FavoriteObsession, page 27
Another shrug. “Does it matter? The deed is done and both of you will have to deal with the consequences.”
Yeah, they would. Josh closed his eyes instead of commenting.
A long moment passed before the creaking resumed. He waited for Devin to say something else. He didn’t and Josh’s patience snapped. “Just say it and get out of here.”
“I’m worried about you.”
Yeah, Devin wasn’t the only one. Josh shrugged. “Don’t be. I’m fine.”
“My cats don’t think so.”
Josh snorted. “Really? So what do they think is wrong with me?”
“Do you remember anything about the night you got into the fight with Zeb?”
The question shocked him enough to force his eyes open. He squinted against the glare and brought Devin’s concerned face into focus. “What does that have to do with anything? I healed up just fine.”
The lie soured his stomach. The alternative, however, made the churning worse. The night he’d passed out started all the bizarre things going on with him.
“My cats never really paid much attention to you before that night.” A sheepish look passed over his face. “I mean, they acknowledged their responsibility to you because of what Mira did but that’s it. Now…now you’ve captured their attention.”
Hoping to lighten the mood, Josh closed his eyes and grinned. “I thought Lena was the only one who could do that.”
He heard the whoosh of air and snatched the water bottle Devin hurled at his head before it made contact. The realization of what he’d just done struck him. He pried one eyelid open.
“You see? You’re not quite…normal anymore. Human normal, that is.” Devin leaned forward. “You lied about only getting a little cut, didn’t you?”
Josh nodded. No use denying it, not anymore. The mess he’d hoped to avoid by keeping it quiet found them anyway.
“What really happened that night?”
“Zeb didn’t just cut me. He gutted me and left me there bleeding and…” Josh pulled the memory out, let the details wrap around him. He recalled the talk with Zeb and the pathetic fight that ended up with Josh bleeding on his bar’s parking lot and…pain, not just from the knife that had cut him.
“Burning. I remember burning from the inside out. I thought I was going to explode.” A shiver ran down his spine. He grabbed at his neck and coughed, the sensation of something slithering down his throat as real as it had been that night. “I couldn’t breathe. I was choking.”
“On what?”
He shrugged. Oil? Slime? “Blood, I guess.”
Devin sighed. “What else? Come on, Josh. Think.”
“Apple pie,” he admitted. “I thought I was dying. I smelled apple pie and thought my gran was there to lead me to heaven. She wasn’t though.”
“Someone came to you.”
Josh flashed back to the night. The darkness of the unlit lot pressed in on him but Devin’s words brought another memory forth—music, singing and someone walking toward him. The dream he kept getting glimpses of every time he closed his eyes was real. Shit, shit, shit. Josh swallowed hard and nodded.
“Tell me about the golden light.”
He hadn’t said anything about it but the eagerness in Devin’s voice stopped Josh from questioning him as to how he knew that.
“It came just like all the near-death victims claim to experience. The world brightened then centered into a single…point.” Golden arms, golden hair, golden… “Eyes. Golden eyes looked down at me. A woman with golden eyes. She was glad I was dying.”
The swing groaned. A moment later, Devin squeezed his shoulder. “I think you’ve been blessed, my friend.”
“Blessed? Yeah, right.” He forced a chuckle to stop the hope from rising. “I let my guard down and allowed myself to get hurt then stupidly thought I could handle Zeb on my own.”
“That’s not what I’m talking about. There’s a reason the golden goddess is described that way. She’s golden from head to toe with molten yellow eyes…golden eyes.”
“Your goddess won’t come to me. She only appears to pride leaders. That’s what I’ve been told. I’m not a shifter nor am I a pride leader. Those pop your theory, my friend.” Even though he wished they weren’t true.
Devin released his shoulder. The floorboards squeaked as he walked across the porch. “No, you’re not a shifter, but that’s why my cats are fascinated with you. You smell like a human. You just don’t feel like one…here.” Devin thumped his chest. “Hard to explain, Josh. They just know.”
