Patsy of Paradise Place, page 17
‘Right! I’ll hitch Samson up to the cart while you’re doing that and we can work out some sort of plan for the future as we work.’ He paused and looked at her awkwardly, his face reddening. ‘Do you think you should carry on working in your condition?’
‘I worked yesterday so I can work today,’ she told him. ‘That is if you give me five minutes to sort myself out.’
‘Make it three minutes and I’ll treat you to some breakfast at the café on the Dock Road,’ he promised as he led Samson outside.
As she bent over the horse trough Patsy sensed that something was wrong. Her back had been aching when she’d woken up, but now there was a griping pain and cramps in the pit of her stomach that made her wince and took her breath away.
Knowing Billy was waiting for her outside in the yard she tried to stand up, but the excruciating pain made her gasp.
At the same time she noticed that her clothing was soaking wet and wondered what had happened. Then her heart almost stopped. It could mean only one thing. Gripped by a fresh wave of pain, her fear increased. The baby was coming.
Again she tried to stand up, but her legs felt like jelly. She crouched back on the straw wondering what to do now. Should she call out to Billy or try to manage on her own?
She tried to think what jobs were booked in, and what time their first call was, but her mind refused to function. All she could think about was the pain and what was happening to her body. Her face was wet with perspiration, her clothes were soaked and she couldn’t go home because her mam had turfed her out.
Another wave of pain surged through her body and she yelled out for Billy.
‘The baby!’ she gasped as he came rushing in from the yard. Then another contraction took over her body and waves of pain left her speechless and her mind a blank.
When the spasm was over she flopped listlessly against Billy as he wiped the sweat from her brow and murmured words of comfort.
‘I’m going to fetch your mam, Patsy,’ he told her as he gently laid her back on the straw. ‘It’s for the best, she’ll know what to do.’
Patsy grabbed at his coat sleeve. ‘No, no, you can’t do that, she won’t come, anyway. You know she’s chucked me out! That’s why I’m here, isn’t it?’
‘I’ll go and get my mam then. You need a woman here and she’ll come and help you, Patsy.’
‘No, no!’ She clutched at him wildly as a fresh spasm gripped her swollen body. ‘I don’t want you to do that. I don’t want my mam or your mam. You’ll have to help me, Billy!’
He held her, mopping her face, murmuring words of encouragement, trying to pacify her, but all the time becoming more concerned. He had no experience of such things and had no idea what he ought to be doing.
Patsy’s mop of red curls was dark with sweat. He brushed them back from her forehead and looked down into her glazed eyes. ‘I can’t do this, Patsy,’ he told her awkwardly. ‘You need towels, blankets, hot water.’ He paused and shook his head from side to side. ‘I don’t know what we need, but there’s nothing at all here. Let me go and fetch someone. Perhaps you ought to be in hospital?’
‘It’s too late, Billy. The baby’s going to be born any minute. You’ll have to help me,’ she pleaded. ‘Open up that sack – there’s bound to be something inside it that we can use.’
‘You need a woman here,’ he insisted. ‘Let me fetch my mam.’
Patsy tried to answer him but a contraction twisted her body in a violent shudder. She clung frenetically to his arm, her green eyes imploring, as she begged him not to leave her.
He took a deep breath to steady his own nerves as he gently loosened her fingers. He was scared. He knew he was out of his depth and that the right thing to do was to get help. Perhaps he ought to send for an ambulance. In hospital she would have all the right care.
As if reading his mind, Patsy grabbed his arm. Her voice was hoarse and frightened as she pleaded with him again.
‘All right. I’ll do it your way,’ he promised quietly. He opened up the sack and tipped out the contents, sorting through her few belongings and putting to one side anything that might be useful. The rest he stuffed back in the sack and moved it out of the way.
Removing his donkey jacket and rolling up the sleeves of his checked cotton shirt, he knelt down beside her and loosened her clothing as another contraction left her gasping for air.
‘Try and stay calm,’ he said softly. ‘It will all be over quite soon.’
