Fortune in Name Only, page 11
Then heard Angela Larson, one of the cabin’s two guests, say, “I think maybe we’re going to check out early.” Clearly addressing Lily.
He stopped forward motion just as he was about to slide back under the sink. Stood up. And saw Brad Larson, standing in the middle of the living area, hands in his pants, looking at his wife as though she’d sprouted some kind of body part he didn’t recognize.
Looking as bewildered as Asa had felt the night before.
“Because of the leak?” he asked inanely, when he had no business doing anything but fixing a leak and letting Lily refund part of the couple’s payment to the Chatelaine Dude Ranch.
“No,” Angela said, looking at her husband, before turning her gaze to the two of them. “Because once we got here, we figured out that there was nothing we wanted to do.”
“I want to fish,” Brad said, as though needing to point out the lie in his wife’s statement.
“I want to horseback ride,” Angela shot back.
Lily shook her head, frowning. “We offer both of those activities here.”
“Yeah, but the whole point of this trip was to do things together.” Angela again. She looked from Lily, to Asa, who’d started to sweat a bit, then toward her husband, and finally back to Lily. All the while Asa’s head was ordering him to vacate, telling him he should have listened to Lily and retreated, rather than putting himself in the vicinity of a marital battle.
He’d had enough of that growing up. Always thinking he needed to stick around so none of the people he loved—including the parents who didn’t seem to love each other—got hurt. Or did something irreparably stupid.
“We’ve...kind of...grown apart,” Angela admitted then, addressing Lily specifically. “I’m a lawyer, he’s in finance. We both love our jobs. And...”
“You hardly talk to each other anymore?” Lily asked, glancing at Asa, who stood there, watching her.
And then heard himself say, “My wife can tell you, I learned, not too long ago, that the way to find your way back to each other after a...separation...is to talk to each other. Not as husbands and wives, but as the friends you were before you got married.”
He was speaking to Angela. Sort of. Mostly, his gaze kept straying back to Lily.
Realizing in that moment that their conversation the night before had been far more momentous than he’d realized. He and Lily would make it through their temporary marriage, intact, as long as they continued to be friends throughout the process.
He could do that.
And, of course, he’d have to stay off the white cake for the duration. No matter how tempting the buttercream icing might be in the moment.
“Do you like to hike?” Lily asked then.
“Yeah.” Both of their guests said at once.
“So maybe you quit trying so hard and head out to one of the trails. We’ve got all skill levels. Getting back to nature, away from the world, exercising, working off tension, doing something you both love...might be good for you,” she said.
That was his Lily. Always able to get to the meat of the point and toss out the minutia that smothered so many chances of reaching an understanding.
“And talk,” Asa blurted, feeling like, as the host, he should be a part of the solution, too. “Just talk like you used to. Even if it’s about work.”
He’d had a great time the night before, better than he had all week, discussing business with Lily. Once they’d figured out how to be “them” again.
“I’m guessing there’s still good feeling between you both, or you wouldn’t be here,” Lily’s soft words hit Asa strongly.
Good feeling.
Yeah. That’s what he felt when he hung out with Lily.
Angela glanced at Brad, who was looking right back at her. “There’s definitely still some of that,” he said tenderly.
At which point Asa dived for the sink. Sliding himself into the cupboard and attacking the plastic. He didn’t need to witness any of the mushy husband-and-wife-making-up stuff.
He and Lily definitely wouldn’t be needing that.
* * *
Lily spent the rest of the day Sunday buzzing inside with replays of her and Asa that morning with the Larsons. She and Asa...marriage counseling? It was ludicrous. And it fit, too. Asa wouldn’t live in a rancorous marriage. He’d fix it, or kindly end it, taking the brunt of all burden in doing so upon himself. He wasn’t a guy who hung around in unhealthy situations.
Asa just didn’t seem to see that about himself.
The Larsons had walked up to reception together, later, to thank Lily, asking her to pass their thanks onto Asa, too, for caring enough to share a little bit of marriage advice with the two of them.
Apparently it was all they’d needed, a middleman to help them see through the job tensions and distractions to find their way back to each other.
They’d scheduled horseback riding for the following day. And had rented fishing poles, too. Two of them.
Asa came in to make dinner with her that night—a first, them in the kitchen together—and she told him about the visit from Angela and Brad.
“I guess we got it right, because being best friends kind of is at the core of having a successful marriage,” she said, brushing against him as she reached for the colander hanging from a decorative holder she’d put on the wall—her breast touching his chin for a second—while she was talking. He stopped peeling the cucumber he’d had in hand. Just stood there at the sink, saying nothing.
Minutes later, as she’d poured hot pasta into the colander resting in the opposite side of the sink, she caught him looking at her breasts.
And tingled all over.
He looked away.
She did as well.
And they both tried to pretend it hadn’t happened.