Josh made a noncommittal sound instead of continuing to argue. He just didn’t have the energy to keep it up.
“Josh.”
He glanced at Mira’s twin.
“They said you need to stop fighting, let it happen or else you’re going to die.”
“I thought your animal spirits couldn’t talk to you.”
Devin inclined his head slightly. “Not in words but mine have needed more attention over the years. I understand how they think and know their wants and needs better than my own sometimes. They want you to sleep and embrace the pain before it becomes too great and stops your heart.”
Josh appreciated Devin’s effort to help him. It didn’t change anything. As far as he was concerned, he needed a doctor because the rapid beat and sharp stabbing centered in his chest worried him. A nap wouldn’t help…although he was damn tired.
“Sure. I’ll grab a few Zs before I get ready for work. I want to be there when Mira meets with Micah.” So he could kill the fucker if he put his hands on her.
“I’ll wait for you.”
Josh bit back his curse. “I don’t need a babysitter.” He patted his side where his pistol rested against his rib cage. “I’m good, even have a permit to carry.”
“I don’t like the idea of leaving you unprotected.”
“And I don’t like the fact that everyone treats me as if I’m incapable of taking care of myself or protecting Mira and the girls just because I’m human.” He met Devin’s gaze. “Go home to your mate and leave me the fuck alone.”
Devin cursed some more but did as he was told. He turned his back and walked away. Josh waited until he drove past the tree line before slumping in his seat. The sick feeling in his stomach threatened to heave his guts, something he hadn’t done in years.
“If this is a blessing, I don’t want it.” He fucking hurt.
Minutes passed as he sat there and pondered Devin’s words and everything that had happened to him over the past few days. One thought took root—the golden woman had been glad he was dying. Another surfaced—royal males tied their mates to them by causing a near-death wound and sharing their cats with them.
He grabbed his throat and swallowed hard against the sensation of something oily slithering into his gut. It hadn’t been blood she’d given him to save his life. She’d kissed him and… Sweet Jesus. Had she gifted him with his own set of cats?
Impossible, yet…the intense instincts, the ache in his gums, the itch and burn of his fingertips. And the dreams, the unexplainable dreams where he felt as if he were an active participant. Hope flared.
Stop being so stubborn, child. The memory of a woman’s words and a single crooked, talon-tipped finger calling him to the place where he’d get his answers filled his head.
He ran his tongue along his teeth. No fangs. He rubbed his thumb and forefinger together. No talons. He let his mind go blank. No images came to him or thoughts from any other soul.
Not willing to let the hope fizzle, he willed himself to turn into the lion he’d been in his dream. Nothing happened. He pictured every detail, imagined what it’d feel like to walk around on all fours and embraced the primitive instincts simmering inside him.
Fucking nothing happened. He peered at his tanned skin and cursed.
“I’m a goddamn fool.” He had to let go of the desperate ideas. Disaster lay ahead if he gave them life.
He unbent his stiff and achy legs and shuffled inside. A couple of feet from the stairs, his knees gave out. He dropped to the hardwood floor and clutched his chest. Bolts of electricity ripped from his heart to his fingers and toes. Pain as he’d never known seized him. He couldn’t breathe, couldn’t move, couldn’t see. A black blanket dropped over him, suffocating him and taking the world away. He toppled and whacked his head off the bottom stair.
He waited for the blessed darkness to take the agony away. The relief never came. The pressure centered in his torso increased. The more he fought it, the greater it became. He would’ve arched away from it, thrashed, screamed, anything. He couldn’t. The balloon puffing his chest kept expanding and locked his muscles into place.
A bright spot formed behind his closed eyes, not a golden one. No, this was different, yet familiar. Colors flowed over the undulating surface. Hues of reds to blues. Variations of black and white. They twirled and mixed in an unending flux of…life. Yeah, the description fit. It pulsed with life, his life. The beats reverberated down the white cord connected to him. It mirrored his pulse and fed him strength, but with each passing moment, the beats stuttered. Every thump resonated with less power than the last.