She looked up at him trustingly and nodded, but before she could speak her body convulsed violently. She tried to control her screams as pain ripped through her and for a brief moment the world around her was blotted out.
From far off she heard Billy’s voice telling her what she must do, but she had no control over her body at all. It was now one seething mass of pain, wave after wave, sending her in and out of darkness.
Then an agitated mewing sound pierced the dark that surrounded her and she wondered why there was a cat in the stable. She drifted in and out of consciousness, tormented by the sound and waiting for Billy to stop the animal from crying.
Vaguely, through a misty haze, she could hear Billy telling her something. He sounded very excited, but Patsy couldn’t understand what he was saying. Something that sounded like ‘The baby is a boy’, but his words meant nothing to her.
She didn’t know what he was on about, and she didn’t care. Now that the terrible searing pain had stopped all she wanted to do was sleep. She wished Billy would go away and leave her alone. She tried to open her eyes and tell him this, but she was so very tired that it was too much of an effort to do so.
Chapter Twenty-One
FOR THE FIRST three days after the baby was born Billy hardly left Patsy’s side. Work was abandoned. He ate and slept at the stable, worrying about the baby, knowing it was probably premature and wondering if he had done all the right things for it when it was being born.
He was torn between whether or not he should tell his mother or someone else about what had happened or whether to comply with Patsy’s wishes.
To cover up for his absence from home, and the fact that he was not taking the horse and cart out each morning, he told everyone that Samson wasn’t well and that he didn’t think he ought to leave him.
No one seemed very bothered, and when he said it was something he could deal with he was left to his own devices. His mother made up a pile of his favourite cheese and pickle sarnies as well as bacon butties each day and left them on the kitchen table for him to collect if she wasn’t there when he popped home.
‘Can you make me some conny-onny ones as well?’ he asked. He remembered they’d been Patsy’s favourite when she was little and he hoped they’d tempt her appetite.
‘I’ll do better than that,’ Elaine Grant promised, ‘I’ll make some wet-nelly and leave you a big wedge of that as well. You’ve always loved it, ever since you were a little lad.’
When he told his mother that he fancied some soup or stew she expressed surprise, but agreed to have some ready for him next time he dropped in.
‘Are you going to sit down and eat it here?’
‘No, I’ll take it back with me.’
‘In that case you’d better take the Primus stove and a saucepan with you so that you can heat it up.’
‘Thanks, Mam. I’ll take the Valor stove as well if you can spare it.’
She looked puzzled. ‘You mean that big one we use to warm the upstairs before we go up to bed in winter?’
Billy nodded. ‘You’re not using it, are you?’
‘Well, no, but it’s not like you to feel the cold, son,’ she frowned. ‘I thought the weather had turned quite mild for April. You be careful where you place it, mind, with all that hay and straw about the place.’
‘I’m not the one that’s cold. It’s to take the chill off the stable …’
‘You and that old horse,’ she laughed. ‘You think more of him than you do of your family! Still, I suppose he is almost as important to you as we are. Without him you wouldn’t be able to work, now would you.’
Afraid that his mother might become suspicious he didn’t dare ask her for any of the other things he required. Instead he visited a junk shop and managed to find a tin bath that he could use to wash the baby, Patsy herself and their clothes in. He also found a shallow wooden chest that he thought would make a cradle.
He needed soap, cotton wool and dozens of other things, as well as warm clothing for the baby. He was scared to buy these from any of the local shops in case someone who knew his mother came in. If they told her what they’d seen him buying she was bound to ask him why on earth he wanted such items.
Billy felt worried whenever he had to leave Patsy and the baby, even if it was only for half an hour. It was risky in case anyone came near the stable and heard the baby crying, but it was something he had to do in order to fetch supplies for them.
Once he’d lined the wooden chest with straw, and then with a warm blanket, he was happy that the baby would be quite safe. It might waken and cry, but it could come to no real harm.
