Patsy of Paradise Place, page 20
‘Nothing to worry about there. The dockers who were standing by waiting for you to bring the stuff alongside turned to and unloaded the cart. They took everything straight on to the ship. As for getting back to work, well you’d have a job to do that in your present state now, wouldn’t you? What’s more, the cart was smashed to smithereens and you have no horse so lie still and get yourself better.’
‘You don’t understand, Dad, I’ve got to work. Patsy needs money to live on.’ A shadow passed over his face. ‘Was Patsy hurt when Samson collapsed and the cart turned over?’ He grabbed at Joe’s hand. His voice sank to a strained whisper. ‘Patsy wasn’t killed, was she?’ he asked hoarsely.
‘Of course she wasn’t,’ Joe said firmly. ‘She wasn’t even with you!’
‘She must have been, she always comes out with me,’ Billy persisted.
‘Well, she wasn’t with you this time. You were on your own.’
Billy shook his head from side to side as if doubting what his father was telling him.
‘Don’t you worry your head about Patsy,’ Joe said firmly. ‘There’s nothing at all wrong with her and she’s well taken care of because she’s moved into our place. Your mam’s letting her sleep in your bed and that’s where she’ll stay until you come out of here. She’s all right and so is the baby.’
‘Baby? What baby?’ Billy asked in a puzzled voice.
‘Patsy’s new baby, of course. Don’t tell me you’ve forgotten about it?’
Billy rubbed his hand over his eyes as if to clear a mist from them and then pushed his fingers through his thick mat of hair. Slowly the blankness disappeared from his blue eyes and was replaced by a look of dawning enlightenment.
‘Of course, the baby!’ he muttered. ‘Little Liam! Yes, you’re right, I’d forgotten about him.’ He grinned up at his father. ‘It must have been some almighty bump I had on my head for me to forget about that!’
Joe Grant waited expectantly. Like his wife he was anxious to know if it was Billy’s child, but Patsy had not said a word and because of her distressed state neither of them liked to question her. Janie had tried several times to draw her out, but Patsy had kept her own counsel.
The smile suddenly vanished from Billy’s face. ‘Where did you say Patsy was?’
‘She’s living with us. Sleeping in your bed for the moment,’ his father repeated.
‘How did she get out of the stable? I left her locked in and I took the key along with me. Did someone find it and let her out?’
‘No, I don’t think so.’ Joe looked puzzled. ‘They couldn’t have done! When she turned up on our doorstep both Patsy and the little one were soaking wet and she told your mam she couldn’t get into the stable to get dry clothes. Your mam had to cut up some sheets and towels and wrap the baby in one of my old woollen vests for warmth.’
‘How did she get out of the stable, then?’ Billy asked in bewilderment.
‘She said something about a tunnel, but we didn’t take too much notice at the time. Your mam thought that perhaps Patsy was rambling because she’d heard about your accident and was out her mind with worry.’
Billy looked perplexed. ‘I don’t understand how she could have heard about it if she was locked in the stable.’
‘She told your mam that she’d seen it on a newspaper placard when she came out of the tunnel, but that didn’t make much sense to us.’
Billy stared at Joe transfixed. ‘She must have found those old tunnels, Dad.’
It was Joe’s turn to look bemused. ‘What bloody tunnels are you talking about, lad?’
‘Some docker told us a tale about there being tunnels under the city. It seems they were dug out over a hundred years or more ago, just after the Napoleonic wars in fact. This fella said there was an entrance in a stable somewhere. It must have been our stable he was talking about and Patsy must have found it.’
Joe shook his head. ‘You’ve lost me, lad. Anyway, the main thing is she’s safe and well and so is the baby. He had a touch of bronchitis, but your mam knew how to deal with that. She rubbed his little chest with camphorated oil and he’s as right as rain now. Bonny little fellow even though he’s a bit on the thin side.’
Billy nodded but said nothing. His mind was racing. It was all coming back to him. Patsy’s mother throwing her out because she was pregnant, his futile attempt to find Bruno, and Patsy saying she’d have to move into the stable because she had nowhere else to stay.
