Best Served Cold, page 6
“I feel better too,” I admitted. “Tonight, this weekend… I wasn’t in a great place when I left my apartment, but now I’m good. Like I hit reset on all that shit.”
River nodded vigorously. “Exactly! I wasn’t looking forward to tomorrow, but now I’m ready for a new week.”
I finished off my beer as River did the same.
“Can I ask you something?”
“Sure.” He slid the pencil into the coil binding of the sketchbook.
“Did Zane talk about what happened at the bar?”
River’s expression went oddly blank. “Yes.”
“Did he tell you about what…happened?”
He nodded.
“Oh.” Was I blushing? I hoped the fuck not.
“We tell each other everything.”
“I figured.” I didn’t look up from where I was staring at my glass, not really seeing it.
“Zane is… He’s… He’s not a bad guy,” River said carefully. “I know he comes across as angry and volatile, and he can be if you cross him, but he’s not an asshole. He won’t tell anyone else because it’s not their business.”
“That’s good to know.” I looked up to find him studying me. “Another? Or do you need to go?”
“I should go.” He glanced at the clock. “Try and get some sleep and all that jazz before work.”
“Yeah, same.”
“What’s your number?”
“Sorry?”
“Your number. Like for your phone,” he teased, pulling his phone out of his pocket.
“Oh, right. Can you tell it’s been a long weekend?” I rattled off my digits when he was ready.
Jerry had been promising to get me a list of everyone’s numbers in case I needed to call in or contact someone outside of business hours, but he’d been dragging his ass so I only had Pops’s number since he was the foreman.
My phone vibrated in my pocket.
“There, now you have mine too.”
I waited as he tucked his phone away and gathered up his things. We walked out of the restaurant together, then parted ways in the parking lot to our respective vehicles.
My head spun with everything I’d learned tonight, and not just about River’s talent for art. He knew about what happened when I kissed his brother, and he didn’t care.
So why had he and Gray been so concerned about Zane before the dare? River obviously wasn’t homophobic if he had drawings of men getting their sexy on in his sketchbook.
Was Zane? That didn’t track either. He and Gray were close, and he’d talked about another friend of theirs named Nick who was also in a relationship with a man.
My heart sank as the truth hit like a pie to the face. Not painful, but definitely humiliating. Zane’s issues with me weren’t because I had a dick. They were because I was me.
All the lightness from hanging with River dissipated and was replaced by the familiar shroud of darkness that never fully went away.
Moving here was supposed to have been my chance at a fresh start. To finally have the life I wanted away from everything that had been dragging me down.
But what if my past wasn’t the issue? What if it really was me and it was only a matter of time before everyone saw what Zane did and I went back to being that lonely shell of a human that had been my existence for twenty-six years?
Sighing heavily, I started my truck and slammed it into drive, already dreading another long night of tossing and turning as my brain decided to torture me with a constant loop of dark thoughts and the highlights reel of every mistake I’d ever made.
5
ZANE
“We don’t have to go in.”
I glanced at my brother as we walked up to Mason’s front door. “Yeah we do. Better put in some face time so they don’t forget who we are.”
“You sure? We can go home and just chill or whatever.”
I’d been in a mood for the past few days, and my brother had noticed. Everything felt amplified and overstimulating. Sounds were louder and colors were brighter. Things I could usually shrug off or ignore cut deep, and I felt like I was constantly on the brink of snapping.
The smart thing would be to stay home and wait for this to pass so I didn’t lose my shit or do something I couldn’t take back, but fuck it. When did I ever do the smart thing?
I might not want to be here, but River did. My brother was an extrovert who needed to be around people. I could suck it up for a few hours so he could get his social battery recharged.
“It’s fine. I’m fine.”
He gave me a look that said he knew I was lying through my teeth but rang the bell anyway.
Mason’s grandparents had a huge house just outside of town that was surrounded by woods and completely isolated from any neighbors. They spent about half the year traveling, so when they were away Mason “watched” their house and used it as a party base.
The door swung open. “River!” Mason greeted with a big smile.
“Hey, man.” River did a complicated handshake with him. “How’s it going?”
“Can’t complain.” He nodded to me and stepped back. “Zane.”
“Hey.” I upnodded him as we walked in.
“You know the drill.” Mason waved around the foyer. “Anything goes on the main floor, use the downstairs bathrooms, or the woods, and stay the fuck away from the upstairs and the locked part of the basement.”
“Got it.”
“Mason!” a female voice shrieked.
He glanced over his shoulder. “Gotta go.” He winked at River and sauntered away.
“Drink?” River asked.
I nodded.
We made our way into the kitchen, pausing every few feet so River could greet the various people who called out to him. By the time we were in front of the kegs, he had three different lipstick prints on his cheeks and another smear on his shirt collar.
I poured a cup from the keg and pressed it into my brother’s hand, then poured mine.
“Want to do a round and see who’s here?” he asked me.
“Sure. You looking to meet someone tonight?”
