trail from mine to my feet and back up again. I swear that I can almost feel his hands on me as this happens, and it causes me to squirm. He chuckles at my reaction before he finally says, "I was hoping I'd see you here."
Did he really just say that out loud or was it possibly my imagination? I want to pinch myself to make sure this is all real, or better yet, reach out and touch him to make sure this isn't all in my head. I take a deep breath and try to regain my composure and think for a second before I say something else that will make me look more like a moron than I already do.
"Hi, Tyler," I breathe as smoothly as I can muster, dragging some loose hair behind my ear.
His lips curl up on one side into that sexy smile that looks exactly the same as I remember it. "Would you like to come back inside with me?" He asks then glances down at the empty wine glass between us before he looks back into my eyes. "You need another drink."
"Yes."
I start to walk out of the gazebo as he falls in step next to me and places his left hand lightly on my back. It startles me since I can feel his fingers touching my bare skin because my dress has no material back there. I turn my head slightly to look up at him to find him grinning, and I smile as I adjust the hair behind my ear again. He opens the door for me and when I make my way through it, he grabs hold of my hand. I stop and look from our interlaced fingers to his face as he leans down and whispers, "Don't be nervous." He pauses then adds, "I won't bite, I promise."
After breakfast, my dad kisses us both goodbye and heads out to meet a couple of his buddies for a round of golf. My mom and I then try to decide on our plans for the day. "What about coming with me to the museum in Philly?" I ask her.
"I was thinking more along the lines of doing some shopping at The Village, and then maybe grabbing a late lunch at The Back Porch Cafe. It is Friday, so it might be a bit crowded, but I think you'll have a good time."
"Sounds good," I agree, resigning myself to the fact that my visit to the museum is not looking too good at this point. Oh well, maybe one day next week, since my flight isn't until Thursday morning, all thanks to Julia, I say to myself then step into the bathroom to start getting ready for my day of shopping.
A few hours later I find myself in yet another specialty shop. This time it's cookware and baking needs. I guess if I was a chef or enjoyed cooking even in the slightest I'd be pretty psyched right about now. At least it's a step up from the previous store that specialized in dreamcatchers, nothing but.
"Mom, aren't you getting tired of shopping?" I ask as I eyeball a retro diner style salt and pepper shaker.
"Not really," she says and continues to search for that ever elusive item that must be bought before she realizes that she really doesn't need it. "Are you getting hungry?"
My stomach answers with a growl before I can actually respond. My mom laughs out loud and puts down a pair of ridiculous looking oven mitts that have a picture of all the stars of the Food Network on them. She hooks her arm in mine and leads me towards the front door and we step outside. The cafe we had planned on having lunch at is just a block of stores ahead.
About half way through our trek, my mom stops suddenly. Since our arms are hooked together, her stopping causes me to falter a bit when I try to keep on walking without her moving.
"Mom, what's the matter? I thought the cafe was further down this way," I say pointing directly ahead of us.
She slowly pulls her arm out of mine, and points with vigor to the left at two women who are browsing and giggling at items in a storefront window. One of them is easily recognizable since I just ran into her the night before, Lauren, AKA gossip hound. The other woman, I can't easily determine the identity of, so I roll my eyes and turn my attention back to my mother who is still standing there staring, and from the looks of it getting -dare I say- pissed off.
"Mom, just ignore her, I can handle Lauren. Let's go, I'm starving." As I attempt one more time at moving my mom, the other woman turns around and I see for the first time in ten years my arch nemesis, Lisa.
For the most part she looks the same, except that she's put on some weight, I assume from the two pregnancies. She's changed the color of her hair from mousy brown, to mousy brown with highlights. She's dressed rather nicely, upscale even, causing me to think that Chris must be doing well enough for her to afford the clothes and accessories she's wearing. When she starts her casual approach towards us, I can tell that she's wearing a bit too much make up for a casual Friday stroll in a shopping mall. Lauren is almost ready to combust with excitement as she follows Lisa over like a dog on a leash. I have to laugh, remembering how much Lisa used to hate Lauren and all her gossiping. Yet, right here in front of me, they are like two peas in a pod. My, how things change.
