The Sinister Silhouette-D2D, page 28
When I bring the sponge back up her legs, I bypass her pussy, not wanting to torture myself and figuring she can take care of that part, but her hand stops me. I jerk my gaze to hers to see her biting her lip again, uncertainty and pure desperation in her eyes.
“Please,” she whispers brokenly. “I need to wash his touch off me.”
Indecision wars within me. This is wrong. It doesn’t feel right to do what she’s asking of me, I shouldn’t touch her after what Theo did to her, but I understand her need to rid herself of all reminders of him.
When a single tear slides down her cheek and she widens her legs a few inches, I can’t not do what she’s asking. I pull in a lungful of air and it whooshes out in a rush.
I look back down and move the sponge between her legs. Her body jolts once, but other than that she stands still. Her hand is still on mine, helping guide me, and it makes me feel fractionally better knowing I’m not doing this alone. I make sure it’s only the sponge touching her and not my fingers. This is only to clean her, nothing more.
Her free hand grips my shoulder as her other hand puts pressure on mine. She works the sponge back and forth over her sensitive flesh in almost a frantic movement. She applies even more pressure, and I frown, because I know it can’t be comfortable. She makes a noise in the back of her throat, and at first I think she’s enjoying the friction and she’s moaning in pleasure, but when I look up at face, her eyes are closed, and her expression is twisted into a mask of pain.
When I try to pull the sponge away, her grip on my hand tightens and her movements become frenzied.
“Jules.” I call her name, my throat tight at seeing her anguish. Her eyes remain closed, so I call her name again and put a stop to both of our hands. “Jules. Look at me.” I strengthen my voice.
Her eyes spring open and the amount of despair in their depths would bring me to my knees if I wasn’t already on them.
“I just need it to go away,” she cries, and tries to force my hand to move again.
I stand and take the sponge away from her, dropping it to the shower floor.
“Stop it, baby. You’re fucking killing me here.” And she is. I can’t fucking stand her hurting herself to try to get rid of the feeling of his hands on her. It makes me want to scream bloody murder and find Theo and beat the shit out of him until there’s no part of him that’s recognizable.
I cup her cheeks and bring her face toward me, planting a soft kiss against her trembling lips.
“He’ll never touch you again. Never come near you again.” I pull back so she can see the truth on my face. “I swear, Jules. Never fucking again.”
Her arms band around my neck and she plasters her chest to mine. My arms go around her slim waist, and I bring her in tighter. I can feel her erratic heartbeat against my chest and the slight tremors in her body. Her silent cries shred pieces of my soul.
I don’t know how long I hold her. Time doesn’t matter. The only thing that does is making her feel safe again and taking away her pain and heartache. I’d do anything to take her anguish upon myself. I try my damndest to absorb it into my body and give her my warmth and my strength.
Her cries become whimpers and after a while she pulls back. Neither of us talk as I grab the shampoo and wash her hair. Her eyes close when I tip her head back to rinse out the white foam. I smooth conditioner in the long strands and rinse that as well.
I gently move her to the side and step underneath the warm water. After filling the sponge with more body wash, I hurriedly run it over my body. She crosses her arms over her chest as she watches me. I don’t know if it’s to cover herself or if she’s cold from not being under the warm water. I squirt shampoo in the palm of my hand and quickly run it through my hair. Closing my eyes, I tip my head back to rinse.
When I lift my head again and open my eyes, I’m surprised to see Jules has moved closer to me. Her gaze isn’t directed at my face, but rather my cock. It wilted with her need to roughly scrub between her legs, but with her eyes pinned in that direction, feeling like a soft caress, my dick comes back to life. And the bastard jumps when she licks her lips.
Motherfucker.
“Jules….”
My words die when she lifts her head and closes the gap between us. She wraps her arms around my neck and pulls my head down, sealing our lips together. My initial reaction is a groan, because she tastes so fucking good. My hands go to her hips to push her away—me mauling her is the last thing she needs—but when her moan enters my mouth, I end up pulling her closer. My body acts of its own accord. One hand tangles in her hair, while the other arm wraps fully around her back. Her tits, with their hard little peaks, smash against my chest, and I’m in fucking heaven. She’s soft and sweet and feels so goddamn perfect in my arms.