“Nah.” We wandered toward the living room where the bulk of the people seemed to be. “I mean, if I hit it off with someone then yay, but I’m not in the mood to deal with any of that tonight. Oh, there’s Noah.” River waved.
I glanced over out of instinct just as Noah raised his hand to wave back. Chanel stood beside him, grinning triumphantly.
A sour sensation, followed by a sharp pain, tore through my stomach as she stepped closer and fixed her adoring gaze on him.
“We should go say hi.” River motioned for me to follow as he headed toward them.
I did, barely holding back my retort about Noah being his new bestie.
River told me how he’d randomly met up with Noah after he’d been stood up. I was glad he was there because River had come home in a great mood, rather than the sad and broken one I always saw when one of his dates was an asshole to him. But I also hated that they got along so well.
River didn’t tell me what they’d talked about, just that Noah was a nice guy and they’d had a great conversation. But my brother could talk to anyone about anything, so that wasn’t exactly a ringing endorsement for Noah and his conversation skills. He was still an annoying jackass, but the fact that he was kind to my brother made him tolerable. Sort of.
“Hey,” River greeted as we sidled up to Noah and Chanel.
“Hey.” Noah grinned at River, his smile bright and genuine. I couldn’t pinpoint why that bothered me. Irritation prickled under my skin as he slid his gaze to me. “Zane.”
“Noah,” I deadpanned in the same tone he had.
“How’s the swill?” Noah swiped the cup out of my hand and took a long drink.
“Help yourself.” I didn’t bother trying to get my drink back. I only carried it around so people would leave me alone about not getting shitfaced like everyone else. “Enjoy the backwash.”
He winked and made a big show of swallowing. “Yummy.”
I rolled my eyes as River chuckled and Chanel giggled in that controlled way she did when she was flirting. She hooked her finger through one of his belt loops. Another surge of anger hit out of nowhere.
Noah took a half step to the side, putting a bit of distance between him and Chanel. She shot him an annoyed look but didn’t let go of his belt loop.
I half listened as River and Noah talked about work, keeping an eye on the crowd around us.
“Aren’t you going to get a drink?” Chanel interrupted loudly when there was a break in the conversation.
“I’m good.” Noah lifted the cup he’d stolen from me. “Beer and backwash, what more could a guy want?”
“Ew.” She wrinkled her nose as River laughed. “Come with me to get one?” Chanel shifted so she was standing between Noah and me.
“When we’re done.” His tone wasn’t cold, exactly, but the flicker of aggravation in his eyes was impossible to miss. For me, at least.
“You’re so annoying.” She turned on me. “You too.”
“Right back atcha, sweetheart.” I winked, knowing it would piss her off.
“Ugh. You all suck.” She flounced away. “Mia!”
River snickered into his cup. “Someone’s in trouble.”
“Why would I be in trouble?” Noah asked.
“Because you just ignored your date. I know you don’t know her as well as we do, but my dude, that is one chick you don’t want to cross.”
“She’s not my date.” He snort-laughed and downed what was left in my cup. “Thanks, doll.” He shoved it toward me, his big fist brushing my chest. Strange little tingles flickered over my skin.
“No backsies.” I shoved his hand away. The fuck was that?
“No backsies? Are you ten?”
“Figured it was better than saying fuck off, asshole.”
“So original.” He looked at River. “If I had a dollar for every time old Zaney here called me an asshole, I’d have enough for a tank of gas.”
“Don’t call me Zaney.”
“Sure thing, Zaney.”
“You didn’t come here with Chanel?” River cut in.
“Nope. Met up with her while I was parking and we walked in together. That’s it. She’s too much drama for me.”
“Same.” River swirled his cup, making his thinking face. “I wonder what happened?”
“What do you mean?” Noah asked.
“She wasn’t always like this.” River shrugged. “She was with Mason’s older brother for a long-ass time. They broke up last year and she went from sweet to super bitch overnight.”
“Why’d they break up?”
“He met someone else. An older woman.” River leaned in and dropped his voice. “Like way older. Basically, she’s his sugar momma. She has a good job and he plays house-husband while she pays for everything and buys him whatever he wants.”
“Sounds like a pretty sweet deal, if you ask me.” Noah toyed with the cup.
My eyes fell to his big hands and the gentle way he dragged his finger over the rim of it.
“So much same,” River said. “Our buddy has a super-rich boyfriend who loves spoiling him. He told me about how his guy takes him shopping and tells him to get whatever he wants. No limits.”
“No limits at all?” Noah’s eyebrow rose.
“None. And we’re not talking Target or anything like that. These are the types of stores where they don’t put prices on things and you only get in if you’re on a rich-person list or something.”
Noah whistled through his teeth. “Hell, I’m not into shopping, but I’d suck a dick for the chance to get into one of those stores and have someone buy me a ton of ridiculous stuff just for bragging rights.”
“Right?” River agreed enthusiastically. “Like, where do I sign up for that?”
“Pretty sure Nick does more than just suck his dick,” I interjected. “You willing to take a dick up the ass for some new shoes?” I looked at him in challenge.