I'm not nervous, anxious, or scared of this moment that I've been dreading for so long. I'm ready as I'll ever be. Momentarily forgetting that she now knows everything, I glance to my left and see my mom is ready to pounce. One thing about my mom is that you shouldn't cross her; she will never forget or forgive. A big grin comes across my face and I cross my arms over my chest as I wait to watch the sparks fly. This is going to be good.
"Hi Sabrina, Mrs. Chandler, how nice to run into you today," she says and pulls her mouth into the most artificial smile I've ever seen. It turns my stomach and I have to bite my lip to keep my emotions in check because surprisingly, I feel the need to spit in her face, so out of character for me. Lauren is right next to her "friend" and is watching me closely waiting for me to say something, anything.
I plaster a smile on my face and quite cheerfully respond, "Hi Lisa, it's been a long time hasn't it."
"Yes, it has. I got your number from your mom and just kept forgetting to call you. But, now that you're here...," and she stops but I can tell she's thinking about something clever to say, but my mom starts her attack.
"Lisa, would you just shut up!"
I knew my mom would go for the jugular, but I'm still shocked. My head turns back to Lisa and then back to my mom. Lauren is doing the same thing. It's like we're in the front row at a tennis match at the U.S. Open.
"How dare you talk to me like that?"
My mom laughs and then steps in closer, takes her index finger and waves it in Lisa's face before she can say another lie.
"Just stop lying already. We all know you're trying to save face in front of your friend here and you did call Sabrina in Miami, and that you told her to stay away."
"Well I didn't know all that," Lauren says out of nowhere. My mom promptly gives Lauren a dismissing look before turning her attention back to Lisa.
"For years, I've been making my daughter feel guilty because of you. All this time I've been trying to get her to make amends with you. And all this time, it's been nothing but a lie." She pauses, takes my hand in hers and continues, "Lisa, you should be ashamed of yourself. Prancing around here like your shit doesn't stink. Well guess what, it stinks to high heaven! Do yourself a favor and don't you dare show your face around me again. If you see me coming, turn in the other direction because you make me sick." With that, my mom pulls me to the left, sidestepping Lisa and Lauren. "I'm starving, let's go."
While she pulls me along for a few steps, I turn my head around to take one last look at the shocked expression on Lisa's face and the devilish grin on Lauren's. I wave at them both, smile and say, "See you tomorrow night at the reunion." I turn my head back to my mom who is on a mission to make it to our original destination before we were thwarted by Tweedledee and Tweedledumb.
"Mom, that was awesome."
"It was, wasn't it?"
We both start giggling like school girls and eventually make our way to the cafe where we eat a late lunch and then head home for the night.
I'm not even the slightest bit nervous. How is that possible? I've stressed over this moment for months now. What I would do? What I would say? Now, facing myself in the mirror dressed for the reunion, I'm not worried. The only thing left to conquer is whether I'll see Tyler there and I can't think too much over that since the trip so far has been a success. I mean, it would be like gravy if he were to show up, but really, I'm okay with it if he doesn't. Having been able to confront not only Chris but Lisa as well has been, as cliché as it sounds, cathartic.
Wow, Julia was so right; the shoes are amazing and go perfectly with my dress, which looks like it was made for me. I'm going to take that girl out for a night on the town for convincing me to pick this one. After putting the finishing touches on my hair, which I've decided to wear in a low, loose bun with side swept bangs, I put in my diamond studs. I take one last look at myself, more than satisfied with the reflection smiling back at me, and head out for the reunion.
The drive there takes all of fifteen minutes. Probably would have taken me ten if it wasn't so difficult trying to maneuver the gas and brake pedals with the Louboutin's. Pulling into the parking lot of the Skippack Golf Club at approximately 6:15 PM, I pat myself on the back for arriving fashionably late, as per my mom's advice. I walk through the front doors of the building and see a sign that leads me towards the correct ballroom. The music and chatter gets closer and closer until I finally cross the threshold and take a moment to canvas the entire room.
Our school colors were purple and white and it seems like someone got the memo and then some. Purple and white helium balloons are floating on the ceiling, purple and white streamers cascading the walls, and finally, purple and white tablecloths. There are two bars strategically placed on the far corners of the room and flank the barely filled hardwood dance floor. On the stage area sits a DJ with his turntable who is already being harassed by guests for requests.