He‘d wanted her to come back to his home and let his mam help her, but she’d refused. She hadn’t wanted anyone to know that she was pregnant. Then before they could decide what she ought to do she’d gone into labour.
He closed his eyes, wanting to shut out all memory of what had happened next. He’d felt so inept, so completely useless. Seeing Patsy in such terrible pain and distress and not knowing what to do had been so frightening. He’d done his best to help her, but had it been enough? If only she had let him fetch his mother, or Mrs Murphy, or a doctor. But he’d been afraid to provoke or vex her. Anyway, he couldn’t have left her alone, not while she was in that state.
After the baby had been born she still wouldn’t let him tell anyone. He’d done the best he could. He’d fitted the stable up with a Valor oil stove so that there was some heating and a Primus stove to warm up their food and to heat up water to bath the baby. It had been a rough and ready arrangement, but it was what she wanted.
Telling his mother that Samson was ill was the only way he could think of absenting himself from home so that he could stay with her. Now Samson was dead. It was almost like a punishment, he thought guiltily.
Samson wasn’t a young horse and keeping him shut up for well over a week probably hadn’t done him any good. Taking him out and expecting him to pull an extra-heavy load when he’d been idle for such a long spell had been too much for the poor beast. That’s why his heart had given out so suddenly.
As he sat by Billy’s bedside, Joe Grant questioned if he had done right to remind Billy of all this. He wondered why Billy had never told them about his feelings for Patsy or about the baby. For the baby to be born in such primitive conditions as a ramshackle old stable was unbelievable. There wasn’t even any water or lighting there and certainly no heating. He and Patsy must have had a reason for carrying on like that and he wondered if Maeve Callaghan was against them marrying.
‘Do you want Patsy to come in and see you tomorrow, lad?’
‘Yeah,’ Billy nodded, ‘and me mam.’
‘Right then I’ll tell them. I wouldn’t think they’d let the baby in so they probably won’t be able to come together. If your mam comes in to see you tomorrow then she can mind the baby the day after while Patsy visits you.’
‘Yeah, that’ll do fine.’
‘If Patsy comes on her own it will give the two of you a chance to make arrangements about what you want to do,’ Joe added with heavy meaning.
Billy sighed. ‘Yes, I suppose so. Neither of us have a job now if Samson’s gone. Anyway,’ he gave a mirthless grin, ‘I’m not likely to be walking or able to do anything useful for quite a while, am I?’
‘No, but there’s still the baby to consider,’ Joe reminded him.
‘Right mess we’re both in, aren’t we,’ Billy said grimly.
‘There’s no need for you to worry, lad,’ Joe told him gruffly. ‘Like I told you, Patsy has moved in with us and your mam’ll keep an eye on her and the baby so you’ve nothing to worry about.’
‘It’s the future I’m worried about,’ Billy told him. ‘Where’s Patsy and the baby going to live after I get out of hospital? They can’t go back to living in the stable now, can they?’
‘She’ll have to stay with us then,’ Joe told him.
‘There isn’t room! Not unless I move in with young Freddie and that wouldn’t work because his room is so small he can hardly turn round in it.’
Joe didn’t know what to say. He’d assumed that the baby was Billy’s and that he and Patsy would get married as soon as Billy came out of hospital. From the way Billy was talking, though, that was the last thing he was planning. He didn’t understand it. ‘We’ll manage somehow, lad, so don’t you worry,’ he muttered. ‘You just get better and things will sort themselves out, you’ll see.’
Seeing Billy lying there so helpless, his leg supported in a cradle, his head bandaged, his face a mass of cuts and grazes, tugged at Joe Grant’s heart.
Billy was a chip off the old block. Perhaps it was because Billy was his first-born that he felt there was a stronger bond between them than he had with either of his other two children.
He’d looked just like Billy when he’d been in his twenties. He passed a hand over his bald head; his hair had been as thick and brown as Billy’s was when he’d first started going out with Elaine. A lot of water under the bridge since then, he reflected. He wondered if Billy would be as bald as he was in twenty years’ time. He was certainly taking on his share of responsibilities!