He just smiled, his eyes glittering with mischief. “You wouldn’t?”
“Not my thing.”
“You kissed me just to get my name. You expect me to believe you wouldn’t put a dick in your mouth if the price was right?”
“I didn’t say that. Just said it wasn’t my thing.”
“Oh, BRB.” River shoved his now-empty cup into my hand and took off across the room.
Rather than see where he was going, I kept my gaze on Noah. “Kissing me was your thing.”
His eyes shuttered, his expression going hard. “Trust me when I say it wasn’t you that got me excited.”
“Sure it wasn’t.”
“My piercings are sensitive. Anyone touching them would have done that. It had nothing to do with you.”
“Mmhmm.”
“You’re annoying.”
“Kettle, meet pot.”
“That’s not going to work on me.”
“What’s not going to work?” I pried the cup out of his hands. Already had River’s empty cup, might as well throw them both away.
“These mind games. So what if I got a bit hard when we kissed? I already told you it’s because my piercings are sensitive. I’d have the same reaction to licking my arm or bumping my dick against a couch.”
“You get a boner when you lick your arm or bump your dick against couches?” I flicked my gaze to the couch shoved up against the wall about ten feet from us. “Should I warn Mason you might start humping his grandma’s furniture?”
“Don’t be jealous,” he purred. “Just ’cause you’re not as good a kisser as you think you are.”
“Like you’re anything to write home about,” I scoffed. “And I still don’t buy it.”
“Buy what?”
I tossed the cups into a nearby trash can. They bounced off the side, then fell in.
“Buy what?” he repeated when I didn’t answer.
“That your dick is pierced.”
“Thinking about my dick again?” he baited, his voice a low rumble that made my stomach swoop.
“Wondering how tiny it is,” I shot back.
“You felt it.” He took one step closer and squared his shoulders. “Did it feel small to you?”
“You jumped away so fast I couldn’t really tell,” I said, making sure to sound bored and not angry. “But small enough.”
“You really think insulting my dick is going to do anything?” A teasing smile slid over his lips. “You can’t get in my head with that shit.”
“I’m not trying to get into your head. I’m merely pointing out that you seem to have an overinflated sense of yourself. Notice how you were the only one who enjoyed it?”
His eyes flashed with something I couldn’t quite read as the corners of his mouth dropped. “Like I said, it wasn’t you, it was the friction,” he bit out. “I would have won if you hadn’t been so eager to feel me up.”
“Was I eager to feel you up, or were you eager that I did?”
I hadn’t realized we were practically nose to nose until River returned, announcing, “I’m back. Why do you look like you’re about to start wailing on each other?” His arm came between us like a divider. We separated.
“No reason,” Noah told him. “Just having a little chat.”
River looked between us.
“Catch ya on the flip side.” Noah wheeled away from me, his dismissal clear, and sauntered off.
“Should I ask?” River asked.
“Nothing to tell.”
He observed me for a beat. “Okay. Want to wander for a bit?”
It was the last thing I wanted, but I nodded and fell into step beside him.
“Where’s your shadow?”
I bit back a sigh as Chanel sidled up to me. “Busy.”
River had gone off with a couple of guys to check out the new firepit in the backyard. Knowing the guys he was with, they were most likely burning everything that wasn’t nailed down. Hopefully someone had hid the lighter fluid.
“I know what your endgame is.”
“What?”
“You’re one of those podcast bros. Like those incels who think the way to get with a girl is to be an asshole to her.”
“You think so, hmm.” I kept all the inflection out of my voice.
“Obviously.” She stepped in front of me and crossed her arms over her ample chest. “And it’s not gonna work.”
“It’s not?”
She glared. “You’re still doing it.”
“Am I?”
“Ugh!” She stomped her foot. The smell of coconuts and booze tickled my nose. “Fine. Let’s do this.”
“Do…what?” I asked, genuinely confused.
She gave me an appraising look. “Fuck.”
“Yeah, no thanks.” I snort-laughed.
“Really?” She put her hands on her hips. “You saying you don’t want me?”
“Not in this lifetime.”
“Liar. I know what you’re doing, and this is your one chance to get what you want.”
“Go. Away.”
“Is that really what you want me to do? Or do you want to take me upstairs and show me how much you hate me? Come on, Zane, we both know you want to. Unless there’s a reason you never hook up. Do you even have a dick? Maybe you have a micro peen and that’s why you’re always so angry—”
“Stop talking.”
“Or what?” she taunted, swaying on her feet slightly.
Yup, she was drunk.
Fucking perfect.
She poked me in the chest.
“Don’t touch me.” I managed to keep the growl out of my voice, but she was pushing me closer and closer to my limit.
“Why not?” She poked me again, hard enough to sting a little. “What’s big, bad Zane gonna do about it? You gonna hit a girl?”
I clenched my fists. Anger flowed through me like liquid fire, setting my nerves and my entire being on edge. I was backed into a corner and the only way to get away from her would be to push past her.
I was an asshole, but I didn’t put hands on people smaller than me. Not unless I had to.