It takes about ten seconds for me to spot Chris and Lisa, holding court at a table. Chris is smiling but it looks forced, while Lisa is speaking to a few of the other guests enthusiastically. I start to walk slowly into the room and try to make my way to bar. At the same time I'm looking for Tyler. So far he's not here, but that doesn't surprise me. I remember my conversation with Julia the day she convinced me to come where I'd told her that he didn't seem like the kind of guy that would come to these kinds of things. I should have made a monetary wager on it. I smile at the thought and finally make it to the bar. While waiting on my glass of wine, a few people I knew stop to say hello and engage me in conversation.
It's funny how people can change over the course of ten years. Other people not so much. I continue to sip on my drink and talk casually to fellow 2001 graduates until I notice that I'm in need of a refill. Excusing myself, I get to the bar to order another glass of wine when Chris appears next to me. Actually, so close to me that I don't have enough room to pull a dollar bill out of my clutch to tip the bartender. I ask him as politely as possible if he can back off, to which he responds, "I need to talk to you, please Sabrina."
I can smell the alcohol all over him. He's hammered. He takes a step back and goes to grab my hand to pull me towards him. I yank it back forcefully.
"Chris, we have nothing to say to each other, please just leave me alone."
He hangs his head and starts to loosen the tie he's wearing. "I need to tell you how sorry I am. My God, Sabrina, I wish I could take it all back. I don't love her, I've never loved her."
I stare at him for a second because honestly, I'm so over him and his apology that is ten years too late that I want to make sure I get the next thing I say completely right so he can just leave. Before I can open my mouth, I barely make out that he's saying something else. It doesn't help that his words are starting to sound slurred at this point either. So, I lean in closer to hear him say, "She tricked me. I was trying to get away from her but then she told me she was pregnant. Then there was a baby coming and I was stuck. I tried to leave her but she tricked me."
I really don't care. I have to admit that I'm surprised at this revelation; I've come to terms with all of this, and it feels so good. There honestly isn't anything else they can tell me or do to me that makes one iota of difference. I'll be leaving for Miami, while they will be stuck with each other in their "relationship". This seems to be penance enough from all indications. I sigh and tell him this in not so many words, "I really don't care anymore, Chris."
"You don't get it. I tried to leave her to go back to you. I loved you, I still do."
With that, I've had enough of his drunken ramblings. I look him in the eyes and tell him he's pathetic before I grab my wine glass and bump into a few bodies on my way outside to get some fresh air.
There are a few other people out here, smokers mostly. Since I don't smoke I just meander my way towards a gazebo about thirty feet away that looks to be unoccupied at the moment. I just want some peace and quiet before I go back in there.
I pace around the confines of the gazebo for a while sipping my wine until my cell phone vibrates in my clutch that is under my left arm. Now what? I skillfully take the phone out of the clutch while still holding onto my wine glass. I see that it's Julia calling and answer as I'm putting the clutch back under my arm.
"Hey girlie," she says, "I was hoping to call you earlier to wish you luck, but I was stuck in a last minute meeting."
"Thanks. I'm actually already here."
"And?" She says, drawing the word out, "Come on, the suspense is killing me."
I'm in no rush to get back inside and I can feel the effects of the alcohol by now so I walk her through the events of the last couple of days. Every so often she interrupts me with the following commentary: "Holy shit! You've got be kidding me! What a piece of garbage! I can't believe that whore tried to pretend nothing was up!" Finally ending with, "You're mom is my new hero!"
"Yeah, mine too. It was pretty awesome, you would have loved it," I say to her while glancing up at the building to see some more people milling about the entrance.
She stays silent for a moment before she states more then asks, "So, he's not there, huh."
"Doesn't look that way, no."
"I'm sorry. Are you ok, sweetie?"
I ponder her question for a second, really thinking about it. Yes, I'm okay with it. I say as much to her, and she's doubtful of my response. I try to explain that even though this originally started out as a way to see Tyler again, it turned out to be something more. Something that I should have done years ago. I needed to see Chris and Lisa. I needed to have closure to move on with my life. Although it would have been even more closure, so to speak, seeing him after all these years. Regardless, I feel like for the first time in my life I can stop doubting myself.
"Wow, I'm impressed, Sabrina. Who would have thought that going to a ten year reunion would be like going through a lifetime of therapy sessions."