Over dinner, they talked ranch business, as always, and the moment with the colander seemed as though it hadn’t been.
Which put Lily into another quandary. Had his reaction just been an involuntary male reaction to his skin against a breast? Because a ladies’ man had locked himself into six months of celibacy? Or...just because he was a guy who couldn’t help it that he liked breasts?
Or had it been an Asa to Lily thing?
She liked broad shoulders. But Asa’s shoulders were the only ones she’d ever been so wildly turned on by in the throes of passion, as they were moving above her, that they drove her over the edge. And, even now, drinking in his big, strong presence made her ache to go to bed with him all over again...
She swallowed hard. But she doubted he felt the same way about her. She was very much aware that, with her freckles, her stick-straight hair, and her lack of sex appeal...she’d never been anywhere near the smoking hot category that Asa fell into.
Still, when he asked her if she wanted to sit out on the porch and have a beer before turning in, she couldn’t help remembering that electric moment between them at the sink.
Wondering if...just maybe...it had had something to do with his invitation.
She sat on the porch swing. Asa took a big wooden chair bowed at the back as if made to fit a human spine. They talked about Esme’s wedding some.
Asa mentioned that Jimmy and his parents and little brother had stopped by the barn that day, before they left, to visit with the kitten. He’d ended up giving it to them.
“You what?” she asked, stopping the swing to stare at him. “That’s really cool, Asa! And you’re only just now telling me?”
He shrugged. “It’s just a kitten.”
“Maybe. Or perhaps, to that family, it’ll be just a kitten like Major is just a horse.”
His glance up at her was probing. Like he was looking for more than was there. Reminding her of their wedding night.
And she got hot. Inside. And so very wet.
Couldn’t stop staring at his mouth. Remembering...
Until she almost fell off the swing. And stood instead. Her nearly empty beer bottle in hand, she made to move past him. “I...um...think I’ll turn in,” she stammered. “We’ve got two check-ins in the morning, and I want to double-check the cabins to make sure they’re ready, plus I’ve got another three weddings on the books—all from out of towners—and have to get working on the lodge if I hope to have a decent bridal suite in time...”
She was rambling.
Trying not to look at his mouth again.
And ended up with her gaze on his crotch instead. Outlined in those sexy, tight jeans.
Completely visible by the light through the living room window in front of which he sat.
Of course, she tripped. Because of the bulge. The sight of it had taken every ounce of her focus. Then, to her dismay, the toe of her slipper, caught the inside of his boot, right at the arch, and she would have fallen, if he hadn’t caught her.
In one arm, due to the beer bottle in his other hand.
Laughing, embarrassed and jittery, she quickly righted herself.
Or tried to.
Asa’s hand that had steadied her, caught hers. Yanking her down to his lap, and before she could figure it all out, his lips were on hers.
Devouring her.
Then his hands found her breasts and she arched against him.
Opening her legs, she straddled him in the big chair. Riding his very obvious desire through their two pairs of jeans, and still getting herself off.
Right before she exploded, Asa stood, holding her in place against him with one arm, as her legs wrapped tightly around him.
He made it inside the front door. To the couch. Kissed her again as his fingers worked her fly. He stripped down her jeans, undid his own fly, and was inside her, riding her as she bucked, until they both came to full pleasure at the same time.
Euphoria had never been so all-encompassing. So intense.
Or so fleeting.
Lily knew, the second she came down, that while Asa had most definitely found physical pleasure, he was not sharing her joy.
He’d stiffened almost immediately. Pulled slowly out of her. And then had jumped up off the couch as though he’d been burned.
Closing his fly and fastening his belt, leaving his shirt hanging over it, he was still breathing a little heavy as he said, “I’m sorry.”
She’d been a little slower at gathering herself. Was only just getting her jeans up over her hips when she heard the words.
And had no idea what to do with them. Was he apologizing to her? Or just sorry in general that he’d done what he’d done. Did it matter?
“Me, too,” she told him. Because at that moment, after what they’d shared, to hear him say he was sorry about it...she wished it hadn’t happened, either.
How did a woman feel good about her future, her chances at happiness, when the man she loved with her whole heart regretted making love to her?
“Look, I don’t know why this is happening, but it can’t mean anything, Lil. And we can’t keep doing it.”
The distress in his tone was so clear, so painful, she knew that for both their sakes, she just had to accept the truth.
Not fight it.
“I know,” she said, heading across the room toward the stairs. She stopped with one foot on the bottom step. “But just so you know, Asa, I enjoyed it.”
Chapter Twelve
I enjoyed it.
What in the hell was the woman trying to do to him? With one hand she’d fully accepted that sex would not be a part of their lives. Had never once tried to convince him otherwise. Yet with the other hand, she tempts him?
To be fair, she hadn’t done a thing to bring on sex that night. She’d tripped over his big, booted foot.
He’d done the rest.
With her cooperation, yes, but no surprise there. He knew how to please women. He’d had a lot of experience.