Another tether, this one a collage of shimmering fall colors, extended from the opposite side of the sphere. Beautiful. He wanted to get lost in the swirling kaleidoscope, but the rope was unraveling before his eyes. He didn’t want to lose it. He’d never find his way home if it severed, but no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t grasp it.
The vortex spun faster and faster. Agony built with each colorful thread that snapped. Too much. It was unbearable. God, he was dying. Any minute the glowing ball would burst.
They want you to sleep and embrace the pain before it becomes too great and stops your heart. Devin’s voice whispered through him.
Embrace it? He’d been fighting it for days. He didn’t want to accept it. It scared him. He had no room in his life for the weak emotion, not if he wanted to tangle with the predators. Of course, just as with Zeb, he’d thought he could handle everything on his own. He hadn’t been able to pull it off. Now I’m dying. Dammit, he’d promised Mira he’d make everything right if she trusted him. Tears burned his eyes. Weak. He felt so weak. He was a failure and Mira would suffer for it. Always and forever.
I think you’ve been blessed, my friend. Devin’s words wrapped around him.
Stop being so stubborn, child. Frustration gave a sharp bite to the woman’s voice. The memory of the goddess standing in a sea of nothingness flashed across his mind. Accept my gift before it kills you.
Blessed. He had been blessed. The answer to all his problems had been right inside of him and he’d refused to acknowledge it. He’d been so worried about being accepted by the other shifters that he’d forgotten the most important thing—he wasn’t a shifter. He was human and didn’t have to play by their rules. He’d been making his own since he’d taken his first steps.
He was a leader, not a follower.
A pride leader.
He dragged Mira’s image from the inky blackness, held it close and stopped fighting.
The pressure gave way with a pop that lifted his body off the floor. A third golden rope sprouted from the glowing ball and slammed into him. The three tethers—the white, kaleidoscope and golden—yanked him in different directions, a tug-of-war he couldn’t control or stop. His body seized and he screamed, one continuous roar that seemed to last forever.
He hung in the middle of nowhere and did the only thing he could.
He reached out to Mira, felt her love wrap around him and then he knew no more.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Something alive moved under his skin. Josh knew what it would be, a trio of big cats. At the moment, however, it was a formless entity struggling to understand its host. It wasn’t the only one confused, but he wrapped his metaphysical arms around the blob and sheltered it from the agony still seizing his body.
The grandfather clock he’d inherited from his gran chimed the hours. Each one that passed frustrated him. He didn’t have time to writhe in pain, not that he had a choice in the matter. Mira needed him. He shared in her growing anxiety, but the changes in his body along with the terror of the animal spirits he held inside prevented him from going to her.
At first, he hadn’t been able to make sense of the jumble of feelings they shared with him. With nothing else to do beside roll around in misery on his hallway floor, he’d focused on the whirling emotions whipping through him. After a while, he’d picked them apart until he understood what they were trying to tell him. They wanted to help him and protect him. They loved him, as crazy as that sounded, and were upset because they couldn’t.
He closed his eyes and let himself sink deeper into his mind. The three fuzzy shapes forming out of the blob were tied to a bright spot inside him. It…they were still growing, still forming, still changing him, but the longer he watched them take shape, the clearer their thoughts. They didn’t talk to him, though. They sent him pictures with a push of their emotions to explain what they were showing him.
His eyelids popped open as he finally understood why they were so upset. “Well, shit.”
They were trapped forever inside him because his physical body wouldn’t conform to theirs. If they tried to emerge, he’d pop…literally, body and soul.
“Great fucking gift. Thanks, goddess.”
An image flashed across his mind—him in his lion form at the bar. My dream. Another replaced it—him and Mira as tigers running through a sea of black mist. More snippets danced across his head. In every one, he was a cat.
“Well, which is it? Can I shift or not?”
Another memory surfaced—the golden goddess standing in the middle of nowhere, blackness all around here.
Come to me, child. Accept me and hear what I have to say.