"Ha ha," I say sarcastically while looking down at my red painted toes that are peeking out of my shoes. "In all seriousness, I'm good. I'm going to go back in a few minutes and have a bite to eat. Plus, my wine glass is looking for a refill." I pause and ask her how she's doing then drink the last vestiges of my glass.
I'm still looking down at my toes and wiggling them when I hear footsteps coming closer. Julia's going on in my ear about some new client and their ridiculous demands as a pair of men's black dress shoes comes into my view.
"Sabrina."
His smooth voice wraps around me like a silk blanket, causing every nerve ending on my body to stand up and take attention. Somewhere in the back of my mind I'm cognizant of the fact that Julia's still talking, but I can't be sure. Quite frankly, I have no idea if she's asking me a question or waiting for me to say something. Either way, I couldn't string a sentence together right now if I tried. My heart is in my throat as my eyes start a lazy trail from his feet up his body.
He's wearing black tailored dress pants that fall perfectly on his hips, but not before I notice the muscular legs shifting underneath the fabric. His black button down dress shirt is tucked in and held in place with a black leather belt with a simple, yet effective, silver square buckle. The shirt sleeves are rolled up revealing the elusive tattoo on his right forearm that I've dreamt about for years. His right hand is holding a beer bottle and I follow it to its destination when he brings it up to his mouth.
Finally reaching his face, those eyes, chocolate as ever, have a hint of mischief behind them. His dark brown hair is not too short, with a few strands hitting his brow. It has that "I'm trying to look like I don't care about my hair so I just run my hands through it" look. It works… well, since all I want to do is run my fingers through it. As he licks his lips after taking a swig of his beer, he grins.
I'm robbed of the ability to speak, but somehow, of all the things I could possibly say at this momentous occasion, I manage to say under my breath, "Holy, fucking shit."
He actually laughs out loud at the fact that the first thing out of my mouth to him after ten years are curse words. Great.
"Sabrina! What the hell is going on," Julia says in my ear in a panic. Quickly pointing out that I don't curse normally and breaking me out of my spell, I remember that she's still on the phone.
"Gotta go, Julia."
"Wait, are you ok?"
"Yes, totally ok, gotta run."
"Oh my God, he's there," she screams in my ear so loud and I'm sure Tyler can hear her since he's chuckling at the scene playing out before him.
"Seriously, gotta run, I'll call you tomorrow."
"Don't you dare hang up on me. Please tell me two things," she pleads.
I'm already making an ass of myself, might as well prolong it. "Make it quick," I tell her.
She asks the next two questions so quietly that I'm barely able to hear her ask, "How hot and is there a wedding ring?"
I look at Tyler's left ring finger, and quickly answer her, "Super, and no."
She's squealing like a little girl when I hang up on her and see Tyler taking another sip of his beer. This time when he pulls it back from his lips, he takes a step forward while I pull my clutch from under my arm and shove the phone back inside, but not before I turn off the ringer completely. He tilts his head to the left slightly making a stray lock of hair fall into his eyes, which are making a trail from mine to my feet and back up again. I swear that I can almost feel his hands on me as this happens, and it causes me to squirm. He chuckles at my reaction before he finally says, "I was hoping I'd see you here."
Did he really just say that out loud or was it possibly my imagination? I want to pinch myself to make sure this is all real, or better yet, reach out and touch him to make sure this isn't all in my head. I take a deep breath and try to regain my composure and think for a second before I say something else that will make me look more like a moron than I already do.
"Hi, Tyler," I breathe as smoothly as I can muster, dragging some loose hair behind my ear.
His lips curl up on one side into that sexy smile that looks exactly the same as I remember it. "Would you like to come back inside with me?" He asks then glances down at the empty wine glass between us before he looks back into my eyes. "You need another drink."
"Yes."
I start to walk out of the gazebo as he falls in step next to me and places his left hand lightly on my back. It startles me since I can feel his fingers touching my bare skin because my dress has no material back there. I turn my head slightly to look up at him to find him grinning, and I smile as I adjust the hair behind my ear again. He opens the door for me and when I make my way through it, he grabs hold of my hand. I stop and look from our interlaced fingers to his face as he leans down and whispers, "Don't be nervous." He pauses then adds, "I won't bite, I promise."
