Where He Belongs: Gay Romance, page 17
"And there was a storm," Josh said getting more serious.
"How did that go?" he asked.
"Jack did great. He didn't get scared, so I didn't get too scared either."
"Sounds good," Gus said with a grin.
"We played soda factory."
"So Jack knows how to have fun?"
"I taught him how," Josh said, not shy about taking credit. He acted like he had single-handedly discovered Jack and made him the man he was today.
"Wasn't he ever strict with you?" Gus wanted to know.
"Not so much. He was good."
"Were you good?" Gus gave him a sideways look.
"Yes, I was a good kid for Jack."
"That's my boy."
Gus was proud of both of them. It wasn't easy for Josh to be left behind while Gus went so far away. It was a credit to his little boy's courage that he handled it so well. Gus was proud of Jack as well. He had certainly come a long way from being afraid to spend any time with Josh to being the one who could ease his worst fears.
Josh then got thoughtful and looked up at Gus very seriously.
"Dad, you like having me as your kid, right?"
"Why do you ask?" Gus said, smiling at the unexpected question.
"Just making sure I'm doing a good job."
"Are you bucking for a raise?"
"What?"
"Yes. I like having you as my kid. You get an A+ in being my kid."
Josh looked pleased and gave him a hug. "I like having you as my dad too. You are doing a good job. A++."
Gus got a clue as to why Josh might have asked him that odd question when he sat with Jack in the living room to talk over the last few days. They were sitting close with their fingers entwined. Since they would be spending the night together, there was an undercurrent of anticipation between them.
"Josh said you weren't strict." Gus raised an eyebrow at Jack.
"I was reasonably strict," Jack said defensively.
"You were a total wuss, weren't you?" Gus accused him.
"He is a good kid. I didn't need to be strict," Jack said trying to maintain his image as a hardass, but that was a lost cause. "There's something you should know. Josh was talking to me about adopting him," Jack said with a concerned frown.
Gus nodded with approval. "That's a boy who knows what he wants, just like his dad."
"Aren't you worried I'll disappoint him?" Jack said, looking surprised that Gus was a hundred percent on board.
He shouldn't have been. When Gus looked into the future, he saw the two of them raising Josh together, and that was just to start with.
"Of all the people in the world, you're the one I'm most sure of," Gus said looking at Jack with love and confidence.
"Shouldn't you be more cautious?" Jack asked him.
"You're cautious enough for both of us. You worry, and I'll have complete faith in you. We'll be all set, a perfect couple," Gus declared.
*
Jack was surprised that Gus had no reservations about Jack adopting Josh. It wasn't something they needed to worry about yet. Josh was an amazing kid with a big heart. He deserved a great dad like Gus. Though Gus might have confidence in him, Jack didn't have confidence in himself as a father. He couldn't help but think that Josh deserved better.
"I wasn't a good father to Gina."
"Don't worry. Josh won't let you get away with that," Gus told him.
"I noticed." Jack grinned thinking of the irrepressible Josh. He did have Jack wrapped around his little finger. "I always held back from my family, worked too much. I only realized how much I wanted to be a father when I lost Gina. But I also swore I'd never do that to myself again."
"And here you are."
"You undid all my resolutions. You have this incredible power over me. In some strange way I think you remind me of my mother."
"Umm. How should I take that?" Gus asked, narrowing his eyes at Jack.
"You make a family. I don't have that in me. My father didn't either. My mother made us a family. Once she was gone, we were just two people who happened to be related."
"I think you sell yourself short."
"Maybe. But I think you're the luckiest man I know."
"I feel that way too," Gus said. "I have Josh, Liam is on the mend, and there's this new man in my life who's great with my kid. You'll have to settle for third place for now. Once Liam is a hundred percent, you'll move up to second. Josh will always have gold. Can you settle for silver?" Gus asked.
"There's no shame in coming second to Josh."
Gus smiled as he looked over at photos of Josh, which were everywhere.