My cock, which is pressed against her stomach, aches fiercely. I’ve been hard over this woman for weeks, and no matter how many times I’ve jacked off to the image of her, it’s never enough.
But no matter how much I want her, no matter how much my body screams for the relief I know only she can give it, now is not the time. She just went through a tragic experience at the hands of my twin brother. Quite frankly, I’m surprised she can stand to look at me. With everything I’ve done in the past aside, Theo’s actions, and he and I sharing the same face.... How can she look at me and not see him?
With more strength than I knew I was capable of, I pull my lips from hers.
“Baby, we can’t do this.”
She frowns and the tiny crease between her eyes torments me. I want to give her everything she asks from me, but she’s not thinking straight right now. The first time I take her I want her mind solely on me, not on my brother or what he did to her.
“But I want to, Luca.” She leans forward and kisses the center of my chest, snaking her hand down between us to grip my cock.
“Fuck,” I hiss, and throw back my head.
The pleasure is too great, and I’m momentarily frozen for a second as she smoothly slides her hand up and down my shaft a few times. Against all my basic instincts, I grip her hand and make her stop, bringing her palm to lie flat over my chest.
“You don’t know what you’re asking, Jules,” I tell her roughly. “You’re scared and vulnerable right now, and not ready for this.”
Her fingers curl against my chest and she looks at me with imploring eyes. “I do know what I’m asking. I’m asking you to make love to me. Yes, I’m scared, and I may be vulnerable right now, but I know with 100 percent certainty that I want you.”
I close my eyes and rest my head against hers, my resolve slowly cracking, but knowing it may be a mistake we’ll both regret if I give in.
“I can’t—” I break off and take a deep breath. I open my eyes. “I can’t take that chance with you. It’ll fucking break me if you regret it later,” I finish hoarsely.
She grabs my face and brings it down to hers, where she places a single soft kiss against my lips before pulling back. We gaze deeply into each other’s eyes.
“I’m going to tell you something, and I want you to listen carefully. What Theo did to me was horrible, and yes, I realize I want to use you to help me forget what he did. To take away his touch and replace it with yours. For that”—her eyes drop for a moment before coming back to me—“I’m ashamed of myself, and I’m sorry.” I open my mouth to shut that shit down, but she shakes her head. “It’s not just that reason though, Luca. It’s not even a big part of why I want you to make love to me. I want to because it’s you. I wanted you before today. I wanted you before yesterday. I’ll want you the same tomorrow and the day after and the week after next. What Theo did hasn’t and won’t ever change that.”
Fuck.
I am so fucking done for. Her earnest words rip me to shreds then superglue me back together. How in the hell this woman can want me after everything I’ve done is something I’ll never understand, but damned if I’ll ever be able to let her go now.
I drop my head and kiss her. I put everything I have into the kiss, because she’s giving so much of herself. Her trust, her body, her mind, and I hope like fuck her heart, because she sure as hell has mine.
She tastes like heaven and happiness and freedom and everything else that’s good in life. I bend slightly, tightly wrap my arms around her, and stand back up straight, leaving her legs to dangle. They don’t dangle long, because she wraps them around my waist. My painfully hard cock is once again smashed between us, and I groan into Jules’s mouth at the contact. Her hands fist into my hair, and I fucking love that her control is as precarious as mine. The woman drives me crazy. It’s only fair that I do the same for her.
I break my lips from hers and trail them across her cheek and down her neck.
“I have no fucking clue why you’re trusting me,” I whisper against her ear, needing her to know how important this moment is for me. How damn honored I am to have her in my life. I pull back and look at her. “Fuck knows I don’t deserve it. But I swear to Christ, you won’t regret it, Jules.”
“I know.”
Again, her words flay me alive.
I reach back, turn the water off, then step out of the shower with her still wrapped around me. I grab a towel, and with her help, place it over her shoulders. I leave the bathroom and go into my bedroom, leaving the hallway light on. At the foot of the bed, I put her down then dry her off with the towel. I roughly rub it over my body next before dropping it to the floor.