He didn’t understand what was going on between Billy and Patsy, nor could he work out why Maeve Callaghan hadn’t taken care of her when the baby was born. The whole thing was a complete mystery to him.
When he’d asked Elaine why Patsy couldn’t go and stay with her mother she’d said that Maeve Callaghan was gone, she’d left Paradise Place and a Mrs Blackwood was living in her house.
None of it made any sense as far as he was concerned, Joe thought, but he supposed the truth would come out in the end and all the pieces would fall into place. At the moment, all he wanted was for Billy to get better.
Chapter Twenty-Five
THE NIGHT BEFORE Billy Grant came home from hospital, Patsy hardly slept a wink. She tossed and turned: so many conflicting thoughts were going through her mind. She wished she could get up and make herself a cup of tea or walk around, but she dare not do that because it might disturb everyone else.
The bed was comfortable, in fact from the very first night at the Grants’ it had felt like the height of luxury to her. Yet she couldn’t settle and it wasn’t because Liam was restless.
He slept soundly. The poultice of brown paper, camphorated oil and grease that Elaine had put on his little chest that first night had made his breathing easier and after a couple of days he seemed to be quite recovered.
Elaine Grant had put a feather pillow in the drawer for him. The high sides protected Liam from any draught and he was covered over with a cut-down sheet and a white shawl so that he was both safe and snug.
Patsy tried to blame her sleeplessness on the strangeness of the situation she found herself in. Even now, after three months, she simply couldn’t get used to being in Billy’s home and sleeping in his bed.
Although she’d known Billy since even before they’d started school she had seldom been inside his home. Once or twice she had called for his younger sister Janie who’d been in her class at school.
Even then she had waited on the doorstep while whoever opened the door called out to Janie to let her know that Patsy was there. The only exception had been when Janie had hurt her ankle and couldn’t go to school and she’d brought some homework that Janie was supposed to do. Janie had been lying on the sofa and Mrs Grant had asked Patsy if she’d like a biscuit and a glass of milk. She’d refused because the room had looked so spick and span and well polished that she’d been afraid she might make crumbs or spill the milk.
Now here she was, in the Grants’ house, lying in Billy’s bed with her own baby on the floor beside her. It all seemed so unreal and so different from when she’d been sleeping on a makeshift bed of straw in the stable.
She couldn’t get over how loyal Billy had been and the way he had let his mother believe that he was staying at the stable all night because Samson wasn’t well. She kept wondering what Elaine Grant had thought when she’d found out that it had been a lie. Yet she’s never said anything about it the whole time I’ve been staying here, Patsy mused. In fact, none of them had asked any awkward questions about her and Billy, or about the baby.
From the moment she had arrived, Patsy felt she owed it to Billy’s mother to tell her that the baby wasn’t his. Several times she’d been about to confide in Janie but she kept putting it off because she was afraid that if they knew the truth then Mrs Grant mightn’t let her stay there and she had nowhere else to go.
It had been a shock to find that her mam had cleared off and that no one knew where she’d gone. When Billy had said that her mam had gone away she’d thought he meant that Maeve had cleared off with one of her fancy men. Patsy hadn’t been too concerned because she’d thought that her mam would be back again the moment she was tired of him, or he’d had enough of her. She didn’t for one moment think it meant that her mam had given up their house.
No doubt that was what she was planning to do when she kicked me out and threw all my things after me, Patsy reasoned.
She turned restlessly, her brain racing like a clockwork car. Why did other people’s mams stay put and seem content with their lot? Her mam never had. All those horrible ‘uncles’ in the days when her dad was away at sea. All the rows between her mam and her dad when he’d decided to find a job ashore because she said she’d have no freedom if he did that.
For the first few weeks after her dad returned her mam had promised that from now on they’d look after each other and be really good friends.
And I really believed she meant it, Patsy thought sadly.