"I didn't even know he was shopping for another dad. Last year's model not good enough?" Gus said.
"You're pretending to be jealous while I'm the jealous one," Jack pointed out to him.
"Josh already picked you as his next dad. You're in. And maybe I kind of like you too. Maybe I want to give you everything and make you happy," Gus said looking at Jack slyly.
"I'm happy enough for now. Happier than I ever expected to be," Jack admitted.
"Ha! Not if you're not waking up to this every day," Gus said while pointing to himself.
Jack had to smile at the truth of that. He wanted Gus every morning and every night. Feeling greedy, he wondered if Gus was really ready to give him so much of himself. As he leaned against Gus more fully, he felt the strength and warmth of his body. He wanted to be even closer with nothing between them. While he yearned for the man right next to him, Jack noticed Gus gazing at him.
"You amaze me, you know," Gus said. "After what you went through, I know it can't be easy for you to throw yourself into a life with us."
"If you two are willing to give me a chance, I have to do my part."
"I just want you to know that I know what it's like to hand your heart to a child," Gus said with understanding in his eyes. "It's crazy to hand it to a little kid, who can't even walk, and say, 'Don't break this.' It's getting broken sooner or later, that's a given. But I just have to see that goofy grin on Josh's face, and there's my heart. It's broken and it's safe."
As Jack leaned against Gus's chest, he listened to the strong, steady beating of his heart. He felt like his own matched it beat for beat.
For the last few years, Jack had lived his life like a shard of glass, a jagged piece of the man he once was. He never expected that he could find a place where he was wanted and where he fit perfectly.
Gus and Josh were the first thing he thought of every morning as soon as he woke up. In his mind, those two were already his family, his world. It was funny to think that waking up to Josh demolishing something while Gus groaned in his ear was his dream come true.
In the morning, Gus was calling New Zealand while Jack made coffee. The noise that woke them up that morning had been Josh trying to make popcorn balls. After looking up a recipe, Jack decided to help him with his project. It wasn't too difficult.
Now they admired their work – five sticky popcorn balls with M&M's and peanuts lined up on a tray.
"If we don't make something else, I'm afraid this will be our breakfast," Jack said to Josh.
Josh had no objections to that plan. He ran from the kitchen to tell Gus that popcorn balls were for breakfast.
"Says who?" Gus asked.
"Jack."
"He's paraphrasing," Jack said as Gus came into the kitchen and went over to Jack for a kiss. "Just getting creative with some leftover popcorn from last night."
"We don't usually have leftover popcorn. We have popcorn that gets eaten, popcorn that gets spilled on the carpet, and popcorn that goes under the couch cushions."
"I guess I didn't eat my share," Jack said.
"He's making good stuff," Josh said then he spotted a paper that Jack had left on the kitchen counter. It was just an agreement that needed his signature. What got Josh's attention was Jack's name. He looked at it curiously.
"Is this your middle name?" he asked Jack while he pointed at his full name.
"No. It's a last name," Jack told him.
"How many last names do you have?" Josh asked.
"Three. My full name is Jackson Vaughn Diaz Velarde."
"That sounds like four last names," Gus told him.
Josh turned to his father. "Why do I have only two names?"
"Maybe Jack will adopt you. Then you'll be Joshua Dwyer Vaughn Diaz Velarde."
Going wide-eyed, Josh turned from Gus to Jack. "You told him," he protested.
"Of course he did," Gus said.
"I didn't know it was a secret," Jack said apologetically.
"I guess it's OK if Dad knows," Josh said with a pout.
"Did you think you could get yourself another dad behind my back?" Gus asked.
"No. I was going to tell you," Josh assured him. "I just thought when you got married, Jack could adopt me like Sonora's mom adopted her."
"So you have us marrying too." Gus looked over at Jack. "You didn't tell me that part." He grinned at both Jack and Josh. "That's my boy," Gus said and hugged Josh for his initiative.