I take a minute before finally giving myself permission to look over her body. She’s gorgeous. No, she’s more than that. She’s absolutely fucking breathtaking. Her brown hair cascades down her back with some of the wet strands sticking to her skin over her tits. Her neck is slender and graceful, and the plump swell of her tits is amazing. Her waist is trim, but not overly so, and her hips flare out. She’s not rail-thin like so many women strive for. She’s curvy in just the perfect way. The brown curls between her legs, hiding her sacred passage, tempt me beyond measure. I want to run my fingers through the wiry hair until I find the delights of her pussy. Her legs are lean and long, and I can’t fucking wait to feel them around my waist as I take her.
I lift my eyes back to her and find her checking me over as well. Her eyes dance from one part of me to the other. They settle on my cock and it makes my shaft jump. Her eyes fly to mine, and her cheeks stain a pretty pink again.
“Is uh…,” she stutters. Her eyes go back to my cock then rest once again on my face. “Will that hurt going in me?”
I chuckle and tuck a piece of hair behind her ear.
“No, baby. It won’t hurt. In fact, it’ll feel real good.”
Her face relaxes some. “I’m not saying I want to back out, but I’m nervous.” She swallows. “I don’t remember any of the times before. I was still a virgin the last time I remember.”
“We’ll take it slow,” I reassure her. “And if at any time you want to stop, we will. Immediately.”
“I trust you,” she reaffirms, and it sends fucking butterflies to my stomach.
I step forward and cup the back of her head, bringing my lips down on hers. I could kiss her for hours and still want to do it more. Her hands latch on to my shoulders and mine move to her lower back. We kiss for a while, and I feel more tension leave her body.
I move both our bodies back until her legs hit the mattress. I pull my lips away and push her down onto the bed.
“Scoot back,” I murmur.
She slides back across the mattress until she’s lying in the middle. She looks down at me still standing at the end of the bed. Her arms are at her sides and her legs are closed, but they open when I get on my knees at her feet, giving me room and her silent permission. I lean over her, a fist on the mattress on either side of her head. My hair falls forward and she pushes it away.
I kiss her again, sliding my tongue against hers before moving to her neck. She trembles and moans, and I about lose my mind when she puts one leg over my hip and lifts her ass off the mattress, grazing my cock with her warm pussy.
I leave her neck and make my way across her collarbones, nipping and sucking her flesh into my mouth, leaving love bites behind, then move on to her gorgeous tits. I lap at one of the nipples and lift my eyes to hers.
“I love these,” I tell her huskily, then gently bite the tip.
Her hands tangle in my hair, pushing my head closer to her. I draw a nipple in my mouth at the same time I lave it with my tongue.
“That feels so good, Luca,” she moans.
I release her with a pop and move on to the other one, plumping the soft mound with my hand before sucking as much as I can of her tit into my mouth.
Trailing my lips down her smooth stomach, I dip my tongue into her belly button. Her whimpers fill my ears, spurring me on. I can smell her arousal before I can see it, and my cock pulses and jerks with impatient need.
Her thighs are soaked with her juices, and the bruises I neglected earlier glisten from the moisture. Rage has no place in this bed, so I banish the dark thoughts from my head and concentrate on tenderly worshiping the sore flesh with my tongue. I lap up every bit of her deliciousness before moving on to her pussy. I push her legs back to fully expose her to me. Her essence drips from her and my mouth waters at the sight.
I glance up and see her eyes closed and her mouth open as she pants.
“Open your eyes, baby.” She complies, her amber eyes glowing in the partially lit room. “Keep them open and watch me devour you.”
I not only want her to watch me so her mind doesn’t wander, but I like having her eyes on me. I like seeing her face filled with desire and need.
The first swipe of my tongue across her pussy has me groaning and her crying out my name. She’s the best thing I’ve ever had in my mouth. The second swipe has her legs trembling and her eyes fluttering. She fights it, but she keeps them open and trained on me. The third swipe has my control crumpling, and I suck her clit into my mouth.