It was Patsy he worried about. For the first couple of days she had a raging fever and drifted in and out of consciousness all the time. In between spoon-feeding Patsy and attending to the baby he put cold compresses on her brow and changed her sweat-soaked nightdress.
By the third day, though, her forehead seemed to be that little bit cooler, her body less clammy. By the afternoon she seemed fully aware of what was going on around her.
While she’d been semi-conscious he’d managed to persuade her to feed the baby whenever she was lucid enough to do so. He’d placed it in her arms and her response to its cry had been automatic. It was almost as if she was unaware of what was going on, or that it was her own baby she was suckling.
By the third day, however, although she was still so weak that she could hardly sit up, she was fully aware of the baby when he placed it in her arms.
Her expression of gratitude when she saw how well it was thriving embarrassed Billy.
‘I still think you should have gone home to your mam, or got someone to come here and help,’ he muttered. ‘I’m not even sure I did the right things when he was born. You ought to see a doctor, Patsy. You really should if only to make sure you’re all right as well as having the baby checked over. He was premature, remember.’
She looked down at the tiny redheaded scrap in her arms. ‘There’s nothing to worry about, Billy. He’s perfect, you can see that for yourself.’
‘You don’t know that,’ he persisted firmly. ‘Look, Patsy, how do you think I would feel if anything went wrong with either of you later on? I’d never be able to forgive myself if we found out that it was because of something I hadn’t done right when he was born.’
‘You’re talking daft, kiddo!’ she protested weakly. ‘There is nothing wrong with either of us.’
‘You don’t know that for sure,’ he repeated doggedly, his square jaw looking stubborn. ‘He’s a tiny baby and he looks a bit frail to me.’
Patsy laughed out loud for the first time since the baby had been born. ‘Listen to yourself!’ she teased. ‘He’s small! Of course he’s small. Did you expect him to be the same size as Samson?’
Billy shook his head in despair. ‘If you think he’s all right then he probably is,’ he muttered. ‘What are you going to do now, though? You can’t stay here for ever.’
Patsy’s face clouded and her momentary happiness vanished. Her shoulders sagged and he felt so sorry for her that on impulse he hugged her, holding her close, stroking her curls, and tenderly kissing her brow.
‘I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to worry you, Patsy, but you will have to make plans for the future, for the baby’s sake if not for yourself.’
‘You think I should tell my mam, don’t you?’ she murmured unhappily.
‘Your mam or … Bruno.’ Even saying the name choked Billy, but he tried hard to hide his resentment. ‘He should be providing for you and the baby.’
‘Yes, I suppose you’re right, but then he doesn’t know I’ve had the baby, does he? I intended to go to New Brighton to talk to him before the baby was born.’
‘Well, you’re in no fit state to make that journey for quite a while yet so why not let me tell your mam?’
She moved free of his embrace and turned to face him, her green eyes pleading. ‘I’d sooner you went over to New Brighton and told Bruno about the baby.’
Billy stiffened. Surely she didn’t expect him to do that! It was the last thing he wanted to do, even to help Patsy.
‘Please, Billy,’ she begged.
‘I don’t know,’ he prevaricated. ‘I don’t think I should be the one to tell him. Anyway, you haven’t even given the baby a name yet.’
Her face lit up. ‘We’ll do it now! You delivered him so you choose a name.’
He shook his head. ‘I can’t do that!’
Smiling, Patsy pulled back the blanket the baby was wrapped in and studied the child. ‘With blue eyes he’s the spitting image of me dad,’ she said proudly.
‘So do you want to call him John?’
She shook her head. ‘No, that doesn’t seem right somehow.’
They stared at each other blankly. He was afraid she would say ‘Bruno’ and if she did he would tell her that wasn’t the right name for a redhead.
‘I like the name Liam,’ Patsy murmured.
Billy felt a sense of relief. ‘Right, that’s it then. The baby is Liam.’
‘So now he has a name will you go and tell Bruno?’ she urged.
‘If that’s what you want. It might take me quite some time, though. Will you be all right if I leave you here on your own?’ he asked anxiously.