And she hadn’t.
No way the woman was teasing him.
To the contrary, she’d been nothing but the friend she’d been since the first night they’d met. Sincere. Loyal. Accommodating. Asking for...so little.
Too little.
Which was why it had felt great to give her so much. A way out of the dead-end life she’d been living. Fulfilling her heart’s desire with a home of her own. A permanent job at the ranch for as long as she wanted it.
He was the one who was blowing it.
She hadn’t changed. Not even in the clothes she wore. With decent money at her disposal she hadn’t splurged on designer clothes. Wasn’t wearing makeup or having her hair and nails done.
So why was he suddenly so attracted to her?
Because the question just brought sexy visions of Lily to mind—visions he absolutely could not entertain—Asa pushed the wondering away and did what he always did when faced with a problem. He moved through it, over it, or around it.
Except...without knowing why...how did he define the problem? Sex was the result. But what was the problem?
And then it hit him.
On their wedding night, when they’d had sex, the look on Lily’s face, the abundance of happiness in her gaze...he’d felt like a million bucks, being the guy that gave that to her.
So...maybe it wasn’t about the sex. It was about making Lily happy. Maybe it was that look he was craving.
Satisfied that his deductions had a great chance of being accurate, Asa hooked his horse trailer up to his truck, left the ranch before dawn Monday morning, and headed out of town to a ranch he’d once worked for. They were nationally renowned for breeding some of the best quarter horses in the States. A family business, they’d been breeding horses known for their temperament and longevity for more than twenty years.
He’d thought about calling first, to make certain that he’d find what he was after, but decided just to show up. And pour on the charm and even resort to past relations, if he had to, to make sure that he left with a gorgeous young mare.
One that had been earmarked to keep for breeding.
“I’m not going to breed her,” he told Mark, one of the brother owners, and the man who’d offered Asa the top management position to get him to stay on. “I’ll sign paperwork saying so. I’m not trying to compete with you. I just want the best of the best for...my wife.”
Why the words came out Asa had no idea. He hadn’t been planning to spread word of his marriage any further than Chatelaine. Partially because then he’d pretty quickly have to spread news of the divorce, too.
But Mark had to know how vitally important this gift was to him. Why the quality mattered.
“No way, man! You’re married?” Mark glanced at Asa’s left hand. Saw the ring there, grabbed his hand and shook it. And then kept shaking his head all the way to the barn. “I can’t believe it! Asa Fortune has gotten himself hitched! There must be broken hearts all the way across Texas...”
Asa took the ribbing in stride. He’d earned it.
And would be back to earning it again at some point.
He also paid for, loaded up, and took home his first-choice pick. A two-year-old dam—old for breeder weaning, but the average age at which the bond between foal and mother naturally ended.
A gorgeous, shiny brownish red, the girl was a beauty. He couldn’t wait to get her back to the ranch. Played with various scenarios as the miles passed behind him. He’d pull up to the office, have Lily come out to the trailer. Let her lead her girl down into her new life.
Or...maybe he’d get the dam set in her stall in the barn—the one right next to Major—and decorate a little. Make it more like a wrapped present. And let her and the girl bond there in privacy.
He thought about saddling her up, asking Lily to go riding with him, and when he and Major and Lily and the girl were out on the ranch, telling her that the dam was hers.
He’d texted to let her know he’d be gone for the morning, had even told her he was visiting the ranch he’d worked on prior to moving to Chatelaine. To see the owner.
Because they were business partners and he’d be leaving her alone on the ranch.
Because he hadn’t wanted her to need him and not be able to find him.
Because he wouldn’t be on the ranch radio if any problems arose.
Like a missing kid.
The thought reminded Asa of the little guy reaching for his hand that day at the pond. And him having an out-of-body moment where he’d thought he might want a kid of his own someday.
What had that been about?
His mental question went unanswered as another flash occurred to him. The previous night. On the couch.
He hadn’t used a condom.
He’d hit the call button on his steering wheel before the period planted on the end of that sentence. Told the automated system who to call.
“Asa? Are you back?” Lily sounded as though she’d been involved in something when she picked up the phone. Like she wasn’t giving him her full attention.
“No, not yet.”
“Is everything okay?” she asked worriedly. “You sound—”
“We didn’t use a condom,” he blurted. There were things she could do. Take a morning-after pill. He’d had a woman tell him about it once when she’d asked him not to use a rubber because she didn’t think it felt as good.
He’d opted out of sex that night, instead.
“I’m protected, Asa. I take contraception for...female regulation.”
Something he most definitely should have known about his wife. Even in name only. He tried to hold himself in check, to remain completely calm and serious as the relief flooding through him made him slightly giddy.
“Was there anything else?” Lily’s voice came over the phone.
And a vision of her—pregnant—came to mind. Not a horrible sight.
She’d be radiant.