The words he hadn’t been able to hold on to then repeated in his head. Josh grinned.
“Well, damn, I’m—”
The shrill ring of a phone pierced the air. He pushed to his feet and grabbed the landline from the hall table.
“Hello?”
“Are you okay?” Zoe’s voice filled the line.
He hesitated. Was he?
“Josh? Answer me. Do you need me to come out there?”
“No…I’m…fine.” Not quite right but he felt fine. Well, fucking amazing actually. Power thrummed in his limbs.
“Then why aren’t you at the bar? Mira will be meeting Micah in less than thirty minutes.”
Josh ran a hand through his hair. “Shit. I’ll be right there.”
He ended the call and shuffled for the door. The sensation of having his insides ripped apart made each step a lesson in misery but excitement pushed him forward. He didn’t have all the answers, but he had the one that Mira needed to hear.
The gods loved her after all.
* * * * *
Mira cut the engine and dropped her head back against the seat. She panted through the surge of desire. She’d never been so aroused before or wanted to fuck anyone so badly. Her core clenched at the thought of having Josh’s cock lodged deep inside her.
The undeniable lust was the reason she’d called Micah and rescheduled their fake date for tomorrow night. No way in hell did she want to be anywhere near him when she hovered on the verge of having a spontaneous orgasm. The only male she wanted to touch her was Josh. She’d meant to drive to his house tonight and wait for him to come home. Instead, she’d come to his bar. For sex. Dirty, raw and immediate. She felt as if she might die if she didn’t get to spasm around his shaft and pull his seed free.
She shifted her gaze to the employee entrance of the Black Widow. Josh’s vehicle sat there with a few others. No humans lingered close by. She blew out a shaky breath. One more sweep of the lot to ensure she had a modicum of privacy and she slid her fingers under the skirt she wore. Her sensitized skin tingled with the first brush of her fingertips. She skimmed the length of her inner thigh, torturing herself but loving the way her body responded. Once Josh put his big hands on her, she’d combust.
A shuddered sigh fell past her parted lips. She’d never experienced anything like this. She didn’t know why tonight was different nor did she care. The quivering of her inner muscles promised ecstasy. She touched the damp satin of her thong. Soaked. All she’d done to reach this state was picture Josh’s blue eyes. She rubbed her forefinger down her cloth-shielded cleft. Her breaths came faster.
She peeked at herself in the rearview mirror. Her flushed cheeks and dilated eyes would clue even the humans in on her state of arousal. She couldn’t go in the bar looking as if she were ready for a tumble. They’d descend on her with their hopeful gazes while the shifters would be drawn by her scent. She smelled ready for a cock and many of the males, no matter the species, wouldn’t mind offering theirs up to ease her ache. No way. There was only one she wanted.
Fingers hooked around her panties, she shimmied them down. With them kicked off to the side, she spread her legs and pressed two fingers deep inside her dripping center. A groan crawled up her throat. She pumped into herself as she imagined Josh would soon. In and out, she moved, smacking the heel of her palm against her wet lips.
Her moans filled the car. She quickened the pace, the release she needed to take the edge off so close she could taste it. Harder, faster she worked herself but the scent of a male’s arousal drifted to her through the cracked car window and killed the joy of her self-pleasure.
She yanked her hand away and looked out the front windshield. Micah’s eyes from across the lot locked onto hers. Her heart skipped a beat. What was he doing here?
He parted his mouth on a deep inhale. A grin spread over his too-thin face. She bared her fangs. His answering chuckle reached her and stirred her rage. She wiped her fingers against her skin and got out.
Legs spread slightly and hands balled at her sides to hide her talons, she waited for him to make a move. Her instincts urged her to run even though she could easily take on a gang of single-shifters. Josh was inside the building behind her. As her mate, the threat Micah posed should be one he should face, not her. She also knew she couldn’t allow that to happen. His god would take her human mate away from her soon enough. She refused to lose him to anyone else, especially to the male who looked so much like the one who’d ruined her life.