Patsy looked surprised by his concern. ‘You’ve left me here on my own before,’ she reminded him.
‘I know, only then you were either asleep or out cold,’ he told her ruefully. ‘I always locked the door and took the key with me,’ he assured her.
‘I’ll stay right here,’ Patsy promised. ‘I don’t want anyone to see me now, do I?’
‘Do you want me to lock the door and take the key with me? Or shall I leave it in its hiding place under the stone outside?’ he asked as he put on his donkey jacket and pulled on his cap.
‘No, take the key with you in case anybody who knows where it’s hidden comes looking for you and decides to let themselves in. I’ll feed Liam and afterwards we’ll both have a sleep,’ she promised.
Sitting in the gloom Patsy felt nervous and on edge. There were so many strange noises that she kept looking over her shoulder. She wasn’t sure if it was Samson as he munched away at his net of hay, or if it was a mouse, or rat, scuttling in one of the corners.
She knew Liam shouldn’t be in such surroundings. Billy was right, she must move out as soon as possible. She’d thought her mam would have come looking for Billy before now to ask if she was all right, but it seemed she hadn’t asked after her at all.
Billy had been a real brick and she didn’t know what she would have done without his help, Patsy thought grimly. He’d cared for her and done far more to help her than she would have thought possible. Having to assist at Liam’s birth must have been a terrible shock for him and she’d never be able to make up to him for the way he’d nursed her ever since.
He’d never had a steady girlfriend. Patsy suspected it was because of his feelings for her and that made her uneasy knowing she didn’t feel the same way about him. He was good looking and a hard worker. He’d make some lucky girl a wonderful husband.
It was dark before Billy returned. She’d already lit the candle in the lantern, but it threw up such weird and grotesque shadows that she was starting to get jittery.
‘I thought you might be hungry so I brought us some grub,’ he said, tossing a newspaper-wrapped parcel on to the straw beside her as soon as he was inside the door.
Patsy’s face lit up. ‘Fish and chips!’ She grinned up at him in delight.
They sat side by side sharing their impromptu supper. Billy had also brought some beer for himself and a bottle of sarsaparilla for her.
Patsy waited patiently for him to tell her how his trip to New Brighton had gone, but in the end she could stand the suspense no longer.
‘It’s bad news, isn’t it?’ she asked shrewdly.
He screwed his empty newspaper wrapper into a tight ball. ‘Yeah! Well, it’s not exactly good news.’
‘Go on, tell me what Bruno said when you told him about the baby,’ she said flatly.
‘He didn’t say anything. He wasn’t there.’
Patsy stared in disbelief. ‘What do you mean by that?’ she asked in a bemused voice.
‘He’s left New Brighton. I asked around, but no one at the fairground seems to know where he’s gone. One chap said back to Spain, another one said he’d gone to Blackpool.’
The colour drained from Patsy’s face. ‘You think he’s cleared off, don’t you?’ she asked in a strained voice.
Billy shrugged. ‘I don’t know.’
‘He’s seemed different lately,’ Patsy went on in a reflective tone. ‘Sort of offhand. I blamed it on the cold weather and with everything in New Brighton closed down it was so dreary.’ She stopped and looked straight at Billy. ‘Did they say if he’d gone on his own?’
Billy avoided her eyes. ‘I’ve told you, no one seemed to have any details.’
‘So what do I do now?’ she asked in consternation. ‘I suppose I’ll have to stay on here,’ she added dully.
‘Unless you ask your mam if you can go back home. At least let me go and talk to her.’
‘If you must,’ she agreed reluctantly. ‘Don’t bother going to the house, she’s bound to be in the Grafton at this time of night.’
Billy returned so speedily that Patsy knew he’d had no luck in finding her.
‘Well?’ she asked the minute he had closed the stable door behind him.
‘She wasn’t there.’
Patsy frowned. ‘Perhaps it was too early for her. Maybe you should have gone to the house after all.’