“Oh, God! Oh, God!” she chants. Her fingers dig into my scalp.
I gently bite the sensitive bundle of nerves and her hips jackknife off the bed at the same time she forces my face closer to her pussy.
She’s so fucking responsive. My dick begs for attention, but I ignore it for the moment.
I place my middle finger at her opening and push just the tip inside. I wait a moment to see if she’s still with me. Her eyes flare with heat and her hand tightens in my hair, giving me an answer without words. I slide my finger in and greedily suck on her clit, flicking my tongue against her for added effect.
Her inner walls clamp down on my finger. She’s deliciously tight, and I know I’m going to have a hard time not coming as soon as I get my dick in her.
I suck, lick, and bite her tender flesh, and am rewarded when she screams her release, her legs going taut around my head and her pussy strangling my finger.
I crawl back up her body once she recovers and claim her lips. My dick bobs between us and bumps against her pussy. I lift my head and ask her one more time. “Are you sure this is what you want?”
There needs to be no doubts in her head.
“Yes. Make love to me, Luca. Make me yours.” There’s no hesitation or misgiving in her tone.
Reaching toward the nightstand, I open the drawer and take out a condom. When I sit up to rip the package open, her hands forestall me. She’s nibbling on her lip, her eyes on the condom.
“Could we… umm….” She trails off and wrinkles her pert little nose.
I smile tenderly at her and kiss away the wrinkle. “Do you not want me to wear a condom?”
Her eyes move back to mine. She hesitates for a moment, but then answers. “No. While I was in the hospital, they gave me the shot. I just… I just want to feel all of you. Is that okay?”
“Fuck yeah, it’s okay,” I growl. “I’ve always been careful, so there’s no need to worry. But are you sure?”
“Completely.”
This woman is completely fucking eviscerating me. With a groan, I press my lips to hers. Her other leg goes around my waist, and I drop some of my weight on her. When the tip of my dick hits her wet center, I nearly lose it. My arms begin to shake and sweat breaks out on my forehead. I’ve never been scared to take a woman before, but I’m fucking terrified I’ll do something wrong with Jules. I want this to be as perfect as possible for her.
I lay my palm on the base of her neck and lightly skim my fingers down her chest, over her stomach, and across her hip bones. Her eyes close and she releases a soft moan. Goose bumps appear over her flesh, and her little nipples pebble even tighter. I glide my fingers through her curls and bend down to take one of her nipples in my mouth, swirling my tongue around the tight bud.
When my fingers meet her tender clit, her eyes fly open and land on me. I keep my gaze on hers, watching her reaction as I scissor my fingers on either side until I reach her opening. She’s so fucking drenched that I easily slip one of my fingers inside her. Her tight warmth grips my finger, causing my cock to throb in need. It lies flat against her thigh, and I press my hips against her, feeling moisture leak from the tip and smear against her skin. I slowly pump my finger in and out then add a second finger while using my thumb against her clit.
Her fingers run through my hair, brushing it back and holding a small handful so it doesn’t fall back in my face. Her legs move restlessly against my hips.
“Please, Luca,” she whimpers. “I need you.” Lust thickens her voice.
I pull my fingers from her tight channel and bring them to my mouth. Her eyes darken as she watches me lick her sweet juices from my fingers.
“I’ve got you, baby. But, swear to me, Jules, that you’ll tell me to stop if you aren’t comfortable.”
She nods. “I will.”
I grip my cock and look down as I guide it to her wet heat. I push the head with the metal ball at the tip against her clit and slide it back and forth a few times before notching it at her opening. I look at her and see her eyes drawn to what my hand is doing, her mouth open as she draws in short, quick breaths. When I shift my hips and an inch slides in, her eyes lift to mine. She licks her lips, and I drop my head to steal a kiss. With my lips pressed to hers, our tongues tangling together, I slowly slide inside her body inch by torturous inch. I stop when I’m halfway, not only to give her time to adjust, but also because I’m precariously close to losing my shit and ending this way too soon. She’s so goddamn tight and warm, so much better than my mind could ever conjure up.