Jack's eyes got teary as Josh reached over and pulled him into the hug.
Chapter 22
Gus had gone to get Josh from school. Jack was busy in the bistro office finalizing a deal. These days he liked to get all his work done before going home with Gus and Josh.
"This is an interesting office."
Jack jumped hearing the voice and turned to see his father standing in the doorway.
"Dad," Jack said, getting up. "Is something wrong?" He started to worry about what his father's sudden appearance might mean.
"No. It's a surprise visit," his father said as he came in and eyed the very humble office with an amused look.
"You don't do surprises," Jack reminded him.
"But your stepmother does. She changed our travel plans to include a stopover here."
"And you had no say?" Jack said. he knew that not even Christine could get him to do something if he didn't agree.
"I wanted to see you," his father said. "I was hoping we could have a late lunch. Doug has been updating Christine about you, and she shared the news with me. You are seeing a man named Gus Dwyer?"
Jack was stunned for a moment. He hadn't even thought about how he would tell his father. He should have known Doug would beat him to it.
"That's true," Jack managed to say before Josh ran in then stopped short on seeing someone new in the office.
"Who's this?" Josh asked as he came in. He was looking up at Jack's father curiously.
"This is my father," Jack told him. "Dad, this is Josh Dwyer."
"Nice to meet you, young man," his father said.
Without saying anything yet, Josh studied him closely, tilting his head this way and that. Then he turned to Jack. "What do I call him?"
"You can call him Mr. Velarde, or you can call him Alex," Jack told him.
Josh looked at Jack's father again and decided, "I'm going to call him Alex." Josh put out his hand for a handshake. "Hi, I'm Josh. Nice to meet you." He pumped Jack's father's hand hard.
"Nice to meet you too," Jack's father said and smiled down at him.
"Are you interrupting?" Gus asked Josh as he came in carrying Josh's book bag.
Jack introduced Gus and his father. As he did, he wondered what his father would think of Gus.
"We can get out of here if you..." Gus started to say.
"No need, we'll be going to lunch," Jack told him.
"Actually, I'd like to eat here," his father said.
Jack was surprised, but it seemed to be the day for that.
"The pressure is on," Gus said. "I'll let the kitchen know who they need to impress."
"I'd like you to join us. If you have time," Jack's father said.
"Oh, I'll make time." Gus smiled at Jack wickedly.
"And your son as well, if you don't mind," Jack's father said.
Josh looked from him to Gus, who agreed.
"Do you want them to make anything special?" Gus asked after they sat together in the dining room.
"I'll order from the menu," Jack's father said. He looked over the dinner menu as well. "I would like to see at least one lobster dish."
"No lobster!" Josh yelled.
"Sorry," Gus said after Josh's uncharacteristic outburst startled both Jack and his father. "I promised Josh that we would never cook lobster."
"They boil them alive. That hurts. It's mean. My friend Sonora told me, and it made me sad," Josh said then he stared hard at Jack's father.
Noticing the intent way Josh looked at him, he didn't know what to make of it.
"He probably wants you to promise not to eat lobster," Gus guessed, and Josh nodded to confirm it.
Jack didn't wait to hear how his father would phrase his refusal. Jack made an offer to Josh, "How about if I promise never to eat lobster instead?"
Josh jumped out of his chair and came over to hug Jack. He gave him a good long squeeze then grinned up at him with approval.
"Is that going to be worth giving up lobster?" Gus asked, seeing Jack smile.
"Yes," Jack told him. Josh gave him and even bigger grin. He looked so happy and that was worth anything.
"In that case, I'll give up lobster too," Jack's father said.
Shocked, Jack just stared at him.
Josh ran around the table to him and said, "I'm going to hug him too." Josh put his arms around Jack's father and looked up at him. "You're a good dad just like my dad," he said.
"Do I qualify for one of those hugs you're giving out?" Gus asked.