The business had been bringing them in a comfortable living. Too comfortable, probably, she thought bitterly. There was always plenty of money available for her mam to spend in the Grafton. She’d started propping up the bar every night, and treating all and sundry to drinks, so she’d quickly made a whole host of new friends. It was probably one of these new fellas she’d gone off with. This time it must be serious if she’s given up the house! Patsy thumped her pillow angrily.
Thinking about her mam and her new boyfriend didn’t help her any, Patsy thought despairingly. She’d be better off thinking about her own future, especially now she’d got the baby to look after as well as herself.
Billy’s mother seemed to think it would be months before Billy was going to be able to work again. And with Samson dead, their business venture was finished since neither of them had enough money to buy a new horse.
She finally fell asleep thinking about what sort of work she could do and dreamed that Bruno had come back and was so happy about the baby that he couldn’t wait to take them both back to Spain.
Her dream was so real that when Liam’s hungry cry wakened her she half expected to find Bruno there.
She put Liam back into his cot after she’d fed him, then snuggled back down into Billy’s bed and pulled the covers up to her chin. She couldn’t get back to sleep again, though, because all her doubts and worries had come rushing back.
She heard the day’s routine start. First it was Joe Grant’s heavy tread as he went downstairs and then the front door slamming behind him as he left the house. Next came the scuttle of Janie’s feet on the stairs as she dashed up and down getting ready for work. Finally there was Freddie, who was now in his last few days at school, banging down the stairs calling out to ask what was for breakfast. Ten minutes later he slammed the front door behind him and Patsy heard the sound of his feet running down the street.
The tap on the bedroom door startled her. Today of all days, knowing that Billy was coming home from hospital, she should have got dressed straight after feeding Liam instead of settling down in bed again, she thought guiltily.
‘I’ve brought you up a cuppa,’ Elaine announced as she came into the room.
Patsy smiled gratefully. ‘I … I was just about to get up,’ she told her. ‘I thought it was best for me to stay here as usual so as not to be in everyone’s way while they were getting ready for work.’
‘Quite right,’ Elaine agreed as she bent over the makeshift cot and smiled down at Liam.
She was not only up and dressed, with a clean flowered apron covering her light blue cotton dress, but even her brown hair was neatly combed, Patsy noticed.
‘There’s no point in rushing,’ Elaine went on as she picked Liam up. ‘They won’t be bringing Billy home until midday so we’ve got plenty of time to get things ready for him. He’s going to see a great change in this little fella, isn’t he?’
‘Yes, three months has made a big difference,’ Patsy agreed.
‘He looked like a little skinned rabbit the night you turned up with him, the night of our Billy’s accident,’ Elaine went on.
Patsy nodded. She knew Elaine was waiting for her to say something more, perhaps tell her that Liam was Billy’s baby. Despite her earlier resolution Patsy felt that now it was up to Billy to tell his mother whatever he thought fit so she remained quiet.
‘Don’t you think Billy would be happier to be back in his own bed rather than having to sleep downstairs on the couch?’ she asked. ‘I’m sure he’d be much more comfortable with all his own things around him.’
‘No,’ Elaine shook her head. ‘It’s better for Billy to be down there. If he’s stuck away up here he’ll feel like an invalid instead of being one of the family again.’
Patsy nodded. ‘I suppose he would find it difficult to get up and down the stairs using crutches and with that metal calliper on his leg.’
‘That’s right, and don’t forget the doctor said he mustn’t bend his leg at all. Anyway, being downstairs will be handier for the nurse when she comes in twice a week to change the dressings.’
‘How long does the doctor think the calliper will have to stay on?’
‘Goodness only knows! When it does come off he’s going to have to learn to walk again. The doctor said he’ll probably always have problems with the leg and that he may have a permanent limp.’
‘Well at least his ribs have healed and most of the scars have gone from his face,’ Patsy said brightly.
‘Yeah! I suppose we should be grateful for small mercies,’ Elaine Grant sighed. ‘I’ve no doubt he’ll be glad to get out of that hospital and be back home with us all, even if he’s on crutches for months to come.’
