The Faking Game, page 24
I feel my jaw part lightly.
‘Why on earth would she think that?’ I ask in overwhelming disbelief.
‘Well… because she did,’ he explains as his cheeks flush bright red.
Evan is clearly embarrassed to be telling me this – how could he not be? Getting caught by his wife, in the shower, with the au pair’s underwear, doing God knows what.
Oh my gosh, I feel so creeped out and uncomfortable – and why is he telling me? I could have lived happily never knowing that happened.
Evan only makes the situation even more uncomfortable by, despite being mortified, maintaining an almost intense level of eye contact. There’s something else in his eyes, something almost apologetic.
‘Oh,’ is about all I can say. I wonder whether he took the bra from my room, or whether he snuck into the utility room and lifted it from the washing. I wonder if it was a clean one or a worn one. I wonder why I’m wondering about any of this because none of the specifics are going to make it any less creepy. Not only is Evan my married boss but I’m really, really not paid enough for this shit. I’m not even supposed to be an au pair, I was hired as a live-in tutor, someone to help the twins with their schoolwork during their formative years, helping them to get the best start in life. Somehow I’ve wound up being a babysitter, a cook, a cleaner – none of the things I started out wanting to do, but just kind of ended up doing.
I don’t really know what to say – what can you say, to such a revelation? I finally peel the long piece of tape from the top of my package, breaking the awkward silence. Somehow this encourages Evan to speak again.
‘She says you can’t work here any more,’ he tells me plainly.
I mean, on the one hand, good. I don’t want to keep working – and living – somewhere with such a creep. On the other hand, though, this is my job and my home we’re talking about – and they’re both things I need, unfortunately.
‘Oh, right,’ I reply, bizarrely casual given the circumstances.
‘We’ll still pay you at the end of the month, for the full month, obviously, but Cerys wants you gone before she gets home,’ he says. ‘Sorry.’
‘Wait a minute, you can’t do that,’ I insist quickly. ‘Evan, I live here, you can’t just turf me out with nowhere to go, and no money. I’m basically skint, what do you think I’m going to do?’
‘I know it’s not ideal,’ he starts, making the understatement of the century.
I lose my grip on the package and, as the box slips from my hands, the contents fall out.
Evan, quick as a flash, reaches out and catches it for me. As he hands me it, he pulls a face.
‘A new Fujifilm camera?’ he points out. ‘Well, they’re certainly not cheap, are you sure you’re as skint as you say?’
He raises an eyebrow suspiciously. Oh, this man is unreal. Where does he get off, thinking he has the right to judge me? Oh, now I remember, the shower. Grim.
‘I didn’t buy this,’ I tell him honestly.
‘It’s addressed to you,’ he reminds me.
My brain briefly wanders off, thinking about where this camera came from, why it was sent to me…
‘Look, I’ll pay you early, but you’ve got to get out of here,’ Evan continues, snapping me back from my thoughts. ‘I need to save my marriage – think of my kids, Jasmine.’
If Evan thought more about his wife and kids, we wouldn’t be in this situation.
I puff air from my cheeks. Obviously, I don’t want to lose my job, but I definitely don’t want to keep working here now, so perhaps my best option is to take the money and run while I still can. My only option, really.
I take the camera (that I really didn’t order, honest) and head upstairs to my room to gather my things. It’s hard to think beyond the immediate, when I feel so uncomfortable, so bizarrely unsafe. It’s not that I think Evan will do anything to me – just my clothes, apparently – but I want to get out of here, before Cerys gets home. Imagine if she thinks I’ve been doing anything to encourage what Evan did? Honestly, I couldn’t think of anything further from my mind, take it from the woman who has to wash his socks and underpants.
I just need to get my things and get out of here, and fast.
‘Obviously, I’ll give you a glowing reference,’ he calls after me as I head up the stairs. ‘And don’t worry, your missing, erm, item is back with you.’
Great, so that’s a new job, a new place to live, and a whole new collection of bras I need then.
It looks like this really is going to be a fresh start – whether I want it to be or not.
We hope you enjoyed this exclusive extract. Long Time No Sea is available to buy now by clicking on the image below:
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
Huge thanks to the brilliant team at Boldwood Books – especially Nia, my fantastic editor.
Thank you to everyone who takes the time to read and review my books. Given that this book is a stand-alone sequel to The Plus One Pact, an extra special thank you to everyone who bought a copy of that book – to have sold over 100k copies of it means so much to me, and to be able to bring these characters back to life has been so much fun.
Massive thanks to the incredible Kim, to Pino, and to the amazing Aud who has every last one of my books on her shelf. Thanks so much to Joey who is always there for me no matter what I need, and to James for being brilliant as ever. Thanks so much to Jess for the beautiful photos and to Darcy for always being by my side.
Finally thank you to my Joe – the undeniable inspiration for the Joe in this book – for absolutely everything and more.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Portia MacIntosh is a bestselling romantic comedy author of over 15 novels, including My Great Ex-Scape and Honeymoon For One. Previously a music journalist, Portia writes hilarious stories, drawing on her real life experiences.
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ALSO BY PORTIA MACINTOSH
One Way or Another
If We Ever Meet Again
Bad Bridesmaid
Drive Me Crazy
Truth or Date
It's Not You, It's Them
The Accidental Honeymoon
You Can't Hurry Love
Summer Secrets at the Apple Blossom Deli
Love & Lies at the Village Christmas Shop
The Time of Our Lives
Honeymoon For One
My Great Ex-Scape
Make or Break at the Lighthouse B&B
The Plus One Pact
Stuck On You
Faking It
Life's a Beach
Will They, Won't They?
No Ex Before Marriage
The Meet Cute Method
Single All the Way
Just Date and See
Your Place or Mine?
Better Off Wed
Long Time No Sea
The Faking Game
First published in Great Britain in 2023 by Boldwood Books Ltd.
Copyright © Portia MacIntosh, 2023
Cover Design by Alexandra Allden
Cover Illustration: Shutterstock
The moral right of Portia MacIntosh to be identified as the author of this work has been asserted in accordance with the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988.
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.
This book is a work of fiction and, except in the case of historical fact, any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.
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A CIP catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library.
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Portia MacIntosh, The Faking Game