"Yes." Josh went over to him.
Gus gave him a big hug and called him "my tender hearted boy."
Jack turned to his father and saw a wistful smile on his face. He knew his father had a deeply buried sentimental streak, but it had been a long time since he had seen any sign of it. It had been there when Jack's mother was alive, and Gina had brought it out in him briefly. Now Josh was working his magic on his father too. Jack wanted to warn his father to watch out or Gus and Josh would take over his life and make it wonderful.
After lunch, Jack and Gus took his father on a tour of the bistro. Josh acted as the tour guide. Gus and Josh stayed in the kitchen to watch dinner preparations and give Jack some time alone with his father. They went back to the office.
"You do your work from here?" Jack's father said, looking around at the very underwhelming space.
"All I need is a laptop and a desk," Jack said. He didn't want to tell his father how much he liked sharing an office with Gus, never knowing when he might come over for a kiss or a grope.
"I'm glad Christine changed our plans. I haven't seen you smile in a long time," his father said. "And to see you smile as much as you did today..." He trailed off, but Jack could tell it meant a lot to him.
"Don't tell me you approve of Gus."
"Him, no. But I didn't even know your eyes could shine like that." His father's expression grew sad even as he smiled. "Until today, your happiness seemed like something I might dream about but never see."
"I thought the same thing, except I didn't even dream of being happy until I met Gus," Jack told him.
"Can you make it last?" his father said as if he was begging Jack to make his dream real.
"With Gus, yes," Jack said decisively.
"And his little boy," his father added.
"He's a joy I never expected to find after..."
They were both silent for a moment as they shared the pain of loss.
"I'm glad for you."
After his father stepped out, Jack was standing by his desk, looking over his emails when Gus came in and pulled him into his arms.
"So that's what you're going to look like in twenty five years or so. Not bad," Gus said. "Gives me something to look forward to."
Jack had often thought the same thing whenever he saw his father.
"My father is still here," Jack said as Gus kissed his neck.
Gus stopped kissing him and turned to see Jack's father in the doorway.
"I thought I saw you leaving," Gus said to him.
"I was waiting for my wife outside." His father's expression was half disapproving, half amused.
"Oh, well," Gus told him. "I'm all over Jack day and night. You were bound to catch us sooner or later."
Jack groaned while Gus grinned.
"Uptight people bring out the devil in me," Gus said to Jack, who wondered if he was blushing. "You should know that."
That's when Jack's stepmother, Christine, breezed in. She was just as blond and sparkling as Doug, and she didn't look a day older than her son. She kissed Jack on the cheek.
"A relationship looks so good on you. You're handsomer than ever," she told Jack. "Your doing, I assume," she said and went up to Gus. He got a kiss on the cheek too.
"Who's this lady?" Josh asked as he came in with Doug.
"That's my mom," Doug told him. "We've been spending some quality time together. This is Gus's son, Josh," he said to his mother.
"My goodness," Christine said, crouching down to get a better look at Gus's little boy. "You are going to steal so many hearts," she predicted while Josh looked confused.
"He just needs to grow some teeth first," Gus told her.
"I'm working on it," Josh said and showed him a tooth that was coming in.
"That looks like it's going to be a good one," Gus told him, and Josh smiled proudly then got shy when he saw that everyone was looking at him. Gus riffled his hair and pulled him close.
When he and Gus were alone that night in Gus's living room, Jack told him, "In a million years I wouldn't expect my father to approve."
"I charmed him," Gus claimed.
"Josh charmed him," Jack told his ego.
Now that Josh was in bed, Jack was sitting on the living room couch with his laptop. Having just finished the dinner dishes, Gus sat next to him.
"Why are you working?" Gus asked him seeing what was on his laptop screen.
"My father's visit set me back. I have a few things to finish." So much for his plan not to bring work home with him. He had put it off until after Josh's bedtime, but now it had to be done. That's not how Gus saw it though.
